He put his keys in the ignition, started the car, his foot on the accelerator and the other on the brakes. Before moving he glanced to his right, eyeing Cody. Her red hair shadowing the sides of her face, her bangs shielding her blue optics. To him she looked like an angel, who had merely fallen out of heaven and was trying to find her way back home.
He wanted to reach out a hand and tell her everything was going to be okay. That once they arrived at Cascadia she could completely forget her past life, her worries, her fears, that she could start over new, start a new life. One surrounded by friends, her father, a happy life. But he figured telling her that would be like telling an angel there was no such thing as God.
She just wouldn't believe him.
'When you try your best but you don't succeedWhen you get what you want but not what you need
When you feel so tired but you can't sleep
Stuck in reverse'
She was thinking, actually more like reminiscing. Recalling how she ended up in this van with some boy she didn't even know. In her mind she was going back to the beginning.
The very beginning.
"Oh hey, Sweetheart, sorry I was late, I met an old friend after work and I just lost track of time." The woman's voice was chipper and she was stumbling a bit as she entered her kitchen in the small apartment that she shared with her daughter. Her eyes fell upon the 9 year-old girl sitting at an end of the large oak table.
"It's okay, Mommy, I understand. You forgot to lock the door this morning so I just let myself in." The child explained and her mother cringed.
"Alright, are you saying you don't need me?" The lady's eyes glinted with anger and the girl got up and pushed her chair away.
"No, Mom, I still need you, but you weren't there so I let myself in because you forgot to lock the door." She said nervously.
"Forgot? Are you accusing me, little girl? And your damn right you need me, Cody. You're just a brat, a spoiled brat." She spat, inching towards her daughter who didn't dare reply or back away. "You think it's easy being a single mother? I have no life because of you! I've wasted the last 9 years of my life taking care of you. And the one time I have fun and do something for myself you accuse me of being a bad mother!" She was now towering over Cody. And Cody could smell the now-familiar scent of alcohol surrounding her mother.
This isn't Mom, this is the bottle.
Mommy doesn't hate you.
The bottle does.
Not Mommy.
She looked up at her mother's face. The colour of her skin was flushed making her red hair stick out. A thick coat of eyeliner had been applied onto the rims of her eyes.
I love you, Mom.
Please don't hit me.
You don't hate me.
The bottle's confuses you.
You don't hate me.
Mama doesn't hate me.
Cody knew she was trembling because she knew what was coming. She knew how much it was going to hurt. She knew the mark that would show up. She knew it all to well.
I love you, Mom.
It all happened in a split second, but not to Cody. No, to her it was all happening in slow motion. At first her mother's hand was above her head, and slowly it was coming down, aiming for her cheek.
Mama doesn't hate you.
Mama doesn't hate you, Cody.
Mama isn't the bottle.
Mama, I love you!
She closed her eyes tightly shut and bit her bottom lip as she felt the impact of the slap with such intensity that involuntary tears began to fall.
"Stop crying you stupid girl, you'll make me feel bad. Mommy is already feeling sick, I'm going to bed. Mama needs to go to bed." She spun on her heels and headed towards her bedroom.
"You're not my Mom!" The words escaped Cody's mouth and her mother stopped dead in her tracks.
"Shut up, idiot, I have pictures to prove it."
No, you're the bottle.
Don't worry, Mom, I'll save you.
The bottle won't hurt us anymore.
I'll find a way to keep it away.
Even if it kills me.
'And the tears come streaming down your faceWhen you lose something you can't replace
When you love someone but it goes to waste
Could it be worse?'
The highway lights lit up the inside of the van. Illuminating Cody's already beautiful face. And he knew she was glowing. Even though her mind was filled with a thousand different emotions, even though she was probably the most heartbroken and angsty teen he had ever seen, she still had a spirit in her. A radiant spirit. He had seen it when she called him Superman and when she laughed in McDonald's. And he'd make it his mission to hear her laugh again and make sure she'd never lose that presence that was Cody Myers.
'Lights will guide you homeAnd ignite your bones
And I will try to fix you'
Her lips, her full pink lips, those lips were pressed in a firm line, with it's ends curved downwards. He had never seen a frown look so beautiful. And then he wondered why he was thinking all of this. He had met her about 3 hours ago, and already he was vowing to protect her. Already she meant so much to him.
And he wondered if he meant that much to her.
A year later and the ten year-old was lying on her bed in a mixture of blood, sweat and tears. The man had hurt her so much, enough to make her bleed, enough to make her sweat from trying to get away, enough to make her cry from the pain. And where was her mother? Probably in the other room all over that man, who had distraught the girl in such an inhumane way.
Enough was enough.
I love you, Mom.
I hate him.
He's a monster.
But you love him.
He makes you happy.
He's a monster.
I love you.
Run, Cody, Run!
'And high above or down belowWhen you're too in love to let it go
But if you never try you'll never know
Just what your worth'"Everything okay? You to cold? I can turn up the heat if you'd like." He offered, trying to focus on the road ahead instead of the pretty girl next to him.
"Uh, um, what? Sorry I wasn't paying attention" Cody shook her head, trying to snap out of her daydream.
"If you're cold I can turn up the heat." And for a second she thought he was making a move on her, and she almost wanted to burst out at how lame he sounded but she really was cold so she shrugged it off.
"Heat would be nice." She smiled
"Heat it is."
'Lights will guide you homeAnd ignite your bones
And I will try to fix you'
