Group Therapy - You know they need it!

ah, another FMA fic. Script-style! XD inspired by an F4 therapy fic i read. flippin funny. Here we go!

Therapist: Welcome, Ed, Al, Winry, Roy, Hughes, Riza, and Havoc!

Everyone else: hiya!

Therapist: so, Ed, let's start with you. I understand you have some temper issues, especially concerning your height. Is this true?

Ed: WHATIDONOTHAVETEMPERISSUES! (what i do not have temper issues) -veinpop-

Roy: Shut up, little fullmetal. No one cares.

Ed: WHOAREYOUCALLINGSOSHORTHECANSITONTHECURBANDLETHISFEETDANGLE! (who are you calling so short he can sit on the curb and let his feet dangle)

Therapist: I see. And Mr… Mustang, is it? I see you like to provoke him.

Roy: Maybe a little. HE THINKS HES BETTER THAN MEEEE!

Ed: I DON'T THINK THAT!

Therapist: see?

Ed: I know that.

Roy: -snap-

Ed: -RRRRRUUUNS!-

Therapist: anyway, mustang, I understand you have other issues?

Roy: I have no other issues…

Riza: he needs to keep his mind out of the gutter, thats what…

Therapist: ah… hm… well…

Roy: I DO NOT!

Riza: YOU WANT TO GET PROMOTED JUST TO MAKE THE WOMEN LOOK LIKE SLUTS!

Therapist: Look… like… sluts?

Roy: Ah, well um…

Hughes: ((a/n: this takes place pretending that he never died. That made me wanna hurt the writers XD)) Yeah. He wants to be promoted, just so –

Havoc: And I quote: --

Riza: "all female officers will be required to wear--"

Hughes, Havoc, Riza: "TINY MINISKIRTS!"

Roy: well, I mean, -sinks further into seat-

Therapist: is this true?

Roy: -sinks further in his seat- y--yeaa… I guess…

Riza: what was that, sir?

Roy: yes… its true. -sigh-

Therapist: I see, I see… -writes stuff down- well, lets move along… Ms… Hawkeye is it? why are you here?

Riza: someone needs to help keep the colonel in line.

Therapist: I dont believe that's it. I think its more. Nobody's perfect, riza, everyone has an issue.

Riza: Sometimes I feel… lonely… there aren't really any special guys in my life, y'know?

Therapist: so, you just haven't met the right one, or… what?

Riza: Well partly that, but… I mean, I kinda have, but… HES AN IN IMMATURE WOMANIZING PERVERT!

Roy: I AM NOT!

Riza: Who said I was talking to you?

Roy: Uh… I love you?

Riza: 0.0 … what?

Roy: you heard me…

Riza: Roy, can I talk to you for a second? -grabs roy by the arm and leaves-

Roy: Huh? What the--

Hughes: - I thought it was about time he get himself a good wife.

Therapist: And how do you know Mr. Mustang?

Hughes: We've been friends for a long time now.

Therapist: I see… and you have some obsessive issues?

Hughes: What do you mean?

Therapist: Don't worry about it. It's typical for parents to be a little… over-excited about their children, when theyre so proud of them.

Hughes: OHYOUMEANMYDEARESTELICIA? (oh you mean my dearest elicia)

Havoc, Al, Winry: uh-oh…

Hughes: -holds up 10 photos at once- LOOK! ISNT SHE THE CUTEST! YOU SHOULD KEEP A PICTURE OF HER IN YOUR OFFICE ONE LOOK AND ALL STRESS FLIES AWAY! SHES 3 NOW! CAN YOU BELIEVE IT? THEY GROW UP SO FAST! IS SHE NOT THE MOST ADORABLE THING YOU'VE EVER SEEN! ISNT SHE? HM? HM?

Therapist, Al, Winry, Havoc: -nervously nod-

Therapist: oooookay then… we'll move on. Um, winry, you have some control issues I see?

Winry: no, not really. What do you mean?

Ed: -falls out of sky- ((a/n: this is funny if you read my last fanfiction, interview with roy.)) YES YOU DO! WHY ELSE DO YOU BULLY ME AROUND?

Therapist: You bully him around?

Winry: NO I DON'T! -waves wrench at ed- right, little Edo-kun?

Ed: WHOAREYOUCALLINGLITTLE! (who are you calling little)

Winry: See, he has issues, not me!

Ed: -to winry- you have more!

Winry: NO I DON'T! YOU DO!

Ed: no you do!

Winry: NO YOU DO!

Ed: NO YOU DO!

Winry: NO YOU DO!

Ed: NO YOU DO!

Winry: NO YOU DO!

Ed: NO YOU DO!

Winry: NO YOU DO!

Ed: NO YOU DO!

Winry: NO YOU DO!

Ed: NO YOU DO!

Winry: NO YOU DO!

Ed: NO YOU DO!

Therapist: ENOUGH!

Ed & winry: -silent-

Therapist: Now, I can see you are working out your differences, but you must do it CALMLY.

Ed & Winry: BUT--

Therapist: NO BUT'S! ((a/n: ed has a nice one! muahahaha))

Therapist: Now, your session is over. But I believe we had a good session today.

Havoc & Al: What about me?

Therapist: Blondie, get off the cigs. Metal-head… whats your problem?

Al: I'M STUCK LIKE THIS! ITS VERY DEPRESSING!

Therapist: Boo-hoo, have a tissue! w00t! THAT RHYMED! -jumps out the window-

Havoc & Al: -look at each other- that was weird.