: Perfect World :

Gensomaden Saiyuki

Disclaimer: I don't own Gensomaden Saiyuki, which rightfully belongs to Minekura Kazuya.

Rating: PG-13

Pairings: Hakkai/Gojyo, mentioned Homura/Goku and Gonou/Kanan

Warnings: AU-ish, angst, language, shounen ai

Notes: I apologize that the formatting is messed up, in comparison to earlier chapters. Apparantly using double hyphens is now taboo as well, nevermind that it's the way I show the difference between hyphened words and breaks in speech...

Oh well. After this story I'll probably just type in Word instead of transfering.

Constructive criticism and feedback is appreciated.


Chapter Twenty-One

The balcony was so narrow that Sanzo could feel the curtains from inside the sliding glass door brushing against his ankle. He shifted his leg to get away from the annoying tickling sensation; his gaze turned toward the sky as he dangled a half-empty beer can from his thumb and two forefingers. The night was cool, so he had decided to drink a little. It was a rare moment when he didn't feel wound up or tense, so his cigarettes lay momentarily abandoned on the table inside.

The air was almost ridiculously peaceful. Sanzo half expected an ambush to crawl out from beneath his bed and attack him while his back was turned. Come to think of it, that seemed to be the only tactic the enemy hadn't tried so far.

Speaking of which, we haven't seen that brat in a while, he thought suddenly, bringing the can to his lips. The alcohol had a faint tin taste to it; just as Sanzo liked it. Chilled beer was the only alcohol he was willing to drink. Anything stronger seemed too base, but nearly everything more refined always left a too-sweet taste that didn't agree with his tongue.

He heard a soft telltale scrape on the roof behind him. Rolling his eyes, Sanzo lowered his gaze to peer down from the second story of the inn. Wonderful. That simple thought had jinxed him.

He spoke in an exasperated tone. "What do you want?"

From the strangled noise that emitted from the intruder's mouth Sanzo knew he had successfully surprised him. He allowed himself a satisfied smirk, keeping his eyes trained on the ground and pretending to be lazy. It should have been disturbing how he had known who it was without even looking, but it just felt natural.

The boy's presence felt natural, and at the same time uncomfortable. It made Sanzo want to beat his head in.

"How did you know it was me?" Goku's voice sounded softer than Sanzo remembered. Either his memory was getting a little rusty or something had happened to the boy. Deciding it couldn't possibly be him, Sanzo rested the blame on his visitor. He also decided that if something had happened to cause this small but noticeable change in the boy, it was none of his business.

Keeping those thoughts to himself, he said aloud, "It's not hard to smell a monkey that close." There was no need to be honest with him- and anyway, Sanzo had discovered during their last encounter that if he pushed the right buttons he could get an interesting rise from the boy. It was cheap amusement, yes, but with the entertainment he was surrounded by on a day-to-day basis any change was welcome.

"I'm not a monkey," Goku protested.

Sanzo snorted softly. "You sure like high places," he said, not exactly changing the subject. He lifted his head back to survey the rest of the town. There was no hint of enemy activity aside from the child behind him. Even then Sanzo wasn't sure if it was appropriate to call it an "enemy activity." The last time Goku had visited him it had clearly been an independent act.

So independent, in fact, that it made Sanzo honestly wonder where the boy's loyalties really lay. He had claimed he would never betray his leader, but this was the second time he had willingly sought Sanzo out. It made the priest more than a little skeptical.

In response to his question, Goku said, "Yeah, well... we live in a tower." Sanzo tilted his head just enough for him to catch a glimpse of the boy from the corner of his eye. Goku was still on top of the inn, kicking his legs over the side as he lay on the slanted roof. From the quick glance it was hard to tell if his eyes were closed or not. "I'm used to high places," he added as though in an afterthought.

Rolling his eyes, Sanzo asked heavily, "Are you sure you should be telling me that?" The silence was answer enough; the blonde scoffed and straightened up a bit, bringing the can to his mouth for a swallow. "Simple idiot," he muttered around the tin.

"I'm not simple," the boy whined. Sanzo ignored him; he didn't like giving spoiled children attention, after all. His lack of response seemed to make the boy sulkier.

"What do you want?"Sanzo rotated his wrist a bit, listening to the can's contents slosh around faintly. A slight hiss accompanied the sound, but he paid it little mind. Most of his attention was on the boy behind him, waiting for his answer.

"Do I have to want something?" Goku returned with a question of his own. Sanzo had to grudgingly admit that the boy was smarter than he had just given him credit for. Now it was his turn to consider the question. Somehow he saw their developing conversation as a puzzle of sorts. Something about the boy intrigued him, and it had more to do than just getting Goku on their side for his power. Sanzo was far above asking something like that.

But if he could make Goku think it was his own idea, there was nothing wrong with that. Nobody could mock him, say he was getting attached when he really wasn't, and Sanzo would be doing his job as ordered by the Sanbutsushin. After all, who could fault or tease him for that?

"Everyone is out to get something," he finally said in a low voice. "Even if it isn't stealing, even if it's as drastic as a life, everyone is wanting something."

The boy couldn't seem to find anything to say to that. Smirking again, Sanzo lowered his chin to make sure the expression was hidden in the shadows.

Goku's next question startled him. "Can I have a drink?"

Sanzo finally turned, the small of his back against the railing as he eyed the boy skeptically. Goku had pushed himself up, leaning back on his elbows as he looked straight at Sanzo. They were close enough for Sanzo to see his eyes, even in the surrounding darkness. What he saw was curious. Goku didn't seem hard to read, and if that was the case then Sanzo knew the emotions he was deciphering ran along the lines of hurt and sullen.

So the boy had come to brood and pile his teenage angst on him. Exasperated, Sanzo said shortly, "This isn't a kid's drink, you idiot."

"I know what it is," Goku said defensively.

"Then you know you're nowhere near the proper age to be drinking it," Sanzo returned, taking a swig just to irritate the boy further. It seemed to work; Goku was glaring at him now.

"How do you know?"

The blonde quirked an eyebrow. "How old are you?"

Goku hesitated, which was indication enough that he was going to try to lie. "Twenty-two." Sanzo snorted, and the boy quickly backtracked. "Okay, fine, eighteen."

"I might buy that," Sanzo muttered, knowing full well there was no way the boy was eighteen years old. Even for someone who was as active as Goku clearly was, the brunette still had some roundness to his cheeks that spoke of more childish years than adult.

Seeming insulted, Goku asked, "Well, how old do you think I am?"

"Ten," the priest said calmly.

The boy bristled, flaring. "I am not ten! I'm almost sixteen-" He paused, seeming to realize what he'd just done, then growled in frustration and flopped on his back again.

Sanzo didn't even try to hide his smirk this time. He shook his beer can a little. From the sound of it, the contents were nearly gone. Were any sober person to try drinking it, there was no possible way they could get drunk.

Deciding he wanted a cigarette anyway, Sanzo reached up as he started back to the glass door, giving the boy's foot a push. When Goku sat up Sanzo held up the can, waiting until the boy had taken it before continuing inside.

As he grabbed his cigarettes the boy complained. "It's mostly gone!"

"Good observation," Sanzo said dryly, tapping a cigarette from the pack. He briefly considered telling his visitor that there was more alcohol in the compact refrigerator, but then decided that could wait until Goku decided if he even liked the taste or not. After all, it wasn't as though he were in charge of the child. If that had been the case he wouldn't have even let him try the beer.

But he was not in charge of the boy, and thus Goku wasn't his responsibility. He cupped a hand over the end of his cigarette, lighting it before he walked back outside.

Goku was draining the rest of the can's contents just as he emerged. The boy made a face. "Ugh... that was kinda bitter. How can you stand it?"

"It's an acquired taste." Sanzo paused to take a soothing drag of nicotine before continuing. "That's why I told you it's not for kids."

"Is it supposed to taste that flat?"

"Shut up and drink it," Sanzo said irritably.

Shaking the can at him, Goku said, "It's gone. There wasn't much left, you jerk." With a sigh the boy cast the empty can a forlorn look before he crushed it against the shingles. The crunch made Sanzo wince; it seemed loud enough to wake the entire town. Luckily, it wouldn't- and it didn't seem to.

Sanzo turned his eyes to the side, peering at the dark window of the room next to his. Hakkai and Gojyo were sleeping there; he remembered seeing Hakkai running his fingers on the wall to his left before finding the room. Not even the curtains stirred, so it seemed that the noise hadn't woken them.

Then again, for all he knew they were awake and eavesdropping on them.

Turning his thoughts back to the present moment, Sanzo resumed his earlier position against the railing, crossing his ankles. "I know you didn't come here to get alcohol off me," he stated flatly. "This has to be completely out of your way, so I know running into you isn't coincidental, either."

"Mm..." The boy nodded a little, closing his eyes. "We actually live east from here. It's takin' longer and longer to find you guys."

"Why bother?" When Goku shrugged Sanzo scowled, observing the boy closer. It was almost as though he were making small talk just to fill the silence. "If you're trying to spy on us, you're doing a shit job at it."

Goku actually laughed. The sound was startling, mostly because Sanzo was sure he hadn't said anything even remotely amusing. The laughter continued to be drawn out too long, making him change his mind about it. The laugh was actually dry, almost angry. That was a strange way to describe it; angry laughter. To Sanzo, it seemed like an oxymoron.

Then again, anything with this kid is moronic...

Now that he could understand someone laughing at, had he said it aloud. Sanzo found he briefly wished the boy were closer so he could smack him on the head. Shaking himself, he instead grumbled, "You're such an idiot."

Wiping his eyes, Goku said through half-hysterical giggles, "At least..." He paused, shoulders shaking as he struggled for control of himself again. "Better that than... than a child who doesn't understand," the boy finally managed to choke out, still laughing. It sounded weaker now, pained.

Sanzo grimaced. He really didn't want the boy's problems piling on his shoulders; he had enough of his own. Despite that he found himself asking sarcastically, "Problems with your parents?"

His comment made the laughter abruptly cut off. Goku opened his eyes, his eyes nearly bronze with burning anger. "They're not my parents," he growled, the change in his voice so drastic that Sanzo blinked.

He tried not to show his surprise. "Whatever. I'm right, aren't I?" He swung his arm to the side, flicking the ashes loose over the edge of the balcony.

Goku didn't reply at first. The boy thumped his heel against the roof a couple times, suddenly seeming more interested in his boots than Sanzo. Scoffing, the blonde brought the cigarette to his lips again. Just when he closed his eyes Goku spoke softly.

"I just... really hate being ignored, y'know?"

Sanzo resisted the urge to say no, he didn't know. He supposed he would be less than pleased if someone brushed him off when he was trying to talk to them- but he rarely tried talking to anyone. Most people listened to him anyway, either because they recognized and revered him as a high-ranking monk or in some cases even because of his looks.

He thought, somewhat randomly,that if Gojyo ever tried calling him pretty again he would shoot the bastard between the eyes.

Goku seemed to take his silence as the go-ahead to continue. "Don't you ever just... your friends get on your nerves, and all you wanna do is hit something? Or hit them?"

So he was having personal issues with one or more of his teammates. Uncrossing his ankles to he could lean his weight on one foot, Sanzo thought about the question and found himself agreeing with the boy. Since he didn't want it to look like that, he instead said, "What's your point, idiot?"

Not seeming to mind the barb, Goku murmured, "I don't know. I just wanted to get away."

Sanzo couldn't resist asking, though he already knew the answer. "Is that why you ran to find me before?" Goku said nothing, but he nodded. Sanzo had hit the nail on the head. He rolled his eyes. "If you hate it so goddamn much, why don't you just leave?"

He had expected a vehement reply, a fierce reiteration that the boy would never abandon his team. Instead he was met with silence. Blinking, Sanzo had to look up to make sure the boy hadn't fallen asleep. Or died. Goku had stopped swinging his feet and was staring at them, a small frown on his lips.

"I don't have anywhere else to go," the boy finally said.

"Then find a place."

"I don't think anyone would take me in..."

"Some people like annoying brats."

The quiescence that followed his remark made him think Goku was sulking because he had been insulted again. Looking at him proved the guess wrong; Goku was still looking down, still appearing strangely thoughtful.

When Goku finally spoke it was slowly, as though he were picking out his words as he thought about them. "If I did that... left them, I mean... would you guys have me?"

Sanzo arched an eyebrow. "Why should I?" he asked, being careful not to include his other two companions. He wasn't going to speak for them, not on a question like that. Besides, since they had apparently dubbed him as the unspoken leader, he didn't see any reason why he should even consider what their opinion might be on a subject like this.

Goku shrugged. Changing the subject, he said, "You know, there's somethin' that's been bothering me lately-"

"I don't want to hear your family problems," Sanzo interrupted crossly.

Hackles rising, Goku snapped, "It's not a family problem! It has nothing to do with me. Do you even hear people out when they're talking to you?"

"What's the point?" Sanzo glanced down, noting that his cigarette was nearly burned to a stub. He took a final drag of it, blowing the smoke into the night air so that it briefly obscured Goku's face. The boy's nose wrinkled, but Sanzo ignored it. "Nobody has anything interesting to say."

"How do you know I don't?" At the look Sanzo gave him, Goku immediately backtracked, clearly not wanting an answer to that. "I was just wondering what your real name was."

The question sent an unexpected jolt through Sanzo's entire body. He paused in the middle of moving back toward the room, forgetting about the cigarette still burning in his hand. Staring at the boy, Sanzo wondered what had ever given him the idea that "Sanzo" wasn't his real name.

Then he remembered. The god, their leader, the one they called Homura- he had called him "Konzen." Where he had gotten that name Sanzo had no idea. He hadn't liked - still didn't like - how the boy's companions had treated him as though they had known him for a long time. That sort of familiarity irked Sanzo, especially when he didn't even know who they were.

After the discomfort passed Sanzo finally found the words to answer. "It sure as hell isn't Konzen," he said flatly, cursing himself for the slight waver in his voice. He acted as though it hadn't happened. If Goku noticed it he didn't comment.

"Well, what is it, then?" the boy persisted.

"None of your damn business."

Goku didn't seem so ready to give up. "I heard your friends-"

"Companions," Sanzo cut in sharply.

Ignoring him, Goku continued as though he hadn't spoken. "-call you something else. They call you Sanzo."

"And so will you, if you know what's good for you," Sanzo muttered. He was beginning to grow irritated with the boy's presence. Opening his mouth to tell him off, a sudden hot, sharp pain in his fingers made him yelp before he could get the words out. He dropped the cigarette, shaking his stinging hand and cursing softly. Crushing the stub beneath one of his sandals, Sanzo found he was grateful for not taking them off before stepping outside.

But a burn was a burn, and his fingers stung like hell. Damn brat, making me forget that, he growled inwardly, ignoring the boy when he asked if Sanzo was okay. He kicked the cigarette butt over the edge of the balcony, stalking inside and to the adjoining bathroom so he could run cold water over the injury. If this prevented him from being able to smoke in the morning, Sanzo was going to kill something. Right then he could only think that Goku had better be smarter than he looked, because if he didn't leave that something was going to be him.

There was a too-audible thud that told him Goku had left his perch atop the roof. For a split second Sanzo thought he was leaving, but the sound of footsteps in his room told a completely different story.

Without turning, Sanzo snapped, "Get out."

The footsteps hesitated. "But-"

"I said get out!" Turning off the faucet, Sanzo turned to glare at him. "I don't recall giving you permission to come in. I don't care why you're here- we're still enemies as long as you're with your teammates. Understand?"

Goku fidgeted, though he didn't lower his eyes this time. "I... if I left them-"

"Don't be stupid," Sanzo said coldly. "For the last goddamn time, get out."

This time Goku finally nodded, taking a couple steps back. He opened his mouth as though to say more, stopped when Sanzo's glare hardened, then gave another small nod before he turned and left. Sanzo nearly snapped at him for climbing over the railing, but bit his tongue and simply watched as the boy went over and disappeared.

Once he was out of sight Sanzo remembered his mission. Growling softly, be thumped his forehead with the heel of his hand. Stupid, stupid, stupid, he told himself angrily. Even if he is annoying, you're supposed to get him to go with you. How the hell are you going to make that happen now?

Damn his orders. They got in the way of everything. Alternating between cursing himself and the boy, Sanzo at last decided to retire for the night.

Unfortunately, his sleep was restless.

-

Leaning sideways, Gojyo rested his hand against the wall to steady himself as he peered out the crack the curtains over the sliding window. He smirked faintly, pushing some dark strands of hair from his eyes before he leaned back. "Kid's gone," he reported.

From the corner of his eye he saw Hakkai nod. "I see. And Sanzo?"

"Hasn't come out. Must've driven the kid off." Gojyo finally pulled away from the window, deciding Goku wouldn't be returning anytime soon. "So?"

"So what?"

"What do you make of that?" Gojyo asked, a hint of impatience in his voice.

His lips twitching into an amused smile, Hakkai said calmly, "I think it was rude of us to eavesdrop."

Gojyo snorted, though he was secretly relieved that Hakkai had said "us" instead of "you." That indicated that he was more at ease with the concept than he let on with the rest of his words. Then again, it shouldn't have surprised him- Hakkai was the master of words.

"So? It pisses me off that he thinks he could make such an important decision without consulting us," Gojyo groused. "I mean, hell, the kid would affect us if he did come along."

"Perhaps that's just it," Hakkai suggested. "Maybe Sanzo doesn't intend for him to come along."

"It's the principle of the idea, Hakkai. The principle." Threading his fingers through his hair again, Gojyo leaned his head back against the wall. "He's already so damn high and mighty."

A soft chuckle made him open an eye. Hakkai's head was turned down, giving the impression that he was staring at his hands. Naturally, Gojyo knew better, but it still gave him a sharp pang of emotion in his chest. It had been a habit of Hakkai's to look at his hands when he was thinking about something; Gojyo remembered it from their weeks of living together before Sanzo had tracked Cho Gonou down.

Sometimes he wondered if Hakkai missed being Cho Gonou. Sure, as that man he had lost a lover, committed mass murder, and had witnessed many horrible things... but he had also had his sight. He'd been able to see color, to see the night sky littered with stars, to see the hand he was dealt in a game of poker.

Gojyo opened his mouth, intending to ask if his suspicions were true, but quickly shut it again. As close of friends as they had become in such a short period of time, they still weren't that close- and it was none of his business even if they were.

"What are you thinking about?"

The question made him blink. At first he could only think that Hakkai was getting uncannily good at sensing his various moods, but then Gojyo's brain finally kicked into gear. He said the first thing that came to mind. "Wishing I could get laid."

"Ah." Hakkai fell silent, though Gojyo knew it wasn't from embarrassment. They were men; they were adults. They were more than capable of talking about sex without becoming uncomfortable. So long as they stayed clear of the topic of Hakkai's former lover, in any case. "My apologies," the brunette finally said.

Gojyo waved a hand idly, then quickly stopped, knowing Hakkai couldn't see it. "Whatever. It's no biggie."

Sounding too amused, Hakkai said, "Well, I'm sure it could become a 'biggie' if we don't distract you."

Snorting, Gojyo said, "I wasn't aware you had a crude sense of humor."

At that Hakkai arched an eyebrow. "I certainly don't, but take it as you please." Gojyo was a little skeptical of that, but wisely kept quiet. "I was merely offering to distract you somehow."

"What, with sex?"

The words had come out before Gojyo had time to think about them. He blinked, then immediately regretted speaking. While he and Hakkai had slept together before, it had only been on occasion. When it took place they never talked about it- it just happened. They never talked about it after the fact either. It was an unspoken agreement between them. Or at least, it had been.

Hakkai seemed equally surprise. After a long bout of uncomfortable silence he murmured, "Perhaps we should sleep."

"Yeah," Gojyo agreed hastily, peeling the blankets away from the bed. He shifted so he could get beneath them. "Good idea."

Hakkai merely nodded, his hand sliding across the covers until he found the end tucked beneath his pillow. Gojyo shifted his eyes as the man crawled beneath them. Berating himself for speaking without thinking, he rubbed his eyes before stretching out on the bed.

To his surprise, he heard a gentle, "Good night," before quiet enveloped them again. Breathing a soft sigh of relief, Gojyo just nodded and settled down.

At least, he thought before drifting off, he isn't mad at me.