Chiefhow- Hello my new bestfriend! I would throw rosepetals at your feet if you would send that story to me! I miss it like a lost pet…Could you send it to would be soooo happy if you did!


I heard a commotion outside as I stepped into the chamber that housed Arthur's round table. The caravan must have returned. Someone had torn a silk red tapestry off a wall and laid Galina on it. Lancelot was sitting in a chair in front of her. His head was in his hands and I pitied him. I walked forward and looked at my dear friend. My oldest friend… Her eyes had been closed and her face had been wiped clean. She looked peaceful…Angelic… I sat on the arm of his chair and draped myself over his shoulders.

"All these years I've withheld my pity for fallen knights. Yes, we all deserved something better, but we all faced death everyday. I cannot keep myself from wishing it was me this time however…" I said thoughtfully as I stared into space. Lancelot found my hand and squeezed it.

"No one's ever died for me before." He said and I kissed the top of his head.

"Well, don't expect it to happen again." I said wryly. He sat up and pulled me completely in his lap. I wasn't uncomfortable, because there was nothing more to it but the love of a brother and sister.

"She loved me didn't she Isolde?" He asked in a somewhat lost voice.

"She loved you before she ever knew you. You were all she ever wanted." I said honestly.

"And I just threw her away…"

"No. You were sometimes…callous to her, but you could not make yourself love her." I said forcefully. Galina had deserved to be loved, but Lancelot did not deserve to go through life hating himself.

"I did love her though…Just…not the way she needed me to." He said while touching her cheek. "I should have married her."

"Well that time has come and gone Lancelot." I said. "Galina left you a son. You wish to honor her? Then raise him. And no matter how many sons you have, remember that he was your first."

"I will." He said getting composure. His face fell again. "Oh gods Isolde… I can't raise a child!"

"Of course you can." I said patting him on the shoulder absentmindedly.

"Help me." He said desperately. I looked at him as if he was stupid.

"What? Did you think I was just going to give you his crib and say good luck? I'm going to be there for you always."

"Thank you." Lancelot said finally. We sat in silence for a while longer.

"We need to find a boat." I said. Lancelot looked at me curiously. "It's what she wanted… To be burned like that."

He nodded and stood up. He went to get a pot of water and some cloth, while I went to find a dress of hers and some herbs.


First, I made my way down the hut of the young woman who supplied me with my herbs. I was relieved to find her there.

"You need something for the dead? Here you go…" She said handing me a small sack of various flowers and herbs. I handed her a few coins. "I'll be making these for days…"

"You told me once that one day I might need never bother with the stuff you give me anymore…" I said changing the subject. The woman looked at me with piercing hazel eyes.

"The herbs…You take them for to long, and they will do their job too well. A woman's body will adapt itself eventually…" She said cryptically. Damnit, couldn't she just answer?

"You mean I could never bear a child?" I asked getting straight to the point. She nodded with a slight smile.

"It's hard to tell really… Some girls can take them for only a few weeks and they will suffer for it for the rest of their lives. Some women have taken them for years upon years and still born a child in their life." She said while continuing to cut up leaves and such. I narrowed my eyes.

"Do you have a habit of leaving that small detail out?" I asked and her smile broadened.

"You girls who come to me… You all say you have a lover but you want no child. You never thought to say for how long." She said. "Of course I tell some of them. But you…I've seen you. Why would a knight need a baby? Your friend, the gold one, she was constantly worried about balancing herself between being a mother and a warrior."

"Women have been doing both for hundreds of years. A woman doesn't have to give up either." I said somewhat defensively.

"Then why did you come to me?" She asked turning towards me. I let my eyes pass over the green strips bound in her thick earthy braids. She couldn't have been a day over twenty five.

"I don't want a child."

"Then why are you complaining? You gave up your scout, why should you care if you can bear a child or not?" She asked with no real force.

"Tristan never wanted children anyways, and what would you know-" This woman was getting under my skin like no other. I was about to lose my calm.

"Oh really? Has he ever told you that he wanted no son or daughter?" She interrupted with a knowing smile and wide eyes. I paused.

"He has made it very clear that he doesn't want to settle down." I said while restraining myself from giving a haughty, victorious smile.

"Yes; perhaps your scout does not want a family and home chaining him to a certain life or place, but like you said, why must anyone be forced to choose between family and the sword?" She said with wisdom. I was at a loss.

"But-"

"Who's to say he never wanted a wife? A woman to go to at night…A woman who was a companion, not a shrew."

"You can't mean-"

"A woman to one day give him children. A son or daughter that might love the same things the mother and father loved. Why would a man need to fear such a family? There are different ways of life. You should know that, nomad." She finished solemnly. She turned back to her table and blade. "Now get out of my house Sarmatian. I have work to do."

I closed my mouth and walked silently out of the hut. I barely paid attention as I made my way to the barracks. I looked at Geraint's empty crib as I walked in Galina's room. Vanora must still have him. I opened up the old, worn chest and pulled out what I would need. I set aside her old worn green dress and laid an old brooch on it. I grabbed her bone comb near it also. I took her soft leather slippers and finally, I grabbed her delicate shift.


I made my way back to the hall and found Lancelot sewing up the wound to her middle. It was growing dark outside and we would soon have company. I grabbed her comb and a wet rag and began to clean her hair. When her hair was clean and wet I combed it out to dry. Lancelot and I cleaned her face and body and dressed her. We put her in her the pure white shift and Lance fingered it gently as if remembering when he had seen her in for the first time. She had looked like a goddess or an angel. We finished putting the dress on her, but as an afterthought, I left the front of it open to display her shift. Once everything else was taken care of, I set the packet of herbs by her side and Lancelot put two gold coins on her eyes. We left her there and reverently shut the door.

"Where's the baby?" I asked. His eyes looked tired.

"With Guinevere." I nodded. I knew that Guinevere might have a soft spot for the child of Lancelot, but she would never try to replace Galina. We made my way to Arthur's chambers and knocked. He let us in and I saw that they had just finished a meeting of some sort. Merlin, Modron, Mordred, Guinevere, Geraint and Dagonet all sat around Arthur's table. Lancelot took his son in his arms and sat down with him. He looked at Modron for a moment and his face suddenly paled a bit. I looked at my new friend and saw the way the fire illuminated her dark features. Surely Lancelot was not falling in love with another woman already? He had just lost Galina and found Guinevere. No… It was something else I decided as he shot an even more disturbed look at the child next to Modron. I realized that Modron was now the leader of her people. Lancelot shot a perturbed glare at Arthur and then back to the boy as if comparing the two. I examined the boy a little closer…Yes he resembled Arthur, but surely it was just because Mordred's mother was Arthur's niece? I felt a little chilled…

"Guinevere and I will marry in four days time." Arthur said suddenly. Guinevere kept her eyes lowered away from the handsome knight as Arthur made the announcement. Lancelot's jaws clamped together and hi ears backed visibly. He swallowed and regained control of his composure after a moment.

"So soon? Eager are we?" He said with a forced suaveness.

"Many people are going to be angry with the move to join the north and south. Best to unite them while they're still drunk on the victory." Arthur said. Join the people? Oh dear gods…That meant that- "I'll be crowned king."

"Arthur what is this madness?" Lancelot said fierily. "You've saved these people, why can't we all just leave?"

"I've found a purpose for all this Lancelot. They're going to need help rebuilding and strengthening themselves. Lancelot, Isolde, there are more Saxons. More Irish. It isn't over yet." He said trying to make us understand.

"Arthur, I'm under your command for the next eight years. I will not question you. Better here than Rome." I said making it clear that the objections would be from the others, not myself.

"Thank you Isolde." Arthur said with a mournful sincerity. I knew the guilt he would be feeling over Galina's death. Mordred walked swiftly to my side and latched on to my tunic. I absentmindedly stroked his hair.

"Arthur, " I began before he could continue. "I must ask your blessing to return to my family for some time."

He knew I had my reasons. He nodded and I decided to leave them to their meeting. Mordred followed me out of the room and walked beside me, hand still clinging to my tunic. I was exhausted I realized as I trekked to my room. I collapsed on my bed and flung anything off me that made me uncomfortable. Mordred wandered around my room and observed everything. I liked the boy. He was quiet, always taking things in. His tanned skin made his dark blue eyes look bright and fey like. His small fingers traced the griffin on my shield reverently. Eventually as my eyes drooped, he blew out the lamp and left me to my sleep.


I woke in the morning and immediately called for a bath. I waited longer than usual for the hot water to be brought and I attributed it to the confusion of the past day. I immersed myself in the steaming water and smiled broadly. I thought of Galina and how I would never see here big doe brown eyes again. Tears pooled in my eyes and stung far more than the blistering water I laid in. I allowed myself to shake and cry. Just this once…Never again. I stayed like that for quite some time until finally my mind made my body stop. I pushed down the pain and sat up. I quickly scrubbed at my hair and body, carefully avoiding the stitches on my stomach. I stood up and began drying myself. I heard the door open and I looked to see March in my room. He took in the sight of me and stepped forward. Thinking of the obnoxiousness of Yseult and the words of the witch woman, I nearly shrunk away. I began looking at March in a different light. I had not known him for long, but he made me feel something I had never felt before… A strange tingling in my middle and blushing cheeks. An excitement…Now that I thought of it, I didn't want to go through life like a giddy fool. But he was handsome and amusing and he wanted me… I couldn't think properly. I needed to know what he was to me. And so I let him kiss me. And then I let him lay me on my bed, for I didn't know any other way to tell.


A while later I laid awake in bed. March was asleep with his head on my shoulder and his arms wrapped tightly around me. I felt choked. Too coddled… I froze as my door opened and Tristan and Gawain looked in. They must have known that March had not come in the night before, for they looked surprised to see the woad in my bed. Gawain looked edgily at the sleeping man while Tristan turned away quickly and left my doorway.

"Up!" Gawain roar. March leapt up.

"Isolde, it's time." Gawain said in a much quieter voice. I nodded and put on my burgundy dress quickly. I left my hair down and wild. I didn't care about it. I went to Lancelot's room, only to find him awkwardly trying to clean up Geraint. My nose twitched distastefully as I shoved the helpless father away and took over the operation. We finished and walked side by side to the stables. Dagonet and Galahad had wrapped Galina in the red silk tapestry and gently put her in a wagon. We mounted our horses and made our way to the place where Galina's boat was waiting. It was just Arthur, Geraint, the knights and Guinevere. We all rode silently for a few hours until the coast finally came into view. A local fisherman was waiting for us there with an old boat. Arthur gave the man some gold and we put Galina into the boat. I let the surf lap at my bare feet. A wind blew my hair to the east and I smiled. Galina would reach home before I did. That morning, as I had laid in March's arms, I had decided I would leave that day. I was sorry that I would miss the wedding, but I couldn't fight the strong pull towards my homeland.

"Here lady…" A young girl with windswept hair said as she handed me a bundle of flowers. I smiled softly as I thanked her. I bent next to the rocking boat and scattered the flowers in the boat. We had wrapped her hands around the small satchel of sweet smelling herbs provided by the herb woman. Guinevere held the baby as Lancelot stepped forward and dropped the torch at Galina's feet. We pushed her out to sea as the flames over took the boat. My peace was made with Galina. Now I needed to make it with our families.


It was mid afternoon when we arrived back at the fortress. I immediately went to my room and threw everything I owned in a bag. I gathered every single one of my weapons and packed my quiver full of arrows; it would be a dangerous journey. Galahad and Gawain entered the room and quietly observed what I was doing. Then they left and I continued. I was not going to be stopped. I carried what I could to the stables and loaded up Kolaksay. Mordred was waiting for me when I returned. He watched me solemnly as I gathered the rest of my things and then disappeared. I finished loading Kolaksay and went to find March. Everything was like a blur. I was going home.

"I'm leaving." I said as I found him, Yseult, Kaherdin, Modron, Mordred and some other young woads around a campfire near the edge of the forest. Mordred looked to be in the middle of telling his mother. March blanched and stood up.

"I go to my homeland." I said before he could object. "I need to see my tribe."

"It's long! And dangerous. Please, stay-" He began.

"No." I said with finality. I would end the argument before it began.

"Do not try to stop her." Modron said quietly.

"Would you let anyone tell you never to return to this land?" Kaherdin asked March wisely. March looked around for help. I knew at that moment that I did not love him. It seemed strange to need to come to that realization when I had known him for mere days. But it made it easier.

"I want you to take my son." Modron said while looking into the fire. I kept my face mask like as I waited for her to expand on the issue. She continued to twist a twig in her hands for a moment longer. She tossed the twig in the fire and looked up to me.

"He needs to." Was all she said. I looked at her for a moment longer. Trying to unravel whatever secret she was hiding. I could find nothing in her eyes.

"It will be dangerous." I said quietly. She nodded knowingly. I looked at Mordred. He watched me with his somber face, but I saw the hopefulness in his eyes.

"Get ready." I said after a moment's hesitation. He bolted into the trees and returned moment's later with a small bundle. I nodded a farewell to the group and returned to the fort.

"Jols!' I called out and the man came running. "I need a horse for the boy. Sturdy enough for a trip to Sarmatia."

Jols disappeared for few minutes and reappeared with a pale gray horse. The mare was smaller than the average horse, but sturdy and quick looking. Mordred stepped forward and touched her nose.

"What's her name?" He asked.

"Una." Jols said. "White wave."

The boy walked around to her side and looked at me expectantly. I picked him up and set him in the saddle.

"You know how to ride?" I asked. I didn't have time to teach a child how to ride a horse. Luckily, he nodded. As an afterthought I ducked into the stables and grabbed an old wooden shield. I held it up to his back thoughtfully.

"Mordred, I'm going to put this on Una's back. If I tell you to cover yourself while we are riding, you grab this and wear it on your back." I said looking the child in the eyes. He nodded. I couldn't believe I was taking a five year old to Sarmatia.

"I will." He said with intelligent eyes.

"You're bringing the boy with us?" Gawain asked incredulously as he appeared with his loaded horse. Galahad was right behind him.

"Us?"

"You thought you were going off by yourself? Ha." Galahad said. "I'm going home."

Gawain gave him a warning look.

"I know you'll make me come back eventually…" Galahad mumbled shooting odious looks at Gawain and me. I was somewhat elated that they were coming with us. I missed the way things had used to be…Somewhere along the line, we had drifted apart. Arthur and the others strode over to us.

"Now?" He asked. He had not thought I would leave so soon. And I was taking two of the other knights with me. I nodded. His shoulders sagged a bit. "How long will you be gone?"

"Don't know." I said and Gawain and Galahad shook their heads in agreement. Guinevere stepped forward and handed me a bundle of food. I realized sheepishly that I had forgotten… I smiled gratefully at her.

"Well, at least some of us are escaping this wedding madness." She said wryly. I almost said something about it being one more reason never marry, but I looked at Tristan and held my tongue.

"Stupid. That's what you are. The Romans are gone and the land's being carved up and given away…" Bors said while crossing his arms. "They'll be begging us brave knights to come rule them and eat their food!"

"Gods help us the day you become the lord of anything." I said morbidly. He mumbled something and I grinned.

"Be safe." Dagonet said while squeezing my calf. I was surprised as he pulled me over and embraced me. I decided it was time to leave. I had said too many goodbyes over the past few days. We said farewell and rode out the gates towards the south.


LALALA! Ok ok… fine have it your way… I'm keeping her relationship with Marchy poo short. Review!