Forever Yours

Chapter Three

That memory was one of the only ones I had left. All the other ones seem like a blur. A blur to soon be forgotten too. I know I won't remember, and right now, I'm really not sure if I want to remember. He is what I wan't, not the memories, not this pain, not the reason. No. That's not true. I do want the reason, no matter how much I hate it. Ronald Weasley was the reason. Its hard to understand, though. I know I said I hate Ron, but I don't, not really. If I hated Ron, I would hate my baby too. And I don't hate my baby. The only thing I hate is the fact that the baby isn't the child of the man I do love. Its the child of the man that hurt me most.

I love knowing that soon I will be a mother. I love knowing that soon there will be someone who loves me. I guess the baby will, I mean, what child doesn't love their mother? Actually some children grow to hate their mothers. I'm sure that my baby won't hate me, at least it won't until I tell it I'm the reason it doesn't have a father.

I thought about it a lot, and the same thing worry me. Will I be a bad mother? Will my baby hate me? Will I be the reason my child is never happy? All possibilities, and so far, all these question point to the same answer: yes. I will be a bad mother. I do not deserve a baby, a small human who needs care from a real mother, not some teenager that got knocked-up. My baby will hate me, even if it takes years for it to hate me. I know nothing of motherhood. I would probably drop the baby, or not feed it enough, of suffocate it in my unhappiness. I would be the reason my baby is not happy. What can I offer it? I can't give it a father. I have no food, no shelter, no money, and no one will help me out.

My parents told me never to come back as soon as I told them I was pregnant, and I was alone. I remember that memory so clearly. And I'm sure, that that one, I will never forget...

flashback

"Hey, mum" Hermione said, embracing her mother. Hermione had just got back from Hogwarts for the Winter Holidays. She hadn't been sure that she was going home, but because of the certain circumstances, she did. She needed to tell them.

"Hey, daddy." Hermione said, smiling. She moved from her mother and hugged her father. "Hermione! Its such a suprise! I was thinking you weren't going to make it. According to your letters, you wanted to stay at Hogwarts a bit longer for studying." Her father said, and Hermione knew that he wanted the reason as to why she was home.

"Oh, well, yes, I was going to stay, father, but I decided not to. I have some news for you and mum, but it can wait. I want you guys to tell me about you trip!" Hermione said to her father. Her father smiled. "Well, it doesn't matter why your here, what matters is that your here!" He took her hands and led her to the couch. He sat in the arm chair and her mother sat on the couch beside Hermione.

"Hermione, dear, are you hungry? I know that that food at school can't possibly be as good as mine," Helen Granger told her daughter, placing a hand on her daughter's. "Or as healthy." David Granger added. Hermione smiled at her father. David Granger had always been more strict about the teeth thing than Helen Granger.

Helen, like Hermione, had brown, untidy, hair, with a few gray hairs here and there. It was short, but was a pain to keep nice. Her eyes were the color of the ocean at night. Her eyes sparkled like Dumbledore's did, only, she had less joy than Dumbledore certainly had, after all he was the one that liked lemon drops.

David Granger who, like Hermione, had inherited the small gene, for a man he was small, anyway. No, he wasn't smaller than Helen or Hermione, but he was certainly shorter than about 70 of the male population in his area. His hair was short and blond with gray hairs covering 50 of his head, and it was very neat. His eyes were big and brown, the color of chocolate. His teeth were clean and straight, though it appeared that his back tooth was nearly falling out, a fate that eventually comes with old age. No, David was not old, well, not that old.

He was in his early fifties and Helen, in her middle fourties, but I won't say no more than that. You know how people get about their ages.

"No, mum. The food the serve at Hogwarts is not as good as yours, but it is filling, and for the most part, healthy. I'm full though, so," Hermione tried to say, but her mother cut her off with a gesture of her hand.

"Nonsense, Hermione. You must be starving. I'll make you some vegetables, and some salad, oh, and some, I know I shouldn't make this, but, meatballs!" Helen rushed off the couch and into the kitchen. Hermione's eyes were wide. Her mother was never this happy. Hermione looked to her father, who was smiling. "She is just happy that her baby is home." He told her, and she smiled at the mention of her being the baby. She loved that. Her mother used to tell her that, that no matter how old she was, she was still her little baby.

Hermione set the table, and Helen put out the food. Apparently, Helen had decided to make much more than she had said she would. "Wow," her father said, getting his knife and fork in his hands, "you two better make sure you brush really good tonight, and don't forget about your tongue, Hermione."

Hermione blushed at this. She was really lucky her friends weren't there. Hermione had hated brushing her tongue, too, because she couldn't stand the burning. Weird how parents always remember the most embarrassing moments.

Hermione started to eat. "So, Hermione," her mother said, swallowing the food in her mouth, "there was something you wanted to tell us?"

Hermione almost forgot. She didn't want to tell them, but they were her parents and it would be much more worst if she didn't tell them then and there. "Well, its something big, and I don't think you'll like the news very much." Hermione told the, putting her fork down.

"Come on, Hermione. You know will be happy, I mean its you." David Granger told her. She smiled. "Promise you won't get mad." Hermione told them. Hermione may have smiled, but she was still nervous.

Helen Granger started to look worried. "Of course, Hermione, now, what is it?" Her mother was always impatient when she thought something was wrong. Her father and mother stared at her.

"Well, mum, dad, I'm pregnant." Hermione said, only to be replied by the look of terror on her parents faces. "Are you getting an abortion?" Helen asked her, in a very harsh voice. "No, mum, I'm keeping it." Hermione said, worried. She knew her parents would practically die at the new, but what she found was strange; she was the one dying at the news. "Where's the father? Is he helping?" David asked, not looking at his daughter. Hermione shook her head. "No, he is not."

Helen stood up and pointed to the door. "Get out! Get out of my house, and never come back!" Hermione nearly cried, her eyes filled with tears. She turned to her father, who was starring at the floor, and didn't say anything. "Daddy?" Hermione tried. Without looking at Hermione, David said, "Leave."

Hermione stared in horror at her parents. She stood from her chair and ran out the door.

end of flashback

Yes, that was a painful memory. I still couldn't believe what happened. I tried to owl them every time I think of them, but that memory always comes flooding back to me, and I'm sure they don't want to talk to me.

The father wasn't going to help. I didn't want Ron to know, and if I wanted Ron to be happy why would I say, 'Oh, and by the way, your the father of my baby.' No, I couldn't say that. I couldn't do that to Ron, though I came close to it one night...

flashback

"Hey, Ron, later on, if your not busy, can you come by the Head's Dorm? There is something I need to tell you." Hermione told him as she was leaving the Great Hall for Transfiguration. "Sure, Hermione, I'll be there at about eight." Ron told her, smiling. Hermione smiled back.

Hermione left the Great Hall.

A knock came from the door and Hermione stopped her pacing. She ran over to the door, but stooped before she opened it. She was nervous. She couldn't do this, but she had to. She opened the door, and in walked Ron, and Luna. Luna? She asked herself. Why did Ron bring her?

"Hey, Hermione." Ron said, sitting on the couch, Luna following right after him. "We have great news you need to hear, but you had something to say, too?" Ron folded his hands. Hermione sat on the armchair. "No," Hermione said, stalling some time, "you go first."

Ron and Luna smiled. "Well," Luna started, but Ron finished to excited to wait, "were getting married!" Hermione was shocked out of her mind.

"Was there something you needed to tell us, Hermione?" Luna asked. Hermione shook her head. "No, I wanted to know if you would join S.P.E.W. I'm starting it again."

end of flashback

Yes, I did try, though I didn't succeed. Ron was happy with Luna, and getting married. How could I ruin that?

Harry, I did asks Harry for money, and for help, and he probably would have given it to me, if it wasn't for Ginny. Ginny wasn't mean, but like me, she didn't want hurt and told me never to tell Ron about it, not that I was going to. Harry had a hard time understanding how it was Ron's baby, yet, I was dating Draco. When I told him I cheated on Draco with Ron, Ginny started calling me horrible names, and Harry followed, not wanted to upset Ginny.

I could ask Mr. and Mrs. Weasley, but what money would they have? Though, I'm sure Mrs. Weasley would help me. Besides, it wasn't just that they couldn't help me financially, it was, if they knew, they would tell all of Ron's brothers and order members. I couldn't live with that.

So here I am alone, and in pain. Right now, the only adult that knows about the baby is Madam Pomfrey. She has been checking on me since the night I went to her. After not having my period two weeks before the due date, I had to do something. She told me that I was pregnant and I asked her not to tell no one.

I'm fine so far. I can take the pain, the hate, I can take all of it, because in a few months, my baby will give me what all those people used to give me: love.

A/N: Tell me how it is. Also, please tell me if I'm doing the flashbacks ok. Review! Also, I put the flashbacks in third person because its easier to tell what's going on when it in third person.