We know what's going on with everyone's favorite Phantom, so now it's time to realize that if the Phantom characters are singing No One Mourns the Wicked/Phantom, then what are the Wicked characters doing? Yup, you got it. The Midwife and Frex are trying to auction off Elphaba's Grimmery.
Chapter II: Flashback-Prone Auctions
"Sold! Your number, Sir? Thank you," said Frex, father of the infamous Wicked Witch of the West, who was in charge of auctioning off the remnants of the items left in the long-forsaken Shiz University. What used to be a grand college was now abandoned ruins infested with rats and cobwebs. In fact, the only room that was still standing was the cafetorium, where the auction was being held. "Lot 665, then, ladies and gentlemen, a really old boring textbook-looking thing that smells like cereal."
"Showing here," added the Midwife, showing off the Grimmery, and then opening it up, only to have her head engulfed by a cloud of dust and begin coughing her head off. After a short time, she began to suffer an allergy attack and fainted on the spot.
"Starting at fifteen Emeraldz," continued Frex.
"Shouldn't we do something about the Midwife?" Asked Madame Morrible.
"Naw. The Guy with a Cart Full of Dead Bodies and a Heavy British Accent will pick her up when he comes by on Thursday." Everyone took this as an acceptable answer, and the Grimmery was eventually auctioned off for thirty Emeraldz to Glinda, the Witch de South. After Lot 665, everyone decides to have a five-minute break, and the elderly witch goes off to the side so that she can sing to the textbook without anyone noticing that she is attempting communication with inanimate objects.
"A collector's book, indeed
Every detail exactly as she said…
She often spoke of you, my friend
Your illegible spells that never seem to work and ended up turning Fiyero into straw
And your stench of cereal
Will your spells work when all the rest of us have been killed off/are missing due to a variety of reasons…"
By the time she was finished, the auction was back in session. "Lot 666, a broom in pieces. Some of you may recall the strange affair of the Wicked Witch of the West, a mystery never fully explained. We are told, ladies and gentlemen, that this is the exact broom that figured in the famous disaster. Our workshops have repaired it, and wired parts of it for the new electric microwave, so that you can fix nutritional snacks whilst cleaning up the house." He gestured to the broom, which was on a stand, covered. "Gentlemen?"
The moment he spoke, the broom shot up from under its cover, and proceeded to shoot straight to the ceiling. A cackle that seemed to come from everywhere at once echoed around the room, and the place was thrown into Flashback Mode. The trademark cackle continued into an all-out Evil Laugh, and Shiz University seemed to come back to life. The tables in the Cafetorium were pushed to the sides, leaving room for a rehearsal in progress. The fluorescent lights came on in a wave, and finally, students at the University entered and took their places in rehearsal.
Fiyero's POV
"This trophy from our saviors from the enslaving force of Rome!" Announced Boq, at the top of his lungs and brandishing a fake decapitated head. What should have taken about five seconds to sing took about five hours because of all his unnecessary cadenzas. When he was quite finished, the rest of us in the guy's chorus broke into song.
"With feasting and dancing and song..."
Then the dudettes' chorus took over.
"The trumpets ... Hannibal comes!"
Then that one chick in the wheelchair came in a quavered, "Sad to return to find the land we love
Threatened once more by Rome's far-reaching grasp."
Or at least, that's what I assume she said, as that Nessa chick isn't exactly the best singer in the café. Or, for that matter, the loudest tuba in the jazz band. And I wasn't the only one who couldn't hear her (though I probably was the only one making up all these random analogies); Professor Reyer was just about to get all lectury about stage voices versus choir voices or whatever (hey, it's not like I actually listen to his lectures), when the Headmistress interrupted. She just came waltzing through the middle of the stage, and you could tell it was seriously annoying Reyer. Following her was a Goat, a guy in a tacky plaid tie, and a chick in pink who seemed oddly familiar.
"Now that I have your attention, ya hooligans," began our partially deaf headmistress, "I would like to make an announcement. I have finally taken my own advice, and am retiring. You kids've stolen my walking stick one too many times. These are your new headmasters, Dr. Dillamond and the Wizard." She gestured to the Goat and the guy with the tie.
Avaric, one of my friends, who had slipped away during rehearsal, was back. He tossed me an orange soda he had nicked while and said, "Hey, Fiyero, did Lefévre just say our new headmasters are a Goat and a guy named 'the Wizard'?"
"Yah. What's up with that?" I asked.
He shrugged as we got back into position and rehearsal resumed. "Shiz is a screwed up place." We had to quit talking when the chorus began again.
"Bid welcome ... Hannibal comes!"
We held out the last note to its proper length, but the moment it was over, chaos reigned. All of my friends drifted over to Avaric and me to drink our soda while Reyer attempted to get Lefévre out of the cafetorium, or at least off of the stage.
"Is she new?" I asked, referring to the obviously Gillikin girl dressed in pink.
"Heck if I know," replied Avaric. "Why?"
"She seems familiar, that's all."
"Her name's Galinda," he told me.
"How do you know?"
"Because Lefévre just introduced her to Reyer, that's how."
"Right." I remembered her now; we were friends as kids. But that was a really long time ago, and I doubted she remembered me. I started to space out for a moment, reminiscing.
"Yo, Fiyero, snap out of it, dude! Boq's throwing another hissy!"
"What?" I said automatically, then turned to see Boq a few yards away threatening to quit the musical, as always. I wondered what would happen if he actually did. Lefévre had left the new headmasters to deal with him, and they were currently doing some major sucking up. Finally, they convinced Boq to do his solo, which was his intent in the first place. It was kind of funny how the Munchkin always had to be the center of attention.
"Think of me, think of me fondly..." Etc, we all know the rest, until,
"When you find that once again you long to take your-"
He stopped singing, probably due to the fact that a blood-curdling scream was coming from his mouth. And the scream was probably due to the fact that someone had just distributed a backdrop on his head, and he was currently pinned to the ground on his stomach. This was too much. We all couldn't help but burst out laughing, while Avaric captured the priceless moment on tape with his video camera.
Then Boq began to throw another hissy. But what shocked us was when he actually did leave, this time.
"Professor Reyer, who is the understudy for Boq's role?" asked Dr. Dillamond, the Goat.
"We don't have an understudy; the production is new."
That was a pretty bad excuse, if you ask me, and the headmasters did not take the lack of a star very lightly. They started yelling about having to refund a full house, and using some colorful language that they would probably regret using in front of all of us, later.
"Someone needs to tell them that we're just a college doing a musical, and that tickets are four bucks apiece," Avaric muttered.
Morrible got an evil grin on her face. This started to freak me out, as she absolutely hates me, and she only grins like that when she's about to do something evil to me. (Hence, evil grin). "Fiyero could sing it, Sir." She suggested.
"What, the chorus boy?" asked The Wizard.
"No, the other Fiyero," she said sarcastically. "Of course I mean the chorus boy! He's been well taught."
"Well, come on then. From the beginning of the aria."
I swear, that guy's fake Winkie accent was starting to get on my nerves. And who says "aria," anyway? Glaring daggers at Morrible, I went up to the mike, and hoped I wasn't about to make a fool of myself.
A/N: Thank you to all of my reviewers! I hope you liked this chapter from Fiyero's point of view! Sorry this took so long for me to post, but my stupid muse was hibernating or something, because I have been inspiration-less for days. Bad Scorn Ayesha Malky:Attempts inflict pain upon a certain Siamese cat muse, but fails, as my muse kind of lives in my brain: Yah, I'm okay.
BTW: Emeraldz are Ozian currency. Why? Because I say so. So there. But anyway, please review! I promise the next chapter will be up sooner, now that I know what I'm going to do (MWAHAHAHAHA!)
Nota Lone: Thanks for reviewing and reading my insanity!
TheGreatSporkWeilder: So happy you like it! (I love your pen name, by the way! Sporks and penguins rock! Don't ask where the penguins came from)
BroadwayUnderstudy13: Yay! Omg, Azriel, you're on FFN! Quite a bit different than the original version that I wrote backwards in my notebook, isn't it?
PhantomoftheIcoplex: Thanks for the review! I'm glad you liked it!
