Don't Dwell in the Past
"Absolutely not!" Krantz screamed. We were in his office. I told him about my vision and where my kids were and that I was going to them. Why I did such a stupid thing, I do not know. I shouldn't have told him that I was going. I really shouldn't have. Then I wouldn't have him yelling at me. Why did I get myself into this mess?
"Why?" I asked. Krantz just seemed to get even more pissed off. Why is he getting mad at me? Its not like his kids are missing and have been kidnapped. Come to think of it, he doesn't even have kids!
"Because Jessica," he stated, "if you get hurt by these people, then it will be worse than the original situation."
"But these are my kids, Dr. K," I said calmer than I felt, "I need to get to them. I need to find them."
"I understand Jessica, but we need a plan," Krantz said. He looked stressed out. Pfft. He was stressed out? Wow, he should take a good look at me. I'm having a nervous breakdown. I may not sound like it, but inside I'm crumbling under all the stress.
"Well, we better hurry up then!" I shouted.
To say Krantz looked surprised would be a major understatement. He looked way taken aback by my outburst.
"Jessica! Kindly do not shout at me! I'm trying the best I can. I know you are stressed out and nervous and anxious, but please do not take it out on me."
I sighed, "I'm sorry, Dr. K, but I really need to get to them."
He looked me in the eye, "I know Jess, I know. We'll get to them as soon as possible."
"Thank you," I whispered. Then I felt the tears prickling at the back of my eyes. Why now?
Then I felt a hand on my shoulder. I wiped the tears away and looked up to see who it was.
It was Kara.
"Jess, don't worry. We'll find them," she said consolingly. That just made me cry more. How much she cared, I mean.
"Jess, Krantz just went to talk to some other agents. He said he's be back in a little bit after he discusses a plan with them," she explained.
I nodded to show her that I was listening and understood.
"Jess, listen, I'm really sorry about all of this. I can't believe this really happened," she started, "but I talked to Dr. K, and I suggested that we start up a little day care center in the building for all of the agents to keep their smaller children while they work."
I nodded.
"Is that a good idea to you?" she inquired.
"Yeah," I croaked out.
"Okay, well Krantz thought it was a good idea, so as soon as we find your kids, we'll start it up. First, we'll have to find some good care givers, but as soon as we've done that, we'll let your kids in first. It'll be free, so no need to pay it. Krantz said the company'll pay for it."
"Okay."
"Oh, and we're going to start painting the extra office tomorrow, you know, for the kids. What color do you think would be good?"
I shrugged.
"Come on Jess, don't just sit there like a blob. Talk to me. Yell at me. I really don't care. I just need to know that you're alive."
I nodded again.
"Kara," I stopped.
"Yes?"
"Okay, I think yellow would be a great color. Like a light, sun yellow."
"Sounds great to me."
"Yeah," was my stunning response.
"So..." she trailed off.
"Look, Kara, I don't really feel like talking right now."
She nodded, "I understand."
And then Krantz walked in.
"Jessica, we've come up with an elaborate plan."
"And..."
"We're putting it into action immediately."
"Finally!" I yelled.
"Go get your stuff. We're leaving in two minutes," he said.
I ran out the door and into my office. I grabbed my belt with my gun on it and everything and put it on. Then I ran out the door and back into Krantz's office.
I followed him into the van, along with a few other agents and Kara and Steph.
Krantz told me the plan. Wasn't really all that great, but for an I-just-came-up-with-this-in-two-minutes plan, it wasn't that bad. I was to go in, quietly, and look around. And when I've found my kids, or someone tries to grab me, I press a little button on my belt and they come storming in to get me. Sounds great, right? Eh, not the greatest, but it'll do. I have a feeling these are amateurs we are dealing with.
101-
Okay, so we arrived at the place that was in my vision.
And boy were these people gonna pay.
They were keeping my kids in an old run-down shack. It was disgusting! Ita appalling how little some people think about the safety of children. Fucking assholes.
"Jessica, are you ready?" Dr. K asked me.
I nodded, "uh huh," and I put on my trench coat to cover up y gun and crap. Then I let down my hair. Uh, just not in a rupunzel (sp?) way or anything.
"You know what to do," he said to me before I took off.
I casually walked down the gravel path. When I reached the door. I quickly looked around to see if anyone was around - well, besides Krantz and the other agents, of course. When the cost was clear, I slowly opened the door and stepped in.
Man, it was completely dark in there. It was pitch black. How the hell are you supposed to see?
I remembered from my vision that they were being kept in one of the rooms upstairs. So, I carefully climbed up the stairs, trying not to make a sound. I got to the second to last step, when it creaked. Crreeeaaakkk.
I stayed still for a minute, and when no one came yelling or anything, I continued walking.
I got to the top a few seconds later. I then looked around to see if the cost was clear, yet again.
It was and I proceeded to the second door on the left. I reached it and slowly opened it.
The first thing I saw was a cage. Then I saw a little boy and girl inside of there. What kind of sick people are they? Keeping little children in cages? Fucking bastards.
I looked around and saw no one. So I went in. That was a mistake. My kids noticed me right away and screamed, "Mommy!" in unison, which woke up whatever guard that was in the corner - the one I hadn't noticed.
"Hey!" he yelled, "who are you?"
I looked at him and smiled - a fake one, obviously - then replied with this, "Oh, sorry to startle you sir, but I was called from one of your other men. He told me to take the children to a new location. He said the feds were on our trail and we needed to get them out immediately."
I saw his eyes widen and the he spoke, "Jesus Christ! Ok, well take them. I'll go get the other men. We'll be there in a minute." He threw me the key to the cage. Ha, naive son of a bitch.
I quickly opened the cage and grabbed them, "Take your time," I yelled to the guy, "I'll be waiting."
Then, with my kids in my arms, I ran as fast as I could down the stairs and out the door.
I ran to the van and shoved Autumn and Aaron into the van.
"Wow, you got them that fast?" asked one of the other agents - whose name was John.
"Yeah, those guys were so naive. Um, they should be together somewhere in there, so go get 'em," I said.
Five of the other agents, including John, ran out of the van, armed with weapons, and went in there and busted down the door. I heard a little commotion and then John came out a few minutes later. They had about five men cuffed.
One of them screamed, "She tricked me! Stupid bitch!"
I laughed silently to myself. Kara and Steph were sitting with me in the back of the van. They were cooing at my kids. Yeah, they are adorable, I know.
101-
"Hey, uh, would you guys mind staying at my apartment tonight?" I aksed Kara and Steph.
They both smiled.
"Of course, Jess," Kara said, "but only if I can bring my boyfriend."
I rolled my eyes. "Fine, you can bring Bryan over. As long as you guys aren't doing anything not fit for children's eyes."
Kara just laughed at me, "No, Jess. We would never thing of doing that in your apartment."
I laughed. "Yeah, okay. Just gt your stuff and come over. I'll try and bake some cookies or something."
"Hey, you mind if I bring my boyfriend too?" Steph asked.
"Of course not! I haven't seen Jake in a while anyway," I replied.
"You know, Jess, Jake has a really cute friend who I think you'd be interested in," Steph said.
"No, I told you guys. I'm fine without men in my life right now. I still haven't fully recovered after what happened to me. And plus, I'm sure Jake's friend isn't into relationship commitment, let alone being a father figure."
"Yeah, I guess you're right about that," she said.
"Uh huh," I said, "now go get your stuff and come over."
"Okay, Jess," Kara replied sarcastically.
"Wait, you guys have the keys, right?" I asked. I gave them keys to my apartment a while ago. You know, just so I don't have to get up and open the door, they can let themselves in.
"Yeah, we're good," Kara said, while they both flashed me their keys on their keyrings.
"Okay, then see ya later," I said and waved goodbye.
I walked out of the FBI building with my kids and waved down a cab.
"Where to?" the guy asked. I gave him my address and just sat back for the fifteen minute ride.
"Okay," the man said. I got out with my kids and took the elevator up.
"You guys need a bath, don't you?" I asked my kids. They looked pretty filthy. I mean, they haven't taken a bath in a little while, you know, having being kidnapped and all.
They both nodded their heads. So, I threw a pizza in the oven and then took them to the bathroom.
I started the water and went into their room to get their pajamas. I walked back into the bathroom and let them take their clothes off and get into the bathtub.
Aaron got in first. Then Autumn got in. She jumped back up in shock.
"What is it, honey?" I asked her.
She pouted, "It's hot mommy!"
"Autumn, its fine. Look, Aaron's fine. Is it hot, Aaron?" He shook his head. Autumn looked at me and then slowly got in.
I let them wash themselves. I think almost-five year olds can take baths by themselves, just with supervision.
I was reading the newspaper, when Autumn spoke.
"Mommy?"
"Hmm?"
"I'm glad you came to save us."
"Me too sweetie, me too." I would've hugged her, but she was soaking wet from being in the tub. But I did give her a kiss on the top of her head.
"You guys all done?" I asked them.
"Mm hmm," they said in unison.
"Okay," I handed them towels to wrap themselves in and then their clothes. They walked out and went to change.
I walked back into the kitchen and took the pizza out. It was perfectly done. Mmm, haven't had pizza in a while. Trying to watch the carbs.
"Knock, knock," I heard from the door to my apartment. In walked Kara, Steph, Jake, and Bryan.
"Hey guys," I smiled.
"Hey yourself," Kara said.
"Okay, well make yourselves comfy. I just made a pizza. But I guess I'll ahve to put another one in for you guys."
"Don't bother, we already ate." Steph intervened.
"Alrighty then," I said, "I'll be right back."
I walked into the kids' room.
"You guys all ready for bed?"
Autumn pouted again. "No, why can't we go watch movies and stuff with you guys?"
"Because, honey, we are going to do grown-up stuff," I answered her, "but I promise another night you guys can hang out with us." I kissed her forehead and then Aaron's.
"Go to bed," I whispered and then turned out their light.
I walked back into the kitchen and grabbed a few cokes for us.
I walked into the lounge and put the cokes on the coffee table.
Kara looked at me questioningly, "Cokes? Jess, you know us better than that."
I rolled my eyes and went and got some beers instead.
"That better?"
"Much better."
"So," Kara started, "what's up, Jess?"
"Nothing really, I just wanted company tonight. You know, after what happened."
"Understandable," Kara said and took a swig of her beer.
There was a few moments silence, but then Jake broke it.
"So, Jess, I was thinking, since you have no boyfriend," gee, rub it in ehy don't you, "maybe you'd like to go out with my friend."
"I already told Steph no. I'm not ready for another relationship yet, not after what I went through," I explained.
"Jess, you always refuse these things. Its been five years, Jess," Kara said exasperatedly.
"I know Kara, but I still haven't gotten over it. If you knew what I went through, then you'd understand."
"Then tell us, so we can understand."
I sighed, and said, "Fine."
"Well, I guess I should start at the very beginning."
"Yeah..." Kara said, urging me to go on.
"Well, when I was in high school, I was always getting into trouble. Mostly because people would just piss me off and I'd punch them. And then I'd get sent to detention for it. Well, one day I was in detention, and the teacher supervising told be to sit between these two guys, because I was the only girl and she said something about woman power or something. So, I did. One of the guys was really hot. We kept writing notes to eachother and stuff and then he asked me out.
"So, I went out with him. He didn't know that I was 2 years younger than him at the time though. And when he found out he was pretty angry that I hadn't told him, but, honestly, I didn't know it really mattered. But he told me why it did matter. He said he was on probation and if his probation officer caught him with me, he's be in trouble.
"So, for a few months, we kept our relationship a secret. Occasionally, I'd get into some major trouble and he'd be there to help me out of it. Like that time with the true Americans and this chold-abuser step-father. And, you know what, I was really falling for him, really hard. And I couldn't help it.
"Well, after the True Americans thing, he got hit on the back of the head with a mashed-potato bowl and was unconscious for a while. But they took him to the hospital and that was where I told my parents about us going out. Yeah, they freaked, but whatever. That was when he told me that he liked me too much.
"Everything was going fine until I was eighteen and we decided we both wanted to have sex. So, we did –"
Kara interrupted me, "Wait, was that the time that got you pregnant?"
"Yeah it was.
"Anywho, as I was saying, we had sex and I got pregnant.
"Well, I found out one day, but I wasn't to see Rob until that Saturday. And then that Friday I had to work at this church for community service because I punched this bitch in the face and broke her nose.
"I was partnered with this really pretty girl, who was new in town. Well, I went away for a few minutes to get a few boxes from downstairs. And when I came back up, I saw Rob kissing the girl. She had her arms around his neck and was getting really into it. Rob pulled away as soon as he saw me, but I ran away.
"He shouted my name a few times, but I just ran away. I called up Krantz and told him I had to get away fast. He offered me this job and here I am today."
Kara came over and hugged me, "Oh, Jess, I'm soo sorry. I had no idea."
For some reason, now that I had gotten that off my chest, I felt a lot better. Not enoguh to date again, but I felt so much better.
"Thanks, K, really, I'm glad that someone was listening to me. I guess I just really needed to get that off my chest."
We talked a bit more that night, about some other junk I don't really remember. But, after spilling my guts to my best friends, I feel like a better person than I was. And no, I didn't make those cookies after all.
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Disclaimer: All of the characters you recognize belong to Meg Cabot, the ultimate writer of our time. All of the other characters you don't recognize, and the plot, belong to me.