A/N: Here's Robin's opinion on what happens after the first chapter. If there will be a third chapter, it will be Raven's opinion about everything which I probably will write at some point. Normally I'd write review responses but I put those in my other story I wrote because I didn't know if I would write another chapter for his one so they can be found there. This chapter might be a little sappy and may only make half sense without Raven's side of it so that will be why I'll write that sometime. On a negative note, I didn't get the job I was supposed to so I am extraordinarily pissed right now though it does mean I can write more. However I will rant right now. Bleeping pieces of Bleep. How the bleep did you not give me that Bleepin job. You think I was bleeping too confident in my interview. That's your bleeping excuse for not hiring me? Bleep you. I'm bleeping sorry for not being a sniveling, nervous, twitching freak in my interview. I'm sorry I have bleeping confidence is my abilities. Bleep the bleeping bleeps. Well that's it. I'm out.

Disclaimer: I don't own the Teen Titans so lets not try and sue me since I don't have anything to sue for.

Afraid to Lose Again

Chapter 2

By: Finalitylife

This shouldn't have happened. It shouldn't have gone this far. Why did I have to be weak? Why did I have to let her see me being weak? Somewhere deep inside my mind, I can hear my darker side laughing at me and though I want to deny the truth, it becomes harder and harder to do so. She pitied me. That could be the only explanation for this. She felt bad for me, nothing more. She didn't love me. After everyone I've failed, no one could ever love me like that. I turn around slowly and can't help but lose my breath when I stare at her sleeping form. The sheets only come up to her waste, revealing plenty of beautiful, naked skin though my eyes are drawn to her face more than they are to her flesh. Her eyes are closed and she has the most peaceful look on her face as she breathes ever so slowly. I'm not sure how I managed to get out of bed without waking her but I guess all those years of stealth training did apply more than to just sneaking up on criminals. I can't help but smile at her form. She really is some type of ethereal goddess.

I realized that today was still the day of the anniversary of my parent's death as it was only a few hours after Raven had comforted me in my misery in the main room. It had become my custom since becoming Robin to every midnight at the start of the day of this anniversary to talk to them, bare my soul to them as their son Richard, not as the unstoppable superhero that I had become. I would tell them of all my problems, all my pain, hoping for forgiveness, hoping for peace. Over the years since I had become a Titan, the talks had become filled more with guilt over my mistakes than anything else, guilt that was slowly consuming every waking thought I had, as well as those when I slept. It had only grown worse with Slade's return, with his focus shifting over from me to Raven. I'm not quite exactly sure when I started having feelings for the resident dark bird but it was about the same time that I realized my feelings toward Starfire were nothing but a silly crush. Starfire was sweet, gentle, lovable and very beautiful but I realized she wasn't for me. I had gone over all the reasons in my head for a long time why it wouldn't work and as was my obsessive nature, went threw every possible scenario that could occur if we were together. All of them ended with us deciding to be friends or her leaving me because I was starting to scare her with the darkness that lurked within me. I knew it was for the best that we would never be together.

Raven was something all together completely different that Starfire. She, in my opinion, was far more beautiful than Starfire. She was smart, funny, and deep. Of course the thing I think I liked most about her is that we could spend hours in silence reading and never once feel uncomfortable. To be able to do that with someone was rare and I truly enjoyed it. Over time, me and her developed a quiet relationship, never really prying into each others business but talking about one thing or another. My feelings only continued to deepen for her and on the day she saved me from myself, I knew that I truly loved her more than anyone I had ever met outside my parents. I always said I was going to tell her how I felt but it just seemed like I never had the opportunity. With all the problems with Brother Blood and now the return of Slade, the perfect moment never came up. I cringed as Slade's name passed threw my mind again. God how I hated that monster. I still remembered seeing Raven falling after Slade threw her off that building, her clothes torn from her body, completely helpless. Though I saved her from the fall, I knew that I had still failed her. She had chosen me to release from the Time Stop that she created, she had chosen me to protect her, and I failed her completely. I knew I was not worthy of someone as perfect as her and that was what was making me almost sick right now.

She had somehow heard me talking in the main room. I don't know how much she heard but all I know is that she embraced me as I cried, never once asking me to stop, never once judging me. She simply held me in silence, comforting me with her presence, and the warmth of her body. I don't know how long we stood there but eventually I turned to her when I sensed she was growing tired. I had been right and noticed her eyes were indeed sleepy looking. I don't even think she noticed my unmasked eyes at that moment. I gently picked her up and carried her back to her room to her bed. It was the least I could do for her at that moment. I remember entering into her room and gently depositing her on her bed. It was what happened next that shocked me. As I turned to walk away she grabbed hold of my arm tightly. I remember meeting her gaze as I turned to her, staring deeply into her eyes. She smiled warmly at me and told me that I had the most beautiful eyes she had ever seen. I smiled at her in response and told her that mine were nothing compared to hers. I remember her blushing slightly at my comment. It was hard to imagine Raven blushing but there she was, blushing at one of my corny comments. Exactly what happened next is a little foggy. Common sense and all forms of logic left me and I remember leaning down and capturing her lips in a kiss. I was shocked when she immediately returned it. At that moment, I felt so much passion, so much love for the girl who was soon lying underneath me. Eventually all clothes were tossed aside and we came together completely. It was the single greatest moment of my life, to be with a person who I truly loved like that.

It wasn't until I woke up that reality finally came back to me. I quietly wondered if it was a dream but that was quickly revealed to be wrong as I felt a small, warm body pressed against my chest. My eyes found Raven, still naked, beside me. It only took a few seconds for me to figure out just how wrong this situation was. I managed to get myself free from her and that was where I still stood, off to the side of her bed watching her sleep. It made me sick that I took advantage of her when all she was trying to do was make me feel better, make her friend feel better. She was trying to help me and I turned that action into something perverted, something twisted. Worst of all, she had given her first time to me, she had given her innocence to me and I had greedily accepted it. I had taken something I had to right to take from her when all she did was pity me and want to make me feel better. I was completely disgusted with myself.

I watch as Raven started moving slightly in her sleep, reaching out to her side where I would have been. When she came up empty, her eyes began to flutter open, though very slowly. Eventually they opened completely and she looked at the empty side of the bed with emotions in her eyes I could not recognize. Probably sensing my presence in the room still, she sat up pulling the sheets up to cover her chest and looked around the room. Her eyes eventually settled on me as I remained in my spot. Her voice came out quiet and very tentative.

"Richard…." My eyes widened for a few seconds but eventually formed into a type of half glare. My voice came out slightly angry and far colder than I wanted.

"Who told you my name?" She seemed to cower at the sound of my voice and I instantly felt ashamed of myself even more. She lowered her head slightly as she spoke.

"You…it was you. You told me to call you Richard when…when we were together earlier." My mind froze. Did I really say that? My mind was so filled with emotion of all types when everything happened. I went from such sadness to such peacefulness to such happiness. It all happened so fast that I just couldn't comprehend it all.

"I'm sorry Raven. I shouldn't have talked to you like that. Its just that a lot has happened and I'm still dealing with it all." Her gaze came back to me and her eyes held a quiet warmth that I could feel affecting me.

"Its okay." She seemed to study me for a second before she decided to ask me something, though she could not look at me as she asked.

"I need to know something Robin. I need to know the truth. I need to know if you really love me. I need to know if what you said before was true." The question caused me to stop breathing. She definitely must have heard me talking about her. She knew how I felt, she knew that I was deeply in love with her. My mind went completely blank as she turned to look at me. Her eyes were soft and so hopeful, waiting for my response. They were not the eyes of someone who pitied me before, they were not the eyes of someone who regretted anything that happened, they were not the eyes of someone who was disgusted with me. These were the eyes of someone who so badly wanted me to say yes to her question. I tired to speak words but sound refused to come out. I could only stare at this wonderfully beautiful girl in front of me with wide eyes. After a few seconds without a response her face became very sad and she looked away in shame.

"I see. If that's the case please leave my room. All this never happened. I won't say anything." My mind was still trying to catch up with the situation. Her tiny body began to shake every so slightly and I knew she was trying to repress tears. I finally managed to get a word out though it came out more as a desperate yell.

"Wait!" I was still trying to take all this in. If I didn't know any better, Raven was acting like someone who had just been turned down by someone they loved. Raven thought she had been turned down by me. The correlation was so simple but my mind didn't want to put it all together. It was at this moment that I simply went with my instincts and walked forward toward the bed and wrapped my arms around Raven who was looking at me with eyes that looked like they were ready to burst with water any second.

"Please don't cry Raven. Please don't cry my beautiful, little bird. I love you Raven. I love you more than anything else in this world." Raven buried her head into my chest as she returned my hug. I could feel her small arms wrap around me and I felt so warm, so happy at that exact moment. I small smile formed on my face.

"I love you even more than my motorcycle." I could feel her grip tighten more around me and I could hear her trying to repress a laugh which only made me smile more. She started talking into my chest, trying not to give me the satisfaction that I made her laugh with a stupid joke.

"You are aware just how inappropriate that was."

"Yes, but my great sense of humor is one of the reasons you love me." I stopped completely after I said those words. She had never said she loved me. She pushed back so she could look at my face. I think she saw the doubt, the fear in my eyes at that moment. I felt her lips gently press against mine and she pulled back slowly with a smile.

"Yes, just one of the many reasons that I love you." I felt my whole body, mind, and soul relax at those words. "and I'm never going to leave your side Richard, not now, not ever."