"Mmm…Marissa?" Ryan tried to snuggle closer to her body, but soon realized through his sleepy haze that she wasn't beside him. "Marissa," he mumbled again. He squinted his eyes and put his arm up to shield them from the glaring sun shining through Marissa's balcony doors. He looked at the clock radio next to the bed and focused his eyes on the numbers. 8:18 am. "What is she doing up already?" He wondered. "This isn't normal." He, like anyone who knew Marissa, would be surprised to see her awake before dawn on a Saturday.
Ryan then sat up, taking in the sensations of pain and discomfort from his back and head. He eyes were fully open now, and he was aware. Aware of why he was in Marissa's bedroom, why he felt like he'd been hit by a truck, why Marissa was up so early. "Okay, this is happening," he whispered. "Last night happened." A million thoughts were racing through his mind, but the one thought that caused him to shudder was the very one that Marissa had asked last night; what happens now? Was Trey going to die? Will Sandy be able to help them? Would Marissa go to prison? Would they both go to prison? He shook his head, he was not going there. He wasn't sure if it was best, but he refused to acknowledge that this situation could get worse. No, Trey would be okay and Sandy would convince him to not press charges, he and Marissa would get past this and enjoy the summer together. Maybe they could take a trip somewhere…
He was interrupted from his reverie when Marissa stepped out from the bathroom in a robe and a towel wrapped over her hair. For a split second Ryan read the look on her delicate features. Her face still hadn't regained its color and her brows were furrowed with worry. Her eyes were bloodshot; she had been crying in the shower. Her eyes met Ryan's and she immediately tried to compose herself. She sat down on the bed next to him. "You're awake," she said through a forced smile. "Did you sleep well?"
Ryan knew she was trying to be brave for him, and it made him feel like he fell just a little bit more in love with her; something he thought would be impossible. "Alright I guess." He reached out and softly brushed his thumb across her eyebrow. "You?"
She bit her bottom lip and quickly turned her body to get off the bed, hoping Ryan hadn't noticed her eyes fill with tears. He had. "Umm, not so good," she whispered. She started to dry her hair with the towel. "Sandy called earlier. He wants us to meet him at your house when we're ready." She started to randomly pick up objects from her dresser and place them back down, as if to distract herself from the flood of tears that she was trying to desperately to hold back. "He sounded pretty good ya know, not as worried as I would have thought."
Ryan frowned. Her voice was shaking. He just wanted her to let it out; she had every right to cry and scream. The harder she tried to hold it all in, the more worried Ryan would get. He got up and walked towards her. He stopped when he was facing her and lifted her chin up so she would look at him. She seemed to be looking everywhere but his face, but he waited patiently until she met his gaze. "I'm scared too Marissa, it's okay." At his gentle words, she dropped her head on his shoulder and sobbed quietly.
After a minute she lifted her head and took a deep breath. "I'm just so…"
"Come on, let it out," Ryan coaxed.
Marissa nodded. "I'm just so angry, and sad, and frightened – I'm just so everything!" Her hands were made into tight fists, and she violently dropped them to her sides. "It's just not fair!" She was almost shouting.
Ryan was relived to see some color flush in her cheeks, and her eyes were starting to gain back some of their sparkle. He was right, expressing her emotions were helping. He cupped her face and lightly pressed his forehead on hers. "I know. But you can't shut me out."
Marissa softly kissed him on the lips. The two of them allowed a small smile to spread across their faces. "I promise I won't if you promise you won't," she said quietly but seriously.
Ryan returned her kiss. "I promise." He dropped his hands to the small of her back and stepped closer to hold her in a tight hug. "Let's go see Sandy."
Twenty minutes later Ryan pulled into the Cohen's driveway in the Range Rover. He stepped out and met Marissa at the front of the vehicle. He took her hand when he saw the hesitant look in her eyes. "I'm gonna take a quick shower before we start the day. You can wait for me in the pool house or get some breakfast if you want."
"I'll just wait for you. I'm not too hungry yet."
"Okay." Ryan started to walk towards the back with Marissa following. "I'll just be a few minutes," he commented when they stepped inside.
"Yep." Marissa took a seat on one of the barstools and grabbed a magazine that was lying on the counter close to her. "So this is where I left this," she thought. It was a magazine she had bought last month that she had left here before she had a chance to read. "I guess Ryan had no use for this." She smiled to herself as she started to flip through pages of the May edition of Cosmo. Her smile quickly disappeared when she came to a page that made her hand fly up to her mouth. "Oh my God," she gasped. She was staring at a photograph of Ryan and Trey that she had tucked within the pages of the magazine. They were laughing, with their arms around each other's shoulders. She forgot about this pictures; she had taken it at Trey's surprise birthday party and was planning on framing it for Ryan.
Marissa felt like she couldn't breathe, the room was spinning, she needed air. She ran out of the pool house and flopped on one of the deck chairs. She let her face drop in her hands and her body racked with sobs.
Ryan was drying off from his shower and starting to get dressed in his bathroom. "Hey, I think we have some of those cinnamon bagels that you like," he shouted to Marissa. He waited for a response. Nothing. Ryan stepped out of the bathroom and found the pool house empty. He looked out the window and spotted her by the pool. He didn't have to study her carefully to see that she was crying. "What set her off?" He wondered. She seemed to have calmed down before they left her house. Something caught his eye on the kitchen counter and he walked towards the stool that Marissa was sitting on. Ryan picked up the picture and closed his eyes as he let out a heavy sigh. "Christ." He dropped the picture as if it was burning his fingers and made his way towards Marissa.
"Not gettin any breaks, are we?" Marissa was startled by Ryan's voice above her. She winced as she realized that she had ran out of the pool house without hiding the photo. She looked up at his face. He looked like he was on the verge of tears. She wiped her own eyes.
"No more crying," she silently demanded herself. "Oh Ryan, I'm so sorry. I had forgotten about it."
"Hey, it's okay." It suddenly struck him that Trey might not be alive; no doubt that was what Marissa was thinking when she saw the photograph. His heart started beating faster. Marissa seemed to reading his thoughts.
"Let's go find Sandy," Marissa said as she stood up. "He can tell us how he's doing." Sandy hadn't mentioned Trey's condition when he called this morning; that must be good she convinced herself.
They stepped into the kitchen to find Seth and Summer preparing bowls of cereal, four of them. "Hey," Seth looked exhausted, but like Marissa had for Ryan, he put up a brave front and plastered a supportive grin on his face. "It's good to see you guys here, you know, together and okay." He and Summer had wondered if last night would serve to completely destroy Ryan and Marissa's relationship, but both were relieved when Sandy told them this morning that Ryan had spent the night at Marissa's. "I'm so sorry man." Seth stepped towards Ryan and grabbed him in a hug. As he did this, Summer practically ran to Marissa and did the same.
"Oh, Coop, are you alright?" Summer freely let the tears stream down her face. She for one, didn't feel that holding back feelings would help anyone right now.
Marissa held on tightly to her best friend; she knew Summer would be here for her in whatever way she needed; she was so grateful for that. "We'll be okay. You guys?"
Summer smoothed the hair off Marissa's forehead. "Well you know Cohen, his wit and sarcasm comes in useful in hard times."
Marissa smiled and looked at Seth. "Yeah, don't we know it," Ryan laughed. The four switched places; Summer hugging Ryan and Seth hugging Marissa.
When they had all separated, Seth cleared his throat. "Well, we're all in this together." He and Summer, like Ryan and Marissa, were suffering from an overwhelming feeling of guilt; that they were responsible for what happened. But now wasn't the time to talk about fault, and they all knew it.
Just then Sandy walked into the kitchen. He was wearing the same clothes he had on when he arrived at the hospital the night before, and he looked like he had just been through a war. He looked sympathetically at the group and silently prayed for what had to be the millionth time that this whole ordeal would go away. But it wasn't going to, and he knew that he would have to fight like he's never fought before to help these kids – his kids.
"Well I'm glad you're all here. Get your breakfast and head to the living room. We've got a long day ahead of us."