Rahne
By Todd Fan
Disclaimer: "Me, I didn't mean anything. About anything, to anyone. And I knew that guaranteed me a long, depression-free life"
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ACT 8 - Getting to know ye
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Their boss home, the staff bustle about their business, as servants take away his bags, Bobby take his coat, and Storm does.. assistant things
"Yeah, Baby!", grins Warren
"I will not tolerate that talk!", growls Storm
"...Sorry..the no hair on my head thing is making my brain go", Warren waggles a hand, "...errr mushy".
"Yes, and it was hard enough to get you bald", snaps Pietro, "you flew away every time we came near you with a razor"
"Wouldn't you?", asks Warren, "Oh wait, you can't fly. Haa-haaa!"
"Warren", says Pietro slowly, "..we drugged you and got you in your sleep".
"Oh", Warren's wings droop, "..yes".
"Welcome home, Mr Worthington", smiles Storm, "How was your trip?"
Seemingly to have forgotten Rahne's presence, Warren starts to head to his office
"Don't ask me about my trip. It was a nightmare. My factories are shutting down right and left. It's bad, very bad. I'll be in my study", he says, "Roberto, bring me a sandwich"
"Bring your own damn sandwich", snorts Roberto, "I'm as rich as you are wing-boy!"
"Roberto, if you haven't noticed the dress, you are a maid", says Pietro pointedly, "now go make a sandwich".
"I hate this fic", growls Roberto, "I was better off as the Chihuahua"
"SHAMLESS PLUG!", screams Pietro..
"…That's getting annoying", says Rahne.
Roberto storms off, as Storm gives Warren a message
"President Xavier phoned", she says, "He's awaiting your call at the White House"
"President Xavier", giggled Xavier backstage, "has a nice ring to it, doesn't it?"
"Fine", Warren pauses, finally noticing Rahne again, "..What did you say your name was?"
"Rahne, sir", smiles Rahne
Warren looks at Storm confused, then blinks a few times
"Is there any particular reason why you're here?", he asks.
Storm speaks in that 'we've already been though this' voice
"With all the negative press you're been receiving, sir"
"Oh...yes", Warren clears his throat, "...right"
"Rahne is the orphan you invited for Christmas", smiles Storm
Warren looks at Rahne again
"You're a girl", he says, "Orphans are boys"
"...I'm an orphan", says Storm, "sexist pig"
"I was reading from my lines!", says Warren, "…please don't hit me with lightning, Forge says it really, really hurts"
"You didn't specify boy, sir", says Storm icily.
"Awww, gee, Mr. Worthington, sir, that's okay. You can trade me in for a boy", says Rahne, sighing and heading for the door, "I really liked seeing your house. It sure is big".
Storm gives Warren a 'WELL!' look. Warren sighs and goes after her
"She's very good at those looks", says Warren, blinking
"Don't I know it", says Forge
"You go back to working the robots!", snaps Storm.
"…..Yes, Dear", sighs Forge, slinking off.
"Rahne, I couldn't be more delighted that you'll be spending Christmas here with me in my", Warren blinks, "...big house".
Rahne grins, mission accomplished, Warren blinks at her as she smiles sweetly, and leans in by Storm
"What are we supposed to do with her?", he whispers.
"Well, it is Rahne's first night here", says Storm, "so..."
"Then come to my club for dinner and cigars", nods Warren
"Sir, your club is for men only", says Storm, "sexist pig"
"And I dunnae smoke!", say Rahne.
"..I see", Warren pauses in thought, "Then how about a brandy?"
"Promise me you'll never produce offspring, Warren", says Storm, "How about a Broadway show?"
"Gee, I've never been to one of those before!", says Rahne
"Then you'll attend a Broadway show", nods Warren, "..with Ororo".
Warren heads into his study, being followed close behind by a not-too-happy Storm, dragging Rahne behind her. Warren looks at the letters on his desk, then blinks as Rahne is shoved in front of him
"I thought you were going out", he says
"Oh..yes, well, see, Mr. Worthington", nods Rahne, "I've never met anybody with a real job, except Mr Bundles"
"Yeah, laundry is a real job", snorts Warren.
There is a flash of lightning as Warren is smote.
"….Todd Fan just spent all day in a hot laundry room, now is not the time to be making cracks about the job she has to have to pay student fees", says Pietro.
"Got it", squeaks Warren.
"So I'd kinda like te watch you work", says Rahne, watching smoke rise from Warrens wings.
"Fine", says Warren, "Sometime when I'm not busy"
"Sir, you're never not busy", points out Storm
"..Oh..All right", sighs Warren.
He sits at his desk, sorting through his mail and various paperwork, while Rahne sits in a huge chair, watching him with awe. Unfortunately, it makes Warren very uncomfortable, and after a few seconds, puts his papers down.
"Well, that's about it. Good-bye".
"Couldn't I watch just a few more minutes?", whines Rahne.
Warren sighs, looking helplessly at Storm, who merely grins
"..I hate that woman", mutters Warren.
We cut to where Warren is on the phone to Xavier, Rahne hanging on the back of his chair, still watching him, making him look behind him nervously from time to time.
"My assessment of the situation, Mr President?", he says, "Well, it's pretty darned bad out there"
"Darned?", Pietro blinks, "man ye olde language is odd"
"My factories, everybody's factories, are shutting down. Mr President, I know you're feeling pressure", Warren pauses, glancing at Rahne behind him, "I'm feeling pressure myself, at this very moment. You're coming to New York for the holidays?"
"Invite him for Christmas!", squeals Rahne.
"Why don't you and...Mrs Xavier spend Christmas with me and my new", Warren pauses, "...Rahne"
"…………There's a Mrs Xavier?", blinks Xavier.
"Mum ran away", says Lucas, "she said"
He pulls out a note from his pocket, reading it.
"Drop dead. Freak", he smiles, "isnae that nice?"
"……..I couldn't have a normal son, could I?", asks Xavier.
"You think mine is normal?", asks Magneto from backstage, "he played with dolls as a kid"
"They were action figures!", screams Pietro, "back to the parody!"
"Excellent!", grins Warren, putting the phone down, "He said yes!"
"That's wonderful news!", smiles Storm
"So the President of the United States is coming to your house for Christmas?", asks Rahne
"For Christmas dinner!", Warren pauses, "...I wonder what Democrats eat"
"Lets go out and celebrate with Rahne", says Storm, "We'll show her the town".
"Too much work, Ororo", says Warren
"That's okay, sir. I've never seen New York before", shrugs Rahne, "so I'm just as happy to watch you work".
Warren looks at her in surprise
"You're telling me you live in New York City, and you haven't seen the place?"
"..Miss Darkholme", starts Rahne
"She runs the orphanage", adds Storm
"Well...she never lets us kids out", says Rahne, "What's New York City like anyway?"
"Well, it's..Hmm...let me think. N.Y.C", Warren pauses, then rolls his eyes as he sings.
What is it about you?
You're big
You're loud
You're tough
Bobby glances over at Storm
"Will you be needing the car?", he asks
"The way you drive? Hah!", she says, "No, I think she's been cooped up long enough"
Warren has got out of his seat, and wanders to the edge of his desk, where there is an ornate snow-globe, with New York City in it.
N-Y-C
I go years without you
Then I can't get enough
He shakes the snow globe, sending snow flurries into it)
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Big musical number on it's way!