Besiad - Village - The village has been decorated with festive banners and streamers. A fire is burning merrily in the plaza, which is surrounded by tables of food ready to be devoured. A large, mysterious crate stands between two houses. Despite the festive air, the village is silent and empty.

The village was still and quiet. "Where is everyone?" Rikku asked in a small voice from where she stood using the wall as a shield. "Maybe they left?" Tidus hazarded, looking over his shoulder at the rest of the group. Shoulders lifted in helpless ignorance. They were all clumped together at the entrance to the village, using the theory that there was safety in numbers, and that you stood a better chance of surviving if you were in a group. What most people do not know is that by and large, this theory is incorrect. Traveling in large groups actually makes it easier for all kinds of Dangerous Things to find you, increases your chances of being eaten by said Things, and makes it easier for said Things to leave no evidence. It also makes it easier for Freak Accidents to leave no survivors.

"Some one should go make sure it's safefor Yunato go in." Auron said from behind Lulu. His eye darted from shadow to shadow, looking for fiends and other dangers. "Kimahri," he said.

Moments later, Tidus stumbled into the village with a yelp. He did a funny little dance as he tried to keep his feet, then froze, watching and listening. "Hey, guys," he whispered uncertainly, looking at the huddled shadow of his friends. They offered no help, except to flap their hands at him. He squinted and could just discern that they were motioning for him to take a closer look.

He screamed as a piece of paper skittered across his path and tangled in his feet. He screamed again as a mob of people burst out of hiding and attacked him with warcries of "Surprise!" and "Welcome home!"

Yuna was beside him suddenly, laughing and smiling as the villagers blinked at Tidus in confusion. "Your're not Lady Yuna!" an old woman accused. The people laughed and beckoned to the rest of the party (who were still hiding behind the wall.)

The people of Besaid swept Yuna away, asking her all kinds of questions about her journey. The fun and festivities lasted into the night. There was dancing, which Wakka tried to get Kimahri to do. He begged and pleaded, but the Ronso refused, at least until Yuna asked him to dance. He would do anything for Yuna, even his awkward Ronso dances, which involved hopping and skipping around the fire. There were contests of constitutional strength, to see who would eat what off the ground.

The score was currently one piece of beef :dipped in chili sauce, burnt to a crisp, licked by the entire blitz ball team, soaked in wine backwashed in by Keepa, smeared with vegetable matter of suspicious origin, rolled in dirt, chewed on by a village granny, pecked by a chocobo, and then stepped on by a Ronso

Yuna tried to get Tidus to dance with her, but his brain seemed to be having trouble communicating with his feet. It was like the two parts of him were speaking different languages. (Actually, his brain was not speaking to him.)

Yuna let him escape, suggesting that he get something to eat. Tidus was doing just that, when Auron found him. He was trying to get some food without losing any appendages. When it came to food, Wakka was a fierce competitor.

Seeing his nemesis approaching, Tidus tried to kick his brain awake. It muttered sleepily and ignored him. Tidus faced Auron alone. "Yuna and Rikku want you to help them tell the villagers about the journey." he said.

"Sure. Inna minute." Tidus muttered. He wondered briefly why he was holding a plate of food, then carefully set it down and watched numbly as it was looted by Wakka. "Less go." he said to Auron, and followed him to the little knot of bodies around Yuna and Rikku.

He yawned periodically, as the story was told. Most of it revolved around Tidus' exploits, and his snoring mind dimly registered the praise, but it was still not speaking to him. It was so upset with him for keeping it up past its bedtime, that just out of spite, it offered no warning of the impending danger.

"Tell them about the Temple Blessing. I'm sure everyone would love to hear about it."

Tidus stared at Auron for a moment, vaguely realizing that he had been set up. He briefly thought about pretending to be sleepwalking. Perhaps if he had been more awake (and on speaking terms with his brain) he might have been able to pull it off. He also might have been able to successfully pretend that he did not know what Auron was talking about.

"The Blessing was…well, um. It was…revealing. And, um…"

"He brought each of you a little souvenir." Auron interrupted, walking over to the mysterious crate squatting in the shadows. Tidus did not like the look of that crate. It had 'Your Butt Here' written all over it. Out of this simple box Auron withdrew the death of Tidus' social life. He pulled out a sphere. And then another. He began handing them out, one to each person. He even gave one to the other guardians. They looked so deceptively innocent, that at first Tidus thought nothing of them. The villagers said their good-nights, and retired for the remainder of the evening.

Confused, Tidus zombie-walked his way to his small dwelling next to Kimahri's. The Old Fart was up to something. The feeling that something was wrong increased to an almost painful level as ecstatic giggles, exclamations of shock and a few outright guffaws pierced the air. Tidus got the uncomfortable feeling that he had something to do with it, but for some reason he was not getting the warm fuzzy feeling he usually got when he brought a little amusement into someone's otherwise dull existence.

Yuna stopped Tidus as he was about to stumble into his tent. "Thank you for the gift." she said with a laugh as she stood on tiptoes to kiss his cheek (Kimahri growled disapprovingly, but was ignored). "It was thoughtful of you. Every time I look at it, I will remember this journey."

"You're welcome." Tidus said in confusion as she disappeared into her own tent. Tidus pushed through the curtain doing door duty and proceeded to leave a trail of clothes (starting with his shoes) leading to his bed.

"Bed." he sighed with a sleepy grin as he flopped down on the soft blankets. He groaned as something poked him uncomfortable in the back. He reached under himself and withdrew the offending object. It was a sphere, one of the ones Auron had handed out to everyone. He looked into it, wondering why that walking cadaver was so insistent that everyone should have one. He did not remember buying them at any time. If he had bought souvenirs, he would have bought one for Yuna and Rikku, and maybe Lulu.

Images swirled in the sphere; familiar images he had seen before. In fact he had been there when both events happened. Tidus' brain crowded over to see what was so interesting. Look, the temple….The Temple! He gasped as he realized he was watching a sphere of the Blessing, pantsing and all. And right on its tail came the whole 'Moon' incident. A message followed. An image of Auron swam into view and spoke.

Tidus,

By the time you see this, it will probably be too late. By now, everyone in the village will have one, and they have probably watched it already. And of course plans to send copies to all the relatives will have been made. It's nothing personal, but by now, thousands of copies of this sphere have also been sold in Luca, among other places. Remember the three old men on the boat? Well, they were in on it too. I paid them to make copies, and add in your 'clever' solution to the Moon riddle. I think Jecht would be pleased to know that you are finally famous. Probably more famous than he was. Though, perhaps it's not quite the same kind of fame he had in mind for you. He always wanted you to have a view from the top.

They say that everyone has their fifteen minutes of fame, and I'm certain that your fifteen minutes will last much, much longer.

Tidus felt cold dread hit him like a shoopuf: Everyone in the village had one of these! Even the old women. He shuddered at the thought of little old ladies watching these spheres. Then, an even more terrible thought rose ponderously to the surface of his thoughts. It was like looking down into your glass to see a big greasy cockroach bobbing serenely on the surface. His stomach shriveled up as small as it could and tried to hide behind his spine as panic seized him. Yuna had one of those spheres!

Just as the realization hit him, a voice spoke from the darkness.

"Now, we are even."

Tidus jumped and stifled a scream as a face was illuminated by pyre flies. It was the most hideous thing he had ever seen. It was pale and slightly wrinkled, like fingers get when left in water for too long. One eye burned in its shadowy socket as the apparition laughed with the sound of a coffin closing.

Tidus fainted.

Auron stood in the middle of the house for a few moments, then walked away. He paused just before leaving, and stooped down to pick up Tidus' pants. After searching the pocket, he counted the gil he found. "One thousand, seven hundred, and forty. That's most of it." he said, putting the money in his coat. Then he walked out. "Welcome home."