Sanzo as New Director

Disclaimers: Blah, blah, blah…The characters in this story DO NOT belong to me aside from Samantha whom I'm casting as the director. Satisfied now? Great. This fanfiction is dedicated to my good friend Samantha and no; do not even dare to think that you can use this piece of information to blackmail me.

Characters:

Samantha (As director)

Sanzo

Gojyo

Goku

Hakkai

Lilin

Dokugakuji

Yaone

Kougaiji

The cameras are set in place and the lights are dimmed. The actors are making last-minute preparations for the characters which they are about to play.

Samantha: 'Take 1! Action!'

(Take 1)

The sun is shining brightly in the aqua-blue sky. (A/N: Duh, have you ever seen a dim sun other than an eclipse? Maybe dim sum the dumpling but… you get the point. I'd better stop talking about food now; Goku is practically drowning in his own saliva.) Two figures are seen standing in the desert surrounded by a seemingly endless vast area of sand.

Goku (Rudely interrupting): 'What's with this really lousy desert? Don't you know that sand isn't edible? Samantha; I'm hungry! When's dinner?'

(Sanzo starts whacking Goku on the head with his lethal paper fan.)

Sanzo: 'Shadup, shadup, SHADUP! You stupid monkey with a stomach in place of your brain! Lunch was five minutes ago!'

(Back to take 1)

The two figures turn out to be Goku and Kougaiji. Upon seeing each other, they both ready themselves in a position to fight. Kougaiji is the first to attack and dashes forward with demonic speed (A/N: He is a demon after all.), hands and claws extended to beat Goku to a pulp (A/N: That is if he can.).

(Kougaiji trips over a stone)

Kougaiji (sweatdrops): 'What the…'

(He lands face first into the sand.)

Kougaiji (Choking in disgust) 'Blagh! Yuck!'

(Sanzo and Gojyo smirk deviously while the more compassionate Hakkai sweatdrops along with Lilin, Yaone and Dokugaiji. Goku starts laughing hysterically like a mad maniac just as a strong wind blows. Sand is blown into his face as well as his wide open mouth.)

Goku (Joining Kougaiji): 'Blagh! Yuck! Told you that sand isn't edible!'

(Behind the set)

Gojyo (Unable to control his laughter): 'Bwahahaha! What the hell was that? That must be what they call handage! Heh heh…'

Dokugakuji: 'Sometimes, little brother, I think that you're seriously ill in the mental department. Why even bother asking a question if you already know the answer?'

Gojyo (Anger vein popping out at his forehead): 'Like hell I'm little!'

Dokugakuji (Calmly): 'You have several options. Little, tiny, miniature, puny, small, mini…'

Gojyo (Cuts Dokugakuji off from his rant): 'Why you!'

(Deciding that actions speak louder than words, Gojyo starts a fight with Dokugakuji. Clouds dust rise and envelope the two in anime style, showing only glimpses of limbs flying here and there. Hakkai's and Yaone's voices can be heard in the background pleading them to stop before being drowned out by the war cries by Gojyo and Dokugaiji. (A/N: They don't really do war cries do they?))

Lilin: 'Where's baldy head? It's not like him to miss out on something like this.'

(Everybody stops what they were doing instantly.)

Gojyo (Nursing a black-eye and nodding in agreement): 'Lilin's right. That sadistic monk is always on the prowl for something like this to happen. Where could he be?'

Sanzo (Appearing out of nowhere and freaking everyone out): 'What the hell are you bullshitting about? You stupid cockroach, it's footage, not handage!'

Gojyo (Trying to stop his eyebrow from twitching): 'Who died and made you the director guru?'

Sanzo (Smirking evilly): 'You're now looking at your new director. Samantha got fed-up with your moronic acts and is now taking a vacation in Japan.'

(Everybody's jaw drops down.)

A/N: Yay, that was the perfect cliffhanger for me to stop at… Please review and whatever or I won't update!