The Next Week…

            "Hey Spike," Buffy said, entering the abandoned gym, "Spike?  Spike, where are you?"  It was unusual for Spike not to be in the gym when she entered.  He was usually already there, already covered in sweat from a vigorous workout.  He taunted her with that fact—that he started his workout hours before the "chosen one" did.  "Spike?  You here?" The slayer asked once more.  She was about to begin her workout, assuming that Spike would be there any minute, smoldering blanket over him as he burst through the door.  However, she heard sounds coming from the alley out back.

            Stepping into the alley the Slayer cringed as the scent of rotting fish invaded her senses.  It was dark in the alley only a few slivers of light getting past the large trashcans that barred the entrance.  Buffy wasn't particularly fond of the alley, for the obvious reasons, and was about to turn back inside and chalk the noise up to someone's drunken wandering.  However, once the scent of blood hit her nose, the slayer couldn't help but go further into the alley.

            Creeping past several trash bins she saw it…a sight she'd never forget.  A middle-aged woman was pressed against the wall of the alley.  Her body was arching up towards a figure clad in black, and blood was gushing from a wound in her neck as the figure hungrily sucked at the wounds.  It wasn't until the woman's lifeless body slumped to the ground that Buffy let out a soft moan of horror.  True, she had seen a vampire feeding before, and it wasn't that she was squeamish.  It was just, for some reason, the sight of a woman losing her life in a disgusting alley struck a chord with her.

            At the sound of the slayer's moan the vampire whipped around without thinking.  And, at the sight of Buffy's eyes he instinctively changed out of game face.  Her eyes conveyed so many emotions.  Confusion, pain, hurt, and anger.  And his mirrored those emotions back at the slayer. 

"Spike," Buffy whispered softly, recognizing the vampire immediately.  Timidly, Spike stepped towards Buffy, unsure of what her reaction would be.  Would she view him as a threat?  Would she understand his actions, his craving for blood and need for violence?

"Buffy, love," Spike whispered.  "Listen to me baby."  The slayer shook head no, her lower lip jutting out to form a confused and upset pout.

"No…you.  How can you be…?"  The slayer stammered.  Of course she knew Spike fed.  It just…hadn't completely processed.  After the night she had offered to walk down to the butcher with him, only to have him refuse, the knowledge that he probably killed humans had crossed her mind a few times.  However, it was so easy to forget that he was a killer when he helped her patrol, when he kissed her forehead, or when he watched cartoons with her.

"Slayer, we need to talk now, okay," Spike said softly, coming towards Buffy.  The slayer thought of protesting.  However, Spike came closer and touched Buffy's elbow, leading her inside the training room, and all thoughts of protest left Buffy's mind.

            It was a few moments before Buffy spoke, unable to stand the silence for any longer.

"How could you do that?" She asked in horror.

"I'm a vampire, pet.  It's what I do," Spike explained patiently.

"Someone is dead because of you," Buffy ground out, through clenched teeth.

"And I would be dead if I didn't get any food," Spike said, his voice rising in anger.

"You killed someone," The slayer whispered once more in horror.

"I killed one person slayer.  She wasn't the President or anything.  She was a cashier; An unimportant employee at the ACME.

"And that makes it okay?" Buffy asked in horror.

"I'm just saying her death didn't matter to anyone," Spike said.

"It mattered to somebody—to her children, to her co-workers.  She was a human being and now she's dead because of you."

"I need to feed love.  I won't become some tame puppy just because I lo-" Spike stopped himself before he said he loved her, relieved that the slayer was too preoccupied to question what he had been about to say.

"Then I have to kill you," Buffy said softly, looking at the ground.  After a moment's pause she looked up, meeting Spike's gaze unflinchingly.  Would Spike see through her lie?  Would he realize that she could never kill him?  That she could hate him and curse him and hurt him, but that she could never bring herself to take him out of this world.

"You won't kill me," Spike said with more confidence than he felt.

"Maybe not, but I'll hate you, and it'll hurt just as much."  Another silence followed the slayer's words.

"What if I feed but don't kill?" Spike asked softly, his voice becoming patient once more.

"I don't understand," Buffy said.

"I can take blood, enough that I'm satiated, but I won't take enough to kill the human I'm feeding from," Spike explained.  Buffy took a deep breath, a battle waging beneath her calm exterior.

"The human will live.  They'll be able to go home to their families and friends?" The slayer asked skeptically.

"I swear the human will live," Spike said, his voice unwavering.

"Okay then.  As long as they live," Bufy decided.  She took a deep breath and then met Spike's eyes.  Unable to help herself the slayer walked closer to Spike and wrapped her arms around his neck, holding him closely as she tried to hold back tears.  It was so hard to live in this world.  Once again, the lines that used to be black and white were becoming gray.

            Buffy and Spike didn't train that day.  They sat for most of it in silence, Spike still holding the slayer, each savoring the feel of being so close to the other, each not admitting that they felt that way.  As the sun was setting Buffy got up to go.  Spike stood also and followed the slayer outside of the abandoned gym and onto the street.  The sun was low enough that he was in no danger of bursting into flames.  Spike trailed Buffy as she walked in the familiar route that led to her house.  The two paused when they reached her front door.  Buffy was about to ask Spike if he wanted to come inside and hang out when she heard her mother's voice.

"Buffy!" Joyce called, coming towards the slayer.  She was about a block away and was probably alerting the whole neighborhood to her presence by calling the slayer's name.  However, Buffy waved to her mom, fighting down her embarrassment.  As Joyce approached the corner and was about to cross over to the street where the Summers' house was a vampire stepped out behind her.

"Mom lookout!" Buffy screamed.  Spike and Buffy both set off at a run towards where Joyce stood.  It was too late.  The vampire, a demon who couldn't have been more than a few years old, sunk it's fangs into Joyce's neck.  The slayer's mother barely let out a yelp before blood was gushing from her wound and she had collapsed, lifelessly to the ground.

"Mom!" Buffy screamed in horror.  Reaching the place where her mother lay dead the slayer knelt down, cradling Joyce's limp head in her lap.  The vampire that had just killed Joyce was preparing to pounce on Buffy when Spike raced up next to the slayer, staking the vampire as he prepared to pounce.  It seemed as if Buffy didn't even see him.  She just kept staring blankly into the lifeless eyes of her mother.

"Buffy," Spike murmured softly, "Buffy love you need to come with me.  We need to call the hospital," Spike whispered.

"Mommy," The slayer whispered.

"Slayer, we need to get you inside.," Spike said, running a hand through his hair before kneeling down beside the slayer.  He didn't know what to say.  All he could think of was the sight of the vampire sinking its fangs into Joyce's neck.  True, he had done the same thing just that day.  But in this case it was different.  The woman he had killed wasn't like Joyce.  Joyce was special.  She was beautiful, and kind, and the slayer loved her.  The woman he had killed was…Spike trailed off.  He finally got it.  To somebody, the woman he killed was mom.  But there was time later for guilt and sadness.  Right now he needed to get Buffy inside.  It wouldn't do to have the slayer outside all night.  "Come with me Buffy.  I'll take care of everything," Spike whispered after an awkward silence.  Come inside love."

            Buffy nodded blankly, not meeting Spike's eyes, still staring at her mother.  She was barely aware of Spike picking her up and taking her inside. She didn't know when Spike brought her mother inside, or when Joyce was taken to the morgue.  All she remembered was falling asleep as Spike carried her gently inside, and then waking up again as he peered in at her, the hall light casting a glow upon her.

"Spike," The slayer murmured softly.

"I've got you baby," The vampire whispered, coming into the slayer's room.  He kicked off his shoes, socks and shirt, carelessly tossing them aside, before crawling into bed next to the slayer.  "Don't worry about anything.  We'll take care of all the business tomorrow.  Right now you sleep," Spike commanded gently.

"I don't think I can," Buffy admitted softly.  "I'm so…."

"Then close your eyes and I'll talk to you," Spike whispered.  His deep accent lulled the slayer to sleep "J'atai necoupata leolarci.  Vicouma tumatai falarcta neouraci.  Cartpaya liraidtuo.  J'aitai pectafa.," Spike whispered.  He paused of a minutes, listening to the slayer's deep breathing, and steady heartbeat, a sign that she was asleep.  "You have no idea how much I want to make love to you right now.  Over and over until you can't breath, can't speak, can't walk.  Over and over until you can only love," The vampire translated to the sleeping slayer.  Then he kissed her forehead softly, and closed his eyes, joining her in sleep.

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*Authors Note: The language used above is a language that my friend and I made up when we were about five years old.  So, if you're looking at the words and going…good god this girl's failing Spanish, I'm really not.  First of all, because I take French and Hebrew, and second of all, because the language is kind of um….not real!*