Disclaimer: I don't own the characters. However I DO own the plot.
Chapter 2:
Lily watched the steaming red train whistle, signaling the others that it will leave in five minutes.
I have to get on to the train, she thought.
But her feet stayed rooted to the spot where she stood. All around her people are scurrying about doing anything Lily wasn't doing.
"Are you planning on going to Hogwarts or just standing there staring at those people, which, may I say, are becoming conscious of your gaze?" a deep, laughing voice murmured behind her ear. Lily turned to the voice with a false smile, not really feeling like talking to anyone at the moment.
"Actually I was thinking what people would be doing if there would be an attack right at this moment." She replied absently.
The man looked at her worriedly. "We better get inside. Jen and Paul are waiting for us." He half dragged Lily to the train just as it whistled again.
Lily looked at the man pulling her hand and she sighed inwardly. This was the man she ought to marry. This was the man she'd hoped for five years to notice her love for him. Now there would be no chance for him to know her feelings for him and realize that they were meant to be together.
When they finally found their compartment, they noticed that Jen and Paul were nowhere to be found. The man sat down on one of the seats and pulled Lily down to sit beside her.
"Is something wrong?" he asked worriedly.
Lily didn't answer. Instead she looked outside the window where she saw trees passing by quickly as though she were watching a continuously moving picture. What is wrong? She thought. The fact that I'm engaged to a bastard who I don't even know well and wants nothing from me but money? The fact that after that incident I couldn't have a relationship with anyone anymore? The fact that—
"I said is something wrong?" he asked again, halting her thoughts.
She turned so that her whole body was facing his.
"Would you believe, Matt? That I had the most interesting summer ever?" she asked, her voice light yet her eyes void of it.
He looked at her weirdly. "I couldn't say," he said. "But would you mind if you tell me about it?"
Lily was about to open her mouth to tell her story, then she closed it. "I can't say."
"And why is that? You have me worrying here—"
She felt tenderness warm her heart at his worrying.
"—and as a friend, I deserve to know what has been troubling you because I can't stand seeing you like that."
Lily was dumbfounded. Just a friend? Why not more than a friend? Why can't you say that you like me more than a friend? Say it, please! Say it!
Lily shook her head at this thought. Forget it! There's no chance we could be more than friends. Even if we were, it still wouldn't work out.
"I-I really can't say."
She felt devastated when she saw his face harden.
"I see." He said after a moment of silence.
"Matt, I—" Lily tried to explain but she was interrupted by the compartment door opening, revealing her two best friends, Jen and Paul.
"There you are!" Jen exclaimed, exasperated. "We were looking all over for you! We were getting worried that Matt wasn't able to find you so we set out to find you ourselves—"
"—and when the train moved, we panicked. Jennifer here thought you guys were left behind so she went hyper, but I, being the reasonable one, told her that they must have gotten on the train and must be on their way to our compartment." Paul stated. "So, I therefore conclude that—"
"—you are the liar of all liars and that it was me who was the reasonable one and you the worry wart." Jen finished, looking at him. Paul frowned.
"Great way of explaining, Jen," Paul muttered sarcastically, "Actually, being their friend, I have the right to be worried for them. You're just heartless."
"What??" Jen demanded. "I do care for my friends. It's just that I can control my feelings and not show my worries in a desperate manner unlike gay people like you"
"Say that again and you'll wish you were never born." Paul growled.
"Make me." She looked at him in the eye.
"Oh, I will." He replied, slowly walking towards her. He was about to tackle her when Lily's voice interrupted.
"Hey, guys! Guess what? I got chosen as prefect!" she said, trying to lighten up the mood. Paul looked up and saw those miserable eyes.
"That's great. I got chosen too. So I guess we're the two prefects in Gryffindor. Say, would you like to come with me to the Prefect's compartment?"
She half smiled. "I guess." She stood up and followed Paul out of the compartment door.
There was a long silence that ensued inside the compartment. Jen was looking at Matt contemplating on what to tell him. Matt was staring out the window acting cool and indifferent. Jen realized that she wouldn't be getting any word from Matt so she took a book from her bag and began to read.
"Jen, I need a favor." Matt finally spoke after long minutes of silence. Jen looked up from her book and raised an eyebrow.
"I'm serious," he said. "Since you're Lily's best and closest friend from all three of us, I believe she would tell you everything that happened to her during the summer. Something's wrong with her and I bet she would tell them to you because she damn could not tell them to me."
She saw the anger flashing on his eyes. He's really serious about this. If she didn't tell Matt what was wrong with her, then her problem must be serious.
"I'll try to talk to her. But since she didn't tell you what her problems were, there's a chance she wouldn't tell me either." She said softly.
"I know she will." Matt said resolutely.
Jen's only reply was staring at the window and pondering on what to say to Lily later.
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The walk to the prefect's lounge was quiet and uneventful. Paul kept on shooting worried glances at Lily, who never uttered a word since they left the compartment.
When they arrived, they were instructed to patrol the corridors constantly. Thinking that this would be a chance to ask Lily on what was wrong with her, he followed her around, occasionally greeted some students who waved. However, she was too busy regulating peace and order to notice him. When they finally reached the end of the train, Paul thought that this was now or never.
"Are you alright?" he blurted out suddenly, stopping Lily's conversation with a nervous-looking first year student.
She hesitated, then said "Yes, I am perfectly fine. Why do you ask?"
"You don't act fine. You're not your usual self today."
"I'm not?" she asked dully, looking down at herself.
"Yes, you are now will you stop that?" he almost screamed in frustration.
"Stop what?" she looked at him.
"Arrgh!" Paul stormed away from her and ignored the greetings people said along his way.
Lily stared at his back and sighed. Damn me! She swore before she continued to talk to the panicked-looking first year.
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Jen stared at Lily walk absently up the stairs, her head hung down. She has been like this since the moment she caught sight of her at the train. Matt was really serious about this, she thought. She suddenly remembered Lily telling her at the end of their fourth year that she was going to spend her summer in Spain. Every year, she would spend her summer in different countries. She remembered the summer after her first year she and her family were expected to leave for Brazil. Two months before their departure she was owled two thick books containing the history and culture of Brazil for her to study and memorize. Also, two weeks before that, a visitor came and taught Lily how to speak Portuguese, the language spoken in Brazil. Being the responsible daughter that she is, Lily followed orders and studied all about it and mastered the language.
Since then, she had been having the same routine for the past three years. After her second year, she went to Paris where she was unanimously famous. At only the age of twelve, her outstanding beauty, humor and intelligence impressed others greatly and her parents silently applauded her with pride. It was not only her though, together with her sister, Petunia, who also had wit and modesty, they helped strengthen foreign relationships socially. However, fame had its price. Petunia was too flattered by society's remarks that she became an arrogant egotist. Her popularity soon faded after that.
Their third year had been the best of all. Matt came to Hogwarts as an exchange student and he was instantly welcomed. With his strong build and ruggedly chiseled face, which was the "thing" during that period, who wouldn't? Lily fell in love with him the moment she set her eyes on him. Jen knew that it was only an infatuation, and her guess was right. As soon as he became part of their group, her annoyingly girlish squeals she would perform after an encounter with him soon died out. She figured that it was merely nothing but good looks that attracted her to him. During summer, which Lily was to spend in Japan, they constantly owled each other about what had happened with each other.
When she returned, she gave heaps of gifts to all her friends and told everything about what had happened to her during her summer in Japan.
This year, however, she never gave gifts and lifted a smile on her face. A smile on her mouth, yes, but it didn't reach her eyes at all.
Spain must be quite a place, she thought. During the summer they still owled each other constantly and every single letter had been optimistic. This is weird. If she had such a grand time in Spain, then why does she have that miserable look on her face?
She followed Lily up the stairs and when she arrived she saw her already on her bed, clothes unchanged, and her stomach facing the bed.
Jen walked up to her bed and sat down carefully.
"Lils?" she asked softly.
"Hmmm?" Lily murmured.
"What happened to you in Spain? You haven't been yourself lately."
Lily stiffened at what she said. Jen could tell from her eyes when she sat up properly and faced her that she was under great strain. She never saw Lily like this. The closest to this was the time when she had to learn the Spanish language, the history and culture of Spain, and study for their year-end exams, which was becoming harder as another year passes by. But now, how serious could this be?
Lily looked out the window and saw a picturesque view of a full moon shining brightly. She knew that if there was one person that she could trust, it would be this person sitting beside her.
"What happened in Spain?" Jen urged.
"Actually," Lily began, "nothing really happened in Spain. I had a splendid time there. Well, I did until my last day there. I—we—" she stopped, searching for the right words to say. "We were given a despidida party, something like a farewell party in honor of us. It was all going fine when I was introduced to this—this man named James Potter and Sirius Black and—"
"Wait!" Jen interrupted, "Don't talk so fast. Who were you introduced to?"
"James Potter and Sirius Black," Lily said brusquely, as if she couldn't wait any longer and needed to say it all out at once. "Very arrogant men. They act disrespectfully to others especially to my father. Made fun of him behind his back. But I don't know what got into me, but I found it amusing. Then that man Black said something that involved me and Potter shushed him and together they left me alone in the room. And, because of my stupidity and utter curiosity, I followed them. But they were too fast. So by the moment I reached the garden, they were nowhere to be found. Since I was tired from running around following those two imbeciles, I sat down and, 'lo and behold! Guess who had the nerve to come to me and try to talk things out?"
Jen was so astounded by Lily's fury and great speed in talking that she was almost scared of her. "Your—your dad?" she said meekly.
"No!" she boomed, "Potter! He said some things that, I believe, he thought would make me at ease with him. And wouldn't you know it, I fell for his trap! I even flirted openly with him! He must have been desperately holding his laughter at my lack of experience and ignorance. Oh fell for him, alright! I fell for his foolish trap and almost kissed him!"
Jen gasped. Lily had never kissed anyone in her own life! This man must be an expert to have Lily almost kiss him. She the only one from the four of us who has the ability to control herself, she thought.
Lily was exhaling deeply when she finished her last statement, then, with another deep breath, she said softly, "I didn't kiss him, though. I heard something that made me stop."
"What was it you heard?" Jen whispered, matching Lily's tone.
"My father's voice. He announced that I was engaged to that self-loving, son of a bitch bastard who was standing right in front of me." Lily said brokenly, her head hung low.
This is unfair, Lily thought to herself. Why, of all people, has it have to happen to me?
She remembered that night, a night she would never, ever forget in her life…
She remembered pulling away from his arms as soon as she'd heard her father's announcement. At first she didn't want to believe it.
"Wha—at did my father—say?" she croaked. James looked at her with his soft brown eyes probing into hers.
"He said we're engaged." He replied shortly.
"What?!?!?" she exclaimed. "How could we be engaged? We just met!" she looked at him speculatively. "How long did you know this?"
"Since I was six."
He noticed her gasp with shock, then added, "But I didn't know who I was engaged to until yesterday afternoon."
How could he? How could my father be so unjust? I practically lived all my life in sacrifice just to please him and this is all I get? A marriage? What is wrong with the world today? Lily deliberated.
When James saw her worried frown, his heart warmed with hurt at her reaction to the situation and said soothingly, "I know this hard for you, but we have to learn to accept this. This—this engagement has been decided since the day you were born. My parents and yours were close acquaintances who owed each other favors. When you were brought up in this world, this favor became an arrangement. We are to be married as soon as you graduate from Hogwarts."
"What??" she almost screamed in rage, "I can't accept this! I don't want to get married as soon as I finish Hogwarts. I want to make use of all the things I learned from there. That place is practically my home because I've never been in my real home in almost five years. The thought of leaving it and making no use of what I learned would be utterly impossible to me. I plan to be an auror. If not, then a mediwitch. Marriage is of no consequence to me at the moment."
"You can still apply your knowledge even if we are married. You could use it to clean the house in no time—"
"Is that what you think of us women?" she interrupted, "Housewives? We're just those people who clean the house, cook the food and please the man of the house, in other words, you? If that is what you think then I think that this marriage is out of the ques—"
"That is not what I think!" he said, frustrated. "I'm not good with words when it comes to comforting others, alright? I don't think women are treated as housewives. I know for a fact that women are ought to be treated equally with men. Listen," he pleaded, "I know this comes as a shock to you at first, alright?"
"But—"
"Shush!" he said, "But we will just have to accept this. Whether you like it or not. When I was reminded of this engagement yesterday, do you think I was joyful? Thankful that I'm finally going to be married?" he looked at her face, searching for an answer. When there was none, he continued, "No! I reacted the same way as you did! But I realized that maybe, just maybe, if I get to meet you, maybe she really could be the one for me, and you know what? After getting to know you much more tonight, maybe you could be the one." He stared into her eyes, tenderness swelled within him. He could see that she felt the same for him. The heat radiating from the two of them was strong that it compelled James to raise his hand to cup her cheek. Lily's eyes softened for a moment, then a fiery spark emanated yet again.
"But," she spoke softly, breaking eye contact with him, "Why? Don't you have someone in your life who you think is also important? Haven't you ever had someone with whom you love back at home, and love you back too?"
His eyes hardened at her words, and his hand immediately from her cheek.
"No, I don't." he said stonily. "I did know some people who I cared for, but I realized they weren't meant for me. So I waited for someone like you. But I guess you already have that special someone in your heart. But to tell you the truth, it wouldn't be possible for you and that 'special someone' to end up together because, as we all know, we are going to end up together." With that, he left, leaving her alone in the moonlit garden.
Both furious and miserable at his coolness towards her and her stupidity, she sat down, silent tears flowing down her cheeks, wallowing in self-pity for the life she is about to live after Hogwarts and pouring out her grief and sorrow for the miserable life she would be leading soon hereafter.
A/N: I'm soooo sorry for the really long delay! But if you were in my place, you'd be having difficulty inserting this in your schedule. Anyways, I hope it's long enough. Whew! This took me almost three weeks to finish! I can't wait for school break! Oh, by the way, thanks a lot lot lot for reviewing! More than fifty reviews! I'm sooo happy!!!!!! Anyways, it's getting really late and I have school tomorrow so I have to go! PLEASE REVIEW REVIEW REVIEW!
SMILE!!!!! :-)