Ino

Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto. Masashi Kishimoto does, even though he cheated in checkers! In the meantime, I own S.E., the Hair Police and Riyo.

I just got a review on the chapter I did on Neji, and I'm angry! PEOPLE, READ THE SUMMARY! DO NOT TAKE THIS FIC SERIOUSLY, GOD DAMMIT!

Grrr...they really need to read and not take things SO seriously...

Okay, now I need ideas for Chouji...he'll be next...muwhahaha...

Warning: Uhh...OOCness? Don't flame me, and PLEASE don't take this fic seriously.

"Have you found Gaara yet?" S.E. asked Riyo, one of her security people.

"Sorry S.E., no sign of him."

"Thanks anyway. Keep searching!" S.E. ordered, snacking on a donut.

Riyo nodded, then left.

"I'll find you Gaara….hm? Oh? Oh! Hello! I'm S.E., your hitman-I mean announcer- for Know Your Stars: Naruto Style! Our next guest is none other than Yamanaka Ino!" S.E. announced, flipping on the microphone.

Ino came walking in.

"Hello? Anyone here?" Ino yelled.

S.E. slapped her head.

"I am. Got your invitation?"

Ino, still not sure about where the voice was, showed it up in the air.

"Good. NOW SIT!" S.E. bellowed.

Ino looked around.

"I don't see a chair."

"Yeah you do!"

A chair popped up.

Ino sat in it.

"Know your stars, know your stars, know your stars…."

"Wait! Was Sasuke here?"

S.E. twitched her eye.

"WHY IS EVERYONE OBSESSED WITH SASUKE!" She roared.

"He's the best!" Ino cheered.

"Ino…when no one is looking…she steals Chouji's chips…."

Ino gasped.

"Why would I steal chips! I'm trying to watch my figure, not gain weight!" Ino yelled.

"Poor Ino…hey Ino! What kind of chips do you like?"

"I don't like chips!"

"Yeah you do!"

"No!"

"Yes!"

"No!"

"Yes!"

"OOOOOH! CATFIGHT!" A random person from the audience yelled out.

S.E. looked at the person.

"SECURITY!"

"No! Not the happy hotel….not again!"

Sweat drops.

"Ino…she dyes her hair with bleach!"

Ino dropped her mouth.

"That's not right!"

"Yeah, not to me. I can't believe you do that! We need to call the Hair Police!" S.E. randomly pulled out a cell phone and began dialing up the Hair Police.

"But my hair was naturally this color!"

"Hair Police, this is S.E.! I've got a bad case of bleached hair!"

"Are you even listening to me?"

"Huh? What did you say?"

Ino gave her an angry face.

"I did not bleach my hair!"

"Yes. You did. Stop denying!" S.E. said.

"I hate you!"

"The Hair Police should be here in about twenty minutes!" S.E. exclaimed.

All of a sudden, Lee burst through the door.

"HI! IT'S ME, THE BEAUTIFUL GREEN BEAST OF KONOHA!"

"Aaagh!" S.E. shouted.

"I saw a bunch of people clad in red with shirts saying 'Hair Police'!" Lee said.

"Good for you, Sasquatch. Now…OUT! Before I get an organized group of hitmen after you!" S.E. threatened.

Lee folded his arms.

"I'll be back again, with all my youth and-,"

"SPARE MY EARS!" S.E. shouted.

He left.

"He does that all the time?" Ino asked, a little freaked out by Lee's outburst.

"Unfortunately, yes Ino."

Silence.

"Ino…she has a pool filled with mayonnaise.."

A lot of people gasped.

"Ewww!" Ino said.

"I know, Ino! How could you do something so unsanitary!"

"No, that's wrong! I don't have a pool filled with mayonnaise!" Ino spoke.

"Ino…she's melting…"

Ino looked at herself.

"I'm not. You must be hallucinating!"

"Ino! You're dripping all over the place! I just had this place cleaned…" S.E. sighed.

"I'm not melting! Stop lying!"

S.E. took in a deep breath.

"Now you know…the chip stealing, hair bleaching, mayonnaise pool owning melting girl…."

"That's not true!"

"Now you know…Yamanaka Ino…"

"I'm leaving!"

"Try not to steal chips!" S.E. warned.

"I don't steal chips!" Ino shouted.

"Riiiight Ino. Riiiight…." S.E. shook her head

Then, right after Ino left, the Hair Police came in.

"We likerecieved a call saying someone, like, totally bleaches their hair. Who like is this girl?" One of the officers said, putting on makeup.

"Er...sorry, she just left that way," S.E. pointed.

The Hair Police officer nodded.

"Like, thank yah! C'mon gals, we, like, got a code 027799! I, like, repeat, code 027799!" She lead the way out the door, followed by the other Hair Police.

S.E. shuddered.

"I feel sorry for Ino when she meets them...tsk tsk...ooh! DONUT!" S.E. pounced on a donut.

S.E.: I wonder how Ino is doing.

Chi: The Hair Police is creepy...I can't believe people talk like that...

Natasha: I know -shudders-

S.E.: Why is everyone shuddering?