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Edit: Fixed the lied/lay grammar :) Thanks for pointing it out, encyser! That's what I get for not proof-reading!
Disclaimer: Do not own Slayers or any of its wondrous characters
Chapter Five
Filia ran a hand along the tent's coarse fabric, hesitating before its opening. Her shoulders itched, a bead of sweat sliding down the back of her neck. She felt naked and vulnerable without her heavy armor, the golden metal resting back within her own tent—even her mace remained behind... If the demons were to attack then she'd be forced to rely only on her holy magic... But even with that risk hovering over her, she knew she'd never be able to enter the tent armed and battle-ready... It would seem sacrilegious... Wrong and cruel...
Heaving a tired sigh, Filia finally pushed the flap aside, blinking at the soft glow of weak illumination spells—she forced her face into a serene smile, struggling not to allow the sorrow and pity to overwhelm her features. After all these people had suffered, it would be wrong to place anymore pain upon their shoulders... Especially reminders of the war looming outside the tent's fragile walls.
Cots upon cots of wounded soldiers lied before her, some quiet and still–their eyes staring blankly ahead, while others fidgeted, heart-wrenching moans tearing at her ears. Ahead, a dozen white-robed healers moved about the soldiers, faces haggard and pale, as they continued to conjure healing spell after healing spell. Nearby, one healer faltered, lips parting in a painful gasp, the light in her hands dying. Only quick reflexes on Filia's part saved the healer from a collision with hard earth, inhumanly strong dragon arms lifting the light woman, leading her to an empty cot.
"You've overworked yourself again." Filia lowered her, watching as trembling hands pushed back the robe's hood, strands of bluish-purple hair falling across her pale cheeks.
A soft, gentle smile struggled to find its way across the healer's lips, dark circles shadowing her fair skin. "They need my help... I can't just leave them, Miss Filia."
Filia sighed, looking away from the other priestess, hands pushing up the sleeves of her simple blue tunic. "I'll take over while you rest, Sylphiel." She glanced down at the tired healer, eyes darkening at the sad sight Sylphiel made, "But promise me you'll rest. At least for a little while."
Sylphiel's gaze widened, weak fingers clutching uselessly at the dragon's shirt, "But, Miss Filia, you can't! If they attack, you'll need your strength!"
Filia gently pried Sylphiel's all too human fingers from the fabric, her immortal features infinitely sad and resigned, "If they attack, Sylphiel, we will need your strength, as well..." Leaving the distraught priestess, Filia walked once more toward the occupied cots, skin already tingling with the presence of magic.
The other healers only shot her the slightest of glances before moving aside, allowing her to take her place at a soldier's cot, fingers glowing with unearthly magic. Staring down at the young human male's face, Filia felt her heart ache—she didn't know his name... He had probably fought under her orders and, yet, she didn't even know his name... Disgusted with herself, Filia placed her healing hands against his wounded chest, eyes closing as she spoke the simple incantation.
"White flow,
The healing power,
Recovery!"
The familiar rush of magic left Filia slightly breathless, power pouring over the soldier until his wounds closed, the stain of blood being the only indication of his previous pain. Smiling slightly, Filia watched as the man's eyes fluttered open, deep brown orbs blinking blearily before catching sight of her elvish face.
"Captain? What...?"
Filia placed a cool, soothing hand against his forehead, "Shhh... Rest. There'll be plenty of time for talk later. Sleep." The simple command echoed throughout the man's head, magic pulsing through his veins until he slipped under the spell, eyes closing in a peaceful slumber. Satisfied that he was indeed sleeping, Filia's smile slipped away, a heavy sigh shaking her form, as she turned.
Another cot, another soldier, another spell...
An endless rhythm of heal, smile, sleep... An endless parade of human and dragon, but mostly human—some familiar, most not, and she wondered if it really mattered that she knew less than ten names out of the hundred lying there... She wondered if he knew all the names of his soldiers or if he didn't care...
She wondered if she was becoming more and more like him every passing day...
"Recovery..."
Filia's shoulders slumped forward, her vision blurry–shapes dancing dizzily before her. The newly revived soldier joyfully patted his leg, unable to believe the miracle that had appeared so incredibly before his eyes. Vaguely, Filia realized he must have been born behind the barrier if magic so relatively common shocked him so... But really she found herself not caring about his reaction–the world was spinning deliriously, leaving her to stumble and clench her eyes shut, willing it to stop.
"Filia! FILIA! Damn it!" Small hands grasped her arms, leading her away from the cots and soldiers—away from the pain and after-effects of war... All of this because of the monsters, all of this because of him...
"How many did she heal?" A familiar voice laced with familiar irritation, hands forcing her to lay down, her eyes refusing to open---she didn't want to see anymore bleeding soldiers... She didn't want to heal another nameless human only to live with the knowledge that tomorrow he'd probably die...
"All of them, ma'am. We tried to stop her, but she wouldn't listen! I don't think she even heard us..."
"Oh, Miss Filia..." Different hands now, pressing against her cheek–warm and comforting, a voice so tender that she nearly cried.
"I'm fine..." She forced her eyes to open, lifting herself into a shaky sitting position. To her left, Lina Inverse turned glowing red eyes on her, her small frame nearly shaking with rage.
"Like hell you are! How could you be so stupid! First Sylphiel, now you! Are you trying to kill yourself! Because if you are, there are better ways to die! Like on the field!"
"Lina!" Horrified, Amelia pressed a hand against her mouth, watching the nearly panting sorceress with painfully wide eyes. "Don't say things like that!"
Regret flickered across Lina's features before she forced her lips into a scowl, "Don't do this again, Filia. We need you."And Filia could hear the unspoken fact behind her words: We need you—more than them, more than any of the soldiers lying within that tragic little tent. Simple words, weighty words, that pressed upon all three's shoulders until the dragon felt it nearly impossible to breathe and she could taste the salt of Amelia's unshed tears in the air... And staring into Lina's pixy-like face, those wild, red curls dancing around her features like a living flame, Filia could see the price such words cost the sorceress—despite all her talk, Lina did care about life...
Sometimes she feared the sorceress cared too much...
And sometimes it scared her that maybe she didn't care enough anymore...
"It'll be alright, Lina..." Filia wrapped her hand around the sorceress's, Lina's ruby eyes unwilling to meet her gaze. "I won't push myself like that again. I promise." And though Lina Inverse refused to look her way, her fingers closed tightly around the dragon's before pulling away.
"Good," a familiar, if slightly forced, grin stretched across Lina's lips, one hand lightly tapping Filia's forehead before the dragon could protest. "Now, sleep."
Filia gasped, shooting straight up, eyes wild and frantic—searching her room for wounded soldiers and Lina's glowing red eyes, relieved to find only open boxes and bundles of clothes. Slowly, one trembling hand reached for the bridge of her nose, pinching the skin with a deep frown. Her other hand spastically clutched the bed sheets, chest moving up and down in painful gasps. She had fallen asleep...
"God..." She gave her skin one final pinch before rubbing her hand across her eyes, peering into the shadows. Slowly, Filia stood, walking toward the private bathroom, mind still dazed and befuddled... One minute she could remember lying in her bed, eyes focused determinedly on the ceiling and then she was in some terrible war strewn land... All those men and women... In pain... Suffering and the feeling that she was to blame for it all...
Splashing cold water on her face, Filia stared into her reflection–water dripping down her pale skin. Long blonde hair hung around a face nearly too beautiful, sapphire eyes hurt and shining as she blinked aside droplets clinging desperately to her lashes. She looked... fine... At first glance, no one would guess the troubled thoughts running through her mind or the pain scarring her both mentally and physically...
Glancing at the simple table-clock, Filia rolled her shoulders, stretching her arms out over her head. It was nearly time for her to get ready for classes and she definitely didn't want to risk having another dream... Though, on the bright side, this one had been slightly better than her usual nightmares... Usually, she was the one inflicting pain, not healing it... If not for the gruesome vision of poor, writhing soldiers, their bodies torn and clawed by some unknown force... Never mind, it had been as terrible as her other ones...
Filia shuddered, twisting the knobs to her shower, quickly undressing before jumping in front of the hot water. Hurriedly, rinsing soap from her long hair, Filia struggled to put the dream from her mind—she should never have fallen asleep... How could she have been so foolish? What if she had screamed? It wouldn't have been the first time a nightmare affected her so horribly and the thought that Sylphiel or Zelgadiss might have heard her...
Filia stepped out of the shower, drying off with a simple, fluffy white towel—dabbing gently at her back. Glancing over her shoulder, Filia caught sight of her reflection–back exposed to the simple glass... For a second, she remained frozen, eyes widening till white overwhelmed blue–her gaze like that of a deer caught in headlights, terrified and blinded... Then she jerked away, towel wrapped firmly around her body as she fled from the bathroom, panting heavily before collapsing against the floor.
A tear slipped past her clenched lids, falling into the carpet without leaving even the tiniest of marks. Her throat burned, a scream clawing its way forth—pushed back by sheer willpower, her hands sinking into rough, braided carpeting. Instead of screaming, her mouth began to move in a terrible whisper, her eyes opening only to stare forward, unfocused and distant. "No more, no more, no more, no more, no more, no more, no more, NO MORE, NO MORE. NO MORE!"
And then she did fall forward, face pressed against the carpet, as she sobbed–quiet, heaving gasps, salt dripping into her mouth, staining the floor...
"Did you sleep well, Miss Filia?" Sylphiel watched the other girl, both walking quietly through the mansion's east wing. A simple purple backpack adorning her back, her hair loose and straight around her pleasant features. Beside her, Filia carried only a single notebook, a bell-like white skirt swinging with each step. The blonde had twisted her hair into a simple bun, two pink chopsticks shoved haphazardly into the bundle.
Filia blinked at the question, eyes focused on trying to remember the numerous twists and turns Sylphiel had led her down, "Oh, yes." She smiled, eyes seemingly light and carefree, "Very well! You, Miss Sylphiel?"
Sylphiel faltered slightly at the sugary tone, but quickly regained her pleasant smile, "Well, thank you." They stopped before an open door, other students already standing inside, the teacher obviously not present from the way they laughed and shouted–several balls of seemingly pure light were being thrown back and forth causing Filia to halt, mesmerized by the show of magic.
"Here we are." Sylphiel offered unnecessarily, leading the way inside, easily ducking a lighting spell. Seeing the amazed look on Filia's expression, the priestess smiled reassuringly, "You'll get used to it in no time, Miss Filia."
A ball of light sped past and Filia's free hand suddenly shot out, catching it easily–watching as the magic faded, dying within her grasp. She frowned, lines of frustration creasing her features, hand burning as she struggled to revive the light she'd so carelessly destroyed. "Why... I can't..." Filia felt panic prick her chest, turning toward Sylphiel's knowing gaze, "I thought... I thought I could..."
"It takes time, Miss Filia." Sylphiel reached for Filia's empty hand, her own gaze becoming focused and determined, "Light!" With a soft crackle, another ball of light hovered only inches from the blonde's open palm, moving into Sylphiel's hand with ease. "You'll be doing it in no time."
Not responding, Filia sat down, troubled by the sudden display... Why had she reached for the strange magical globe? Why had she thought it would be easy to recreate that simple magic? Why had she even wanted to! After all this time of running and refusing to admit the power that rested within her, she suddenly wanted to go about waving her hands, creating useless balls of light!
And why hadn't she been able to? She'd felt so confident... So sure that she could accomplish such an easy spell...
Spell? Were they spells? What had Zelas called it? Power? Energy? Magic?
Amelia called it magic, the younger girl had been able to heal with the slightest wave of her hand, easing all of Filia's aches and pains with a few well chosen words...
Just like in her dream...
"She's late again." Lina settled into the desk ahead of Filia, propping her feet into the empty desk in front of her. "Probably off watering the plastic flowers again."
Stealthily. Zelgadiss slipped into the seat behind Sylphiel, as close to the shadows as possible. "Or fishing in the aquarium... Wasn't that her excuse last time?"
Lina nodded slightly, not bothering to turn and face the chimera, as she continued to watch the door. A slight frown creased the redhead's forehead, feet sliding to the floor, as she leaned forward. Filia arched an eyebrow at the girl's behavior, unaware of the growing smirk on Zelgadiss's hidden features.
"Looking for someone, Lina? Missing a certain blonde?" Despite the cloth covering his mouth, the chimera's teasing tone rang loud enough for the three girls to hear and Lina flared red–though whether from anger or embarrassment, Filia wasn't sure, as Gourry chose to walk in that moment, carrying several tall boxes. Behind him stood a woman of Amelia's height, her hair long and light blue, hanging down her back in a tumble of curls. Oddly, she seemed to be dressed in an evening gown that sparkled and flashed in the lighting spells' glow.
"The fish want to play, class!" The woman clapped her hands together, voice dreamy and child-like, ignoring the blonde who struggled to stand beside her, arms loaded with what appeared to be three chests of fish. "Partners! We'll have a dance, a fishy dance!" With that, she danced from the room, twirling with a swirl of her inappropriate dress.
Filia blinked frantically, mouth falling open in confusion, "What...?"
"She wants us to get in pairs for dissection, then head down to the lab to begin actual class." Lina rolled her eyes, "If she wanted us to do lab work, why didn't she tell us before we all came here like idiots?" Gathering her belongings, the redhead stood with a huff, eying the tottering Gourry with an amused grin. "Having fun, Gourry?"
"Ya know," the blonde shifted the weight in his arms, peering around the ice-chests, "you could help me."
She waved a hand, "Yeah, yeah. Hey, Zel, help Gourry."
Shooting the sorceress an exasperated glare, Zelgadiss scowled, "What am I? Your slave?"
Lina smirked, one sharp tooth hanging mischievously over her bottom lip, "Sounds good to me! Bye, boys! Have fun!" Darting from the classroom after the other students, the sorceress's laughter could be heard echoing in the hallway.
"Hey, Zelgadiss?" The chimera sighed at the hopeful look in Gourry's blue gaze, holding his arms out stiffly.
"I hate you..."
"Thanks Zel!" Happily, Gourry slid the top chest off and into the chimera's arms, leaving him with only two fishy chests to carry—his arms greatly relieved to get rid of the weight.
Sylphiel eyed the still massive load in Gourry's arms, eyes crinkling in concern, "Will you be alright, Gourry dear?"
He grinned, nodding over his lesser load, "Don't worry, Sylphiel, I've got it!" His eyes narrowed slightly, as he moved toward the door, Lina's somewhat maniacal laughter still ringing down the hall, "That Lina..." He shook his head once, long blonde hair swinging at the motion, the slight frown disappearing as quickly as it appeared, his voice softening slightly, "She's hopeless. She better save me a seat!" Gourry glanced down into Sylphiel's upturned face, "You better hurry, Sylphiel, or everybody will be partnered up before you get there!" Whistling, Gourry headed in the direction of their fellow classmates, unable to recognize the quiet longing on Sylphiel's features.
"But... I was hoping... you might be my...partner... Gourry dear..." But the blonde was already too far away to hear her, his feet carrying him as quickly as possible toward Lina–thoughts of retribution for her cruel abandonment running through his head. Sylphiel's hand dropped from where it had hovered in the air, reaching out for the blonde man unconsciously. Beside her, Filia fidgeted uncomfortably, watching the sad emotions flickering across the other girl's face with discomfort.
"Miss Sylphiel?" Filia cautiously placed a hand against her shoulder, sending a shudder down Sylphiel's back. "Um... I need a partner, if you don't mind... And a translator..." She forced a joking grin, the act of comforting another human being foreign and odd after a year of being alone. "I'm afraid I don't quite understand the teacher."
When Sylphiel turned around, her face seemed happy and carefree–only the slight sheen of tears indicating her troubled heart. "Of course, Miss Filia. I sometimes forget how confusing Miss Dolphin's way of teaching can be to newcomers. I would love to be your partner." She motioned down the hall, walking even as she spoke, "The lab's only a few doors down, I'm sure everyone's waiting for us."
Filia wondered if she should ask about Sylphiel and Gourry—if she should show interest in Sylphiel's broken heart... Or would that merely be cruel and unnecessary? Unsure, Filia decided to remain quiet, suddenly realizing how much she had missed out on in her isolation at her former school... Realizing the terrifying task of returning to normalcy that loomed before her... Would she ever be able to interact with others without feeling this overwhelming sense of self-consciousness?
Both girls were so deeply imbued in their own thoughts, neither noticed the chimera's silent footsteps behind them, a contemplative look on his stony features...
"All that fish and she wouldn't let us eat a single one!" Lina stormed from the classroom, hands clenched into angry fists. "What a waste!"
Behind her, Gourry easily shouldered both his books and the redhead's, nodding his agreement. "And after we prepared them so nicely, too!" He caught up with the steaming sorceress, disappointment clouding his usually carefree features. "What's the point of a cooking class, if you don't get to eat what you make?"
Lina swung a hand carelessly at the blonde, her own growing disappointment at a nice fishy snack causing her not to care much when the swordsman dodged the blow. "Idiot! That wasn't a cooking class!"
Large, blue eyes blinked confusedly down at her, "It wasn't?"
"I give up! We've been taking this class all year and you can't remember that its biology, not cooking!"
Filia sniffed at her hands, turning slightly green at the fishy smell clinging to her flesh, "Ugh... It won't come off..." Her stomach twisted in protest and she quickly dropped her hands, struggling to distract herself from the growing nausea... After her less than pleasant wake-up, gutting a fish had been the last thing she'd wanted to do... Watching the bickering couple ahead of her, Filia motioned slightly, catching Zelgadiss's attention, "Are they usually like this?"
The chimera frowned, stony fingers picking at a fish scale that had somehow managed to puncture itself in his hair. "The fighting?" Flicking the scale aside, Zelgadiss nodded, "It's a ritual between the two..."
"But arguing all the time? It must get old after awhile." Filia shot a quick glance toward Sylphiel, the other girl remaining oddly silent, her gaze focused on the ground as the trio followed behind Lina and Gourry–the couple now bursting into laughter over something most likely trivial and idiotic.
Zelgadiss shrugged, "For some people, yeah, but Gourry's got a lot of patience in that thick skull of his. Not many people would be able to handle Lina's constant complaints."
"Gourry dear is a very kind man..." Sylphiel's voice seemed like a whisper on the wind, those deep, sad eyes staring into the blonde's oblivious back. "He understands Miss Lina... He always has..." Her mouth suddenly closed, eyes flickering toward the listening blonde and chimera, face slightly strained and flushed, as if she had revealed some deep, dark secret.
"Mister Zelgadiss!" Amelia to the rescue, Filia thought, turning to watch the younger girl jog toward them–a backpack slapping against her back with each wild gesture. Suddenly, the girl pitched forward, arms spinning wildly as she struggled to catch herself, only to land face-first on the cold, marble floor. "Ow..."
"Miss Amelia!"
"Amelia!"
Zelgadiss sighed, rubbing his temple, as the smaller girl sat back, one hand gently massaging her bruised nose. "That's why you shouldn't run in the halls, Amelia..."
Tears shone in the younger girl's gaze, as she stared up into the chimera's seemingly emotionless features—her bottom lip quivering slightly before she forced a grin, blinking away the tears with a careless laugh. "You're right, Mister Zelgadiss!" Ignoring the other girls' offered hands, Amelia jumped to her feet, posing with a slight flourish. "Ta-da!"
Filia shot a cold glare in the chimera's direction, surprised at the anger rolling within her chest. There had been no reason to be so cold to the small girl! Why was he always trying to hide his feelings? Why did he have to make Amelia suffer because of his own cowardice! How long before he realized this incessant need to find his cure was pushing away the one woman who meant the most to him?
What cure?
Filia blinked, realizing the group had continued on without her, Amelia talking animatedly to both Sylphiel and Zelgadiss about her World Welfare Program. White sandals slapped against the smooth stone, as she ran after the first people she had felt a genuine connection to since the incident. Sylphiel offered Filia a quick smile before returning her attention to the wildly gesturing former princess, "Miss Luna says I can start putting up fliers around the school! Finally, the power of truth and justice will ring clearly throughout these halls! All hearts will pulse with one single goal—to promote good and righteousness, to stop the corrupt ways of evil, to–."
"We get the picture! Yeesh..." Lina ran a hand through her hair, "I'm surprised Luna gave you the okay. After all, she's not exactly justice-material." A devious grin crept its way across her lips, "She's more like the corrupt evil you're always blabbing about."
"Oh, am I?" Luna titled her head at the sudden silence, eyes narrowed and focused on her wide-eyed, trembling sister. Slowly, Lina turned, face draining of all coloring, teeth chattering at the sight of her ominous big sister standing so close.
"Sis!"
Luna leaned forward, nearly nose to nose with the quivering Lina, "Aren't you suppose to be in class?" Monotonous and stoic, but the words shot a cold arrow of fear throughout the sorceress.
"Y-y-y-y-es..."
One fine purple eyebrow arched, "Then get going."
Lina shuddered, eyes widening even further before suddenly spinning around, snatching Gourry's arm in a tight hold, "COME ON, JELLYFISH! MOVE!"
"LINA!" Gourry screeched, as he was pulled down the hall—leaving the others to only watch as the blur known as Lina Inverse and Gourry Gabriev disappeared from sight.
Without another word, Luna shot the others a cool look, her eyes lingering momentarily on Filia–sending a shiver up the blonde's spine–before turning away, her feet barely making a sound. Once out of sight, the remaining students slumped forward with a heavy, relieved sigh. Amelia shifted slightly at the sudden tension, backing away from the other three with a slight smile. "I oughta be going to class, too. I'll see you later!" She waved once before running back in the direction she'd come, turning a corner wildly—a short squeal and loud Ow signaling another collision with the floor.
Zelgadiss winced slightly, "I'm always perpetually surprised that she's not continually black and blue..."
"To class, Mister Zelgadiss, Miss Filia?" Sylphiel offered, one hand fixing the strap of her heavy backpack.
"To class, Sylphiel, before Lina destroys it in her fear."
Filia dragged her feet after the others, sighing slightly as she glanced once again at the watch adorning her right wrist. Her last class before lunch and then...
Zelas.
Sighing again, Filia stumbled forward, as a hand suddenly collided painfully with the back of her head. "Ow! Miss Lina!"
Lina scowled at the blonde, "Stop moping! Zelas may be bad, but she's nowhere near as horrible as Luna! So, stop sighing and get moving!" She grinned, clapping a hand against Filia's back in a much less painful slap, "Any ways, lunch is next! You can't be sad with lunch approaching!"
"Yeah. Lunch is my favorite class!" Gourry glanced over his shoulder, dopey grin plastered across his face. "Don't ya think, Lina?"
Lina ignored the slight slip, instead nodding excitedly, "Yep! You've got something right for once, Gourry!"
Still rubbing her aching head, Filia sidestepped away from the drooling duo, bumping into Zelgadiss's rock-solid chest. "Ow..." She glanced up at the chimera, "Sorry, Mister Zelgadiss."
"No problem. I'd run if those two started talking about food, too." He grinned down at her, the cloth from earlier pulled away from his face, the strange tan hood lowered so the silvery locks of metal hair shimmered in the florescent lights. So close to the handsome chimera, Filia felt her cheeks flush slightly, quickly jerking away–her heart hammering wildly within her chest... Now, that she thought about it, it had been so long since she'd been around a man—especially ones as handsome as Gourry and Zelgadiss... Once, the boys at her old school had flirted shamelessly with her, but that had all changed after the rumors...
And, despite his strange appearance, Zelgadiss was still very handsome... And how could he mind the strange power flowing through her veins when the same magic had to exist somewhere within him?
But her mind faltered at the idea... Handsome, Zelgadiss might be, but some distant part of her told her there was more to the chimera... Determined and focused, narrow-minded and self-hating, scarred and distrustful—the chimera needed someone kind and gentle, innocent and pure... Someone like the girl who had offered her friendship without knowing a single thing about her... who'd used precious energy to heal her pain before she'd even known her name...
Filia smiled, suddenly content with her decision—not really a decision, though... A fact. Her cheeks might have flushed and her heart may have sped up for a split second, but in her heart and mind, she knew Zelgadiss belonged to another... Just like the blonde swordsman walking only feet ahead of her... They belonged to other people, to Lina and Amelia... She knew that, beyond all else, she knew that simple fact.
"And who do you belong to, Fi-chan?"
She ignored the taunting voice, her smile fading as quickly as it had appeared. The others were heading into a room, the students here already seated and quiet–a calm figure standing before them. Eyes as golden as the sun turned to survey the group, nodding slightly at Lina and the other students, "Good day, students." Those golden, shimmering eyes landed on Filia and her eyebrows creased at the sudden shock she saw reflected inside his gaze. Then he seemed to gain control, simply motioning toward a seat beside Gourry. "Welcome, miss..."
"Filia, Filia Ryo." She offered quietly, setting down her notebook, trying to ignore the curious looks being sent her way–her voice trembled slightly, meeting his gaze with her own wild blue eyes. Her feet itched with the sudden desire to run, bolt from the classroom and never look back... Never stare into those odd, golden eyes...
Golden...
"Ryo..." The teacher paused, mouthing the name with something akin to sorrow. "I am glad to have you here, Miss Ryo. I am Milgazia." Then he turned, yellow strands barely moving at the gesture, his hand motioning to the chalkboard–one of the white pieces of chalk jumping into his hands. For a second, Filia thought his hand trembled slightly before grasping the chalk tightly, white powder staining his hands. "We were reviewing the basic outline..."
Filia's notebook remained closed, as she stared into the seemingly young teacher's back. Something warm and fiery began to burn its way up her calves, the sensation too hot to be called comforting. White fingers gripped the edge of her desk, eyes locked on those seemingly simple strands of blonde hair, swaying with every calculation he jotted across the board's black surface. Around her, lead scraped against clean paper, Gourry's questioning voice, Lina's angry response, even Sylphiel's quiet explanation—all background noise to the thunder building within her...
"You are hereby excommunicated, stripped of all titles, and banished from all clans. Be glad we leave you with your life, traitor."
"TRAITOR!"
"DEMON'S WHORE!"
Zelgadiss watched as one tear then another slid past Filia's chin, landing against the desk's surface with the slightest of sounds. Soundlessly, her lips moved, repeating something that even his ears could not understand... But ahead of her, Milgazia suddenly faltered in his writing, back tensing as Filia raised her head–eyes so dark and deep, they appeared more black than blue. And then, he could finally understand her silent words, spoken in a voice much too old and ancient to belong to her young face.
"You betrayed me..."
And the world exploded around them.
The desk went first—wood showering the unfortunate students sitting in the front row, their mouths wide in shock and fear, as they scrambled to their feet–the flicker of shields surrounding their hastily moving forms. From his vantage point, Zelgadiss shoved his hands out, a shield surrounding both himself and the wide-eyed Sylphiel, as Filia stood–her hands reaching out for the still Milgazia—his own features composed, even serene, as he watched her advance.
Nearby, Zelgadiss heard Lina curse, one tiny hand grasping Gourry by the shirt as she floated mere inches off the ground, surveying the destruction with a critical and somewhat impressed eye. "Not as good as a fireball, but efficient, eh, Zel?" She landed beside the chimera, dropping the swordsman without a second thought. "She must really hate calculus." The sorceress jerked a finger toward the smoldering desk remains, both watching warily as the girl stopped only inches from Milgazia.
"We're on physics equations, Lina. Shows how well you pay attention." The chimera's shield continued to shine at full force, his face stoic despite his joking tone.
"Math's only good for one thing–counting money!" A glow was beginning to form between Lina's palms and Gourry eyed it anxiously from his position on the floor, "Oy... Lina..."
Ignoring their playful banter, Filia stared into Milgazia's calm face—her fingers burning with raw power. She wanted to reach out and touch him, hurt him, hug him, tear him apart... Confusion tore at her mind and the magic suddenly died in her hands, palms grasping her pounding head, as she shook once before collapsing to her knees, gritting her teeth at the sudden wave of pain flowing over her.
"I can't... Not yet... Not like this... Please..." She reached for one khaki encased leg, clutching the fabric, as she stared pleadingly into Milgazia's golden eyes. "Please."
And there was pain in his gaze—old, never truly forgotten pain... Then he was reaching down, fingers lightly touching her temple, "Sleep, child, sleep..."
And Filia slept...
"Miss Lina, that's Filia's! Stop eating it!"
"She's sleeping! How can she eat when she's unconscious!"
"Your concern for her is really overwhelming, Lina..."
"Hey! I didn't say I wasn't concerned! I'm a very caring person!"
"Ha! HEY! You can't conjure a fireball in here!"
Blinking, Filia dazedly listened to the voices hovering nearby, turning slightly to peer at the figures. Her forehead creased, as she watched Lina glower at Zelgadiss, a dangerous glow beginning to form between the redhead's hands, while the chimera looked a tad panicky, hands held defensively before his chest. "What... Miss Lina?" At the sound of her voice, the fireball died, the group turning toward the sitting blonde.
"Filia!" Amelia darted toward the girl's side, "Are you feeling alright? You didn't sleep very long..."
Long legs kicked aside the cot's thin sheet, eyes looking around the simple white room nervously. "Where am I? What happened?" Fear began to creep across her face, fingers twisting into the fabric of her skirt, "Something terrible happened..." Panic edged its way into her voice, " I did something terrible..."
Lina shrugged, "Can't say it was the best first impression."
"Miss Lina!" Amelia shot the redhead a scolding glance, as Zelgadiss scoffed–making sure to stand a safe distance from the irritable sorceress.
"I wouldn't worry about it, Filia. Blowing up a desk is nowhere near as bad as half the things she's done on a good day." The chimera jerked a finger toward the seething Lina, ignoring the angry looks she sent his way.
"What are you talking about! I don't blow up desks!"
Behind her, Gourry scratched his head, "Yes, you do, Lina. You blew up Dolphin's last week, remember?"
A hard blow to the head sent the blonde flying, Lina's terrifying form looming over him. "How come you remember that, but can't remember Dolphin teaches biology, not cooking class?"
Ignoring the chaos growing behind her, Amelia pushed a takeout box toward the still worried blonde, smiling kindly. "We brought you some lunch. The nurse says you can leave as soon as you're ready." Sheepishly, Amelia watched as Filia opened the box, arching her eyebrows in surprise at the sufficient lack of food. "Uh, Miss Lina and Mister Gourry kinda...got it... But I can go back and get you some more if you want!"
Filia shook her head, closing the box, "No, that's fine... I'm not really hungry..." Staring at her twisting fingers, the blonde shifted uncomfortably before the raven-haired girl. "Amelia... what happened?" Her voice came out low and soft, barely a whisper–the sound not showing the terrible fear and panic warring within her heart. "I remember feeling... fire..then nothing..."
Amelia glanced worriedly at Zelgadiss, meeting the chimera's contemplative gaze, "I wasn't there, Filia... I can only tell you what I heard..."
"That's really all you remember?" Filia glanced up at Zelgadiss, his blue eyes narrowing suspiciously.
"Mister Zelgadiss!" Amelia shot the man a glare, before facing Filia once again, taking the other girl's hand in her own, "It's understandable that you might not remember. I can remember when my powers first started to manifest, things would sometimes levitate or explode, it's only natural. And you have it so much harder, what with your powers trapped inside." She smiled reassuringly, "You really shouldn't worry, Filia. Everything will be just fine, you'll see!"
"You should listen to your classmate, Filia Ryo." A cool, smooth voice entered the fray, startling even the bickering couple into silence, as Zelas stepped into the room, eyeing them all with amusement. "How sweet, you've already made friends, Filia."
Amelia gasped, as Filia's hand suddenly tightened around her own, the blonde's eyes narrowing dangerously, as she watched her mentor step closer. "What are you doing here?" Harsh, angry words, spat more than spoken, as Filia suddenly jumped to her feet, releasing Amelia's throbbing hand.
"It's one, darling. Lesson time." Zelas smirked, all white teeth and red lips, and Filia once again felt that overwhelming sensation of wrongness... It seemed even stronger than before now that Zelas stood among the students, her cold violet gaze running over Lina and the others with interest. "I'm afraid I'm going to have steal her away, children. You don't mind, do you?"
Something sparked within Lina's gaze, her face remaining unconcerned and nonchalant, despite the way her heart began to pound. She waved a hand, "Nah, we got our own lessons to head to and we'll see her later." Lina met Zelas's gaze, "Won't we?" Nearby, Gourry stood tall and composed, one hand reaching for some non-existent blade, blue eyes focused and steely as they watched the blonde woman. With the slightest of shifts, the man managed to place himself between the sorceress and the blonde mentor, a smile still on his features, even as he sought to protect his ward.
Zelas's grin widened, as she watched the two, "Of course. Come along, Filia." With that, she turned, brushing aside Zelgadiss with a slight wave of her hand, arching an eyebrow at the stoic chimera before leaving the nurse's station, her heels clicking against marble flooring. She didn't bother to wait for Filia, merely strode in the direction of her office without a second glance... Leaving the seething blonde behind, hands clenched into tight fists, breath coming out in angry pants.
"You'd better be going, Filia." Amelia gave the girl a gentle nudge, slightly concerned about the odd scene that had just played out, but knowing she'd find no answers from the angry blonde. "We'll see you at supper, ok?"
Nodding stiffly, Filia ran a hand down her skirt, "Yes." And then she was storming from the room, leaving the others to watch her tense, jerky steps carry her down the hall after Zelas's swaying hips. "I hate that woman..."
Lina whistled, "What I wouldn't do to be a fly on the wall for those lessons!" She shot the others a quick grin, "Better get going, huh?" She shot them a slight wave, "See ya!" Then she was out the door, heading off toward her private lessons with Milgazia–as an advanced student, Lina had been given a private project, something she wouldn't reveal to the others, no matter how much they begged and pleaded.
"Bye, Miss Lina!" Amelia hesitated at the door, fingers nervously fidgeting with the bracelet she wore, "I hope Miss Filia is alright..." The girl jumped, as a heavy hand grasped her shoulder comfortingly, Zelgadiss moving around her so he could stand in the hall.
"She'll be fine. We'd better hurry, though, Amelia. You know, Luna doesn't like to be kept waiting." With a gentle smile, the chimera directed the girl in the right direction of their shamanic studies, the only class the two were able to share with one another, considering Amelia's one year gap in age. At the mention of their shared studies, Amelia's smile returned full-force, a bounce added to her step.
"Of course, Mister Zelgadiss!"
Leaving only Gourry behind, his eyes darting between the directions his friends had taken. "Oy... I forgot... Where do I go?"
"You made quite the commotion for dear Milgazia. Poor thing, he was quite distraught." Zelas smirked, lighting a cigarette with the tip of her finger, grinning as she watched Filia fidget in front of the closed door. "Such destructive qualities..."
Filia's eyes narrowed, goose bumps running up and down her arms, "I am not destructive!"
Zelas arched an eyebrow at the girl's venomous tone, "Seems I hit a nerve." She smiled, "How delightful!" The blonde pursed her lips, a thin stream of gray smoke staining the air. Filia struggled to calm her itching throat, the fumes reaching her even half way across the room... Or maybe it was just Zelas's very presence that burned at her throat, causing her stomach to roll in disagreement. "Are you ready to begin? Starting now, we won't be playing anymore."
"Playing!" The angry screech echoed around the room, as Filia shot forward, body quivering with rage, "You call yesterday PLAYING!"
Zelas blinked, a mockery of confusion darting across her pretty face, "Why, of course, darling. Today, we start the hard stuff." She grinned, rows of too white teeth flashing at the gesture, seeming almost inhumanly sharp in the room's dim lighting, "Today, we get to see what I have to work with."
Without another word, she turned from the fuming teenager, making her way toward the isolated section of the large room, pushing open the heavy metal door with barely an effort. "Are you coming?" Zelas didn't really expect an answer, instead walking into the room without turning to even watch the other girl's expression—she didn't need to look at Filia to feel the anger and sudden fear rolling off the girl.
Licking her lips, Zelas situated herself across the plastic-encased room, watching amusingly as Filia took first one then another shaky step, blue eyes painfully wide as she stared at the simple white room... Teeth sank into the girl's lower lip, a drop of blood staining her white teeth, and suddenly Filia stopped, arms wrapping around her trembling body, head shaking back and forth with such motion that her already damaged bun started to come undone, tendrils of hair surrounding her pale, scared face.
"I can't... I can't..."
"Of course, you can. It's just a room."
Filia squeezed her eyes shut, "You don't understand! I can't!"
Hands and hands and hands–pressed against her skin, emotionless and bodiless hands—reaching and grasping and not caring and then leaving and she wasn't sure which was worse–being with the hands or being alone... because it was dark and alone and oh so white and alone and she couldn't escape and when she screamed the hands sometimes came and sometimes didn't and she lost herself a bit each time they appeared with their needles and machines and slick, rubbery gloves...and she lost herself when they didn't come, too, because then she was alone with only the voices... talking and talking and talking... till she prayed for the hands and when the hands came, she prayed for the voices...
"I CAN'T!"
Violet eyes narrowed, ash falling to the ground, as Zelas suddenly threw her cigarette down, one black heel crushing the flimsy paper. Those incredibly long, sharp heels clicked against the floor, as she made her way slowly and steadily across the room, face twisted into an angry scowl. Bending, Zelas sank sharp, red fingernails into Filia's arm, yanking the kneeling girl off the floor, ignoring her sudden gasp of pain. "You will get up and you will go into that room. Do you understand me?" Inhumanly bright violet eyes met Filia's tearful gaze, the blonde continuing to shake her head wildly even as she hung at Zelas's mercy.
"No, no, no! I can't, I can't!" Horrible cries, whimpers of past pain, and despite the delicious taste, Zelas found herself disgusted by the crying girl, releasing her with a crash.
"After everything, you're going to let a few idiotic doctors destroy you..." Zelas scoffed, sneering at the pathetic scene, "Then, you're not worthy of my help. You'll die. You'll die just like all the others–pathetic."
"Pathetic..."
Filia's sobs began to die, her fingers clutching at the smooth floor.
"Do you want to die, Filia?"
"No..." A soft, barely audible whisper, but enough of one to drag Zelas's attention back toward the cowering girl.
"Get up and stop crying! Stop feeling sorry for yourself just because it's the easiest route! Remember who you are! Remember what you are! Now, get up!"
Rasing dark blue eyes, Filia met Zelas's smirking violet gaze, tears still streaming down her face even as she slowly stood, a determined, angry expression replacing the momentary fear and panic that had overwhelmed her. "I am not pathetic." Cold, hard, quiet words that broke the silence surrounding the two. Simple words that boiled Filia's blood and widened the smirk on Zelas's features.
"We'll see." Was all Zelas said before turning away, once again entering the safety room–not bothering to glance over her shoulder, as Filia took one then another stiff step inside, the metal door swinging shut behind her...
"Try again." Zelas paced the small room, watching as Filia huffed, her pale hands held out before her. Sweat beaded the girl's forehead, blue eyes shooting a dark, ugly look at the composed mentor.
"I have tried again! I've tried twenty times! It's not working!" With an angry, childish stomp, Filia threw her hands up, pulling the chopsticks from her falling hair, glaring at the useless pieces of wood.
"And you will continue to try until it does work." Zelas tapped her foot against the floor, a new cigarette brought to her painted lips. "Now, again."
For a few precious seconds, Filia's hands closed painfully tight around the chopsticks, contemplating the idea of murder by hair accessory before tossing the now broken sticks aside with a snarl. Forcing her palms out once again, Filia focused her attention on the air above them, trying to calm her irate breathing, as she struggled to remember the advice (taunting) Zelas had offered her earlier. Breathe. Focus. Feel the energy within. Now, grasp and—
"Light!" Filia was quickly beginning to hate the seemingly simple word, her eyes narrowing as once again light refused to appear within her grasp. "ARGH!"
Blowing out a complicated series of smoky shapes, Zelas tapped ash onto the ground. "You're not trying hard enough. You have to focus or," she strode forward, one hand rapping none-so-gently against Filia's temple, "is your little brain not capable of such a simple action?"
Gritting her teeth, Filia ducked away from the teacher's hands, rubbing at her head with a scowl. "I am focusing! You're not teaching it right!"
Instead of growing angry, Zelas merely shrugged, "Maybe. Now, try it again."
Growling, Filia held her hands out stiffly, taking in a deep breath–forcing her face to become serene and composed despite the anger growing inside her. Slowly, she began to breathe more easily, body relaxing as she counted mentally to herself, striving to ignore the nauseating presence of her 'mentor'. She just had to focus... Heat... She could remember the feel of heat... Heat every time right before something terrible happened... But nothing terrible would happen this time... If she just concentrated, the heat would build and there would be a nice, tiny, bouncing ball of light...
Just a nice, simple Lighting spell...
Squeezing her eyes shut, Filia licked her lips, reaching into herself for that strange core of magic... She could feel the heat–the fiery presence lurking within herself, darting just out of her grasp... She couldn't take hold of the actual core, but perhaps...maybe just a thread... Clenching her teeth, Filia focused on the growing heat, felt it slowly climb up her feet—this wasn't like before, where the heat came suddenly and blinding, but a slow, agonizing crawl that made her bones ache...
But just a little more... If she just...
There.
Filia's eyes snapped open, her voice loud and clear in the small room, "Light!"
Across the room, Zelas perked with interest, having felt the slow, steady buildup of magic in the air. She waited expectantly for the tiny ball of light to bloom within Filia's hands...
And waited... And waited...
Zelas blinked as a sudden wave of confusion and fear rushed over her, glancing toward the metal door and the world that lay outside before turning her attention once again toward the light-less Filia.
"AAAHHHHHHHH!" Filia grasped handfuls of her long, blonde hair, wishing it was another blonde's hair she held so firmly. "It's not working!"
Calmly running a hand through her own blonde locks, Zelas waved her cigarette nonchalantly, "It does seem to appear that way, doesn't it?" She pushed the metal door open, ignoring the incredulous look sent her way by the screaming girl. Outside, the teacher stretched languorously, "What tiresome work."
Filia slammed the metal shut, wrinkling her nose as the older woman stretched out across the black couch, her already scandalous skirt arching even higher, as she kicked one leg up and down. "Have you no shame!"
Zelas opened one eye at the girl, grinning cheekily, "No, not really, but it is a delicious emotion. Just a tad spicy."
"Hmph!" Turning away, Filia scouted the room for something more interesting than her less than appropriate mentor. However, a quick glance revealed a significant lack of family photos or sentimental knick-knacks, unlike the office she had viewed upon her first meeting with Zelas Metallium. Wandering, Filia grazed her fingers against the few Victorian decorations, ignoring the beady eyes boring into her back. Suddenly, Filia's fingers halted over a seemingly simple ceramic vase, her eyes peering at the pretty decoration.
It seemed simple enough–its design neat and fluid, the glass smooth and pleasant under her fingertips. She ran a finger along its length, eyes squinting as she lifted the delicate vase, bringing it closer to her curious eyes. The vase was made from the most brilliant violet glass that shimmered in the faint light, but if she peered close enough she could see a very fine layer of gold... Almost invisible to the naked eye, except when held in just the right light... Then, the vase was a chaotic swirl of violets and golds, twisting and twirling around each other...
"Like it?" Filia jerked, eyes wide as Zelas stepped beside her, the girl having not even heard the other woman leave the couch.
Not finding anything in the woman's statement unkind or baiting, Filia merely nodded, strangely sad to hand the decoration over. "It's very beautiful. Was it a gift?"
Zelas smiled, cool and mocking, "Something like that." Her eyes were beady and calculating as she peered at Filia over the violet glass, "It's my son's... Some fond keepsake of his, but it does look so nice in here, don't you think?" Filia wasn't sure what reaction Zelas was looking for, but whatever she saw seemed to please the older woman. "It's very old. The crafter was an expert at her art, but there are so very few pieces remaining in the world."
A cold, icy finger seemed to trail up Filia's spine, "Oh..." She could feel a dark cloud hovering over her as she watched Zelas's red lips widen, that tricky little grin reminding her of dark, dangerous paths—Filia had the overwhelming feeling she had managed to walk into a trap and she had no idea how to escape...
"Yes. See?" She turned the vase over, revealing its bottom to the girl, "Her initials are still visible."
F. C.
The air was heavy and thick—unable to fit into her mouth, her lungs pleading for oxygen, but finding no relief... Filia clawed at the sudden darkness overwhelming her, mouth opening in a soundless scream—it surrounded her and cloaked her and it would take her–she knew that with sudden clarity. This dark, evil cloud of 'knowing' would sink into her pores, tear at her soul, and leave nothing behind. She would lose herself. She was losing herself. She was falling and falling and falling—
And then she wasn't.
Filia gasped, eyes shooting open, as she found her sudden descent halted—staring wide-eyed into Zelas's amused features. "Feeling a bit faint, dear?" Zelas seemed to peer over Filia's head, smiling darkly, "How terribly fortunate you came by."
Filia tensed, eyes glancing down at the strange gloved hands holding her close, realizing she was slumped against someone warm and solid... "Uh..." Legs still shaky, Filia could only twist in her rescuer's arms, a strand of violet hair grazing against her cheek, as she peered into her rescuer's face...
Long, silky strands of violet hair... Pale handsome features... And lips quirked forever in a maddening, mysterious smile...
Xelloss Metallium stared into her white face, watching as the blood drained from Filia's features, his voice cheerful, "Very fortunate, indeed, mother." He grinned, opening his amethyst colored eyes, "Very fortunate, indeed."
Ta-da! And onto the reviewer commenty thing
Mistress DragonFlame— Sadly, Filia's reaction to Xelloss will have to wait, but at least he's finally shown up! And yes, a writer's love is a fickle thing—I just can't seem to stop messing with poor Fi-chan's head :P But, alas, that's the curse a beloved character must face and I can only hope this chapter was worth waiting for!
Soobin----Blush Thank ya ever so much! Your comments really mean a lot to me, especially your reassurances about Lina–hopefully, I did her justice in this chapter, too crosses fingers And I gotta let Filia get a little happiness in–over time, she'll steadily become more and more like her old self. And the Xelloss-bashing was one of my favorite scenes to write, especially Amelia's part in it, so I'm glad ya liked!
Lady Dark Angel—Look! Xelloss! Well, kinda...but at least he's finally shown up and will now be a front row player in the fic And I always felt sorry for Sylphiel during the shows, she's a really strong character, but tends to get pushed aside by the overwhelming presence of ppl like Lina, but you're right–her and Gourry not nearly as compatible as Lina/Gourry. And Xelloss is ALWAYS trouble
encyser—Thank you very much for commenting and I'm glad you like the fic so far However, ya brought up an issue that I guess needs addressing—The occasional references to the gang as "former priestess" or "chimera" are entirely intentional. While, Filia may not completely recognize the others and vice versa, the others do remember much of their "past lives"—they just don't remember everything and, as such, are in a lot of ways still the roles of their previous days. I'd go on, but I'm afraid I might start giving away major plot points—I can only say that the reference to who they once were is necessary, in my opinion, and yes, eventually Filia will be referred to as "the dragon"–but I assure you, its all part of the story. I can only hope ya understand and continue reading, but I'm afraid its not something I can change. Thank you again for the comment!