Desire & Deceit

Chapter 3:Draco's Eyes

Draco had just become aware that his hands were gently gripping someone's shoulders, he had been too captivated by warm brown eyes to notice what his hands were doing. He stood in utter confusion until a menacingly loud voice woke him from his stupor.

" I said take your hands off of her!"

It was then that Draco realized that the someone he had been holding was none other than Hermione Granger. He quickly relinquished his grip on her and shoved her away.

" As if I wanted my hands on her! She's the one who came running into my arms. Now look at me! I'm filthy and I reek! Thank you very much you dirty little mudblood! Now if you'd excuse I have to go home, shower, and burn these robes!"

Draco shot past Ron and Harry towards the door feeling very….. well he couldn't figure out exactly what he felt. When he reached the exit he turned around saw Hermione sobbing into Ron's shoulder. He ran out the door and bolted to Flourish and Blotts where his mother was picking up his new schoolbooks.

" Mother could we please leave now?"

" What's the matter? You don't look well, is everything alright?"

" Yes… I mean no……I mea…….. I'm not feeling well. Could we go back so I could lie down for a bit?"

" Just let me pay for these, then we may leave."

" Thank you, Mother."

He went outside and sat down, his back resting against the wall of the store. He hadn't wanted to sound so mean back at the joke shop, he had just been trying to save face. He didn't mean to make her cry. He had never meant to make Hermione cry. But why was that? Draco had never understood his constant need to impress her. Not to belittle her accomplishments but to impress her with his. He had, ever since he had first met Granger, felt beneath her. Why did he feel the way he felt about her? What exactly was it that he felt about her? He had always liked her and wanted to know her, but she hated him. Hated him because of his father, they way he acted, and they way he treated Potter and Weasley. The only reason he treated them badly was because they were always with Hermione, and it made him insanely jealous. He knew deep inside that he had always loved her and always would. But it was pointless to care because she would never feel the same. He would have to go on pretending, dreaming, and deceiving everybody, including himself.

Back at the Manor, Draco stood staring at the mirror on his bedroom wall. He was disgusted with what he saw staring back at him. A cruel, womanizing, sadist with no soul. It used everyone and everything in its wake to attain nothing in particular, except a self-assuring sense of power. Draco Malfoy saw himself.

He sighed and walked over to his bed. He let himself fall backwards. That wasn't him, not really. That's the face he showed to everybody else but himself. How could he allow himself to become this monster? He was becoming everything he hated. He wasn't like his friends who were proud of the fact that their parents were death eaters. He wasn't like his parents who worshipped the ground the Dark Lord walked over. He didn't believe in the whole pureblood mania or the stupid shit that He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named preached. He knew it was wrong with every fiber of his being, yet was still being pushed into it. After the end of his seventh year of Hogwarts, his family and friends and the Dark Lord himself would expect him to become a death eater. It was becoming more than he could bear and he was beginning to rather face the wrath of everyone he knew than carry on the charade any longer. But he couldn't let the people that he loved die because of him. He had no choice but to continue living this way. He only wished that she could see that. See things the way he saw them, through his eyes.

-

Salty tears were stinging her eyes and burning her cheeks. Her face was buried deep into her boyfriend's shoulder. She could feel his arms holding her tightly, but wasn't comforted in the least. No one could hurt her like Malfoy could and whenever he did; she could feel his words cutting into her like a sharp blade. And the wounds inflicted by him never fully healed. Two strong hands gripped her shoulders and a soft voice whispered

" Come on Hermione, let's get you upstairs."

Hermione turned to face the speaker and saw two identical, befreckled redheads towering over her. She nodded gratefully and followed George upstairs to the apartment above the store. Fred stayed behind long enough to find Ginny and inform the staff that if Draco Malfoy ever tried to enter the store again, to use whatever hexes, curses, and/or jinxes they could think up off the tops of their heads. Ginny smiled to herself, thinking that her brothers had to be the most caring people she would ever meet, no matter how they acted otherwise. She followed Fred upstairs. She found George patting Hermione's shoulder while waving his wand around, trying to clear of the cluttered kitchen surfaces. George exchanged a significant glance with Fred before they left together. Ginny walked over to the table in the center of the room and took a seat across from her best friend.

" So, what's really bothering you? And don't give me any of that crap about it being just what Draco said. I know there something else and the twins see it to. So come on, fess up?"

" It's nothing. Just leave it alone, ok."

" No the bloody hell it's not ok. So tell me what the fuck is going on!"

" Have you ever felt like you're living a lie and that the person who is supposed to care about most is just using you?"

" This is about Ron isn't it? You guys finally did it didn't you?"

Hermione nodded slowly and sighed. If Harry and Ginny could see that she and Ron had fucked, how many other people could?

" How? When? Why? Wait I sec, I honestly don't want the how. But the when and why are still a need to know."

" This morning and I don't really know why. I think I was just tired of fighting it. I just let it happen, but I so did not want it to."

" Wait a minute, this morning! Is that what you were doing when you disappeared before breakfast? Ewww!"

" Shut up! But it's not just the whole thing with Ron. It's the guy from my dreams. Well I figured out who he is."

" What? Who is he?" Ginny gasped as she saw the look on Hermione's face, " Hermione no. Are you serious? Malfoy? How could you tell?"

Hermione looked at Ginny, unshed tears make her brown eyes glisten.

" Draco's eyes."