Notes: Howdy... I agreed with Neroli's review, so here's the revamped version. Hope it's better!
.............................
His head hurt. His back hurt. His stomach hurt. Even his legs were numb. He was genuinely uncomfortable.
Jayne slowly opened his eyes, blinking back at the harsh lights shining down on him. He peered through the halos that seemed to float through his eyes. Where was River? He looked around, and exhaled with relief: he recognized the view. He was lying on his back on the infirmary bed, safe.
"Hey, Jayne's awake!" he heard Kaylee chirp. Her smiling face appeared in his line of sight and she patted his cheek. "Oh, I'm so glad you're feeling better!"
"Who says I'm feeling better?" he grouched in crackly voice.
Kaylee ignored the grumping.
"Simon fixed you right up. Isn't he a good doc?" There was a sweet note of adoration in her voice. Jayne tried to ignore her. He wanted to sleep.
But then Shepherd Book leaned his face in, and pointed down towards Jayne's feet.
"We couldn't get her off. Seems she's quite infatuated with her rescuer!" Book chuckled pleasantly.
Jayne gingerly lifted his head to look where Book was pointing. River was seated cross-legged across his thighs. No wonder he couldn't feel his legs.
She looked like a queen on her throne; her deep purple dress billowed around her, draping off Jayne's legs. He stared at her. Her eyes were closed but her lips were moving. Was she praying? She looked so out of place in the sterile white infirmary. Her dark curls stood out against the bright walls and her soft, flowing dress contrasted the sharp, straight lines of the room.
Her lips pursed and her eyes cautiously opened. When she saw that Jayne was looking at her, she clasped her hands together and laughed: a joyful, bubbling noise. Jayne couldn't help but smile back. Silly girl.
River's obvious attachment to Jayne deeply aggravated Simon, and he had been trying to shoo her away for the past eight hours; he'd had to operate for three hours while River watched agitatedly, correcting his surgical technique.
"There, mei-mei. See?" Simon cajoled. "He's all better now." He moved towards her, struggling to entice her to come down. "Why don't you go to your room? Jayne needs to rest."
River ignored Simon's pleading and continued to admire Jayne's breathing. Simon sighed like the devoted but overtaxed brother he was.
"Kaylee, can you take her, please?"
"Sure! Come on, River. Let's go find something fun to do."
Kaylee took hold of River's hand, trying to coax her down off the table. River, feeling safe in the knowledge that Jayne was finally all right, climbed down to link arms with her friend. Before she left with Kaylee, she ran back to Jayne, and whispered in his ear.
"Good morning, zhang-fu."
Then she left happily with Kaylee, whispering to her conspiratorially, "Did you know I'm alive?"
Zhang-fu? Jayne wondered. Why was she still calling him husband? He thought she'd be over that now that they were back on the ship. Heh, him, a husband! Silliest thing he ever heard. Why, almost makes him sound respectable. Hmm. Still, wasn't the worst thing that could happen. She was an awfully attractive wife. With that hair and those legs... He wondered if she knew how to cook. Nah, didn't matter. That girl threw a knife from 30 feet away and hit her mark. That's all he needed in a wife. Wait... he had to remind himself that she wasn't really his. It was just a game she was playing. He sighed.
Once the infirmary had cleared of Jayne's well-wishers, Simon approached Jayne.
"Seems my sister," he started, pausing to emphasize their relationship, "has grown quite fond of you. Exactly what happened out there?"
Jayne immediately grew defensive.
"Hey, I got stabbed on account of your sister! More than once! Those creeps were trying to shoot us." Jayne paused, trying to remember exactly what happened. "Hey, she didn't get hurt did she? She's all right?"
Simon begrudgingly sighed, rubbing his forehead, "She's fine. Not a mark on her. Except the scratch on her shoulder. I put a weave on it just to be sure."
He looked at Jayne, forcing down his disparagement. "I'm sorry. You did take good care of her. Thank you."
Jayne, reassured that he had done his job well and even earned some points with the doc, relaxed and got ready for sleep again.
"No prob, doc. Just fix me up pretty like."
"There's no helping that, I'm afraid," Simon muttered, half-way joking.
...........................
It was dark all over the ship. Only the light from the stars formed silvery shadows. Everyone had gone to sleep hours ago. Everything was quite and peaceful.
Except in River's head.
She was losing something. She kept chasing it. But it slipped through her fingers. Like butterflies and water. Then, she was left with just empty nothingness.
She woke up screaming. Screams of terror and loss.
Simon ran into her room, frightened at her wide eyes and her incoherent screams. Rushing over, he grabbed her shoulders, pulling her to him. He tried to comfort her, and, for a moment, she embraced him. Then roughly shoved him away, looking at him in disappointment. She stopped screaming, but was still wild, half stuck in her dreams. She flung her arms out to beat back her demons then reached out for an invisible comfort that she couldn't find.
Shepherd Book, having heard her screams, came in to offer his assistance to Simon. He helped Simon pin River down on the floor as she struggled, while Simon rummaged around in his med kit for a smoother.
Seeing that he was going to drug her, and not wanting to be forced to her dreams again, River started screaming for the only one who'd made her forget her nightmares before.
"Jayne! Jayne!"
........
Jayne awoke abruptly from his sleep in the infirmary. His heart was racing. She was screaming for him.
"Gorram girl," he muttered. He painfully swung his feet off the bed, and lumbered carefully down the hallway, bracing his hands on the walls as he walked.
When he slid open the door to her room, Simon and Book were holding her down, trying to help her. River stared at Jayne with panic in her eyes.
"What the hell are you doing to her?!" Jayne bellowed at the two as he stepped into the room with clenched fists.
Simon dropped his sister's arm in surprise and stared at his patient.
Once free of Simon's grip, River ran to Jayne, grabbed the edge of his shirt and pushed it up his chest.
She immediately calmed down, and stared silently at the bandages wrapped around his waist.
Book and Simon watched as she ran her fingers along the white gauze, pausing at the small red stains that had soaked through. Jayne stood motionless, his breath quickening as he watched her long fingers dance across his stomach.
River turned her red-rimmed eyes up to Jayne's, and asked in a hopeful voice,
"You bled?"
He snorted. "Yeah, a lot."
She looked at him pointedly, trying to convey every ounce of importance in her stare.
"I thought... it was all a dream."
He caught the heated look in her eye, the way her breath hitched in her chest when she said those words.
His tongue wet his lips as he stared down at her, remembering the way he had kissed her in the cave, the feel of her skin, the scent of her hair, the length of her legs around him.
"Weren't no dream, River," he mumbled, shifting his weight uncomfortably.
"Weren't no dream," she repeated, half to herself, reassuringly.
Simon cleared his throat uneasily.
"You really shouldn't be up yet. Your cuts could open again."
"Well, it was your crazy sister woke me up. You need to take better care of her!"
Jayne and Simon stared each other down, Jayne furious that Simon had frightened River, and Simon furious that Jayne was questioning him.
Book took the silence as an opportune time to return to his own quarters.
"Good night, Shepherd!" River waved after him cheerfully. "Simon, go to bed," she added.
Simon glared at Jayne.
"Thank you for your help, now please leave my sister's room."
"She asked you to leave, not me," Jayne sniggered, crossing his arms against his chest.
"Now!"
"All right, all right."
Simon watched while Jayne left then tucked River back into bed.
"Are you going to be all right? Do you want to tell me about the dream you had?"
River shook her head, then patted Simon's hand.
"Shhh," she whispered. "They always return."
"Who will return?"
She smiled. "Good dreams!"
Simon smiled at her optimism and pecked her forehead.
"Good night, River."
"Don't let the Cimex lectularis bite!" she called after him.
He rolled his eyes and returned to his own room.
Thirty seconds later, Jayne stalked back into River's room, and crept towards her bed.
"Hey," he whispered as he poked her ribs. "You going to be all right?"
River rolled over. She'd been waiting for him to come back.
She stood up on her bed, almost reaching Jayne's height.
"Thank you," she murmured.
"For what?"
She placed her hands on his shoulders, then slid them behind his neck. Gently, she pulled his face towards hers and pressed her lips to his cheek. She drew back slightly, watching the light in Jayne's eyes, watching it grow and flame.
She kissed his other cheek, letting her lips linger a little longer. Slowly, she released him. His eyes were wide open, boring into hers.
She lifted her face again, coming whisper-close to his mouth.
Quietly, she quoted against his lips, "Be my love, and we will all the pleasures prove."
Rising on to her tiptoes, she pressed her lips to his, gently, in benediction.
Jayne felt his heart rush at the feel of her mouth again. She was in his blood now. Suddenly, his dream before he awoke in the infirmary rushed back to him. Stunned, he grabbed her face and pulled her from him.
"I was dreaming, but, you saved me, didn't you?"
She looked at him with sympathy.
"You were drowning. You needed me."
"How'd you see me? I mean, how'd you get in my dream?"
"You're my own, now," she explained, smoothing the creases in his forehead with her fingertips.
"What do you mean?"
"You called me wife. Three times. Makes it so." Her hands brushed down his bare arms, then retraced their path, sending tingles up his spine. He was forgetting how to concentrate.
"I don't get it."
She sighed, then explained in a matter-of-fact voice.
"The planet didn't have enough preachers. So to make a marriage legal, the husband needed to call the woman his wife three times. Then it is done."
"Wait, so, your mine? And you don't care?"
She smiled, "I care."
He almost threw his head back and laughed giddily, but remembered her brother was a few feet away. He was hers. He had his very own wife. This was way better than the rain stick. But how was the rest of the ship going to take it?
"Not well," she answered his unspoken question.
"So, you don't want to get... unmarried?" he asked hesitantly.
"No. This is good."
He didn't know how to answer, so instead he ran his fingers down her hair, tenderly smoothing her tangles.
"Can I kiss you again?" he muttered out, awkwardly.
She smiled brightly and turned her face up, waiting for him.
He ran his finger down her jaw, pausing at her chin. Such a perfect face. He cupped his hands around her, and brought his mouth down on hers.
He kissed her softly at first, trying to thank her with his lips, but then his passion took over, and he pulled her even closer, drinking from her warm mouth. Pressing his tongue past her lips, he stroked the roof of her mouth, making River moan and grab at his shoulders. He wanted her fiercely.
His hands traced down her sides, he ran his thumbs against the outer curve of her breasts. Her teeth scraped against his lips, his chin, his jaw. She wanted to taste every inch of his skin, to know his spirit was inside of her. She returned to his mouth, sucking his bottom lip, drawing the fullness past her teeth.
He grasped the hem of her nightgown, sliding his hands underneath, clutching at her bare legs. He ran his hands up the sides of her body, feeling the warmth of her skin, the roundness of her thighs, the curve of her hips, the indent of her waist, and the gentle slope of her breasts.
She gasped, shivering beneath his fingers, clawing at his chest, whimpering at his touch.
The sounds she made were turning him feral. He dropped his hands to her hips and yanked her body against his.
The sudden force against his midsection made him gasp in pain. River quickly pushed away from him, dropping her hands to her sides. She was flushed and frantic. She was breathing heavily through her parted lips, staring at Jayne, who, though cringing at his pain, was reaching out for her again. She grabbed his hand, bringing his knuckles to her lips, then she pointed at her door.
"You're hurt. Go to sleep," she ordered.
He winced, both from the sting of his wounds and from the loneliness in his empty arms.
He nodded resignedly, then turned and slowly left, limping back to the infirmary.
River remained standing on her bed for a few more minutes, turning pirouettes in her mind with the joy of living. She finally lay down again, and fell asleep with a smile on her face.
..........
River awoke an hour later. Jayne had returned, and was sitting in the chair by her head, his bare feet propped on her bed.
He looked down at her and shrugged.
"Couldn't sleep."
She smiled and reached out for his hand, and they both drifted off to sleep.
.............................
His head hurt. His back hurt. His stomach hurt. Even his legs were numb. He was genuinely uncomfortable.
Jayne slowly opened his eyes, blinking back at the harsh lights shining down on him. He peered through the halos that seemed to float through his eyes. Where was River? He looked around, and exhaled with relief: he recognized the view. He was lying on his back on the infirmary bed, safe.
"Hey, Jayne's awake!" he heard Kaylee chirp. Her smiling face appeared in his line of sight and she patted his cheek. "Oh, I'm so glad you're feeling better!"
"Who says I'm feeling better?" he grouched in crackly voice.
Kaylee ignored the grumping.
"Simon fixed you right up. Isn't he a good doc?" There was a sweet note of adoration in her voice. Jayne tried to ignore her. He wanted to sleep.
But then Shepherd Book leaned his face in, and pointed down towards Jayne's feet.
"We couldn't get her off. Seems she's quite infatuated with her rescuer!" Book chuckled pleasantly.
Jayne gingerly lifted his head to look where Book was pointing. River was seated cross-legged across his thighs. No wonder he couldn't feel his legs.
She looked like a queen on her throne; her deep purple dress billowed around her, draping off Jayne's legs. He stared at her. Her eyes were closed but her lips were moving. Was she praying? She looked so out of place in the sterile white infirmary. Her dark curls stood out against the bright walls and her soft, flowing dress contrasted the sharp, straight lines of the room.
Her lips pursed and her eyes cautiously opened. When she saw that Jayne was looking at her, she clasped her hands together and laughed: a joyful, bubbling noise. Jayne couldn't help but smile back. Silly girl.
River's obvious attachment to Jayne deeply aggravated Simon, and he had been trying to shoo her away for the past eight hours; he'd had to operate for three hours while River watched agitatedly, correcting his surgical technique.
"There, mei-mei. See?" Simon cajoled. "He's all better now." He moved towards her, struggling to entice her to come down. "Why don't you go to your room? Jayne needs to rest."
River ignored Simon's pleading and continued to admire Jayne's breathing. Simon sighed like the devoted but overtaxed brother he was.
"Kaylee, can you take her, please?"
"Sure! Come on, River. Let's go find something fun to do."
Kaylee took hold of River's hand, trying to coax her down off the table. River, feeling safe in the knowledge that Jayne was finally all right, climbed down to link arms with her friend. Before she left with Kaylee, she ran back to Jayne, and whispered in his ear.
"Good morning, zhang-fu."
Then she left happily with Kaylee, whispering to her conspiratorially, "Did you know I'm alive?"
Zhang-fu? Jayne wondered. Why was she still calling him husband? He thought she'd be over that now that they were back on the ship. Heh, him, a husband! Silliest thing he ever heard. Why, almost makes him sound respectable. Hmm. Still, wasn't the worst thing that could happen. She was an awfully attractive wife. With that hair and those legs... He wondered if she knew how to cook. Nah, didn't matter. That girl threw a knife from 30 feet away and hit her mark. That's all he needed in a wife. Wait... he had to remind himself that she wasn't really his. It was just a game she was playing. He sighed.
Once the infirmary had cleared of Jayne's well-wishers, Simon approached Jayne.
"Seems my sister," he started, pausing to emphasize their relationship, "has grown quite fond of you. Exactly what happened out there?"
Jayne immediately grew defensive.
"Hey, I got stabbed on account of your sister! More than once! Those creeps were trying to shoot us." Jayne paused, trying to remember exactly what happened. "Hey, she didn't get hurt did she? She's all right?"
Simon begrudgingly sighed, rubbing his forehead, "She's fine. Not a mark on her. Except the scratch on her shoulder. I put a weave on it just to be sure."
He looked at Jayne, forcing down his disparagement. "I'm sorry. You did take good care of her. Thank you."
Jayne, reassured that he had done his job well and even earned some points with the doc, relaxed and got ready for sleep again.
"No prob, doc. Just fix me up pretty like."
"There's no helping that, I'm afraid," Simon muttered, half-way joking.
...........................
It was dark all over the ship. Only the light from the stars formed silvery shadows. Everyone had gone to sleep hours ago. Everything was quite and peaceful.
Except in River's head.
She was losing something. She kept chasing it. But it slipped through her fingers. Like butterflies and water. Then, she was left with just empty nothingness.
She woke up screaming. Screams of terror and loss.
Simon ran into her room, frightened at her wide eyes and her incoherent screams. Rushing over, he grabbed her shoulders, pulling her to him. He tried to comfort her, and, for a moment, she embraced him. Then roughly shoved him away, looking at him in disappointment. She stopped screaming, but was still wild, half stuck in her dreams. She flung her arms out to beat back her demons then reached out for an invisible comfort that she couldn't find.
Shepherd Book, having heard her screams, came in to offer his assistance to Simon. He helped Simon pin River down on the floor as she struggled, while Simon rummaged around in his med kit for a smoother.
Seeing that he was going to drug her, and not wanting to be forced to her dreams again, River started screaming for the only one who'd made her forget her nightmares before.
"Jayne! Jayne!"
........
Jayne awoke abruptly from his sleep in the infirmary. His heart was racing. She was screaming for him.
"Gorram girl," he muttered. He painfully swung his feet off the bed, and lumbered carefully down the hallway, bracing his hands on the walls as he walked.
When he slid open the door to her room, Simon and Book were holding her down, trying to help her. River stared at Jayne with panic in her eyes.
"What the hell are you doing to her?!" Jayne bellowed at the two as he stepped into the room with clenched fists.
Simon dropped his sister's arm in surprise and stared at his patient.
Once free of Simon's grip, River ran to Jayne, grabbed the edge of his shirt and pushed it up his chest.
She immediately calmed down, and stared silently at the bandages wrapped around his waist.
Book and Simon watched as she ran her fingers along the white gauze, pausing at the small red stains that had soaked through. Jayne stood motionless, his breath quickening as he watched her long fingers dance across his stomach.
River turned her red-rimmed eyes up to Jayne's, and asked in a hopeful voice,
"You bled?"
He snorted. "Yeah, a lot."
She looked at him pointedly, trying to convey every ounce of importance in her stare.
"I thought... it was all a dream."
He caught the heated look in her eye, the way her breath hitched in her chest when she said those words.
His tongue wet his lips as he stared down at her, remembering the way he had kissed her in the cave, the feel of her skin, the scent of her hair, the length of her legs around him.
"Weren't no dream, River," he mumbled, shifting his weight uncomfortably.
"Weren't no dream," she repeated, half to herself, reassuringly.
Simon cleared his throat uneasily.
"You really shouldn't be up yet. Your cuts could open again."
"Well, it was your crazy sister woke me up. You need to take better care of her!"
Jayne and Simon stared each other down, Jayne furious that Simon had frightened River, and Simon furious that Jayne was questioning him.
Book took the silence as an opportune time to return to his own quarters.
"Good night, Shepherd!" River waved after him cheerfully. "Simon, go to bed," she added.
Simon glared at Jayne.
"Thank you for your help, now please leave my sister's room."
"She asked you to leave, not me," Jayne sniggered, crossing his arms against his chest.
"Now!"
"All right, all right."
Simon watched while Jayne left then tucked River back into bed.
"Are you going to be all right? Do you want to tell me about the dream you had?"
River shook her head, then patted Simon's hand.
"Shhh," she whispered. "They always return."
"Who will return?"
She smiled. "Good dreams!"
Simon smiled at her optimism and pecked her forehead.
"Good night, River."
"Don't let the Cimex lectularis bite!" she called after him.
He rolled his eyes and returned to his own room.
Thirty seconds later, Jayne stalked back into River's room, and crept towards her bed.
"Hey," he whispered as he poked her ribs. "You going to be all right?"
River rolled over. She'd been waiting for him to come back.
She stood up on her bed, almost reaching Jayne's height.
"Thank you," she murmured.
"For what?"
She placed her hands on his shoulders, then slid them behind his neck. Gently, she pulled his face towards hers and pressed her lips to his cheek. She drew back slightly, watching the light in Jayne's eyes, watching it grow and flame.
She kissed his other cheek, letting her lips linger a little longer. Slowly, she released him. His eyes were wide open, boring into hers.
She lifted her face again, coming whisper-close to his mouth.
Quietly, she quoted against his lips, "Be my love, and we will all the pleasures prove."
Rising on to her tiptoes, she pressed her lips to his, gently, in benediction.
Jayne felt his heart rush at the feel of her mouth again. She was in his blood now. Suddenly, his dream before he awoke in the infirmary rushed back to him. Stunned, he grabbed her face and pulled her from him.
"I was dreaming, but, you saved me, didn't you?"
She looked at him with sympathy.
"You were drowning. You needed me."
"How'd you see me? I mean, how'd you get in my dream?"
"You're my own, now," she explained, smoothing the creases in his forehead with her fingertips.
"What do you mean?"
"You called me wife. Three times. Makes it so." Her hands brushed down his bare arms, then retraced their path, sending tingles up his spine. He was forgetting how to concentrate.
"I don't get it."
She sighed, then explained in a matter-of-fact voice.
"The planet didn't have enough preachers. So to make a marriage legal, the husband needed to call the woman his wife three times. Then it is done."
"Wait, so, your mine? And you don't care?"
She smiled, "I care."
He almost threw his head back and laughed giddily, but remembered her brother was a few feet away. He was hers. He had his very own wife. This was way better than the rain stick. But how was the rest of the ship going to take it?
"Not well," she answered his unspoken question.
"So, you don't want to get... unmarried?" he asked hesitantly.
"No. This is good."
He didn't know how to answer, so instead he ran his fingers down her hair, tenderly smoothing her tangles.
"Can I kiss you again?" he muttered out, awkwardly.
She smiled brightly and turned her face up, waiting for him.
He ran his finger down her jaw, pausing at her chin. Such a perfect face. He cupped his hands around her, and brought his mouth down on hers.
He kissed her softly at first, trying to thank her with his lips, but then his passion took over, and he pulled her even closer, drinking from her warm mouth. Pressing his tongue past her lips, he stroked the roof of her mouth, making River moan and grab at his shoulders. He wanted her fiercely.
His hands traced down her sides, he ran his thumbs against the outer curve of her breasts. Her teeth scraped against his lips, his chin, his jaw. She wanted to taste every inch of his skin, to know his spirit was inside of her. She returned to his mouth, sucking his bottom lip, drawing the fullness past her teeth.
He grasped the hem of her nightgown, sliding his hands underneath, clutching at her bare legs. He ran his hands up the sides of her body, feeling the warmth of her skin, the roundness of her thighs, the curve of her hips, the indent of her waist, and the gentle slope of her breasts.
She gasped, shivering beneath his fingers, clawing at his chest, whimpering at his touch.
The sounds she made were turning him feral. He dropped his hands to her hips and yanked her body against his.
The sudden force against his midsection made him gasp in pain. River quickly pushed away from him, dropping her hands to her sides. She was flushed and frantic. She was breathing heavily through her parted lips, staring at Jayne, who, though cringing at his pain, was reaching out for her again. She grabbed his hand, bringing his knuckles to her lips, then she pointed at her door.
"You're hurt. Go to sleep," she ordered.
He winced, both from the sting of his wounds and from the loneliness in his empty arms.
He nodded resignedly, then turned and slowly left, limping back to the infirmary.
River remained standing on her bed for a few more minutes, turning pirouettes in her mind with the joy of living. She finally lay down again, and fell asleep with a smile on her face.
..........
River awoke an hour later. Jayne had returned, and was sitting in the chair by her head, his bare feet propped on her bed.
He looked down at her and shrugged.
"Couldn't sleep."
She smiled and reached out for his hand, and they both drifted off to sleep.