When your boys have been snipped
Tight jeans should be skipped
Between the moaning and yelling
The doctors warned me 'bout swelling
"Wear a kilt" this one surgeon quipped!
She said they're flattering to guys
With my biceps and thighs
Best of all they're loose fitting
It's more comfortable sitting
Doesn't wearing a kilt sound quite wise?
Laugh Eames, while I ache
I made one small mistake
But who knew thongs were too Spartan
To be worn with a tartan?
I'm Italian! Can't you give me a break?