Disclaimer: I don't own Dawson's Creek, though I wish I could own Jack. Or Doug.

Chapter 6

Pacey leaned back in his chair, laughing so hard he couldn't breathe. He hadn't laughed in the week since Joey had told him what they believed was wrong with Doug. Leave it to Jen. She always could do the impossible.

"So I told him I'd love to come over for coffee sometime, and how nice it was of him to ask me over as a surprise to his WIFE, what with her having been in bed since she had the baby last week."

"You gonna tell her?" Jack asked from his seat beside Mark.

"Well, after I said that, he went absolutely white - he was smart enough to know I was threatening him, even if he wasn't smart enough to realize he'd met me five times. I'll give him a couple days, then drop by." She shrugged. "He's a prick anyway, and she knows it."

Alex nudged Pacey, a grin dancing on her lips. "Hear that, Pace? Don't hit on Jen - she'll tell me."

"Naw, she and I have this whole "we're old friends" thing. She's more loyal to me than to you."

"You wanna bet?" Jen gave him an evil smirk. "Never underestimate the power of female bonding, Pacey Witter. Right, Doug?"

"Huh? Oh, uh, yeah. Pace, women always come first with other women. I'm surprised you don't know that by now." He smiled, but everyone could tell it was forced.

Pacey sighed inwardly. The whole purpose of this little get together was to try to distract Doug, but the man absolutely refused to be distracted. Today was the day the doctor was supposed to be calling him with the biopsy results, and his mind was focused on that. Nothing any of them could do could wrest his focus away. Only Pacey's little boy, now taking his nap on Doug and Joey's bed, had come close to succeeding, shouting for Uncle Doug and Auntie Joey the second Alex got him in the door. He'd barely acknowledged his father's presence.

The shrill ring of the telephone dragged Pacey from his thoughts, and this time his sigh was audible. He knew who was going to be on the other end - they all did. It was nearly three, and the doctor had said she'd call before the office closed at four.

"Hello?" Joey answered the phone. Her expression grew even more somber as she nodded, as if the person on the other end of the phone could see her. "Yes, he's right here." She handed the phone off to Doug, and squeezed his hand supportively.

Pacey tightened his arms around Alex, and he saw Mark give Jack a gentle hug as Jack himself reached for Jen's hand. Pacey couldn't help but remember a similar scene last year, as they'd learned the results of Jack's first HIV test after finding out that Mark had tested positive. No one had been there for Mark when he'd found out what had happened. They were determined to be there for Jack.

Then, the news had been good. He wasn't sure that this would end so well.

Jack was sitting stiffly by the phone when it rang. "Hello...speaking."

Mark put an arm protectively around Jack's shoulders, as if his mere presence could fend off the pain that might be coming. Jen, sitting only a foot away and facing Jack, reached out and took one of his hands in both of hers, murmuring words of comfort. Her grandmother had been behind her, hands on both her shoulders, silently praying to a God that, out of all of them, only she truly believed in.

Pacey and Alex had been sitting side by side on the other side of the table, Matt on Pacey's lap. Amazingly, the toddler was silent, having somehow sensed that the adults in the room were very upset about something. Joey and Doug were standing off to the side with Andie, their faces pale but still hopeful.

Jack nodded slowly in response to whatever the person on the other end of the line was saying to him. "Yes, I understand. Thank you." He replaced the receiver slowly and turned to look up at his boyfriend, his expression carefully blank.

Then he brushed his lips against the other man's. "It was negative."

Pacey was brought back to the present by his brother's voice. "Yes, I understand. Thank you."

They were the same words Jack had said then but Pacey refused to get his hopes up that the outcome would be the same. From the look on Joey's face - she'd been listening - the news was bad. Doug's face was just as blank as Jack's had been when he'd hung up the phone a year ago.

Doug handed the cordless back to his wife and waited until she'd hung it up to speak. "She said that it's what she thought it was. She's going to make an appointment for us to go in and talk about what to do next. Someone will call tomorrow."

He stopped talking and stood abruptly, swaying slightly so that he had to grab Joey's shoulder to steady himself. "Excuse me," he mumbled, and walked quickly out of the dining room.

Pacey watched him go, then turned to look at Joey. In true Potter fashion, she was putting up a front. She turned to Mark. "Do you...do you think you could go and see if he's...see how he's doing?"

Mark looked surprised that Joey had asked him rather than Pacey, but Pacey wasn't surprised. Doug had been talking a lot about Mark lately, asking Joey, Pacey, and Jack how Mark had dealt with finding out that he was sick. Pacey could talk to him later - would talk to him later. Right now Doug needed someone to reassure him that he could go on with his life.

Mark found Doug in his and Joey's bedroom, holding a photograph taken only last month. It was of him and Joey, both smiling broadly. She held her hands over her stomach, and he had his arms around her, his chin resting on her shoulder.

"It's her you're worried about, isn't it?" Mark asked softly. "Her and the baby."

"Yeah, it is. If not for them, it would still be hard, but not like this. I don't want my child to grow up without a father."

"Or your wife to live without a husband."

Doug nodded and sat down on the edge of the bed, still holding the framed photo. "You wouldn't think of it, but I'm not THAT afraid of dying. I am a cop, after all. I know it's only Capeside, and not a lot happens here, but I've always been prepared for it, you know? I've always known that, possibly, I could die before I was ready to, and I kind of accepted it. I'm a little afraid, and I don't want to die, but that's not what I'm thinking about, right now anyway. Probably will be later on."

"Eventually, it'll start to get to you. But when I found out, my first concern was for Jack, especially because I knew he could get it because of me. He still is my first concern. I can tell you, though, that Joey isn't thinking about herself. She's thinking about the baby, of course, but she's thinking about you, too."

"She's lost so much. She doesn't deserve this."

"Neither do you."

Doug didn't seem interested in commenting on that statement. Instead he asked, "How's Pacey doing?"

"He's worried about Joey, about you and the baby. I don't think it's really occurred to him that this is going to affect him, too. It starts to hit him whenever you look like you're dizzy, or in pain, but as quickly as it passes for you, it passes for him, too."

"How do you deal with it?"

"It's like Jack told Joey - and I warn you, it sounds like something from a bad movie. We talked about it, came to terms with it then, and now we just try to make the best of the time we have."

"Yeah, that does sound like a movie. That what all your classes taught you?" Mark was a guidance counselor at the high school, and as a licensed psychologist he spent a lot of time volunteering at the local hospital. He tried not to treat his friends like patients, though.

"No, that's what I tell the kids I talk to though, and the people at the hospital. It's the truth. Don't dwell on it. Just, try to make the best of it. Focus on what you have, not what you might lose. That'll only drive you crazy."