Luke Skywalker came back to full wakefulness slowly, feeling as though he were fighting through layers of mud to get there. And darn it if he still didn't feel so cold that he wondered for a moment if he was still out in the blizzard. No, he knew he was back at the base. He had a very fuzzy memory of Han being with him, talking to him, trying to keep Luke warm. Gotta make sure I remember to thank that old pirate, he mused in his dreamlike state, if I can ever get my eyes open, that is.
"Hey, Farmboy, are you going to sleep for the rest of the week?"
If there was a voice that could persuade him to wake, Mara Jade's was certainly it. For her, he'd wake up from a coma. He finally managed to pry one eye open and he smiled as he saw her grinning face practically nose-to-nose with him. She moved back to sit on the edge of the bed.
"Well, at last he awakens! You know, I've seen people do some crazy things to avoid a work detail, but I think you top the list."
"Hi, Mara."
"And he speaks, too! Will wonders never cease?"
He smiled wider and then gave a little groan as the movement caused an uncomfortable stretching sensation on the side of his face. Tentatively, he reached his hand up and touched the nearly-healed scars.
Mara's face immediately went serious. "I'm sorry, I shouldn't make you laugh."
"No, it's all right. Doesn't hurt much, it's just a little sore."
They sat in a comfortable silence for a long moment and then Mara spoke in a soft, but urgent, tone. "Luke, don't you ever do that to me again. I was so sure Han was going to find a body--" She broke off as her voice wavered.
Luke reached out and took her hands in his. "I'm sorry, Mara. You know I would never want to cause you pain."
"Yeah, well…" She trailed off as their eyes locked onto one another and, nearly unconsciously, they leaned in closer. "I was just…" He had no idea what she was about to say as his gaze dropped to her mouth and the thought I'm going to kiss Mara! ran through his mind repeatedly. Mara's eyes started to flutter closed and Luke was already anticipating what it would feel like to press his lips against hers when Han, Chewbacca, and Wedge walked into the room talking loudly and shattering the spell.
"Kid, you're awake!" Han shouted.
"And none the worse for wear, obviously."
Wedge and Han couldn't help grinning at each other as the two people on the bed jerked apart guiltily. At Wedge's comment, both of them flushed a bright red. Mara jumped up off the bed, seemingly anxious to put some distance between her and Luke.
Luke frowned at Han, Wedge and the Wookiee. Boy, did those three really have a rotten sense of timing. He noted the teasing glint in Han's expression and glared a bit harder. Luke decided he owed Han a good punch in the nose after he thanked him for saving his life.
"Well, Skywalker, looks like you're already overrun with visitors. Do you mind one more?"
Luke looked at the newcomer in the doorway and smiled in surprise. "Hi, Arica. No, come on in, the more the merrier." He glanced at Mara and wondered why she was frowning all of a sudden.
There was a tense silence in the room and Luke looked around, a little confused. Mara was still frowning, Wedge and Han seemed barely able to contain their laughter for some reason, and Arica just smiled at him with a knowing gleam in her eye. Even Chewbacca looked as though he was about to chuckle. Was he missing something?
"Well, kid, I reckon that's one more you owe me. You keep this up and I'm gonna start sending you a bill." Han's comment broke the uncomfortable tension and everyone laughed.
"Yeah, yeah, whatever…" Luke said and cursed inwardly because he just knew he was blushing. He really hated to do that in front of Mara.
"I've, uh, got to go, Luke. Squad leader meeting and, uh, all that." Luke's expression fell and she hastily added, "I'll talk to command for you until you're back on your feet. Just don't take too long, okay?"
She hurried out the door before Luke had a chance to tell her he didn't care about missing the Squad leader's meeting, he just didn't want her to leave at this moment. He looked up as Wedge came up to the side of the bed.
"Hey, pal, they've asked me to be acting leader of the Rogues for the next couple of days while you're getting better. I don't wanna baby-sit those infants, so hurry up." He leaned down and shook Luke's hand. "And, Luke? Be more careful, all right?" Luke nodded sheepishly, touched at Wedge's concern.
After Wedge left, Chewbacca moved over to Luke and affectionately tousled his hair. [I agree with Wedge, cub. You must be more careful.]
"I will, I will, I promise." Luke said, beginning to get a little annoyed at being treated like a child.
"Well, c'mon, Chewie, those motivators on the Falcon aren't gonna fix themselves. We'll see ya around, kid," Han said as he gave Luke a little wave. Luke smiled at him gratefully. It was comforting how Han always seemed to understand the way Luke was feeling. He knew the smuggler had sensed Luke's irritation at being babied so he had not added any warnings of his own.
Luke looked up to realize he was suddenly alone with Arica Alie. That was an interesting situation. Luke truly did not understand the…he searched for the right word to call his feelings…the connection he felt for this strange young woman.
Luke Skywalker had fallen in love with Mara Jade the very moment he had laid eyes on her in that poor-quality hologram projected from R2 in his uncle's garage. Three long years later, he had yet to even kiss the jittery Commander Jade, much to his chagrin. She was as slippery as a bola beast when it came to the feelings they had for each other--and he knew she had feelings for him. Even as untrained in the Force as he was, he sensed that much when he was around her.
He had known all of this for a long time and that was why his fascination--for lack of a better word--for Arica confused him so much. He wasn't attracted to her sexually, or at least he didn't think he was, but there was something about her that seemed to…pull at him.
"You're awfully quiet," she commented softly.
"What? Oh, I was just, ah, thinking."
"Must have been pretty scary out there for a while, hmm?"
"Maybe a little." His male pride did not like admitting that at all, but he was too truthful not to.
"What were you thinking while you were out there? Before Solo found you?"
He looked at her with a frown. That was kind of a weird question. "Nothing much. Mostly stuff like 'Damn, I'm cold' when I was able to think coherently at all."
She laughed lightly at the statement and he decided he liked the way it sounded. Not a girlish giggle; it was more of a throaty chuckle and it resonated through his senses. Force, what is your obsession with this girl!? You are in love with Mara, you moron!
The two of them shared a long look and Luke had the feeling of something just beyond his reach, something he should know, but had somehow forgotten. When they realized they were staring at each other without saying anything, they both looked away, flushing in embarrassment. And Luke felt that she was just as aware of this thing between the two of them as he was, and she was just as baffled by it.
"Listen, Skywalker, I was wondering--"
Whatever she had been about to say was lost as an official voice suddenly blared from the PA. "Attention. Attention. Imperial forces have been detected in the Hoth system. All personnel are to begin evacuation procedures immediately. All fighter pilots report to your ships to await orders. This is not a drill. Repeat, this is not a drill."
"Sith!" Luke cursed, his dilemma about conflicting feelings for two women completely forgotten in the danger of this new development. He didn't waste a moment in throwing the covers back and swinging his legs around to get out of the bed. He remembered Arica then as he realized he was only wearing a medical-issued gown with nothing underneath it. "Ah, Arica, do you mind…?" Damn, he just knew he was blushing again.
She seemed to clench her jaw in frustration or annoyance--Luke couldn't tell which--before she said, "No, not at all. I guess we'll have to continue this conversation later."
"Um, yeah, later," Luke mumbled and for some reason, he felt uneasy about what that conversation might entail. She gave him a long, hard stare before she turned and silently left the room.
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A group of orange-clad fighter pilots stood in a tight cluster, listening intently to General Rieekan explain the tactics to be used in the evacuation process.
"The large transport ships will leave as soon as they're loaded. Only two fighter escorts per ship. The energy shield can only be opened for a split-second, so you'll have to stay very close to the transports."
Hobbie looked at him, the concern evident on his face. "Only two fighters against a Star Destroyer?"
"The ion cannon will fire several blasts, which should destroy any ships in your flight path. When you clear the energy field, proceed to the rendezvous point."
Mara Jade tried to damp down the nervousness she felt in the pit of her belly. Things had been grim in the past for the Alliance, but this was the first time the Imperials had found them so quickly. They'd barely finished establishing this base and now they were going to have to abandon it.
"Did I miss much?" a teasing voice whispered in her ear. She turned in shock to see Luke Skywalker grinning at her and he was dressed in his orange flight suit.
"What are you doing? You should still be in the medbay. You only just got out of the bacta tank two hours ago," she hissed at him in disbelief.
"I'm perfectly fine. I'm not going to miss--"
"Commander Skywalker. It's good to see you back on your feet." General Rieekan's voice interrupted the hushed conversation and Luke straightened as he turned to face his commanding officer.
"It's good to be back, sir. I couldn't let the other Rogues have all the fun without me."
"Only you would think this is going to be fun, Boss."
Luke scowled playfully at Wedge's comment and all the pilots shared a quick laugh. They knew the upcoming events would be difficult and that some of them might not make it to the rendezvous. But it was nice to break the tension for a moment by teasing Commander Skywalker.
General Rieekan smiled at the camaraderie the young men--and woman, he corrected himself, remembering Commander Jade--shared. He hated the thought that the Alliance would undoubtedly lose many of them before the day was out.
The General gave them their assignments and the group broke up. Some of the pilots headed for the snowspeeders to help defend the shield generators at Echo Station Five. The rest of them were given the responsibility of escorting the transports in their X- and Y-wing fighters.
There was a lot of good-natured ribbing and boasting among the different squadrons as they moved towards their respective stations. Luke's squad was nicknamed Rogue for the simple reason that he, Wedge, Hobbie, and Wes had decided that 'Red Squadron' was way too boring. Mara's group, not to be outdone by their friendly rivals, had taken the name Ghost Squadron.
Naturally, there was much competition between all of the fighter squads, but it was most intense with the Rogues and the Ghosts. There was constant dispute over which squad had the better pilots, which had faced the more dangerous battles, which had the most kills; the arguments were endless.
Luke listened to the usual debates before he made a detour on the way to his own snowspeeder. He had not had time to do this after the chilling announcement earlier and he wanted to be certain that it did not go undone.
He could hear Han and Chewie arguing as he approached the Millennium Falcon. He couldn't hold back a grin as he listened.
"NO! That one goes there and this one goes there! What are you thinking?! Don't you remember that we've got to clear out of here as quickly as possible?"
Luke laughed out loud as he heard Chewbacca give a ferocious roar that would have had anyone but the cocky smuggler trembling in fear.
"Don't you use that language with me!" He glanced down and glared at Luke when he heard the laughter. Han muttered something in Corellian that Luke was fairly sure was a slur against a certain farmboy's parentage before he greeted the younger man. "Hey, kid."
"Han." Luke paused for a moment, wanting to get his words just right. "Han, I never thanked you for--"
"Don't worry about it, kid. That's what friends do for each other," Han said, cutting Luke off before he embarrassed them both.
The two friends simply stared at one another for a long time, hoping that this would not be the last time they saw one another, before Luke nodded in acknowledgement. He called up to Chewie, only half-jokingly. "Hey, Chewie, you keep this guy out of trouble, all right?"
[You know that is impossible, cub, but I will try.]
"Hey!" Han protested this insult, as Luke laughed again. He looked at Han again before turning to leave.
"Luke!" Han called and Luke gazed back to see a sheepish grin on the pirate's face. "May the Force be with you."
The smile Luke gave back was broad and lit up his whole face. "You, too."
Luke still had a tiny smile on his face as he made his way to his snowspeeder. He was taken by surprise when something slammed into his arm. He looked up to see Mara glaring at him, her fist still raised and pointed in his direction.
"The only reason I didn't hit you in the face is I know you're still sore."
"Why did you hit me at all?" Luke whined, rubbing his now-sore arm.
"Because you should not be up there flying right now, you brainless nerf! You just got out of the bacta tank and--"
"Mara!" Luke threw his hands up, interrupting the tirade before she could really get started. "Mara, I'm okay, I truly am. If I wasn't, Two-OneBee wouldn't have released me and he did."
Mara huffed in response and finally lowered her arm, unclenching the fist as she did so. They stared at one another for a long moment and Luke knew he had to tell her what had been on his mind since he'd awakened.
"Mara, I need to tell this to someone and you're the only one I can think of who might understand." She arched a brow at him and he gathered his courage to continue. "I'm not going to be at the rendezvous with the others."
Mara's face paled so quickly, he thought she was going to pass out.
"You what? Luke, what are you saying, what are you thinking? Do you think some sort of sacrifice is necessary here? I know that you feel guilty about all the so-called innocents on the Death Star, but suicide is not--"
"Whoa, whoa, whoa! Suicide!? That's not what I meant at all!"
Mara's frown only increased, if that was possible. "Then what in the sith are you talking about?"
Luke took a deep breath and continued, "There is something that I have to do. Something that's not only important to me, but important to the Alliance, I think. You know that I told you I've heard Ben…well, talk to me since he died. When I was out there in the blizzard, I didn't just hear him, this time I actually saw him."
"Luke, you may have been imagining things. You were out there for quite a while and--" She broke off as he suddenly took hold of her shoulders and looked at her with the most intense expression on his face that she had ever seen.
"Please don't doubt me on this. I'm not sure I could stand that."
"Okay," she said, her voice small.
"Ben told me that I need to go to a place called Dagobah. There is a Jedi Master there named Yoda who will finish my training. I have to do this, Mara. But I just need to know that someone will know where I am and will be able to tell the Alliance that I will return."
"I thought all the Jedi were gone."
"So did I, but apparently this Yoda was able to escape Darth Vader." Just saying that name sent a chill through Luke's bones. Lord Darth Vader. The man who had betrayed and murdered not only Luke's father, but his mentor, Ben Kenobi, as well. The man who had hunted down and exterminated all the Jedi of the Old Republic. Yes, Luke had to do this. He needed to avenge his father's death, Ben's death, and all those Jedi that he'd never known, but should have.
"I don't know, Luke. I've never heard of Dagobah. Do you even know how to get there or how long it will take you? And how long do you expect to be gone? The Alliance can't afford to lose any pilots right now, especially not their best."
Luke grinned at her cockily. "Ah, so the commander of Ghost Squadron finally admits that the commander of the Rogues is the best. About time you faced the truth."
Mara's concerned look quickly turned into a glare at his words. "Do I need to hit you again?" she said, her voice menacingly low.
"No," he chuckled. "I'll be good, I promise." He realized he was still gripping her by the shoulders, but instead of releasing her, he slid his hands down her arms to take her hands in his. His expression grew serious once again.
"This is very important, Mara. It's what the Force is telling me to do. I know it sounds insane, but I have to do this. Please tell me you understand."
She held his gaze for a long moment before she answered him. "I do understand. I feel like… this is right. I don't know why, but I do," she whispered.
"Maybe the Force is speaking to you, too." Luke smiled softly at her.
"Just…make sure you do come back, okay? Because I'd--" She hesitated, not certain if she could really say what was in her heart or not. "I'd really miss you if anything happened," she said in a rush before she could lose her nerve.
"I'd really miss you, too," he said. He looked at her for just a moment longer and then threw caution to the wind and went with the impulse he'd had for nearly three years. He leaned forward and kissed her.
To anyone observing, it wasn't a spectacular kiss--just a little too long to be a peck between friends, though not quite long enough to get interesting--but to the two participants it was an eye-opening experience. It was what they both instantly knew they'd been heading towards from the moment they had met.
He pulled away from her and they both stepped back with a dazed look on their faces. Then Luke's face broke into a dazzling smile as he began to walk backwards towards his snowspeeder and his duty; he didn't want to take his eyes off her a second before he had to.
"We will see each other again, Mara Jade. I promise you that." He turned away finally and lightly jogged to the hangar and out of her sight.
She stood there for a bit longer and her fingers came up to gently touch her lips where Luke's mouth had been. "We had better, Skywalker," she murmured softly, before she broke out of her trance and hurried to her Y-wing.
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