A/N: Hmm, I think I'm losing some readers here. Oh, well, thanks to all those who are still with me on this monstrosity of a story! It's much appreciated.
In this chapter, I probably have some of the members of the High Council a little out-of-character, but I needed a 'bad guy' to kind of tweak Luke a little bit, so...
Again, text like ((this)) is Force-talk.
Thanks again to all those who are still with me. Your patience will be rewarded, I promise!
When Luke and Han came barreling onto the bridge of Home One, they were met with many disapproving looks. Even if they were prominent and decorated members of the Alliance, nonessential personnel generally did not come barging onto the bridge of the ship. Particularly in the middle of an emergency situation.
"Commander Skywalker. Solo. What is the meaning of this interruption?"
"That ship-" Luke began, but he was cut off by Vice Admiral Thaiman Kellar's irritated words.
"Do you mean the ship that just illegally blasted out of hangar 32B? The ship that probably carries an Imperial spy?"
Luke silently wished that Admiral Ackbar were present on the bridge at that moment. The Mon Calamarian had always seemed to have a bit of a soft spot for the young man who was trying to become a Jedi. His second-in-command, on the other hand, took a dim view of anyone not following the rules of military etiquette.
"Sir, if you'd just let me-"
"Commander Skywalker. I understand that you've just been released from the medbay after suffering through a harrowing ordeal. But that is no excuse for this blatant breach of protocol."
At that moment, the voice of the acting leader of Rogue Squadron - Wedge Antilles - came over the comm, ordering the Windrider to return to the hangar bay or be shot down. Even Luke could hear the reluctance in Wedge's voice, but Rogue Lead would do his duty and Luke knew that. He also knew that he could not allow it to happen.
Perhaps it was the Force speaking to him, or maybe he was just confused by the bond that existed between himself and Arica, but Luke could not bear the thought of her being killed. He didn't understand it, but he realized that he didn't have the time to ponder on it at the moment. Knowing that he wasn't going to get anywhere with Kellar, Luke went with the undoubtedly insane instinct to contact the other half of this dangerous equation.
Closing his eyes, Luke reached out towards Arica with the Force.
((Arica. Arica, don't do this.))
An incredible surge of anger, fear, and desperation washed over him and Luke barely managed to restrain his gasp.
((Get out of my head, Skywalker!)) Even through the Force, he could hear the snarl in her voice.
((We can talk about this-))
((There's nothing to talk about! If I see you again, I'm going to have to kill you.))
A shiver went through Luke at the realization that her words were no empty threat. Frowning, he tried again to reason with her.
((Arica, I know you're as confused as I am about this bond between us. Don't you want to find out what it is and why it's there? You can't do that if you try to run. And Vice Admiral Kellar is going to order you shot down if you don't return to the ship. I don't want that to happen.))
((Hah! As if you give a damn what happens to me, Skywalker. We're enemies, you and I. Kill or be killed, isn't that the way it goes?))
Luke was nearly overwhelmed at the bitterness flowing off her, but underneath that was a haunting sense of loss. Who was she? And what had caused her sink to the depths that she was now floundering in? The young Jedi felt a tremendous urge to reach out to her, to help her, and that still confused him. She had said they were enemies, but that didn't feel like the absolute truth. Or maybe it was the truth, but it was somehow wrong, twisted to a place where it wasn't supposed to be.
((I don't want to kill you, Arica.))
((Well, then. That will make it all the easier for me to kill you the next time we meet, Skywalker.))
With that chilling statement, she abruptly closed her mind to him. Luke was startled at the suddenness of it and winced at the jarring sensation it left behind.
"Hey, Kid, you all right?" Han asked and Luke looked up into his friend's worried face with a dazed expression.
"What?"
"You kinda zoned out there for a couple of minutes."
Luke glanced around the bridge and noticed a couple of the officers giving him odd looks, but when his gaze touched them, most of them turned quickly away.
"I was…talking to her," he murmured.
"What, to Arica?" Han asked in a sharp whisper.
Luke nodded. "She's angry, afraid…confused. And feeling abandoned for some reason."
"Lieutenant Lissiri, instruct Rogue Leader to take the shot when he has it," Kellar's voice cut through Luke's daze.
"NO!" The shout came from Luke and Han at the same time.
Luke wasn't altogether certain if he had put a little Force behind his cry or not. For whatever reason, the Lieutenant paused for just a fraction of a second, and that moment gave Arica the chance to disappear into hyperspace.
The tension on the bridge was so thick, it felt smothering for a long moment. A rebel Commander's eyes met the icy stare of the Vice Admiral. A Jedi Knight straightened and faced the glare with coolness and utter confidence.
"Vice Admiral Kellar, I apologize for interfering with your command. But the Force was speaking to me very strongly. Arica Alie is not a threat to the Alliance," Luke said quietly. No, not a threat to the Alliance, just to me, he thought and was surprised at how he managed to stay calm.
"I hope you are correct in that assessment, Commander. But be assured that this incident will be brought before the High Council," Kellar said in clipped tones.
Luke simply nodded before turning on his heel and striding off the bridge. Han followed him mutely and Luke could sense his uncertainty about what had just happened.
"Luke-" he began once they were at the turbolift that would take them back down to the hangar.
Luke held up one hand, forestalling any questions. "Not right now, Han, please. I'm tired and I need to see Mara before I have to go before the Council."
Han nodded and there was an awkward silence between them for a moment as they waited for the turbolift doors to open.
"Hey, I'm uh, sorry, y'know. About what I said earlier. I know you'd never hurt Mara," Han said.
"I'm sorry, too. I didn't mean to accuse you of anything about Arica." He wanted to leave it at that, but he could see the questions in Han's eyes.
With a sigh, he said, "No, I still don't understand what this link is between us. Maybe it's just something that happens between two Force-sensitive people, I don't know. But there's nothing…sexual about it, I promise you that."
Han grinned at the way Luke still hesitated and blushed when saying the word 'sexual'.
The lift doors opened and the two friends stepped inside. The smile on Han's face slowly vanished and Luke could sense the reluctant feelings of longing coming from him.
"Think we'll ever see her again?" he asked softly.
Luke looked down at his own feet, feeling so many things through the Force that it was almost impossible to sort them all out. "I'm sure of it," he whispered and wondered at the tinge of fear that went through him.
Luke sat absolutely straight in his chair, his hands folded neatly on the table in front of him. He hoped that he was at least projecting an air of calmness, because he certainly didn't feel it. Across from him was the High Council of the Alliance: Mon Mothma, Jan Dodonna, Carlist Rieekan, Crix Madine, and Admiral Ackbar. Of those five, Luke was certain that the Mon Calamarian and Rieekan were sympathetic to his cause. Dodonna and Madine were more inclined to distrust the Jedi ways. Mon Mothma, he was unsure of.
They had just finished debriefing him about the incidents that had occurred after the Battle of Hoth and at Bespin. Luke had not been as disappointed as he might have thought at the news that he was temporarily being replaced as the leader of Rogue Squadron. As much as he loved flying, he knew that being a pilot was no longer his destiny.
No, his fate lay with the Jedi…and his father, one way or the other. That secret remained his own. Luke was both unready and unwilling to share it with anyone yet, and it still pained him the way Arica had pulled the knowledge from him against his will.
Luke had been unable to read anything in the Council member's expressions and he didn't feel comfortable enough to try and use the Force to read their moods. They had listened to his account of the events at Bespin without comment, but he knew they weren't finished with him yet.
The episode the day before with Arica's ship was probably the next thing on their agenda and Luke was at a loss as to exactly what he would tell them. He only hoped he'd be able to find the right words when the time came. And he knew for certain they would not be happy upon hearing that he wanted to return to Dagobah and take Mara Jade with him. The looks of disbelief had been blatant on Madine's and Dodonna's faces as Luke had talked about Master Yoda and his Jedi training. He had prudently decided not to mention seeing Ben. That might have been a bit much for them to take. Telling them that he'd been 'led by the Force' was difficult enough.
"Commander Skywalker, would you please explain your actions on the bridge of Home One yesterday?" Mon Mothma asked in a calm tone.
"Arica Alie was not a threat to the Alliance."
"And you know this, how?" Dodonna asked.
"The Force-"
"Ah, of course! Your wonderful, mysterious Force. Tell me, Commander, is that going to be your answer for everything? And we're just supposed to accept this?" Madine said sarcastically.
Luke's clasped hands tightened, but otherwise, he gave no outward sign of his distress. "A Jedi's strength flows from the Force, General. It can tell us many things," he said flatly.
"Well, it certainly didn't tell you that Darth Vader was waiting for you at Bespin, did it?" Madine said.
"General Madine!" Mon Mothma said sharply. "Your rudeness is intolerable."
Luke's lips thinned and he fought down his anger. He closed his eyes briefly, seeking calmness and control from the center of his being. A tiny smile played over his mouth as he found it and he opened his eyes to face the Council once more.
"That's all right, ma'am. Actually, the Force did tell me that Vader was at Bespin."
"And you went there anyway?" Rieekan asked incredulously.
"Han, Mara, and Chewie were there. I had to go and help them if I could."
"And yet, they ended up having to rescue you," Madine sneered.
"Things didn't go as I'd hoped, that's true," Luke said, struggling to keep the calm he'd managed to find.
"Did you really think you could defeat Darth Vader, Commander? The man responsible for wiping out the Jedi during the purges?" Mon Mothma asked.
Luke didn't sense anything other than genuine curiosity in the question, so he answered it the best way he knew how.
"Part of me did, at first. The arrogance of youth, I suppose. I realized about ten minutes into it that I couldn't beat him, but at that point, it was too late." Luke tensed as he pondered how much more to say. "I grew up without my father and that's Vader's fault. I will face him again. And hopefully, the outcome will be very different," he said in a softly determined tone. Somehow, he didn't think it would be a very wise idea to tell them that he believed there was still some good in the Dark Lord.
He was gratified to see a grudging respect in the eyes of the Council, even Dodonna. Luke didn't think anything he did would ever impress Crix Madine. The General was also still intent on getting the answer to the question that Luke had managed to avoid.
"You haven't explained what happened on the bridge yet," he prompted.
"I can't explain it to your satisfaction, sir. But I know that Arica is not a threat to the Alliance," he repeated. "She's struggling with some things right now that have nothing to do with the rebellion."
"You know Ms. Alie that well, then?" Mon Mothma asked.
"There is a particular connection between us, yes. I really can't explain it any further than that," Luke said. Because I don't know anything further than that!
There was a long silence, during which Luke had the feeling that Mon Mothma was weighing everything in her mind: both Luke's service to the Alliance and the difficulties he'd caused them lately. Luke could only hope that the service outweighed the trouble.
"Commander Skywalker," she began. She paused with a smile. "Luke. I have followed your career with us over the past few years with great interest. You are an extraordinary young man. A young man whom I believe to be committed to the ideals of this Alliance. I'm not certain if you are as committed to the Alliance itself, however."
Taking a deep breath, Luke winced inwardly at the shrewd gaze she was giving him. His next words were very important, he knew that. They would affect not only his future with the Alliance, but his future as a Jedi, as well.
"Ma'am, with all due respect, I am still deeply committed to this Alliance. But I believe what has changed is the way in which I can best contribute to it. I love flying, I think that's obvious. And I'm incredibly proud of the time I've spent as Rogue Leader, but my destiny is to be a Jedi. My path lies with the Force and I must follow it. I believe that by doing so, I will still be helping the Alliance, just in a different way.
"That's why I think it would be best if you made Wedge Antilles Rogue Leader permanently and why I feel that I must resign my commission so that I can concentrate on my Jedi training."
He had shocked them, he could tell. Even Madine was looking at him with a slightly stunned face. I haven't even gotten to the hard part yet.
"There's more. I've discovered that Commander Jade is also Force-sensitive and I would like to take her with me when I go back to Dagobah. Together, the two of us want to begin the task of rebuilding the Jedi Knights."
If they had been shocked before, they were flabbergasted now. Madine found his voice first.
"What makes you think that rebuilding the Jedi is a noble goal, Skywalker?" he demanded.
Luke noticed that he'd left off the 'commander' and wondered if that was a telling sign. Madine continued in the same biting tone.
"The Jedi were nothing more than a bunch of meddling phonies with a few paltry magic tricks, and I say it was a good thing when their kind were eliminated from the galaxy!"
Luke stiffened, the anger flaring up sharply in him as Mon Mothma, Ackbar, and Rieekan gasped at Madine's blunt words. Even Dodonna winced at the harshness of the General's vitriol. Luke closed his eyes yet again, having to seek the calmness within the Force a little harder this time.
When he opened them again, the Council found themselves looking at someone who was a callow youth no longer. Luke's strength in the Force shone for all of them to see.
"I find it difficult to believe that you would condone the actions of Darth Vader, Madine. No matter what you thought of the Jedi, they did not deserve to be slaughtered like animals," Luke said coldly. He pushed aside the pain of knowing that it was his own father who was responsible for such a sickening thing, choosing to focus on the glimmer of goodness that he knew still existed within the dark armor.
That spark of goodness was what Luke was clinging to. It was the only thing remaining of the father he'd idealized as he was growing up. If it truly wasn't there…well, that didn't bear thinking about.
"That sort of attitude is exactly the reason we are fighting against this Empire," Ackbar said, speaking for the first time since this discussion had begun. "Commander Skywalker, my people have always respected the Jedi and I, for one, think you have a worthy cause in trying to bring them back. You have my full support."
"And mine as well," Rieekan added. "I hate to lose you as Rogue Leader, Luke. You're a hell of a pilot, but if being a Jedi is what you're meant to be, then I don't believe we should try to hold you back."
Luke nodded in acknowledgment of their support, which he deeply appreciated. Madine and Dodonna were stubbornly silent, but the opinion that truly mattered was Mon Mothma's. She was the leader of the Council and, although she would listen to their opinions, in a matter such as this the final decision was hers.
She looked at Luke intently for almost a full minute before she spoke in that quiet voice that many would mistake for weakness. Luke knew that the leader of the rebellion was anything but weak - she was one of the strongest people he'd ever met in his life.
"I remember the Jedi, Luke. They were always a force for good in this galaxy," she said softly with a quick glance at Madine. The general flushed a little at what he recognized as a silent rebuke. "Indeed, I even met your father once."
Luke's eyes widened as he stared at her in astonishment. That tiny voice in the back of his mind that seemed to rejoice in being completely irreverent whispered, Which version were you thinking of? The Jedi or the Sith?
"You did?" he asked and cringed at how adolescent he sounded, although Mon Mothma didn't seem to notice.
"Yes, it was before Palpatine declared himself Emperor. In fact, I don't believe Anakin Skywalker was even a Jedi Knight yet. He was still a padawan to General Kenobi. There was an assassination threat against a young senator from Naboo and he was assigned to guard her, if I recall correctly."
"Padawan?" Luke said in confusion.
"I believe that's what the Jedi called someone who was still in training to become a Knight. I'm not entirely certain. The Jedi were rather a secretive group about some things."
Her gaze sharpened on the young man sitting across the table from her and Luke had to resist the urge to squirm under that knowing stare.
"We are going to win this war, Luke. I believe that with every fiber of my being or I would not be doing this. Our cause is just and we will prevail. I would be honored if the Jedi Knights were there to help us as we reestablish the republic. As General Rieekan said, we hate to lose you as a pilot - and I hate to lose Commander Jade, as well - but if it is your destiny to be a Jedi, I will not be responsible for keeping you from fulfilling it."
"Your support means a lot to me, ma'am, and I promise that I won't let you down," Luke said, feeling a weight lift off his shoulders. He hesitated, wondering if he should ask the question that lingered on his tongue.
Mothma must have seen the indecision on his face because she looked at him kindly and asked, "Was there something else?"
"Do you know how my father died?" Luke asked quietly, feeling like the biggest hypocrite in the galaxy. Surely she could look at him and tell he was a liar. It felt as though it were written all over his face, but if he could find out even a shred of information about what had happened to his father, Luke was willing to risk being called out.
Mon Mothma's expression softened as she shook her head slowly. "No, I don't. I'm sorry, Luke, but it was a very confusing time. There were many battles during the Clone Wars and the Jedi were scattered widely. I'm sure that he died valiantly. The one time I met him, he seemed a fine young man," she said, obviously seeking to reassure him in some way.
A fine young man. What happened, Father? What happened to that 'fine young man'?
"Yes, that's what Ben said," Luke mumbled, realizing that the Alliance leader was watching him curiously.
Luke and Mara's meeting to share their plans with Han, Wedge and Chewbacca didn't go much better at first than the one with the High Council. It probably didn't help that they had decided to leave right away and talked to their friends even as the shuttle the Alliance had let them borrow was being prepped.
"Are you completely outta your mind, Kid?! If Vader was anxious to get his hands on you before, he's gonna be looking twice as hard now! And you wanna get Mara involved in that?" Han demanded.
"I'm already involved, in case you hadn't noticed, Han. And, oh yes, I have been fighting with the Rebellion even longer than you have, so I don't appreciate the 'protect the little woman' routine," Mara said hotly.
"Vader can't find us where we're going, Han," Luke reassured him while trying to hide his smile at Mara's setdown.
"How do you know that?" Wedge asked quietly.
Han didn't answer Luke because he and Mara were too busy glaring at one another. Chewbacca grumbled something about flashbacks of the trip to Bespin and both Mara and Han turned their glares on the Wookiee.
"Dagobah is under the protection of a Jedi Master. If Palpatine and Vader haven't been able to find it by now, I don't think they will anytime soon."
Han dragged his gaze back to his young friend and Luke smiled at him reassuringly. Luke knew that the Corellian was simply worried about his friends and Han had never been very good at expressing his fears.
Heaving a weary sigh, Solo looked at the united front that Mara and Luke presented and realized he'd never be able to change their minds about this, even if he did think it was insane.
"Just promise me you'll both be very careful and keep your guards up?"
There were hugs all around between the five of them, and laughter, and a few tears that were swiftly wiped away before they could be noticed. Luke slipped an arm around Mara's waist and the two of them started up the ramp of the Ship. Halfway up, he paused and turned to look at Han again.
"She's all right, you know."
Han flushed, something that caused great amusement for Wedge and Chewie, and said, "I didn't ask!"
Luke grinned back at him cheekily and for just a moment Han saw again the farmboy he'd picked up in Mos Eisley.
"You didn't have to."