The two friends, Kotetsu and Izumo were walking down the stairs at the Hokage's place, arms full of dusty old books.
"Damn that stupid Tsunade…she's so lazy!" Kotetzu scowled, shifting the heavy books in his arms, "All she ever does is drink sake, gamble and sleep."
Izumo looked at his big spiky haired friend worriedly.
"You shouldn't say that here…" Izumo warned, cocking his head slightly so his long luscious hair would get out of his eyes, "She might show up…"
"So! Who gives a shit about the old hag!" Kotetsu sneered imagining the big boobed woman.
"Kotetsu…" A strong female voice said from behind.
"Whoa!" Kotetsu screamed as he stumbled down the last couple of steps and landed with a thud at the bottom.
"Ha ha ha ha!" An annoyed Tsunade mocked the fallen young man, "Serves you right for talking about me that way!"
Tsunade walked close to Izumo, "that goes for you too," she whispered before pushing him towards Kotetsu, who had just managed to stand up amongst the mountain of books he'd dropped.
"What the!" was all Kotetsu could say before a poor Izumo, who'd flung all his books into the air, smacked into him, body on body, lips on lips.
"EW!" Kotetsu screamed, holding his slightly disorientated friend to the side.
"Ha ha ha ha!" Tsunade cackled, before disappearing up the stairs.
"Grr…" Kotetsu said, clenching a fist, "…damn old hag!"
"Forget it man…"Izumo mumbled, gathering the dusty books from the floor, "…lets just hurry and finish tidying up so we can leave earlier…"
But Kotetsu wasn't listening, he had his arms crossed and was cutely chewing on his lip, deep in thought.
Izumo had collected most of the heavy books up, only to have them smacked out of his hands again, by an excited Kotetsu.
"Heh heh…" He grinned, "I know how we can get the old hag back!"
Izumo leaned on the wall behind him, hands in his pockets, waiting for Kotetsu to announce his elaborate plan.
Kotetsu made a few hand seals, before closing his eyes and saying, "Henge!"
Izumo coughed and wafted away the smoke that Kotetsu had made and then stood shocked, as Tsunade lunged forwards and squealed, "Ooh Izumo…kiss me baby!"
Izumo went bright pink and closed his eyes.
"What? You really expecting a kiss?" Kotetsu laughed.
"That was you?" Izumo said in disbelief, before laughing adorably, "Damn it man, you totally freaked me out then!"
Kotetsu transformed back into Tsunade again and then said cheekily, "This is how were gonna get revenge man!"
"But…Kotetsu…" Izumo mumbled, staring at Kotetsu's large cleavage.
The fake Tsunade, leaned close to the embarrassed Izumo, "Hmm…just call me Ko-Tit-Su…"
The two ninjas laughed hysterically, and then both poked the Kotetsu's Tsunade boobs, before breaking out in more laughter.
Kotetsu and Izumo left the Hokage's place, as themselves, but once in an alleyway, Kotetsu transformed into Tsunade and Izumo transformed into Shizune.
"Why do I have to do this?" Izumo protested, feeling awkward looking like a woman.
"Duh! 'Cause if Tsunade is seen wandering around with you, it looks a bit suspicious," Kotetsu pointed out, "but if you're Shizune, then everything is cool with the world, yeah?"
"Fine, whatever…" Izumo mumbled, envying Kotetsu's bigger boobs.
The Tsunade and Shizune counterfeits walked around Konoha for a bit, not finding anyone interesting to trick, but then a large white haired man showed up and Kotetsu rubbed his hands together, "Heh, heh…our first victim…"
Jiraiya had a bottle of sake in his hand and was humming to himself cheerily, "Hello ladies!" he chirped.
Kotetsu grinned at Jiraiah, before striking a sexy feminine pose.
"Whoa…ha ha!" Jiraiya exclaimed before regaining his composure and calmly stating, "Old women are gross…"
A vein began furiously pulsating in the corner of Kotetsu's head, "Who are you calling old woman!"
Izumo grabbed Kotetsu by the shoulders, "Um…Tsunade, control yourself…"
Kotetsu smiled weakly at the confused Jiraiya, "Would you join us for lunch?"
"What? You're not gonna try hit me?" Jiraiya scratched his head before happily saying, "Yeah, but you're paying!"
Jiraiya, Kotetsu and Shizune went and sat in a posh restaurant, they'd all ordered their food and were waiting for it to arrive when Kotetsu pulled a pair of dice out and placed it before Jiraiya.
"Huh?" Jiraiya looked curiously at the strangely cute Tsunade, "What's that for?"
"I want to play some games, that's all…" Kotetsu said airily attempting to flick his hair in a girly fashion, but also whip lashing Izumo in the process.
"Fine, fine…" Jiraiya said confidently, since he knew Tsunade was a legendary sucker and was always losing, "Evens, please."
Kotetsu shook the dice in an empty bowl and then slammed it upside down on the wooden table. "Place your bet then." Kotetsu told the grinning old man before him.
Jiraiya chucked and entire pouch full of coins onto the table, "I just hope you'll have enough money left to treat me to dinner," he chuckled cockily.
Kotetsu removed the bowl to reveal the dice showing a six and a three, "Odds, you lose," Kotetsu said taking Jiraiya's pouch and handing it to a giggling Izumo.
"Whaaaaaaat?" Jiraiya screamed, "But you always lose!"
"Not this time," Kotetsu grinned shaking the dice again.
Jiraiya played on in complete and utter disbelief as the Tsunade before him won the entire contents of his wallet.
"Damn it," Jiraiya sulked, as he ate his food, "This has never happened before…I'll get some more money…and then ha ha! You are gonna give me back all my money and more!"
"We'll see…" smirked Kotetsu, as he paid for the bill and left the perplexed Jiraiya staring at his empty wallet.
As soon as they were out of the restaurant, Kotetsu and Izumo ran round the corner and into another alleyway.
"Whoa yeaaah!" Kotetsu whispered as he counted the money they'd won of the old geezer.
Izumo was smiling, but was still a little worried, "Do you think were gonna get done?"
"Nah…we're just putting our ninja skills into action, it's just a little fun…and besides look at the cash we just won!" Sniggered Kotetsu, shoving all the money into his pocket.
"Hmm…now who should we mess with?" Kotetsu wondered looking around, as they stepped back into the open.
Suddenly a very happy Kabuto was running towards them.
"What the!" Kotetsu screamed, as Kabuto thrust a bunch of roses in to his face.
"Tsunade-sama…" He said with big hearts in his eyes, "I've left Orochimaru…because I've realised that old snake men…don't turn me on as much as pretty old women.
Kotetsu glared at Kabuto for a moment and then smacked the roses into his face.
"What…you don't like them?" Kabuto mumbled sadly, as Izumo laughed quietly behind a fuming Kotetsu.
"Ew!" Kotetsu screamed, "You are such a freak! Go find someone your own age!"
Kabuto held the messed up the roses in his hand for a second before walking away muttering, "Orochimaru was right…you are a tight old cow…"
Kotetsu was about to go and kick Kabuto up the ass, but Izumo firmly held him back muttering, "Tsunade! Stop it!"
Kotetsu calmed down and scanned the area again.
"Heh, heh, look it's Ebisu…and he's just as much a pervert as Jiraiya!" Kotetsu said excitedly.
They followed a cheery Ebisu to the bookstand and watched as he started picking some very naughty books out.
Ebisu looked around cautiously to make sure no one was looking and then he grinned lewdly at the contents of the books.
"What're we gonna do with him?" Izumo asked curiously.
Kotetsu grinned mischievously, "Lets just make him squirm!"
The two fakes walked over to the shocked Ebisu who quickly threw the naughty books back onto the shelf, "Um…um…it's not what you think!" He mumbled turning pink.
"Oh…that's okay Ebisu-kun…" Kotetsu said in a very slow and seductive voice, "I like those books too…"
"Huh?" Ebisu stammered, backing into the bookshelf and really freaking out.
Kotetsu leaned very closely to Ebisu, so that Tsunade's cleavage was practically in his face and then whispered, "I want you Ebisu…"
A HUGE nose bleed erupted from Ebisu's nostrils and he ran away screaming, mega freaked out.
Kotetsu and Izumo laughed their heads off.
"Damn you were scary!" Izumo admitted as they walked back into Konoha's centre.
"Hey, look ain't that Genma?" Izumo said, nudging Kotetsu.
"Yeah…but how could we have fun with him? He's boring!" Kotetsu mumbled turning away.
The fake Tsunade and Shizune were standing outside the ramen stall, wondering who the hell their next victim should be, when suddenly 'boring' Genma grabbed Izumo's face.
"What the?" Izumo said pulling at the hands, which were coving his eyes.
"Guess who?" Genma giggled, before spinning the shocked Izumo round and kissing him lovingly.
"Oi! Gedoff!" Kotetsu screamed hauling a puzzled Genma off his friend mid-kiss.
"Huh? What's wrong Hokage-sama?" Genma asked, the toothpick in his mouth waving up and down.
"Duh! You just kissed him," Kotetsu snarled, glancing over at a dumbstruck Shizune, "I mean, her."
"And what's wrong with that? Shizune and I have been going out for quite a while now and I was just…"
"You just kissed her in public!" Kotetsu screamed, racking his brains for a suitable excuse to yell at the confused Genma, "…Public displays of affection are not suitable for this time of day! Um, children could be watching!"
Genma frowned and sucked on his toothpick for a moment, "I'm sorry Hokage-sama, it won't happen again."
Genma slapped the Shizune counterfeit playfully on the butt and winked, before disappearing over the rooftops.
"Man that was close…" Kotetsu sighed, patting Izumo on the back, "Izumo?"
The Izumo in the shape of Shizune was frozen; he didn't blink or even move.
"Hey Izumo!" Kotetsu whispered urgently, "Snap out of it okay? People are starting to stare."
Kotetsu snapped his fingers and Izumo snapped out of his daze,
"Damn it…that freak kissed me…" he mumbled angrily, "He put his gross wet lips in MY face!"
"Okay, calm down dude, it's over…" Kotetsu said patting the fuming Izumo gently, "…Genma's gone now."
Kakashi, had been wandering by, his face absorbed into his favourite 'Icha Icha Paradise' book, when he overheard Tsunade and Shizune's unusual conversation.
The use of the words "freak" and "dude" especially caught Kakashi's attention.
"Ohio Hokage-sama, Shizune." Kakashi said cheerily as he sat down on a stool at the ramen stall, nearly giving Kotetsu and Izumo a heart attack.
"Um…Ohio Kakashi sensei…" replied Kotetsu/Tsunade stiffly.
"Kakashi sensei…" mumbled Izumo/Shizune, a bit pink in the face.
"Care to join me in eating ramen?" Kakashi grinned, removing his mask to reveal his sharingan eye.
"Um…no were kinda…"
"Busted?" Kakashi asked, his sharingan eye having exposed the two ninja's for who they really were, "Kotetsu…Izumo…please join me"
Kotetsu and Izumo looked at each other worriedly, before sitting down on either side of the cheery Kakashi.
"You won't tell anyone will you?" Izumo asked, thinking that Tsunade would probably kill them if she found out.
"No…" Kakashi smiled and starting tucking in to his ramen.
"Oh, thank God…Kakashi sensei you're the greatest!" Kotetsu said patting Kakashi on the back, almost making him choke.
The ninja's transformed back into themselves and enjoyed their ramen, until Kakashi reached out and grabbed them both by the shoulders, "I won't tell on you if you do me a favour okay?"
"What kind of favour?" asked Izumo curiously, whilst Kotetsu just said, "Of course, you name it!"
"I want you both to transform into me…and run a few errands that's all…"
"You?"
"Errands?"
About half an hour later, a miserable Izumo disguised as Kakashi was being challenged by Gai sensei, to do about ten million stupid things.
Including playing rock, paper, scissors at which Izumo kept on losing and Gai flashed his blinding sparkly teeth many times after victory.
Eating as many rice buns as possible was another challenge, at which Izumo miserably failed, having thrown up rather violently after his thirtieth bun.
One challenge, which Izumo was great at though, was playing on a dance mat, the girls crowded round in Oohs and Aahs and Izumo was on a roll, whilst Gai sensei pretty much sucked.
Kotetsu however, was disguised as Kakashi and was with Tsunade-sama, ready to give her a foot massage, because Kakashi had miraculously lost a bet to her.
Kotetsu frowned at the sight of her wrinkly toes, sighed disapprovingly and then reached for some aromatherapy oils.
Kotetsu mumbled sadly, "How did I lose to you again?" as he massaged the oil between each toe.
Tsunade laughed slyly and settled her gaze on Kotetsu/Kakashi, "Remember…you bet I that I couldn't ever beat anyone at gambling…and then Jiraiya came along and told you that he'd been beaten by ME so…"
Kotetsu frowned deeply, it wasn't Tsunade that had beaten him, it was HE himself!
Kotetsu massaged her toes for a good long ten minutes and he swore to burn his hands off later, but inside his mind he was quickly plotting for another way to get revenge…