Progress: 14 of 14
General Notes: Took ages didn't I? Sorry. It's almost time for finals, so all our teachers are shoving our last tests for the year, and trying to hurry us along so that we've at least finished the course…sort of. Just had a chemistry test about something that we didn't really go over in all that much detail, although I suppose there really isn't much to say about transition metals. My prac didn't go so well though, instead of getting a paste, my partner and I ended up with what looked like wet, blue sand. It was rather nerve-wracking, considering that we had not done anything wrong. Oh well, let's just hope it goes right over before we get back to school on Monday.
Music: Noir OST I

Covetousness

Epilogue: Sakura

The sky was obscured by thick clouds, shielding the city below from what little sunlight winter had to offer. The wind was light but chilly, its gusts cutting like invisible blades through cotton shirts and jumpers. Despite the weather, Heero Yuy found himself standing before Quatre Winner's grave clad only in a loose, gray shirt with its first two buttons left open, and a pair of blue jeans. Duo would scold him later, he thought with a wry smile, would give him a powerful, long-winded speech mentioning incapacitation, shock and death, all linked back to the main contention that Heero was not wearing enough, although the link would definitely be obscure. Sighing, Heero bent down before Quatre's grave, and placed a bouquet of cherry blossoms (1) on the marble surface of Quatre's plaque. The white-pink flowers fluttered slightly as another gust of wind blew by, ripping off tender petals and scattering them across the blond man's grave. Heero's hair moved wildly with the wind, followed by his hand moving automatically to hold it from his eyes.

'It's been a while, hasn't it Quatre?' He asked softly. 'Two whole years since I last visited you. I do hope you're not angry at me, wherever you may be.'

Heero let his free hand drift towards the cool marble, ghosting over Quatre's name. He had avoided coming to Quatre's grave, ever since the blond man's burial two years ago. It was something that Heero was ashamed of, but he found himself unable to keep a clear mind every time he stood before the cold, black headstone. Quatre Winner, the person who had loved Heero enough to bring him and those around him so much pain. Even now, Heero could not completely forgive Quatre for what he had done, could not fully understand Quatre's state of mind. How could he have felt so strongly for Heero as to sacrifice everything, to lay out such a complicated scheme, just so that Heero could live a life as a human? Quatre might have felt like he had saved Heero, but Heero's own feelings were far from feeling saved. Often, Heero would have nightmares where he found himself chased by faceless people. When he finally awoke from those nightmares, his heart would still be beating rapidly and his breath short. Duo would stumble in from the next room then, crawling into his bed and holding him while whispering soothing words that Heero could never fully understand. Heero could not understand why Duo put up with him, but every time he asked, the braided man would simply smile and remind Heero that it was repayment for looking after him as a child. More often than not, Heero would find himself wishing that Duo was doing it for a purpose far different from repayment, although he would never tell the other man.

His life before death might have been hazy with lack of memories, but his life after was definitely full of memories. Often, Heero found himself wanting to forget things, namely the screams of the innocent people that had gotten in the way of his missions in the past, and had to be eliminated as a result of that. Duo revealed that he too, shared such nightmares, but he had learnt to tune those memories out. Such memories were simply thorns the mind made for itself, Duo had said, shackles that the mind bound itself with as a reminder of its own evil. But thorns could be removed, and shackles released. It would take time, but things would get better. Heero found that such words were true, and the amount of nightmares reduced as time passed by. They had not stopped, but there were steadily less and less of them, and Heero found himself feeling less guilty at being alive.

'I got myself a job as a database administrator.' Heero said proudly. 'Duo quit his old job, and he now works with me in the same building, but we're not on the same floor. Duo is a programmer now, he says it's more interesting than proofreading articles. We share an apartment about a block from Duo's old apartment, since the place was too small to fit both of us. Wufei visits us frequently. Sometimes Meilan comes as well. They got married eighteen months ago, and now have a little boy called Wufeng (2). The boy's inherited Wufei's bad temper, even though he's only a few months old. Wufei speaks of him like he does a god! Meilan's already thinking of sending him to law school, said he'd do well there after spending a life with his father and his constant justice rants. Duo suggested that he might be into cooking, considering the mess he made with dinner the last time he came around. Meilan found it funny, but Wufei got a little upset and ranted at Duo for a good quarter of an hour for misleading his son.

'You don't need to worry about Trowa, he gets many visitors. Mostly the people from the old bar who still can't believe that he's dead. A few of the musicians came over about a month ago and played him a concert on the go. You should have seen the crowd Quatre! It was truly amazing. It was on the news, "a tribute to a talented musician". Nobody knows how he really died, and it makes me feel a little guilty every time I hear them asking each other about how Trowa could just die from cancer like that when he was so obviously healthy. But I think they are better off with that story, that is why you made it up isn't it? Trowa doesn't need to taint his name…'

Heero looked up slowly to see the first snow of the season fall, drifting lazily down and landing gently on Quatre's grave before melting. More snow followed, covering the city slowly in a blanket of white. Heero smiled, his eyes sad. Quatre loved the snow, and despite all that he had done, his intentions had been pure, just like the snow. Heero rose slowly, eyes still fixed on his friend's grave. He might not have forgiven Quatre completely, but he was ready to put it behind him and move on, leaving the entire escapade as but another bad memory to add to his list of horrible experiences.

'Sakura sakura, noyama mo sato mo.' He sang softly, voice barely carrying over the wind. 'Miwatasu kagiri, kasumi ka kumo ka, asahi ni nio-u.'

More of the flower petals scattered as he heard Duo's voice in the distance, calling out to him and telling him to go back to the car. He asked Duo for another minute, and the braided man shouted something about snow and thin shirts not mixing while pointing an accusatory finger at Heero. Heero smiled as he turned back to Quatre's grave one last time.

'Izaya izaya mini yu kan.' (3)

Yes Quatre, lets see them together someday.

Fin.

Endnotes:

(1) Cherry blossoms, or Sakura, bloom for a very short amount of time, which is hence the reason why it so often associated with the swiftness life. I decided to use it, since visiting a grave meant visiting somebody whose swift life had ended.

(2) Wufeng literally means the dance of the wind, which I believe has some sort of association with martial arts. (I've got terrible Chinese). Since it is in pinyin, it could also be read as no wind, or, like Wufei's name, something to do with the number five. Ah well, take it whichever way you prefer…

(3) This is the second verse and final line from the first verse of the famous Japanese folk song Sakura. I'm not sure whether the song was supposed to be somewhat sad, but I always found the melody somewhat…depressing. No, not depressing exactly, just, sad-ish…Anyway, since Heero was bringing Quatre the cherry blossoms anyway, I decided that this song would be appropriate. Besides, being a folk song, it makes it somewhat in-character for Heero to sing it (okay, Heero in character just doesn't sing, but if he did, I think this song would suit the best). The translation goes:

Cherry Blossoms, Cherry Blossoms
As far as I can see across
the hills and valleys
like the mist or the clouds
The fragrance is carried in to
The morning sun

And the final line means: now, let us go to see them now.

It's finished! My first ever finished multipart story! I'm so proud of myself. I must say, I really enjoyed writing this, even though a large part of it was written while I was supposed to be in exam revision, still, the distraction was nice, even though slightly uncalled for. There were so many times where I found myself unable to stop writing this fic, and I think that's the only reason why I managed to finish it. To tell you guys the truth, the whole business with Quatre was something I thought up while being completely incapacitated with the flu. I had not originally planned to make Quatre bad, but I think the twist at the end made the story all the better. I really liked how this all turned out, even though I started the story with far different ideas. I suppose I should also apologize for the lack of proper 2x1x2. I intended to develop and further Duo and Heero's relationship, but somehow, this story ended before I had time for that…so sorry all, hope you still enjoyed it anyway.

I'd like to thank my friends Overlord and Leia for running through the plot with me and picking out the loopholes, and all my other friends who endured my ranting when writer's block hit. I would also like to thank Leia for her help in regards to all references made to alcohol, since I am a nonalcoholic myself, I know very little about it. I'd also like to thank Bob for all her attempts at helping, and our shared discussion when I was writing about Heero purchasing a gun. Like mentioned previously, guns are illegal in this country, and as interested as I am in them, I know next to nothing about them save that you pull the trigger and bullets fly out. I'd also like to thank Bob for all her various distractions (you guys don't even want to know some of the things she said to me while I was writing this), and her encouragement. I'd also like to thank Mi-chan for all her support and knowledge on classical music (you people should see her house! She has the coolest stereo system in the lounge, and more classical music CDs than I've seen anywhere else), and my friend Stephanie for appreciating my plot. Finally, I would like to thank all of you for reading this, and all my wonderful reviewers. You guys have really made this whole experience worthwhile, and I hope you all enjoyed it as much as I did.

Assassin