"Lane- say something" Rory asked her friend tentatively.
She had just explained what she and Tristan had done while skipping school, and after Lane drew in a quick breath, she had become silent.
"Umm- I'm sorry, I wasn't expecting that-" she began, losing her words in between her confusion and shock.
"I'm an idiot, I know I'm an idiot- why am I such an idiot?" Rory said, sadness swelling her tone.
"Your not an idiot Rory!" Lane said, comforting her friend down the other end of the phone line.
"Do you really regret it that much though?" Lane asked, cautiously.
Rory thought for a moment; did she really want to hear her own answer to Lane's question?
"Err, well the thing is-" Rory began, but stopped when she heard her mothers footsteps coming up the stairs, and her keys jingle in the key hole.
"I gotta go, I might come see you tomorrow" Rory said quickly.
"You better, see ya" Lane said, and hung up.
Rory put the phone back onto the table, and rose to her feet, ready to greet her mother.
Lorelai walked into the hallway, stopping and turning to face her daughter when she was her figure standing by the phone.
Rory had an expressionless face, not sure whether she should smile and try to smooth things over (if possible) or look distraught and guilty- she decided on something in between.
"I'm going up stairs to get changed" Lorelai said, and started walking up the stairs.
Rory walked into the kitchen, pouring some coffee into a mug, ready for her mother, and then sat down in one of the chairs, preparing herself for 'the talk'.
Lorelai stepped into the kitchen, the mug of coffee a pleasing sight.
She sat down opposite Rory, and looked at her daughter whose head was hanging low.
"I'm proud of you" Lorelai said, after a moment.
Rory looked up, shocked; was this how reprimanding speeches were supposed to start off?
Lorelai looked at her daughters face "You have always been the opposite of me; you are organized and self-sufficient, and I'm…" Lorelai tried to find the right words "…Well, I'm not" she said.
Rory now looked into her mother's eyes, ready to listen to whatever she had to say.
"I have this whole big thing I'm going to tell you" Lorelai began "and I have been planning exactly how I'm going to say it, the whole drive home; so I would greatly appreciate it if you just sat down and said nothing" Lorelai said to her still daughter.
"Maybe a nod here and there" Lorelai added.
"I can do that," Rory agreed.
Lorelai ascended from her seat, and began walking up and down the small kitchen, preparing herself for her speech, Rory's head moving in the same direction as her mother's body.
"Ok, I have always, and will always love you and be proud of you- nothing can change that. And I know that school and you're studies mean a lot to you- cause your that kind of kid! And don't get me wrong, because I love that about you-" Lorelai looked over at Rory, and Rory nodded three times, letting her mother know she was listening.
"But there have been times when I have wanted you to act on a whim, and go out and do something crazy- like other teenagers. Granted, I am glad you're not like other brain dead teenagers- I'm glad your more focussed and controlled-" Lorelai glanced at Rory, realizing that her nodding wasn't there, and that she'd lost her along the way.
"I mean, when I was your age I was always rebelling against my parents and breaking the rules at every chance I got! And while I'm glad you have tended to sway a different way when it comes to your personality, sometimes I worry that you not living your life to the fullest potential, missing out on some things- wild, crazy, exciting things" Lorelai stopped for a breath, glad to see Rory nodding.
Lorelai bent down, cupping Rory's hands in her own "Just, when, you do, on occasion; feel like acting on you're impulses, do you think you could tell me where those impulses of yours are taking you?" Lorelai asked her.
Rory lifted her head, smiling slightly "Yes" she said quietly.
"And as for this Dean and Tristan situation- well I cant tell you what to do with that, I know it's hard but kiddo-" Lorelai looked into her eyes "That's life, and you have to face you're fears, confront them, and that's the only way you'll conquer them". Lorelai saw that this was not what Rory wanted to hear.
"I can give you some guidance though- follow you're heart, cheesy and overrated as it does sound, I tend to believe in that quotable quote" Lorelai finally finished.
Rory smiled, a little wider this time, and flung her arms around Lorelai.
"Hey! I'm supposed to be punishing you- at least that's what the parenting hand book says to do in these sorts of situations" Lorelai joked, appreciating the warm hug.
"I wont tell if you don't" Rory smiled, pulling away from her mother.
Lorelai smiled "But if you don't mind me asking, what are you going to do about the Dean/Tristan situation?" she asked.
Rory sighed, she didn't want to tell her mother all the details about what she and Tristan had done today; she didn't want to tell her mother that she had sex.
"Your wonderful guidance in mind- I think I'll keep my impulses handy and wing it" Rory said, a little doubtful.
"So long as 'winging it' doesn't mean skipping school" Lorelai said, standing again.
"And it doesn't hurt to prepare yourself for the sort of confrontation your bound to have with both of them" Lorelai said thoughtfully.
Rory nodded, "I think I might head in for an early night" she said, rising from her chair.
"Oh no, wait" Lorelai ran over to her handbag that was sitting on the kitchen bench "I hired home alone- thought we might need some laughs" she said, pulling the video out to show Rory.
Rory smiled "Home alone? A little- tacky isn't it?" she said, the idea of staying up and watching the video becoming more and more tempting.
"Well, 'Home alone 2' was booked out" Lorelai said, gesturing towards the living room "'Home alone' it is then" Rory agreed, following her.
Lorelai pushed the door of Luke's Diner open, allowing Rory to step through, and then herself.
They sat down at their usual table, Rory looking out the window a little anxiously.
"Ah, the million dollar question is 'does she want to see him'?" Lorelai said, looking at her daughter's nervous expression.
Rory didn't take her eyes off the window "I don't think he wants to see me" she answered quietly.
Lorelai pushed her hands over towards Rory's, cupping them in her own. "In which case, he won't come near Luke's this early in the morning" she said kindly.
Rory smiled a little, and then a large mug of coffee was plunked in front of her and Lorelai.
"Oh! Luke, we have trained you well" Lorelai joked, looking up to meet his usual serious expression.
He mumbled a little and then turned back towards the counter.
Rory looked at her mother "Excuse me" she said, as she rose from her seat and walked towards Luke, taking a seat at the counter.
He glided past her, serving an old man a few seats down from her.
"Luke" she said tentatively.
Luke glanced up at her, and then down at his notepad while he wrote the mans order down.
"Quite a shiner you got there" he said bluntly.
Rory blushed, and Luke looked up at her, aware of her nervous/shyness.
"Rory, you're a god kid, and whatever happened that night- well it's none of my business. I'm your friend, and I helped you, I was glad to, so lets leave it at that, ok?" he said, looking away from her as he poured some coffee into a mug.
Rory nodded her head "Thanks Luke" she said, and as she turned to go back to her seat Luke, without looking up said, "You know, if you ever need me-".
Rory turned and smiled "You're a good friend, and I'm lucky to have you", and with that she walked back to her table, leaving Luke with a small smile on his face.
"All good?" Lorelai asked as Rory sat back down.
"With Luke? Yes" she said.
Rory, sitting in her Biology class, tapped her pen continuously on the table.
She was slightly relieved that Tristan wasn't at school, but she had prepared a rough speech for him- and had run through her head the way she thought their conversation might go.
But her thoughts were interrupted "Hey, do you mind taking your band elsewhere?" Paris said spitefully while looking down at the tapping pen.
Rory was taken aback by the sudden break of silence during study time.
"Oh, err, Sorry Paris" she whispered back, putting the pen on the table.
Paris turned back around and began writing again.
But then paused, thinking back to when she had seen Rory and Tristan, hand in hand yesterday.
She spun back around to look at Rory, startling her again, "And for you're information, I don't care about you and Tristan" she hissed, and then went back to her writing.
Rory was taken aback, and then remembered that Paris had seen them together, holding hands- oh god, this is the last thing I need.
"Look, Paris- things are really complicated, I don't know if there is a 'me and Tristan'. I am sorry for hurting you're feelings when you saw us together, but don't get so worked up about something that you know nothing about! Ok?" she whispered, and then leaned back in her chair and began flipping through the pages of her biology book.
Paris stopped writing again, and turned back around, staring at Rory coldly in the eye "What? Are you in some kind of bad mood because lover boys taken the day off and you have no body to lock lips with at lunch?" she spat back at her, and then waited for Rory's retaliation.
"Paris, I refuse to fight with you about this- you don't know the first thing about me, or Tristan- or me and Tristan as a couple, if that's what we are!" Rory said, and went back to her flipping.
The bell rang and Paris quickly picked up her books and ran out the door, and Rory felt instantly bad for being so cruel- she knew how much Paris loved Tristan, it was bad enough he didn't return the feelings, let alone see him with one of her, Rory was afraid to associate her and Paris as 'friends'.
She closed her eyes and breathed hard, god, that's why Paris was so upset- she must have thought she had consoled in her about her unrequited feelings for Tristan and Rory had gone and stamped all over them!
Rory quickly gathered up her books and ran out after Paris, finding her walking briskly back to her locker.
She ran to catch up with her "Paris, I am sorry- really, really sorry- but things are so conf-" Paris turned and cut Rory off.
"Why am I even upset? I mean look at you" she looked Rory up and down, tears beginning to swell in her eyes.
"Your perfect- pretty, smart, fun to hang round with- and me, well I'm just this controlling, stressful, geek!" she spluttered.
"Oh, Paris, no. You're beautiful, and really intelligent! I have no idea why Tristan is interested in me, I mean, when he could have you" Rory said, trying to comfort the now crying Paris.
Paris looked up at Rory, through her tears "Really?" she asked, bringing her hand to her eyes to brush away the tears.
"Truly" Rory said, smiling.
"Maybe your right" Paris said, and Rory rolled her eyes.
Now feeling a little embarrassed, having shown her feelings so openly to Rory- and all the other students who walked past them and saw her sobbing uncontrollably.
"I better go," she said, a little clearer.
"I'll see you later" Rory said, as she watched Paris walk towards her locker.
Rory turned and headed in the opposite direction, walking towards her own locker.
But as she turned the corner, she gasped, as she saw Dean leaning up against her locker, looking up and down the hallway, and looking for her.
Rory quickly got out of his view, by stepping back behind the corner.
Had he seen her? She peered cautiously around the corner, and saw he was still leaning against her locker.
'Don't run from him Rory' she said to herself quietly.
She took a few deep breaths and walked around the corner, Dean saw her straight away, and stood tall, looking directly at her.
He seemed terribly out of place, in his dark brown chord jacket, and jeans- standing amongst the students in their Chilton uniforms.
Rory walked towards him, slowly, neither of them took their eyes away from one another.
She finally approached her locker, and stood in front of him, feeling small compared to his great height.
"Why did I even come?" he said, throwing his hands in the air and turning around, ready to walk back the way he'd come.
As Rory had gotten closer to him, she saw that he had similar bruising on his face as Tristan.
And presumed he would have more, just the same as Tristan's, on the rest of his body.
"Dean! Wait" Rory called out after him. She swung open her locker and stuffed her bag inside, then ran in Dean's direction- out the doors.
He was easy to find, once again his casual clothes sticking out amongst the Chilton colours.
Dean stopped walking, but didn't turn around.
"Do you love him?" he said, still without turning.
Rory hesitated, leaving a big enough hesitant silence to make Dean start walking back to his car.
"DEAN! Can you just-" she threw her hands in the air, and was taken by surprise when she saw him turn to face her.
"Can I what? I don't owe you anything Rory- not after what you did to me!" and with that he turned, opened his car door and drove out of the school gates- all so quickly Rory wasn't even sure that their conversation had really just happened.
She felt powerless, like her life was spiralling downward, out of control- and she couldn't stop, or control any of what was happening around her.
Rory turned and began walking back into Chilton; thoughts clouding her head, thoughts of Dean; her 'boy next door' perfect boyfriend who she had betrayed and hurt in the worst way possible.
Tristan; once her enemy, now her-? She didn't know what her and Tristan were, or weren't for that matter. But she knew, that in the last few days, when their 'love affair' had first begun, she had felt things for him- love?
She didn't know, she didn't know anything any more.