Severus Snape- By: Sirius Black
"Your beautiful name is Severus Snape
You have the features of a hairless ape
All those of Gryffindore think you are a sinner
I'm proud cuz I filled your socks with Kraft Dinner
Your only friend is named hairy bob
You got me fired from my job
But still I say your perfect, though an ugly man
And I'd appreciate it if you'd get a tan
I'd be sad if you died
Why when I walk by you run and hide?
You'd pass out running around a track
But know you'll always have a friend named Sirius Black"