Konohamaru's Gift

Summary: To get some alone time with Hanabi, Konohamaru ships Naruto and co. off on a vacation. But will our heroes survive chaotic train rides, perverted teachers, stalkers, and other misadventures? Find out!

Disclaimer: I own nothing, besides The "Shinobi Sphere", Chibi-Kitsune, "Kitsune-pon", and the train. So far anyway…

"REALLY!?" exclaimed Naruto in shock. His friend nodded. "What's in it for you…?"

"Well… With her sister away, my sweet Hanabi-chan will finally go out with me!" yelled Konohamaru with a grin.

"So… You're giving me a free vacation for me and my friends… YOU ROCK!"

Naruto ran through the streets of Konoha searching for his friends, and bumped into a group.

"AHA!" yelled Naruto. He turned to the sand siblings and thrust the tickets in their hands and yelled. "COME OR DIIIIIIIIIIIIE!"

Then Naruto ran off to find the rest of his friends…

Later, Naruto, along with Sakura, Sasuke, Gaara, Temari, Kankuro, Lee, TenTen, Neji, Ino, Shikamaru, Chouji, Jiraya, Kakashi, Anko, and Hinata's team all sat outside the train station.

"Now before we go, we have to thank two very special people, besides me of course, for without whom, this vacation would never be possible!" yelled Naruto happily. Then he walked over to Hinata and pulled her forward. "Thanks to my good friend Konohamaru for the tickets! AND, thank you Hinata for coming."

"Uh… What's so special about me…?" asked a blushing Hinata. Naruto whispered something in her ear and everyone stared. Hinata turned away from Naruto with wide eyes and her mouth agape.

"What did you say to Hinata-chan!?" yelled Kiba. Before Naruto could respond, Hinata started yelling in a chibi version of her voice.

"I'M GONNA BE AN AUNTIE!" screamed Hinata excitedly as she ran around crazily. "I'M GONNA BE DA BESTEST AUNTIE IT DA WHOLE WIDE WORLD!"

Everyone gaped at the normally quiet girl, who was now screaming about birthday parties and gifts.

"Uh… Oops…" said Hinata with a red face. She ran into the train, and slowly everyone else followed her.

The inside of the train was interesting. On one side of the aisle, there was a huge buffet, and on the other was a row of seats of 2.

"Okay!" yelled Naruto. "I have made seating arrangements! Come here to see who you're paired with!"

"What's he up to…?" Ino asked Sakura, who shrugged.

"Probably is sitting next to me…" mumbled Sakura. She turned to the seating chart.

Kakashi-Anko

Kiba-Shino

Sasuke-TenTen

Neji-Gaara

Temari-Ino

Sakura-Lee

Shikamaru-Kankuro

Chouji-Jiraya

No One

No One

No One

Hinata

Naruto

Bathrooms

"Hey!" yelled Sakura. "What's up with this chart!? I'm not with Sasuke-kun!"

"Follow the chart or LEAVE!" yelled Naruto sternly. Everyone quietly got into their seats. Hinata turned to look behind her to see Naruto giggling like crazy.

"What's so funny Naruto-kun?" asked Hinata. Naruto looked up at her, then pulled her into the seat beside him.

"I have a funny prank in mind, but I need your help…" said Naruto, and began to whisper in Hinata's ear. Hinata never knew her face could get so red…

Naruto dragged Hinata into the bathroom, which was actually a room full of porta-potties. Naruto pulled Hinata into one, and Hinata gasped.

"Kyuubi eats humans…" said Naruto loudly. The back of the porta-potty opened and there was another room behind it. Hinata gasped and Naruto grinned and pulled her inside.

"This room… IT'S SO BIG!" yelled Hinata in shock. "HOW CAN IT FIT IN HERE!?"

"IT'S SO BIG! HOW CAN IT FIT IN HERE!?"

"What… Are… They… Doing…?" stammered Sakura as she turned to the bathroom's door.

"Naruto has become a man!" yelled Jiraya proudly. Sakura fainted dead away when she figured out what he meant.

"No way…" said Shino and Kiba. HINATA!?

Meanwhile, Anko was whistling, trying not to glance at Kakashi's book.

"Is something wrong Anko-chan…?" purred Kakashi. Anko's eyes widened and she took the book out of his hands and began reading it, and obviously enjoying it. 'I have found my soul mate…'

"No!" yelled Ino. "Now the perverts have turned a WOMAN into a pervert!"

"And Naruto and Hinata are making babies!" yelled Sasuke. Everyone stared at him. "What?"

"This is the coolest room I've ever seen…" said Hinata in awe. There was a big screen TV, a Shinobi Sphere hooked up to it, a pool table, three couches, a coffee table with snacks… Pure bliss…

"Yeah, well me and Konohamaru, your future brother in law heh heh, designed it!" chirped Naruto happily. "Hey… Have you ever played Kitsune-pon?"

"Yeah!" exclaimed Hinata with glittery eyes. "You have it?"

Naruto grinned and Hinata, empowered by videogame love and confidence, ran over to the Shinobi Sphere and turned it on. She motioned for Naruto to join her, so he walked over to the couch after picking up a controller.

In the game, Kitsune-pon, you first input your personality, then you design a fox. Your fox will interact, and sometimes fight, the other player's foxes. It was the most popular video game in Konoha.

Naruto's fox's fur was the same color as his hair, it had blue eyes, was giant, and had nine tails. Hinata's was a pale white with pale eyes like her's. It was small, and named Chibi-Kitsune, and Naruto's was named Kyuubi.

"Let's watch!" chirped Naruto as they set up the game. The players watched their foxes interact until a fight came, then the players took over.

In the Game…

"Hello Chibi-Kitsune!" chirped Kyuubi as he bounded over to the pale fox, who smirked.

"Hey baby… Miss me…?" purred the girl fox.

Naruto and Hinata…

"Uh… Hinata… Uh… Well… Uh… Are you a pervert?" stammered Naruto.

"When it comes to you Naruto-kun… Yesssss…" slurred Hinata. Naruto realized something was wrong with Hinata. Hinata pushed her hands inside Naruto's shirt and licked his cheek. Then Naruto noticed someone else was in the room. He turned and saw… Hinata?

"AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!"

"AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!"

"What was that?" asked Ino curiously as she peered over to where the bathroom was.

"CAN YOU SHUT UP!? I'M TRYING TO READ HERE!" roared Anko as she sat up and turned to the bathroom. Naruto came running out of it looking very very scared.

"What's up Naruto?" stammered Sakura. Hinata ran over to Naruto and whimpered.

"Get away from me!" yelled Naruto as he jumped into the buffet.

"NOOOOOOOOOOO!" yelled Chouji as he began to sob.

"No!" yelled Hinata. "There's someone else on this train! Naruto-kun, please… She switched with me when we turned on the video game!"

"Good, because I didn't think you were a pervert…" said Naruto as a matter of factly. "So come out, evil pervert Hinata!"

Everyone stared then the door to the bathroom opened again, and there was a Hinata.

"Where'd ya go Naruto honey…?" moaned the other Hinata. Hinata got mad and threw a kunai at the fake, and it turned into…

"HAKU!?" exclaimed Naruto and Sasuke in shock. "B-But… You're dead!"

"No my beloved Naruto…" purred Haku as he ran over to Naruto and kissed his hand, which was pulled away. "I did not die… I was reborn in fact… Make love to me my sweet!"

Naruto threw Haku out the window, and took Hinata back to the video game room.

"Nooooooooooooo…" said the last thing heard from Haku before the train sped past the patch of grass the Mist Nin landed on.

"Um… I'm just gonna start serving the food…" said a Kage Bushin, courtesy of Naruto.

"SHUT UP! IT WAS JUST GETTING HOT! Uh… I mean good…" said Anko angrily as she glared at the children, then went back to Icha Icha Paradise.

Well, what do you think? My first attempt at Naruto humor. I'm working on an action fic, but I don't know any of Hinata's or Ino's skills… Anyway, tell me what you guys think! Thanks!

Sevetenks, the Ultimate Fusion