The chapter that almost wasn't
Disclaimer: Sadly I don't own any anime...or Canada
But I do own a finger puppet
Actually I stole the finger puppet
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"Iruka sensei why were Kakashi sensei's hands down your pants?" 'Oh fuck' Iruka thought as he laughed nervously. "Well Billy when a man loves another man they do things." Iruka started "Things that make them both very happy... things that fell good." he added with a blush. "My mommy already told me that," sighed Billy "My daddy does stuff like that." finished the child. 'WTF?' thought Iruka as he sniffed the air 'Oh I smell therapy... and angst' "Does anyone smell angst!" shouted Iruka trying to change the subject. The class sniffed the air. "It's Billy." replied everyone but Billy. "Good" chirped Iruka "Everyone but Billy gets some 'Chips a' Ho'!" "Horary!" exclaimed everyone but Billy. And Billy cried.
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Meanwhile in heaven. "Zabuza do you think we'll ever be alive again?" asked a painfully gay gender confused teen. "I don't think so. Why do you ask Haku?" replied Haku's eyebrow less lover. "I just really want to see a bunny again." sighed Haku. Zabuza was left dumbfounded by his lover's new found bunny fetish. "That's right there are no bunnies in gay heaven because 'The Pope' bitches about homosexuality." Zabuza said after regaining his composure. "Yup that's about it." agreed Haku. Just then the two men heard the disembodied voice of God. "Zabuza and Haku I have just realized how homophobic I am so I'm sending you back to Earth." said God. With a big dramatic flash of blue light. Haku and Zabuza were sent back to Earth. "Horary!" chirped Haku "Let's go find some bunnies." Zabuza nodded absently while thinking of naughty things that one could do with a bunny. And the two skipped of to the forest.
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"What's that smell?" mumbled a confused random man. He lifted his head and scanned the street. Then he spotted two boys skipping down the road. It was Uzamaki Naruto and Uchiha Sasuke. "Oh it's just Uchiha angst." he said relieved. "Come on Sasuke lets go to the zoo." whined Naruto. "We have to get chocolate first." said an annoyed Sasuke. "That can wait till later we have to go see the koalas!" shouted the fox. "Fine we'll get chocolate later." hissed Sasuke. The truth was that Sasuke loved the zoo. He especially loved the llamas. They were so cute and carefree unlike himself. And the best part of all was that they didn't reek of angst. "Oh yeah!" chirped Naruto. So the two skipped off to the zoo.
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Gaara and Lee were bored. They had played in the sandbox for hours and had made countless suggestive sand castles. "I have a great idea." squeaked Lee "We should go to the zoo." Gaara sighed he hated places that had lots of people and the zoo definitely was one of those places. "Do we have to?" whined young Kazegage. "Gaara you're too antisocial we have to get out of the sandbox for a change!" stated Lee. "But I fell safe in the sandbox." whimpered the eyebrowless boy. "We're going to the zoo and that is final!" shouted Lee. "Fine." mumbled Gaara as he started to produce angst.
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Naruto and Sasuke had just arrived at the zoo and were now looking for a map. "Hey do you smell angst Sasuke?" questioned Naruto. "It's not me!" exclaimed Sasuke who had cheered up upon arriving at the zoo. Naruto looked towards the smell and saw Konaha's strangest couples. Lee and Gaara were skipping in their direction. The two couple met and exchanged hellos. "Hey Naruto." said Lee. "Hi caterpillar brows." smiled Naruto. "Sauke Uchiha." muttered Gaara. "Gaara...hey what's your last name?" questioned Sasuke. "Yeah you are a pretty important character yet we don't know your last name." said Naruto with a nod. "I don't think my last name is important." sneered Gaara. "Why not?" asked Lee. "I'm the only one cool enough to go by one name." said Gaara with a smirk.
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kamakazikoala- Yup more crack I hope you liked it but if you were offended don't read any more of this story.