Sorrow and Loss

I hate these kinds of Caring Missions. Soulful thought sadly. He was being flown down to Earth with Regal Heart Lioness. On a normal mission Soulful would've been happy for the company and be in a far better mood than the one he was in.

But this wasn't a normal. Not for Soulful anyway. Usually he'd deal with kids who lashed out or were being hurt by people who did the same. This was the first time he'd actually been on a mission to talk to with someone who had to deal with a death, even if it was a pet instead of a human being.

Soulful shuddered. Before he joined the Care Bear Family he'd been unaware of the near-immortality that they—and he—held. But to brush up against the fact that not everyone shared that same longevity and trying to console those who had to deal with mortality…Soulful shuddered again. The thought of someone in the Family dying was as unpleasant a thought as any he could imagine…and Soulful knew a thing or two about unpleasant images. He surreptitiously spared a glance over at Regal Heart. The lioness' thoughts were probably paralleling the fox's own.

Soulful checked over the brief they'd gotten for this mission. A lifelong family pet had died. Most of the family was at home, already being consoled by other Care Bears. But one of the children was away at college and had only just been called about the news. He was their assignment.

"We're here." Regal Heart said. Soulful would've preferred it if the trip had been a bit longer…anything to put off this job. But there was no avoiding it.

"Let's go." Soulful said reluctantly. The two Cousins were an odd sight to see on a college campus, as evident by the stares they received, but nothing really came of it. They walked into the dorm they were sent to and rapped lightly on the door.

Soulful swallowed as he heard the door unlock and swing open. Inside stood the person they had come to see, looking—understandably—depressed. He had apparently guessed why they were here and took on a more mournful look.

"Come in." He mumbled, beckoning them forward with a jerk of his head. Closing the door behind them, he ignored the Cousins for a moment as he plopped down on his bed. "Go on, do your thing…then leave me alone." Regal Heart and Soulful exchanged glances. Neither wanted to be the one to get the ball rolling. In the end, Regal Heart turned away first.

"Yeah, well…" She cleared his throat. "We're here for you to talk to. What you're going through can't be easy or pleasant…" An unpleasant, sarcastic-sounding snort was the only response she got. Soulful—at a loss—tried to remember the boy's name…John or Jacob or something like that.

"It's Jonah." Soulful flinched as he felt the boy's—Jonah's—gaze on him. "My name is Jonah. I could see you trying to remember." Soulful felt his face heat at being so transparent, and for having forgotten it.

"Good one. Way to get his trust!" He cursed to himself. It was Regal Heart who spoke up again.

"We're here to help—" She started again. Jonah let out a bitter laugh.

"Help? I didn't know Care Bears—or their Cousins, whatever—could raise the dead."

"Well, actually we can't—"

"Then what help can you possibly be?" Jonah demanded.

"Jonah," Soulful said speaking up for the first time so far. "I know it hurts, but—"

"But what?" Jonah said, his voice taking on a croaking quality. "I had Lucy for fourteen years…she was family, dog or no." Tears started rolling down his face. He wiped them away. "Look." He made his way over to his laptop and closed all the screens until the desktop was all that could be seen. "That's Lucy."

Soulful and Regal Heart stood on their toes for a better look. Sure enough, there on the desktop was a picture of a happy looking dog, tongue lolling out and eyes gazing right into the camera that had taken the picture. She was a black and brown furred dog, a Gordon Setter, Jonah said. Soulful had to admit, that was a very cute dog. He could see why it was so painful to know that Jonah would never see her again.

A sob broke out. "She was the best pet I ever had. I remember…throwing tennis balls out for her to chase and fetch in the backyard….then she got too old and couldn't run anymore…she couldn't even see the balls when they were right in front of her eyes."

That seemed to break whatever reserve he'd built up around himself and he started crying. Soulful and Regal Heart looked at each other. They knew that five…ten…fifty…a hundred years down the line they'd both look the same way they'd do now—barring an accident or something. Aging for most Care Bears stopped when they hit maturity. None of them would ever have to see one another gradually waste away…Soulful hadn't really seen how lucky they were until now.

"She got old, she got blind, her eyes went white, her fur thinned, she lost weight, her sense of smell was practically gone…" Jonah cried. "She couldn't even go up and down stairs anymore. She just kept falling down…" He tried wiping his face but more tears just took the place of those that he wiped away.

"And the worst part of it…" He trailed off. They could see he needed encouragement.

"Go on." Soulful said as kindly as he could.

"The worst part is—" Jonah wept taking off his glasses so he could wipe his eyes, "—Is that I didn't spend enough time with her. I was too damn lazy to get up and take her for walks or throw balls for her or just sit down and brush and pet her…I tried telling myself that I was too busy, but that's a lie. I could've done it…I just didn't feel like it. And then when she got too old to walk or play fetch with…I avoided her. I didn't want to be reminded that she was getting old and wouldn't be around forever."

He sat down on his bed again and buried his face in his hands. Soulful and Regal Heart climbed up the bed and sat down on either side of him. "All that time I could've spent with her gone and now I'll never have that chance again…"

"It's okay, it's okay…" Regal Heart said as she laid a paw on Jonah's leg.

"No it is NOT! It's not okay! It will never by 'okay!' About a year ago we got another dog, a puppy named Maggie. And we let Lucy get overshadowed by her. Maggie could do all the things we used to do with Lucy…and in another ten, maybe twelve years we'll just have to got through the same thing with Maggie!"

"Jonah—" Soulful said. He didn't even know if he was heard.

"I still remember buying Lucy in Pennsylvania when I was seven or eight and driving her home…She was a little puppy…And now she's dead! Just like Maggie's going to be in a decade or so!" Soulful looked at Regal Heart in worry, Jonah was starting to sound hysterical. "My grandparents are in their Eighties, they wont be around for much longer either…and my parents, God, my parents are already in their Fifties!" He was starting to shake. "And my baby brother just had his Bar Mitzvah last week…everyone's getting old and is gonna…I don't want to be alone! I don't want to be alone!"

Pale and wracked with sobs Jonah practically fell over, only narrowly avoiding crushing Soulful, as he buried his head in his pillows. Regal Heart, taking the lead—which for once Soulful was very grateful for—walked over and started gently rubbing Jonah's back.

Soulful's attention was turned by the sound of someone tapping at the window. Outside, sitting in a hovering cloud car, was Gentle Heart. Opening the window, Gentle Heart hopped out of the cloud car, which promptly dissipated.

"How's it going?" She asked Soulful softly. He just gestured towards the bed. "Oh, no…" She said sadly as Soulful started filling her in. "The poor boy." Soulful just nodded.

"Anything you can do? I'm out of my depth here…" Soulful had considered having Regal Heart talk about his own bitter experience with someone dying but abandoned the thought. Making him feel bad for mourning a dog when Regal had lost her parents would only end up guilting him…not a great solution.

Gentle Heart just nodded though. Making her way onto the bed she sat down next to Jonah's head and gently began stroking his hair. "Shhhh, it's alright, it's alright…We're here for you, you're family's here for you. You're not alone." She said, her voice barely more than a whisper, "You're not alone."

Jonah lifted his face from the pillows and readjusted his bent glasses. His eyes were red. "Lucy's still dead." He croaked, his voice raw.

"I know." She said softly and sadly. "I know. I also know that it hurts. It hurts so bad that you wish you couldn't feel anymore. Am I right?" He nodded. "But you see, it's good that you feel this way. If you didn't feel anything for the pet you've had for all those years, what would that mean? Caring sometimes means getting hurt. But not caring at all is even worse." Jonah sniffled but didn't argue.

"Thank you…" He murmured, gesturing to include Regal and Soulful.

"Maybe you should head back home and spend some time with your family." Soulful suggested. "Talking to them might help more." Regal nodded.

"I know that's how my kids feel when they're down." She agreed.

"I guess so." Jonah agreed.

"We can have someone come down in the morning to pick you up. We'll just let your parents know first." Gentle Heart said. Jonah nodded and gave another quiet thanks. He looked weary. Tired to the point of exhaustion. "I think we should go and let you rest. We'll see you tomorrow." Gentle Heart said as she gave him a hug. "Please don't be sad for too long." She got a smile and a barely audible promise in return as he hugged her back. Regal and Soulful also bade their goodbyes as they made their way out.

"Are you okay?" Gentle Heart asked them as she 'Called' a new cloud car to take them back home.

"I guess so." Regal said as Soulful nodded. "I think I'm starting to see why Pace wants to help animals...it'll help people too."

"You think he'll be okay?" Soulful asked, nodding his head back the way they came.

"I think so." Gentle Heart said as she took the wheel, waiting for the others to climb in before starting the car. "I think so."

THE END

In Loving Memory

LUCY

(1991-2005)

Soulful Heart Fox is © to me and Pace and Regal Heart Lioness are © to Mariel. Gentle Heart Lamb and other Care Bear related concepts are © to their respective owners.

This is, sadly, an entirely true story, except for the Care Bears. Wish they could come. I just got a call two or three hours ago from my brother that Lucy died. I just sat down and put everything I felt into this, except for the occasionally break to wipe my eyes. Sorry to get everyone so down but I needed to tell this story.

Hopefully I'll be back to writing my other stories soon. Thanks for reading.