Chapter 8

Roy tried in vain to make his appearance even more perfect than it already was, straightening his collar, and smoothing down his tuxedo, but it was still in vain, as Major Armstrong had told him a dozen times before in what should have been Maes Hughes's place. His face darkened as his thoughts strayed to his best friend, wondering how the over-doting father would have prepped him and given him a pep talk before his walk down the aisle, but one simple fact remained.

Maes Hughes wasn't there.

Nor would he be since his murder.

Riza and everyone at work had tried their best to soothe him and cheer him up, even Havoc had tried to lift his spirits, but the hatred would not abate, nor would the pain. Maes wouldn't have wanted him to be mourning during his wedding, Maes would have killed him for doing it in the first place.

He sighed and he thought that life just wasn't fair. He had lost too many things, but had gained precious little in return. He had gained Riza, but lost Maes and more significant others had been torn from his life forever. Was what he gained really worth everything he had lost?

He decided, no, it wasn't. Even Riza wasn't worth everything he had lost so many years before. If he hadn't lost anything back then, there would not be a thing to gain now. He hated to think it, but it was perfect logical sense. Had he not lost what he had, he would be a married man long before today, that he was certain of.

Armstrong sensed his change in mood and laid a large hand on his shoulder, his head bowed. "I know that of which you lost, Colonel, but now is not the time to grieve."

Roy straightened his act and cast one long look at the pocketwatch lying on the tabletop. "You're right, Major... I've had more than enough time to grieve..." Armstrong nodded approvingly, and he too looked at the watch sadly. "She was a sweet little girl, Colonel, she would not approve of you this way."

"I know... but..."

"No buts, what is done is done and cannot be erased. Breaking down now will not bring them back. You can only live the rest of your life as well as you can."

Roy nodded.

"I was there as well, Colonel, and I share your grief, though I knew her for only a short time. It has been difficult and futile to erase it from my mind, and I know it must torment you, but please, don't grieve for her when you love another. She would want you to live out your life happily."

"I understand, Major. I won't... You won't tell Riza, will you?"

"I cannot promise that I won't. She has a right to know."

"... do what you will then. I give you my permission, and bear no ill feelings."

"Yes."

Armstrong left the room and Roy slammed his fists onto the dresser in front of him, tears beading in his eyes. The pocketwatch wobbled and fell to the floor, popping open, but Roy took no heed of it, wiping his eyes and striding out of the room.

Leroy was seated on a park bench, watching with fascination as Alphonse, with his restored body, conducted the kitty chorus through a short piece of opening music for the wedding. Ilia put her hand on his knee and he looked at her, smiling broadly.

"Our boy's big day, huh?" he put his arm around her shoulder and flicked some stray brown hair out of her -as he tactfully put it- beautifully slanted eyes. No one dared call her eyes squinty for it would incur the dual wrath of a very protective husband and a rather itchy fingered son who had happened to have gotten the same eye genes.

"Yes, it's his special day all right. You think it will work out this time?"

"I'm sure it will. There's nothing that's going to happen like before."

"But what about all that unrest in Ishbal? What if... if..."

Leroy shook his head. "Now now, there's nothing to worry about," he said, although there was a note of uncertainty in his voice, and a touch of fear. "We can hope for Roy's sake that nothing happens, Ilia, nothing like last time."

Terra was helping Ed set up tables and chairs, while Al finished his session with the chorus and helped Winry unroll a rather long carpet down the aisle, though he was looking at her more than he did the carpet.

Riza settled the veil over her face and blushed, thinking of how her husband-to-be would react when he saw her in this waterfall of pure white. She had never worn anything so plain yet so beautiful, but it was regretful that she would only wear it once in her lifetime. In the back of her mind though, she hoped to never wear it more than the initial once, she hoped that her impending marriage to Roy Mustang would work out for the better.

Terra bounced in rather happily and commented Riza on her appearance, helping her straighten the gown. "Do you still have your guns on you?" she asked. Riza shook her head, saying that she doubted she would need them today. Terra nodded sagely and rested her chin on her fist, hunched over in a chair. "Big Brother isn't looking as happy as I thought he'd be. He looks like he's about to scream, punch someone, and start crying all at once." Riza paused in fiddling with her hair and looked over her shoulder at Roy's sister.

"Do you have any idea why?" Terra's face clouded a bit and she looked at her hands, debating on whether to tell her or not. "You mean he hasn't told you yet?"

Riza was mystified. "Told me about what?"

Terra shrugged one shoulder uncomfortably. "Oh, I wasn't... I shouldn't..."

Riza put her fists on her hips. "Tell me."

"I don't really know, honest! It's just... something bad happened when I was four years old, and Roy... well he was kinda depressed for a long time. I honestly couldn't tell you what happened!" she said, evading the answer. "If you want to know, you should ask Havoc or Armstrong!"

Riza picked her dress from off of the floor and searched for Havoc, who was leaning dangerously close to the punch/wine. She flicked the cigarette out of his mouth and into an ash tray and he stared at her sullenly. "Of all people, the Colonel. You could have told me." It was obvious he was embarassed, and maybe slightly jelous as well, but he didn't want to jeoperdize his precarious long-standing friendship with Roy. He felt a little better that it had been Roy who had told him straight out, instead of having to figure it out and then feel betrayed.

"Is there anything that happened to Roy that I should know about?"

Havoc looked surprised and his eyes darted for a distraction. "Uh, I don't know, what kind?"

"Something, anything."

"Uhm... well..."

"Jean! Please tell me!"

His hands jumped to his collar. "I-I don't know, Riza, I shouldn't be the one telling you! By all rights, it should be Roy, or Maes at least..." his voice faltered on mentioning Maes, another old friend. He took a deep breath. "Maes... he would have told you by now... but I'll tell you since he's not here."

"Before the Ishbal war erupted, there were small riots on the borders of Amestris and Ishbal; you know that. Roy, Maes, and I, we were about sixteen then, just entered the military along with Armstrong, who was a few years older than us. Roy... knew an Ishbalan girl named Keira... and they got married."

Riza wasn't sure how to take this new piece of information.

"Don't get the wrong idea, he didn't force her or anything, they just decided and Keira wanted a house a little bit east of Risenbool, closer to the border of Ishbal. Keira was a great lady, very nice, sweet, and open minded or she would never have married Roy. A few months after, they had a child, a daughter, named Gale."

Havoc's nervousness intensified and he forced himself to keep breathing.

"S-she was just three years old... a year before the Ishbal War erupted... when..." he swallowed hard. "She was killed. Her and her mother, and we were walking right down the road. If we had been just a little bit faster... if we had gotten there earlier..." he stopped completely, shoulders shaking. He mastered his emotions and looked up at her again. "We were too late. We heard Kiera scream in the house, and there were three shots fired, and everything was quiet, then Gale bolted out of the house as fast as she could, crying her eyes out.

"Roy took one look at her and started running as hard as he could. We weren't expecting anything like this, none of us were ready to fight, I was fumbling with my gun, Armstrong couldn't use his alchemy, neither could Roy. Maes was unarmed. We weren't ready... She looked at him and started running for him, and just as she reached him..." Riza could practically see a little girl running for Roy, all the bloodshed behind her, a man with a gun stepping out from the house. "Bang," was all Havoc said. "She fell down against Roy, and I think he went into shock. He just kneeled there for two minutes, ten, I have no idea. Time was horribly skewed for me right then, I couldn't think straight. I saw the guy in front of them with the gun, and I just raised up my arm and-" he held up his arms and mimicked pulling the trigger.

"It was horrible... Roy didn't look up once through the whole thing, just sort of stared. Then she looked at him, and said-"

" 'I love you Daddy.' "

Havoc and Riza's heads pulled up sharply and stared at Roy.

"That was the last thing she said to me. Then she died." Roy bowed his head and strode out of the area as fast as he could, back to the room. "Roy, wait!" Riza cried, pulling up her skirts and running after him. He had one hand on the door when she caught him firmly by the wrist.

"Why didn't you tell me?"

He pulled his wrist away roughly, and stared her in the eyes. "I... How could I? All these years, and I still haven't... I couldn't tell anyone. It hurt too much."

"Do you want to get married, Roy? Again?"

He pulled her into his arms and held her there, face buried into her hair. "I... at first, I had second thoughts. I was so young back then Riza, I couldn't take it... Now I know, this is what she would have wanted. I have to keep going. I want to get married, Riza, again."

"I... I promise nothing will happen to me, Roy."

"No, I promise you, that I will protect you until the last drop of life leaves me. I'll never be too late again, ever. I promise."

She spotted the pocketwatch on the floor and walked over to it, bending over to pick it up, then grimacing and holding her stomach. Roy's eyebrows rose and he took her arm, guiding her to a chair. He sat opposite of her as she examined the pocket watch, and he examined her.

"She was beautiful, Roy. Both of them were." He gave her a sad smile. "She would have been fourteen yesterday."

An Ishbalan woman and an Amestran man...

"I know what you're thinking. I didn't find out until later, in the middle of the war, who had killed my family."

She waited.

"An Ishbalan killed my daughter, but it was a military weapon that took Keira from me."

"So that's when you decided... to become Fuhrer?"

"It is."

She was silent, but he spoke again.

"So how far along are you? Looks about four months, but looks can be decieving." She yelped and held her stomach, jumping in the chair a little from his straight forward manner. "H-how?"

"How? I had a daughter, remember, and I was thirteen when my mother was pregnant with my sister." he winked at her. "I know these things. I was there when Maes's wife was going to have Elysia too, I'm her godfather, you know."

"It's four months."

"Really? Looks about six, he's a big one then?"

"I don't know."

"Of course you don't," he said, as if the news was confidential.

"Are you ready to go, Roy?"

"I am. Are you, Miss Mommy?" he laughed, getting up from the chair and walking out.