Rescued

Chapter 14

Warning: This chapter contains an explicit love scene.

"Can I stay here with you?"

His heart fluttered. "Yes, of course." He tried to answer calmly, but his body pulsed with the sensation of her against him; her bottom in his lap, her breast pressed against his arm -- all sensations he had previously overlooked because of their serious conversation.

Dear gods, could he make it through a night with this woman chastely in his bed?

Tonks sighed pleasantly and nuzzled against his neck. "You know, I didn't realize how wound up I was today until I came here. I bickered with my mother, ranted at the barrister." She laughed. "I even told Arthur to flip off. Don't worry, he was very understanding."

Remus stroked her hair. "I told Arthur that we were together yesterday."

"Well, he probably figured that out from the photos in The Prophet. Honestly, he was just trying to be kind. It was me. I was on pins and needles from that Malfoy article, and everything and everyone set me off all day long."

Then tilting her head to the side, a slight smile hinting on her lips, Tonks whispered, "Except you." She traced the scars that ran across his cheek with her fingertips. "You make me calm. You make me feel…peaceful."

"And I'm much less expensive than a day at the sea," he joked, feeling a bit embarrassed by her kind words.

"A day at the seaside is relaxing. For a day. But I'm thinking I'd like to stay with you for much longer. One of those 'it would be nice for a life time' sort of deals."

So there it was. Tonks bit her lip and held her breath as she awaited his reaction.

Remus was speechless. When his blue eyes just stared at her with amazed bewilderment, her cheeks flushed pink.

"Maybe I shouldn't have said that."

"No, I just… I just don't know what to say." Remus laughed nervously. "I've never thought much about the future. I've never thought much farther ahead than the next full moon, really."

His words pulled at her heart. "That's no way to count the years, Remus," she chided, standing and pulling him up. "But we don't have to talk about it now."

And they didn't. She needed time…and maybe he did, too.

"But I can think about it, right?" His brow was tense, his blue eyes sharp. "About…about…" For some reason, he couldn't frame the words.

"About a wife, kids, a home of your own? Of course!" she replied, shaking her head as she led him from library to hallway, a flutter of hope in her chest. "And maybe we can even think about it together."

Then she stopped and turned around abruptly to add, "Let me rephrase that. I'd like to think about it together." She moved to her tip toes and swiftly kissed him. "But not tonight. I really am so tired."

"Yes, alright," Lupin added, feeling a sense of absolute wonder and amazement at this petite, feisty female who led him so easily from library to bedroom; who moved so effortlessly into his heart, awakening his dreams, renewing his faith in something he'd long since given up dreaming about -- a family of his own.

"So Mum apparently took all my clothes home last week. Can I borrow a shirt or something?" Tonks was looking at Remus, whose only response was a blank stare and a slight smile. "Hello, mate?"

"Yes, right. What did you say?"

Tonks laughed heartily and ran her hands through her strawberry hair. "Wotcher, Remus! You always make me laugh! I said I need a shirt to sleep in." Then with an impish grin, she asked, "What about this one?"

Maybe she wasn't as tired as she thought. There was just something about Remus that she found so darned sexy. She was already pushing off his cardigan and working her way onto the second button without resistance by the time he offered, "Wouldn't you rather have a fresh one?"

Tonks licked her lips, completely focused now on button three. "Uhm, no."

His breathing became unsteady as she reached the final button and began to tug his shirt tail out of his trousers.

"Has anyone ever told you how incredible you smell?" Tonks asked as she pushed the shirt off his shoulders, revealing a white undershirt underneath. Then stepping closer as his hands were caught in sleeves and he was bound to her teasing, she whispered hotly against his lips, "I must confess, when you were away on missions, I used to come into your room and smell your shirts and think about…" She smiled lasciviously. "Well, let's just say naughty thoughts."

Remus stood dumbstruck and completely aroused, as Tonks whipped the shirt from his arms and exited into his bathroom.

"I'll be out in five, pet." Walking away quickly, she knew she left him flabbergasted. But she liked the control, liked knowing that she still had the power to seduce and to tease -- even if it was her proper professor.

As soon as Tonks shut the door, Remus realized that his groin was aching. Even walking to his dresser to remove his trousers was painful. He changed into flannel pajamas, losing the battle to quell the arousing mental image of Tonks secretly rummaging through his things and exciting herself with his scent.

"Dear gods," he whispered, his forehead dropping against the cool wood of his dresser doors as he attempted to decrease the fire of his thoughts and the flame of his physical desires.

"Okay, ready! This is a little shorter than I thought it would be," she said as she swung open the bathroom door.

Remus stepped back. His shirt barely covered her hips, revealing long naked legs; and the top two buttons hung open, showing the smooth skin of her chest.

"You look incredible," he said with more reaction than thought.

Tonks giggled. "Really?"

"Maybe, maybe I should sleep on the couch," he said tightly with his arms crossed and brow tense.

She began to pull back the bed covers. "Why?"

"Honestly, Nymphadora, it's not that I can't trust myself; but you've got me in a bit of situation here," he replied, tapping nervous fingers against his arms.

Tonks halted, dark eyes twinkling. She could see his situation, but part of her had to ask anyway. "What situation, Remus?"

"Well, you're very, very sexy; and there are some things, physically speaking, that I cannot control when you're in my bedroom, half dressed and pulling down my bed covers."

Tonks approached him and stopped just inches away, teasing him with her closeness and her words. "Remus John Lupin, are you trying to tell me that I excite you?"

"Yes," he whispered, a willing victim to her seduction.

She kissed him, and he responded with passionate enthusiasm. As her body touched his, the manifestation of his desire pressed long and hard against her own thigh. Finally, he pulled away, shaking his head.

"But you're not ready. You said it yesterday." He forced himself to step back and vowed with a strained voice, "I can wait for you."

It was true. She didn't think she was ready to engage in the sexual act. The thought of a man on top of her, pushing her down….the loss of control, even with someone she trusted, frightened her.

Yet, at the same time, being here with Remus at that very moment, she desired him. She wanted to explore his body, to relish in the warmth of his skin, to touch the flame of his manhood.

She hadn't expected to feel so lusty tonight. She was tired. But something…maybe it was his scent or his eyes, or his kind words; he was seducing her, as well, with everything that defined his masculinity and his gentle heart.

"You're right. I don't think I'm ready for some things," she replied, taking his hand gently. "But I would like to get know you better tonight. I mean, if you're ready."

He didn't exactly know what she meant, as his experience with women was limited to a few hand jobs and a couple of one-night stands; but whatever she was offering, he was definitely interested and intensely curious. "I'm ready."

As she led him to back to the bed, they kissed again; and she finally urged him to sit on the edge of the mattress as she straddled his lap, rocking against the rock, separated only by cotton and flannel.

They continued to kiss deeper and more fiercely, until he asked, voice panting, "Can I touch you?" His blue eyes flickered up at her with love and desire.

Biting her lip, unknowing of her body's response, she silently moved his hands to her breasts. She shivered with desire as his thumbs played over soft and hard spots; and his voice shook when he said, "Tell me if you want me to stop."

He slowly unbuttoned her shirt to the fourth button, revealing her small, snowy breasts. His battered hands gently glided over the smooth palette of her shoulders and finally over each tender, rounded mound. "You're so beautiful," he whispered and pulled her to his lips, dipping his head to suckle at her bosom.

Tonks closed her eyes and relished the sensation of this man worshiping her tenderly with his tongue. It felt good, really good, as it had been a very long time since she'd had a lover; and Remus was already proving to be a kind, respectful and mindful one.

Opening her eyes slightly, she allowed her hands to play through his graying hair and even laughed slightly as she realized this was Remus Lupin -- reserved Hogwarts professor, conservative bachelor. And here he was, lusty as hell over her.

He pulled back. "You're laughing."

"I'm happy," she replied, smiling ecstatically. This was right.

"So am I." Remus returned her smile and they kissed, tumbling back into the bed where they touched and explored one another by candlelight without shame. Remus even allowed Tonks to remove his undershirt and finger his ghastly scars, which she did with a curiosity completely devoid of disgust.

"They don't frighten you?" he asked seriously.

"No," she replied frankly. "It takes more than some measly werewolf scars to frighten me. Anyway, they're just scars. They're just skin that didn't mend smoothly."

They kissed more, and before long, her shirt was completely unbuttoned; and she felt beautiful before his eyes. She trusted him and knew in her heart that this man would be her first and her last great love. Inspired, she began pulling off his pajama bottoms.

"Are you sure about this?" he asked.

She answered boldly, "I want to see you." Then nuzzling against him, she whispered in his ear, "I want to see the man that I made love with in the desert." In truth, she was as curious as a cat.

It was the first time Remus had lain fully naked with a woman, and he looked away, ashamed of thin limbs and scarred skin, as her eyes glazed over his naked flesh.

She could tell he was nervous, his eyes glancing away as hers were drinking him in. His body was long and lean, his pale flesh crisscrossed with a gluttony of scars; some thick and jagged but most small and fine. Between his legs, the size of his desire was large and aching…aching for her touch. Wotcher, she wanted him! Mind, body and soul…

Suddenly, she held him close and gripped his desire in her palm, exclaiming, "Gods Remus! You're so hot!" It wasn't poetry. It wasn't a great confession or a love song, but in her heart, it was the unadorned truth. She found his body very desirable and lusted for him.

He moaned as she pulled against his hardened arousal, her womanliness surrounding him as she entangled herself against his lean body. Instinctively, his fingers found her wetness and played against her need, evoking soft, guttural cries. His hands were not those of a skilled lover. He was awkward but eager to please; and with a little guidance, he was sending her flying.

But his hands were not enough. She needed him. She needed to consecrate her love through that ancient and sacred act. The deep longing that ached in her chest could only be quieted when she became his woman in every way. It was a shocking revelation, even to her own consciousness; but nonetheless, it was true and she couldn't deny herself any more than she could deny his love for her.

"I love you," she said, nearly crying as she guided his flesh into her womb.

Suddenly, a warm wetness squeezed around his arousal, and he knew that they had moved from simple exploration to making love.

"Oh, Nymphadora," he wept as she moved against him with aching cries, until suddenly she violently shook; and in her climax, he found his release, as well.

"My god! I never meant for that to happen, but it was wonderful!" she cried, her voice joyful as tears rushed from her eyes. She had been so afraid, but their lovemaking had been healing. She had control, but she also had greater things now, like trust and love. Nymphadora Tonks had found her man.

Silent sobs were still shaking Remus' body. He was sweating, and he was tired and bewildered and scared and, most importantly, he was in love. Completely and utterly in love.

"Remus, are you okay?" Tonks said, wiping his damp brow with her fingertips, her voice cooing.

He tried to smile, but for some reason, he kept crying. "I love you."

"I love you, too." She threw her arms around him, trying to still his shaking body. "I love you, too. It's going to be alright. Everything is alright now."

His fears suddenly took realization. "Everyone I love…" His voice dropped to a whisper, as if he were afraid the fates would hear his words. "Everyone I love dies."

Tonks' first instinct was to tell him that wasn't true, but she knew denying his statement would be a lie. So, instead, she faced his fears head on.

"You've lost more friends and experienced more hardship in your life than anyone should have to face alone. But, Remus, you're not alone anymore," she said firmly. "James had Lily, Sirius had Harry; and now, I have you. And I plan on being around for a long time."

Remus wiped his face with the back of his hand. "I don't deserve you."

"No one deserves me. At least that's what my mother says."

They laughed together and, finally, he pulled away slightly, regaining his usual pleasant persona as he stroked her hair and marveled upon her heart-shaped face, tears dried. "I'm sorry for getting that emotional. I think it's just…it's just that I've never made love like that before."

"You mean side by side?" Tonks asked, pulling up the blankets to their chins.

"That and…I don't know. It was just very emotional. Does that make sense?" He reflected for a moment. "Dora, you probably know this already, woman's intuition or something, but I'm not very experienced with women and with… making love."

"I suspected, but in my humble opinion, you did a very nice job." Then cozying closer to him, she added, "If it's any consolation, it was very emotional for me, too."

"I didn't think you were ready," he said quietly.

"Neither did I and then suddenly I realized making love to you was something I needed to do, something that I really wanted to do." She kissed his shoulder. "I want to be your woman in every sacred way."

He pulled her closer. "You are my woman. Didn't I tell you that in Kazakhstan?"

She smiled, and there was a long silence between them.

"A penny for your thoughts," she lilted, dark eyes looking into his distant blue ones.

"What we just did…" He looked at her deeply. "It was incredible and, at some point, probably when you ripped off my clothes," he chuckled, and then became serious again, "I realized that this was the first time that I've ever allowed myself to be that emotionally involved during the act, during…love making."

Tonks, who lived her entire life emotionally engaged with the world, looked at him with puzzlement.

"Please don't think I'm callous, it's just that when you're…when you're a werewolf and people say horrible things about you and to you, you learn to shut them out. After a while, you start shutting everything out, even emotion. You become hard. Not regarding everything…not hardened to justice or friendship. Just…emotionally distant from moments that speak of a stronger kind of attachment."

He paused and took her hand for comfort. "I know it may seem strange to you, but this is the first time that I've ever been with someone and allowed them to look upon my body… on my scars."

Suddenly, she understood; reasoning this was probably the first time that Remus had fully made love to a woman without hiding beneath clothing or darkness. He had literally and metaphorically lain himself completely naked before her. He had given her his full trust, as well.

"Remus, you've been distant to protect yourself, to protect your heart. I know. I've seen it a thousand times from you, but I've seen little acts of kindness just as many times."

Running fingers over his eyelids, she whispered, "Don't worry. I've seen the man behind the mask, the passionate flame beneath the calm of your pale eyes. You do what you must to protect your heart, but not from me. In private, never hide yourself from me. Neither your thoughts nor your body, okay?"

"I won't. I promise."

"That's my love," she whispered against his lips.

He smiled and kissed her crown. "And that's my woman."

And they held each other gently, falling asleep in one another's arms.

tbc