To Forget The Unforgettable
By: Youkai Dreams
Disclaimer- I own Sesshoumaru, FINALLY! -sweatdrop- Oh, was I dreaming again? DAMNIT! This time, I was sooooo close, but I still don't own them (but in dreamland, they're alllll mine). Too bad this is reality, huh?
A/N: Hey guys. I'm soooo sorry I haven't updated in a long while, but, my comp had a virus and erased Microsoft Word from my computer altogether, so I had to re-write everything, which took a while, but I hope this chapter turned out as good as the one I wrote before (Sighs). Yeah… Anyways, keep telling me in reviews if I'm still keeping the characters in character… it isn't hard to do. If I think they are, then I think you will too cause, as many of you probably know, I am picky about these things. For Kagome, not that any of you have complained, but remember, she lost her memory; she is twenty, but she thinks she is fifteen. Naraku has been defeated, and the jewel completed (OMG, I RHYMED!)… So Kagome should act a little scared of these things, although she acts scared in the regular series anyways so ya... Anyway, onto the story!
Chapter Eight: And So, The Training Begins
Sesshoumaru gazed at the darkened soil beneath him as he replicated what had just happened in his mind. Bandits had mistaken his appearance for a human, and attacked him thinking they would gain riches; instead, they gained early release from this world.
¸.·´¸.·´¨) ¸.· Flashback! ¸.·´¸.·´¨) ¸.·¨
"You there, stop now or perish!" One man screamed as he rode up to Sesshoumaru on his horse, sword drawn, ready to fight.
Sesshoumaru glared at him. "You dare to challenge me?"
The man laughed. "You are very smart, indeed. Are you the one known as Sesshoumaru?"
Sesshoumaru turned to face the aged man completely. "This is of no concern to you."
The man scowled. "It is a big concern to me. Remember this face, because it shall be the last one you see."
The man stared into Sesshoumaru's eyes and felt utter disappointment when he was met with nothing… no fear, nothing. He was disappointed further when he managed to trace slight amusement..
Sesshoumaru detected the faint sounds of countless horses approaching, and figured they were the rest of the man's men. He looked at them as if they were dim-witted, for men of their age were daring to challenge him? To him, they didn't seem to make formidable opponents for a tree, much less himself.
Before him, many men, seemingly very elderly were gradually gathering behind the old man, and he saw youkai among the men in their humanoid and truest forms.
"I will give you one chance to stand down, and I shall spare you. If you do not take this opportunity, you may consider this your last breath ever to be taken." He warned calmly. He wasn't surprised at the men's stupidity as they charged for him.
The earth began to roar as the scenery changed. They were in a forest of some sort, and everything appeared dead as the men's near future. The annoying sound slowly began to fade as Sesshoumaru swiftly scanned his surroundings, taking in every inch.
As the men fell back into his view, he launched himslef high into the air as he noticed the foolish man jumping off his horse, charging at him with in-human speed.
'So, I have been misled. He is not human, yet neither is he youkai…'
Sesshoumaru extended his claws as he swooped down into the man and tore him apart. A cloud of dust erupted from were he'd just struck what he thought was his target.
The dust quickly disappeared as Sesshoumaru found himself facing a huge hole in the ground. He'd missed his mark.
Sesshoumaru smirked as he calculated just how fast the man was going.
He dodged a blow from another man wildly aiming to cut his head off with a sword that looked almost exactly like Banryuu, only a bit smaller, and he noticed it was sharpened at a strange angle. The man really didn't seem like much an opponent. His clothes were very raggedy and the condition he was in was abysmal.
Sesshoumaru's hand darkened to deep green as he lashed it out and struck the beast, melting every bone, muscle, and cell in his body. He soon realized that the beast was reconstructing itself, and seemed to be transforming hurriedly.
Dust, trees, lightning, all the men, and some youkai among their group where swirling in a blinding wind around the man. The whirlwind grew to tremendous heights until it dissipated, leaving a huge Jaguar youkai in its place.
"Ah, so you are youkai too I see. This does not matter, for your life will soon belong to me." The beast hissed.
As his words were spoken, he opened his mouth and a deep purple orb started to form. As the sphere grew in size, a sapphire blue lightning bolt surged from the sky and started frantically coiling around the purple object and began gleaming intensely.
A twister of the same color appeared in front of the jaguar and began spinning viciously out of control. Deep red lightning bolts started striking everywhere from the skies above. This was peculiar to Sesshoumaru since they smelled of blood…
He dodged the lightning and kept close view of the orb still forming from the youkai's mouth, continuously growing in size, while the gleam grew more and more intense.
'This lightning must be a distraction. I can smell where it is going to strike, although it is hard to avoid. He must be staling for enough time to create enough power to release that energy. I must slay him now.'
Sesshoumaru's hand started to glow a bright yellow as he prepared to release his dakotsu. The youkai saw this coming, and released a youkai from the azure colored lightning bolt on his forehead. The attempt was in vein as it was slain in a mere second. This however was enough to cancel his attack.
The jaguar saw Sesshoumaru begin to re-summon what he guessed was the same attack, and released loads of much stronger youkai in hopes of creating more powerful opponents than before.
'He cannot cancel my attack. I must destroy him; I am under order of my master. I shall slay him… he will suffer by my hands, and mine alone,' the beast thought. He smirked, as his death lightning attack grew more and more powerful with each passing second.
Sesshoumaru saw the jaguar reject nearly thirty youkai, which was strange because he was formed with barely ten youkai and a mouth-load of humans. 'Is this creature able to produce additional youkai inside himself?' He questioned.
Looking upon the newly formed group of youkai, Sesshoumaru noticed they were a combination of wolves, foxes, lions, tigers, bears (oh my!), and some youkai unknown to Sesshoumaru.
He knew he would be able to battle them better in his Inuyoukai form, but with the lightning still striking everywhere, he couldn't take a chance.
The wolf youkai struck first, unleashing an unseen attack. Sesshoumaru was thrown back into a nearby tree and his eyes began to glow red.
Looking back up at the wolf, he noticed something. 'They are too small to be regular wolf youkai, although they are much to fast to be wolf youkai alone.'
In actuality, a true wolf youkai should rival the size of Sesshoumaru in his truest form. This wolf youkai was about a quarter shorter, and its fur was emerald with burgundy tips. His fangs were extremely long and wide. The youkai almost looked saber-toothed.
Sesshoumaru growled deafeningly as the now un-dodgable lightning pierced his stomach, and the bear youkai ferociously pounced on him.
He saw the fox youkai's eyes gleaming orange, and guessed it was summoned by it. Through the corner of his eye, he caught sight of the jaguar youkai completely engulfed in the enormous orb.
Time stood still as to everyone's dismay, the orb was released.
The entire forest exploded in a blinding green flame as Sesshoumaru was thrown back onto a large boulder, and was instantly paralyzed from some magic that must've been used in the blast.
The earth violently roared out as flames plummeted from the sky to the grounds below, devouring each and everything in its path, revealing no mercy. The skies began to darken.
Sesshoumaru heard it first, and then he began to feel it. Rumbling. A huge rumbling sound began to fill his sensitive ears as the earth began to violently shake.
He looked around to see where it was coming from when he noticed it was coming from the ground.
Enormous ice crystal daggers began shooting from the ground, and going high into the sky and falling at light speed. He noticed the crystals were flaming and at least three times bigger by the time they hit the ground.
Blood erupted everywhere as one large crystal exploded from the ground beneath Sesshoumaru, shattering the rock that was holding him up, and tearing through his upper stomach. He cringed as the crystal increased in size as it came further and further out of the ground.
Sesshoumaru noticed there were more and more ice crystals exploding from the ground, but unlike the previous ones, they were just remaining there.
It took him a moment before he realized they were beginning to form a shape in the ground. He recognized it as a circle, only with huge holes in-between the crystals.
He looked up to see a dagger heading straight for him when it curved, and placed itself in one of the many holes the crystals provided. Upon gazing closer, he noticed that all the crystals in the sky were beginning to fill the holes in the circle.
After the crystals were in place, the lightning falling from the sky began to turn pink, as its target soon became the icy circle as well.
Another loud roar could be heard as the circle began to glow in pink flames. The heat was burning Sesshoumaru, but he showed no sign of weakness, or, he tried as best he could with the immense pain flooding his body.
The forest was engulfed in a black flame as the circle raised itself from the ground and began furiously spinning high in the sky. Sesshoumaru noticed that the crystal was darkening tremendously, and that all to familiar scent was clogging his nose. Blood started flying everywhere, and he noticed that everything it touched exploded.
He growled in pain as the heat became unbearable, and heavy poison spreading in the air painfully pierced his lungs.
In the heat of his torture, he suddenly paused as he felt a familiar feeling. He looked down at his sword to see it pulsating to the beat of his heart, which was beating fiercely. In seven pulses, Sesshoumaru was surrounded in a bluish-blackish light, and was painfully transported from what he hoped was somewhere away from this predicament.
To his dismay, when the light disintegrated, he found he was only transported out of the youkai's attack, behind it. This opened a new light for him as he noticed something he'd failed to notice before.
"Ah, yes! At long last, Lord Sesshoumaru has been defeated, just as his pathetic father had been before him! My master will be pleased with my…" The youkai screamed as he was now engulfed in a blue light and turned around only to see Sesshoumaru.
'How can this be? My death lightning attack should've destroyed him. In fact, my attack was destabilized greatly somehow.'
Sesshoumaru snarled as he watched the youkai become engulfed in a yellow blaze and de-transformed into the original youkai and mortals it had used to convert before.
"As I've stated earlier, consider this, your last breath," he smoothly announced as he quickly un-sheathed his Toukijin and slashed his sword- not toward the scattered group, but what he'd spotted earlier... a hole. He wouldn't have even caught sight of it if he hadn't been hit.
This meant only one thing: this wasn't real. This world, these beasts, they were... imaginary. The damage they caused was real, but the beasts that caused it were not.
The hole indicated that someone was watching and directing everything that happened on the field, which would explain why none of his attacks worked. He sighed. He didn't like foul play; it just simply wouldn't do, unless of course, he was behind it.
Sesshoumaru slashed through the hole, and the forest they were in slowly began to dissolve, leaving behind a bloodstained village... a real village.
He understood know.
He had been tricked. The blasts from his poison and swords and claws were real. They laid not a scratch on the bandits he'd been fighting, but they did manage destroy every form of life in the village. What he'd been in was most likely a dream turned real; the appearance was fake, but the world around it was real.
The blood of mortals, animals, youkai, and everything else soiled his clothes. His claws were drenched in it. Dirt rested upon his face and hair, his eyes deep red. He was covered in cuts and bruises.
The red in his eyes gradually faded as his next words were spoken.
"A diversion."
¸.·´¸.·´¨) ¸.·¨….. ¸.·´¸.·´¨) ¸.·¨
Harumi was thrown back into the wall as his amulet was engulfed in a blue blaze pulsating enormous amounts of energy. The jewel busted into a thousand pieces as he began to chuckle.
"This is not the end my friend, for you've created just enough time for me to get what I require. Do not underestimate my power, for the battle has yet to begin..."
¸.·´¸.·´¨) ¸.· End Flashback! ¸.·´¸.·´¨) ¸.·¨
Sesshoumaru stood staring at his claws, and looked up to the moon.
He'd decided earlier to take a walk to ease his mind, but seeing as the sun would rise in a few hours, he turned around, and started to walk back to his castle. This was going to be another long day.
¸.·´¸.·´¨) ¸.·¨….. ¸.·´¸.·´¨) ¸.·¨
Kagome opened her eyes as she began to awaken.
She sat up on her futon as she rubbed her eyes and turned to look at her alarm clock when she remembered what had happened. This had saddened her. She was still a bit scared at the thought of possibly never seeing her family again.
She looked out the window and guessed it was around two in the morning by how dark it was outside. She knew she had a long day ahead of her, and she'd figured she should get some more sleep since she guessed Kahori would wake her up at around sunrise.
She felt tired once again as her eyes began to feel like heavy bowling balls. She laid her head back down and allowed sleep to once again claim her body… for just a few more hours.
Kagome woke up later and looked out the window. She sighed as she saw the sun rising higher and higher into the sky, and closed her eyes again.
She began to feel another presence in the room with her, and opened her eyes and nearly screamed when she saw a figure hovering over her, reaching their hand out to her. Kagome quieted down as she saw it was only Kahori.
Kahori snapped her hand back when she saw Kagome awaken and ready to scream. "Forgive me Kagome; I was merely trying to get you to wake up."
"Ayume, remember?"
Kahori nodded. "Hai, that's right. Forgive me, Ayume." Kagome, or Ayume rather, noticed she put extra emphasis on her name.
"Well, I am glad you're awake. We must hurry, we have two hours to get you ready," Kahori warned.
"Oh, that should be plenty of time!"
"Not necessarily. Things always take longer than intended."
Ayume made an 'O' with her mouth as she stood up and walked over to Kahori. "So, what do we do first?"
Kahori walked over to the closet. "First, you need to bathe." She laughed as her friend scrunched her face at the words she'd just heard.
Ayume walked over to the closet doors soon after, and opened them. Kahori reached in the far right and grabbed a woman's battle garb and armor, and told her friend to follow her to the bathing room, where they bathed hurriedly.
¸.·´¸.·´¨) ¸.·¨….. ¸.·´¸.·´¨) ¸.·¨
Ayume walked into the dojo and saw Sesshoumaru in a defensive stance carrying his katana with practiced ease. She wondered how he would train her; she knew she wasn't the worlds most coordinated person.
Although he didn't look at her, she knew he felt her presence. He had to. From her understanding, he was a very powerful youkai. Watching him swing his sword with such grace and precision made her feel weak, and hopeless. She knew she'd never be as good, or even remotely close as he. But then again, she could be half as good at him, and still be distinguished as 'great.'
"Miko," she heard him say. She guessed he was talking to her, seeing as she was a miko, or so she was told.
Ayume winced as he turned to her, with a look of slight disappointment, and annoyance. "Your power is weaker than before, which I find that particularly interesting, seeing how weak you were 'before.'"
Ayume broke away from his intense glare as he spoke. She felt as weak as he was claiming she was. But that was physically only. She thought of herself as extremely bold, almost to the point of sheer craziness. She was perfectly normal, as normal as a girl in her circumstance could be. Then again, who could she compare herself to? She knew of no other who had a life like hers.
Sesshoumaru looked at her, and then looked to her left. When he noticed her vision was focused on the same thing as his, he spoke. "Take that sword."
Ayume complied, walking over to the sword. She never thought something so dangerous could look so nice. Ok, so she didn't think 'nice' was the right word to describe a sword, but, it looked, innocent just sitting there. Then again, maybe she was crazy.
She reached down to pick up the sword, frowning as she realized it was a lot heavier than she'd expected. But then again, how light had she expected a yard of solid metal to be? Struggling, she managed to lift the sword into what she knew was a defensive position.
She had no official training, but she knew some things, some techniques. Well, she'd seen them on television, but she saw it enough to know them. She began to feel power with this object, this weapon she held in her hands.
Sesshoumaru stared at her as she raised her sword, and placed her body into a some-what sloppy defensive stance. At least he wouldn't have to show her the basics, right? He pondered where to begin with this mortal. He'd seen her fight, and although she was good, she was nothing to talk about. Not for him to talk, or even care about.
Ayume noticed the some-what distant look plastered on his face when her world was turned around. Her sword she'd held moments before was flying across the room, and so was she apparently. Her sword had been knocked out of her hands by him.
Upon landing on the ground, she quickly grabbed her sword, and searched the room for Sesshoumaru. He was standing in the same place, although he was in a defensive stance. Was he expecting her to come at him? She slowly stood up.
"Hold your sword firmly," She heard him say as he rushed for her again. With a burst of speed she couldn't have possibly possessed, her sword was to her side, ready. As Sesshoumaru prepared another attack, she took a swing, aiming –and hitting- Sesshoumaru's sword, swinging it back a little.
Sesshoumaru's hands then glowed a golden color as he flew into the air and produced what she thought was a whip. It looked familiar, but where had she seen it before?
Instantly, she raised her sword to fight of the whip approaching her direction, but realized she was too slow as her sword was yanked behind her, and she was knocked off her feet yet again.
"Be more alert," She heard him say. She wondered if he could possibly be any blunter. It wasn't necessarily helping, and she wished he would explain a bit more. But, she guessed he wasn't the type to explain himself much.
That was the last thing she remembered as her vision grew dark, and her consciousness left her.
Sesshoumaru was alert when he noticed her scent was different, and her eyes were… glowing? Yes, they were, green, and were glowing red. He was bemused when he heard laughter from her.
"Sesshoumaru, are you actually going easy on a human?" Ayume smirked when she saw him land, and stared at him. She swore she saw confusion flicker across his eyes, but just for a moment.
"Who are you?" Sesshoumaru asked… bluntly of course. Ayume guessed he wasn't the one to play around, so she thought she'd play instead.
"Who am I? You don't remember me? After all we… haven't been through? Hmnn, I suppose we never met up close before. My mistake."
Sesshoumaru just stared at her.
"You already know who I am, I just happened to have a brand-new disguise. Do you like it? …No? Well, I thought it was pretty. I figured I'd just, borrow the miko's body for now…."
Sesshoumaru recognized that voice from somewhere, although he couldn't place when or where he'd heard it. The voice was deep, annoying, slightly raspy, mockingly playful, and most importantly: it was male.
"I wanted to play a game with you, to kind of… test your strength, intelligence, and patience. The rules are simple: don't die. We can't have you doing so quite yet."
Sesshoumaru watched as the sword in the miko's hands transformed into a huge sword, and a sapphire lightning bold began to form around it.
"That pitiful youkai failed, but I will not," the voice choked out as Ayume began crazily swinging the sword in a circle above her head, creating an electrifying blue cloud.
Sesshoumaru then saw her swing the sword in his direction, along with the cloud. He could smell poison in the air, as she inwardly sighed; annoyed at the fact that everyone was trying to piss him off today.
As the cloud rushed for him, he was about to sore into the air when a lighting bolt surged from the ceiling, missing him by an inch. He looked up and noticed another cloud, this one blood red, along with the familiar lightning bolts wildly descending from it.
Sesshoumaru quickly flew above the intoxicating azure-colored clouds of smoke, and proceeded to ease down toward Ayume as he dodged the bloodstained lightning.
As he fully intended to cease the attack Ayume just unleashed, she anticipated his plan and unleashed the harishinatsu attack. Thundering blades of solid ice came hurdling towards him at amazing speeds as he flew up to escape the attack.
Too late…
One particularly large blade of ice pierced his left leg, and released deadly amounts of poison into his bloodstream. The thing that didn't make sense was that the ice blade was hotter then fire, and he could neither smell nor see flames anywhere, unlike his 'encounter' with the 'icy blades of fire' he had earlier.
Neither the poison nor pain affected him, as he was used to pain. This would be considered light compared to many other attacks he'd caught himself in-between. He redeemed this pointless to worry about as the acid in his blood broke down the poison into nothing, but he still remained pinned to the wall.
Ayume took the opportunity to use the 'swords' Tsumi-Shinishi attack on him. She smirked as she pointed the sword towards Sesshoumaru and edged closer, and close.
"You're through..." The deep voice said in a dangerous tone as she sliced through the air in front of him.
"TSUMI!" The voice as the sword transformed into a very long, sharp sword with metal thorns. It looked a lot like a metal vine. She noticed Sesshoumaru wasn't fazed much by this.
Sesshoumaru watched the sword as it altered, trying to figure out how it had done so. He had the sword made, and was sure of its powers, unless this 'force' had more abilities than accounted for.
"THIS IS THE END!" The voice crazily screamed. "SHINISHI!"
Sesshoumaru smirked as the sword created black lightning around the surface as a poisoned trail of blood started frantically coiling around the cord. He noticed the force of the lightning was pulling the venomous clouds of smoke released from the first attack toward them.
Ayume started crazily swinging the vine around her head for a few moments until blood was leaking everywhere. She then swung the vine toward Sesshoumaru as the gaseous azure-colored clouds rushed for him.
"He's through. There's no way he could've escaped…"
Her eyes widened in surprise as a transparent blue force harshly plunged her back. She brutally hit the wall on the opposite side of the room as clouds of dust arose from the floor below.
Ayume hacked and coughed until the clouds slowly dissipated. She horridly noticed Sesshoumaru wasn't pinned to the wall anymore, but racing toward her with incredible speed. She observed that he had a sword drawn, and she guessed he was going to kill her at that very moment.
'This can't be. How did he escape? I won't make it in time… He'll kill me.'
Sesshoumaru raced for Ayume and swung his sword at her head as she ducked with surprising speed for a human.. He abruptly cornered her as he smirked, cutting across the air in front of her as blue youki escaped from her body. He then left and stood in the center of the room.
Ayume screamed as the essence left her body, and she fainted for a brief moment.
The walls began to violently vibrate as thunderous laughter cut through the dojo.
"Lord Sesshoumaru. Do not think you have won. With every distraction like thus, I get exactly what I need. Maybe, in time, you shall discover what I have taken. From my understanding, it is very dear to you…" The voice echoed into the emptiness.
As it disappeared, the room was engulfed in a brilliant pink light. As soon as it faded, Sesshoumaru noticed the dojo was cleaned perfectly. The midnight blue roof was no longer falling, the eastern wall was no longer blown out, the blood-stains on the floor were no longer there, and the hole in the northern wall where the heated crystal bound his leg to the wall was also gone. The only trace of the fight that could physically be found was the blood on Sesshoumaru's leg, and the blood on Ayume's wrists and stomach.
When she came to, around seven minutes later, she looked around surprised at the scenery and wondered if what she just thought happened actually didn't. She felt a sharp pain in her stomach and gazed upon it. She gasped as she saw her outfit soaked in her blood from her arms to her legs.
Gazing closer, she noticed six very appalling, extremely deep gashes on her lower stomach. When she positioned her hands in front of it, she discovered that her arms, wrists, and hands also bared treacherous wounds.
She wasn't sure if she could stomach all of this, literally.
Ayume searched around the terribly large room for Sesshoumaru and spotted him in the center of the room. He was staring at the ceiling, fangs partially bared. She noticed he softened his gaze a bit, and saw him direct his vision toward her. She noticed a little bit of anger in his eyes, but she guessed it wasn't aimed at her.
Sesshoumaru turned his head so he was no longer facing her. She wasn't sure, but she thought she heard a faint growl.
"He is gone." He stated plainly. Since he hadn't talked to her since she arrived, Ayume guessed he wasn't talking to her then.
"Gomen." She said as she began to sob. Sesshoumaru turned to face her, although she noticed he wasn't directly paying attention to her.
"I have to tell you something. I'm not entirely sure what happened here, because I wasn't exactly present when it transpired."
She looked at Sesshoumaru, and sighed when she noticed his attention was not directed toward her.
"Let me explain. Somehow, I... my spirit was transported to a different place, although I guess my body remained here. Some man, or youkai rather, I believe his name was Lord Harumi, or something close immediately started to fight me, or at least he tried. Somehow, I put up a barrier he couldn't penetrate. Well, around three minutes later, he managed to disengage the barrier, and started fighting with his sword…"
Sesshoumaru had her attention by now. He was waiting for an explanation other than what he already knew.
"I remember before I re-awoke here, he kept repeating, 'forty-two days, forty-two days. I shall have my ultimate revenge!' over and over. That's when I woke-up here..."
Sesshoumaru looked a wee bit confused, or at least that's what she thought. She noticed it was a bit hard to read his emotions, so she concluded that he kept to himself a lot. She wondered what Lord Harumi had meant, and if the message was actually for Lord Sesshoumaru.
'What's going on?'
Last Chapter: Chapter Seven: Lord Harumi's True Plans: Revealed
Next Chapter: The Past: An Unfortunate Memory
Ok, another nice chapter, ne? I hope so. I know this chapter is written a bit differently from the others, but I am sort-of re-doing my first few chapters to make them flow better. I was reading them, and I am utterly disappointed with them, to say the least –don't respond to that-. Anyway, I tried to put a little action in there for you, I know it wasn't much, but I didn't want to wait until the final fighting scene for you guys to get any action. OKKKK, so you got quite a bit of action last chapter, buuuttttt, you know that's not what I'm talking about here smirk
Hey, you guess… can you do me a favor and review for me? Although I am happy for those of you who already have, but I know a lot of you haven't been, not that you have to or anything. A –somewhat- new feature added lets authors see how many people are reading your stories, and I have over 500hits, and 56 reviews. I want some feedback, so can I have some please?
-Back to story- Hey, we're getting somewhere, yay! Next chapter will be nice I think, because I decided on something which will help end this story a bit faster (don't worry, if you liked it before, you know I wouldn't steer you wrong now, right?). As for how this story ends, I think you'll like it, bbuuttt, keep chapter five's contents in mind, you'll find out why soon –well, maybe not SOON- enough.
Well, enough endless rambling. (I'll place the joke as soon as I can find it...I don't remember where I found it. Actually, my friend Pyre told me!)