The quotes are taken from Hitoto Yoh's song "hanamizuki." I'm sure you can find a translation somewhere, but to put an English subtitle here would ruin its poetry. It's a beautiful song :-)

One-sided romance.

Review if you like. No flames, please.

AI NO KANSHOKU
Renji & Rukia

natsu wa atsusugite
boku kara kimochi wa omosugite
issho ni wataru ni wa kitto fune ga shizunjau
douzo yukinasai
osaki ni yukinasai

That time we were training in the same grounds, I must've looked at the orange-haired bastard a million times. Each time I was wondering, when I look at him, and when Rukia looks at him, are we seeing the same things?

I see a straight back, broad shoulders, orange hair, his zanpakutou, his determination. Yeah, his determination is as visible as anything physical on his body, and it was just as tangible every time I stood next to him.

Bastard. Always trying to show me up. Every time I would take a break, he'd still be practicing, practicing, practicing. One-track minded. Idiot. Asshole. Orange-haired shinigami idiot who doesn't know the first thing about Soul Society.

Okay, so he freed Rukia in the seconds before her execution, I'll give him that. And he stayed behind to fight one-on-one with Kuchiki Byakuya, which might be suicide in itself…but I don't think so. He's got guts, that Kurosaki Ichigo. And what am I doing?

Fleeing. Running away with the whole point of this treachery.

She's so small in my arms it was even a wonder that we're near the same age, given as to how my entire hand can easily swallow her slim shoulder. And this is one of those rare moments where she needs a pep talk, and there's no one around to give it but me.

I'm bad at these things. Really. But she takes my bluntness as the honest truth.

In fact, she's shaking now, hiding her face from me. I can't look at her. The Kuchiki Rukia I know never gives in to her fears, to her excessive emotion – but I suppose that she's always been so silent and strong that she never allowed herself the time to properly take care of her mask. It's cracked and broken, discarded, by one shinigami's hand.

Hmph. It's too bad that even with all her smarts, Rukia's never gonna figure out anyone's feelings towards her. She'll never figure out why I've chosen to take part in this once-called "pathetic" rescue attempt. And if by some miracle she does, all I'll have to do is deny it, and that will be the end of that. End of story.

"Renji?"

"Yeah?"

"Do you think…that Ichigo will be all right?"

"You gotta believe in him, Rukia. He's stronger now than he was before…he's gonna make it. He trained super hard, plus he has Shihouin Yoruichi on his side. He's got a lot going for him."

She smiled. "He can do bankai, too."

Now that was a surprise. "How do you know?"

"I just know."

That was probably the main reason I was not all that surprised when, later, when we had made it to safe ground and even after Aizen was defeated, I'd learned that Kuchiki Byakuya had been defeated by Kurosaki Ichigo. I'd known it from the start.

Sometimes I don't know whether I want to strangle Kurosaki Ichigo or if I want to accept him into the circle of Soul Society. He's done a lot of shit in the short time he's known about shinigami, and that's saying something. Not only did he defy every goddamn law known to shinigami, he also broke into Soul Society and gave this place the most action we've seen in over fifty years. And he saved Rukia.

My best friend, Kuchiki Rukia. The person that I care the most about. It's too bad that I already know, though…know that all the time Rukia spent with Ichigo led up to a realization, led up to a single point where he would be willing to give anything to save her from death and for her to cry at just seeing him again.

I know, later, if she were well and Ichigo and I were standing side by side, it's not to me she'd run – not to her best friend, the one who survived all those years with her – no, it would be to the reckless, crazy-power, orange-haired shinigami. He's the one Rukia would wrap her arms around, would cry into, would spend a sleepless night shaking in his embrace. Not me. Kurosaki Ichigo.

I felt like killing him when I realized it, the first time.

Why did Rukia have to fall in love with him? Why couldn't she have fallen in love with me? Is there really such a difference between us? I know her better, I've known her longer, and I can actually make her laugh, instead of cry…

But it's something that you just can't help. Maybe somewhere, someone's laughing their ass off at me and how this one Kurosaki Ichigo came in and swept away two of the things closest to me: my goal of defeating Kuchiki Byakuya, and Kuchiki Rukia. Because even though Ichigo threw her to me and she's as physical in my hands as anything, her mind is a million miles away.

Rukia's always with Ichigo. At one point I would have resented it. At one point it would have stabbed my heart.

It still stabs my heart, but there's nothing I can do except run. Keep her safe for Ichigo.

Run.

So that Ichigo can return to her, and so she can smile.

kimi to suki na hito ga hyakunen tsuzukimasu you ni…

owari