Disclaimer: Once again, I own nothing. Not a car, not a house, and certainly not the genius that is Suikoden. This is for SI, and contains some minor spoilers if you haven't gotten a few hours into the game…I'm not sure I like how it turned out, so read and review, as always.
This is at the request of Milia Alexandros
The Color of my Curse
I am going to be in so much trouble when I get home.
Defying the Commander, running off to help the rebels, fighting imperial armies, establishing a headquarters and building my own army…
I think "trouble" might be putting it mildly.
In the grander scheme of things, though, it hardly seems to matter.
It's not like I left home by choice, now is it? Windy was after Ted's Rune, so we had to run. Still, it wasn't easy. Even harder was leaving Ted, my best friend, behind.
That seems to be my curse, now. Cursed Rune, he called it. I can understand why. Either I leave my friends and family behind, or they leave me behind.
I am going to be alone forever, aren't I?
I'm too young to be saying "forever." I think I might be too young to grasp the concept, yet. Maybe in a few hundred years, after watching all my old friends die and all my dreams fade away…maybe then I'll be ready to understand "forever."
Then again, I could die in this war. That scares me. Somehow, I became a leader—nay, the figurehead, which is worse—for a cause that wasn't mine. I'm not entirely certain yet whether I actually believe it's a Cause worth dying for, or whether I'm just fighting because it's what I'm expected to do.
No, I can't think that way. I have a reason to fight. I do. For Ted, for the Emperor, for all the people I never met who have suffered because of Windy…it is for them that I fight. Does it really matter so much if my reasons are the same as those who follow me, so long as we have the same goal?
I will bring Windy down. Whatever it takes. Overthrowing the Empire, standing up to my father, gambling for the money to support an army…I do it. Because neither of us can rest until one of us is defeated. This began with the Soul Eater, and the rune will end it. Somehow.