Ok I so i finally got around to adding chapter 8. I originally planned on having more drama in this chapterbut once I got writting this scene took up quite a bit of time so if you love romantic fluff this is the chapter for you.Intense stuff next chappie.
Enjoy.
Chapter 8-Tortured Thoughts
Kagome flopped down on her bed. Today had been torture, and heaven all at the same time. If that was at all possible. Doing the poetry presentation hadn't been at all as bad as she had envisioned, public speaking was never the bloody, gory episode she always thought it would be, but she wasn't about to admit that to anyone, it still scared her senseless. Then there was the roller-coaster of emotions in art class. Her brain had been screaming things at her all day. Did he really try to do what she thought he tried to do?
He likes me!
No…he hates me…
Doesn't he?
Of course he doesn't hate me, we're friends now.
Maybe more?
"Agh!" Kagome pulled a pillow over her head trying to block out the thoughts and images tumbling through her head like they were on the spin-cycle.
She turned over and stared at the ceiling trying desperately to pull some other thought from the fog in the back of her mind. Anything, something Sango said in the car the other morning, the face of some random relation from years passed, anything but these clamorous, confusing thoughts. But it was no use. They possessed her. It was as if they were all she had ever known, and seemed they would be all she ever knew. She could not banish them. Every time she began to drag her mind somewhere else they were there.
"I need an exorcist." She managed to conjure an image of Linda Blaire, but the pale, scarred face of the little girl was soon replaced by the smooth features of a certain silver-haired boy.
She snatched up the remote to her CD player moodily. She punched the play and threw herself back down on the bed.
Faintest snow keep falling.
Hands around your waste.
Nameless, standing cold, standing cold,
Like a breath, like a breath.
Take in restraint like a breath.
My lungs are so numb from holding back.
"Great." She muttered when the song called Crush came blaring through the speakers.
Walk close to the fence.
Feel it hit your clothes.
Turn and smile nice.
Smile say goodnight.
Say goodnight in a breath, in a breath.
Simple discourse breaks you clean
Simple discourse breaks you clean in half.
She gave into the visions of Inuyasha, his voice and her own screaming in her head. She let the chaos and turmoil wash over her like the tide.
Regret.
Do try it once and then you know.
Your move.
Settle for nothing less again…again…
She was in her trance when the phone rang. She barely realized what it was with all the noise thundering around in her skull. It rang almost four times before her eyes snapped open and the piercing, shrill sound registered.
"Hello?"
"Is Kagome there?"
"It's me." Hadn't this just happened, she wondered with the dazed feeling that she might be dreaming?
"What are you up to?"
"Listening to music." She noticed the sound of his voice speaking to her had calmed the demons within her.
"Want to go for a walk? I thought it might be nice to take advantage of the nice weather."
"That sounds great." She said trying to sound relaxed.
"I'll be over in ten minutes then."
"Ok."
"I'm not going to get you in trouble with your mom am I?"
"No, she's not home. And if she gets home before I do I can handle it."
"You can handle it?" He said in disbelief.
"Don't be an ass. She won't be drunk yet, she's at work until at least five, and she's barely ever been home before six."
"Ok." There was a brief pause before he finally answered and Kagome held her breath hoping he wouldn't change his mind. "I'll be over in a few."
"Bye." Kagome could breathe again and sighed happily as he hung up the phone.
It was a shock for someone to arrive on time. Sango was always late, Kagome had gotten into a habit of telling her they needed to leave well before they actually had to so they would be on time. But of course there he was. That was Inuyasha after all, always surprising her.
"You know," she said in a bright voice as she slid into the front seat of his car, "I never noticed you had such a nice car."
"Thank you."
"You're welcome you spoiled brat." Kagome said snuggling into the leather seat and buckling her seatbelt.
"Excuse me?" He tried to sound offended.
"You heard me." Kagome smiled like a child as they coasted smoothly down the street.
Inuyasha didn't turn to look at her, he kept his eyes on the road ahead. But he didn't need to be facing her for Kagome to see the slight smile grace his lips.
"Is this weird?" Inuyasha asked her as he pulled away from a stop sign. "Us hanging out together, I mean."
"I don't think it is. I like it." Kagome said, feeling brave.
"Me too."
Inuyasha pulled the car off the side of the road like they did the other night and they both stepped out into the fresh air. The rich golden light of mid afternoon shown down on them and time felt as if it moved slower than it ever had. Minutes crawled by in the blissful glow of a lazy, slowly setting sun.
"We have about an hour and a half before your mom gets back to the house. Think you can manage that long?"
"It's only an hour or so Inuyasha, I don't think I'll die. Who do you think I am exactly?"
"I was just checking." He sounded slightly sullen too be reprimanded when he was only trying to be polite.
Kagome laughed at the despondent expression on her companions face and playfully swatted at his shoulder. Her lightheartedness worked and he stopped pouting.
"So, which way nature boy?" Kagome turned in a circle staring at the tree-lined sky, arms open in a sweeping, open gesture.
When she stopped again, her head tilted slightly as she looked at her companion, she wore a lopsided smile. He stared at her blankly for a minute longer, his thoughts lost, his concentration drifting. He searched her warm brown eyes, for what he wasn't sure. Then black butterfly wings, sweeping lashes fluttered across his being. She blinked, the spell was gone.
"This way." He jerked his head to the right.
He stood watching her, body titled toward the path he had indicated, waiting for her to draw up next to him. Shoulder to shoulder they started through the trees. Deep golden light filtering through the canopy of leaves, the air only starting to chill, a subtle warning of what was to come. For minutes that seemed to stretch into a comfortable eternity the only sound was the soft thuds of their feet on the hard packed earth that wound its way through the park. Torn between not wanting to shatter this peace, this almost magic silence, and the ever-growing urge to try and crack the shell of the great mystery that was Inuyasha.
"It's hard to believe we're almost done isn't it?"
"Done?"
"With High School and everything." Kagome kicked a pebble off into the bushes while she waited for Inuyasha's response.
"I guess." Talkative as usual.
"So…what do you want to do?"
"I don't know." He replied coolly, watching her.
"You don't know? I thought everybody knew."
"Do you know?"
"Hah. No."
"But I thought everybody knew." Inuyasha said, teasing.
"I guess I thought I was the only one."
"Nah. There're a lot of people who aren't sure."
"Like you."
"Like me." He confirmed.
"Do you have any idea? I mean college, work? Anything?" Kagome watched his face but his expression didn't really stray from indifference.
"Not really. My brother wants me to work for his company. It was my dad's originally; I guess that's only nice thing he ever did for us. But…I don't know."
"Isn't there anything you love, something that you could turn into a life. I mean, when you picture yourself years from now, what are you doing? What would make you happy?"
"Painting I guess." Inuyasha said calmly.
"So go to an art college. Spend a few years for you, then work for your brother if you want."
"Sesshoumaru says that business school would be more appropriate."
"It's your life. You should do what you want to do."
"Well what about you?" He said smiling, trying to move the conversation away from him. "Where do you see yourself?"
"Free." Kagome answered simply, staring ahead.
"That's it?"
"That's about as far as I go. It's the one thing I really need." Kagome wasn't telling the entire truth, but she wasn't about to give up her deepest secrets at the drop of a hat.
"You'll get there." He said and leaned a little closer, trying to get a good look at her face. "But you're trying to tell me you never picture yourself after you get away, where you get away too?"
"Where would I go? I don't have money to go to school. I don't do well enough in school to get a scholarship."
"We'll think of something." He smiled, and Kagome couldn't help smile back.
"So you were listening to music when I called. What kind of music do you listen to?"
They walked, and Kagome paid little attention to where they went. She only thought of what was said, how close her arm was to Inuyasha's. She thought only of how she felt when he laughed, and how easily laughter came to her when he was around. She didn't have any idea how much time had passed, only the vague awareness that the light was dimming and they sky above them was growing darker. When Inuyasha suddenly stopped Kagome looked around her, surprised. They were back to where they had started. Looking out across the creek, the sun setting finally. The last rays of light spilling out of the horizon in a blaze of blood red, the sky went from a deep indigo to peach, ribbons of orange and pink clouds framed by the gently swaying trees.
It's so romantic.
Kagome blushed as those words crossed her mind. The wind whipped her hair in all directions and she reached up to brush a stray strand from her vision.
"It's beautiful isn't it?" Inuyasha sighed and sat down among the roots of the familiar tree. "What I wouldn't give for some paints right now."
Kagome felt at a loss. She couldn't drag her eyes away from Inuyasha as he stared longingly at the horizon. He turned to Kagome and grinned his lopsided smile.
"Come here and watch this." He reached up and took her wrist firmly, but gently in his hand and pulled her down next to him. "For an artist you don't pay much attention to nature do you?"
"Yes I do!" Kagome said, affronted by the playful condemnation in his voice.
"Well you didn't seam to be paying much attention to the sunset, that's all. Staring at something else and all…" His voice trailed off as he continued to watch the sun set in the distance, a ghost of a smile still lingering.
"Besides, I'm not an artist, not really."
"What do you mean? Of course you're an artist." Kagome was surprised to find that Inuyasha sounded almost insulted at her statement.
"I like art. But I don't think I'm really an artist, I'm not very good, I don't have anything special, and I don't know if I could ever make it my life."
"You like it. That's all that matters. And you do have talent, you do have something special. Whether or not you make it your life has nothing to do with it." He spoke with the fervor of someone attempting to convert another.
"But I-"
"Shh. Just watch." He smiled and pointed to the horizon.
Kagome relented. Watching the sun almost completely disappear before she spoke again.
"'Shh,' not 'shup up wench?' I think you're going soft."
"Maybe a little."
"Why is that tough guy?"
"Don't know."
Neither one looked away from the sunset. Sitting shoulder to shoulder she could faintly feel the heat from his body. She could hear him breathing and for some reason it was making her heart beat faster. She prayed feverishly that he couldn't hear it.
Kagome took a glance at Inuyasha and her poor frantic heart ached. The setting sun bathed him in a brilliant light. His silver hair caught the rich oranges and reds and set it afire. His amber eyes positively glowed, the lines of his profile clearly defined.
How did I let myself get this way? How did I let this get so far? I don't have a chance.
Inuyasha could feel her staring, could feel those brown eyes on his face. It was a habit of hers that he was growing quite fond of. Not that he would admit that to anyone. He could not seem to bring himself to turn and look at her though. He could throw himself into fights; speak in front of any number of people, unlike her; but when it came to what he wanted to do now he had no courage.
He steeled himself, took a deep breath and turned. He could not allow himself to be lost in those eyes, those deep brown eyes, again. He had to do this, he would go crazy if he did not do this. He leaned in. To his surprise she haltingly did so as well. Before anything could interrupt them this time he kissed her. It was nothing earth shattering; a small, innocent kiss. But it was perfect.
Inuyasha pulled away and looked into her face, desperately trying to read her expression. She was similarly staring at him. She seemed terrified, he was surprised to see. Terrified that she had misread him, that he would pull away? Terrified that he would try again? Terrified that he wouldn't? He reached out, moving without really thinking. He brushed more of her hair from her face, the wind blowing it so that it resting on bridge of her nose, in front of her eye. He fingers lightly brushed her skin, trailing down her cheek, under her chin. His heart practically leaped out of his chest when she laid her own tiny hand over his. She smiled at him timidly, and he used his free arm to wrap around her shoulder and pull her toward him. She let go of his other hand so that he could fold her into his strong embrace and rested her head against his chest. He felt one of her delicate hands lay itself on his torso, the other laying gently on his shoulder blade. He sighed contently and buried his face in her hair.
They sat like that, her listening to the beating of his heart, Inuasha breathing in the faint scent of lilac in her hair. The sun sank below the bank and still they sat there, watching the stars slowly blink and fill the night sky.
There's eight, and I'm in the middle of nine as we speak. Did everyone like the Jimmy? Lol, ok I promise I'll branch out to another band next time. Also if you're a fan of the book/movie White Oleanderyou might have noticed the movie-inspired part in the story above. wink I'm glad I had time to work on this story. I've been so busy recently but I have some time, especially these next few weeks. I'm even planning on starting another Inu fic this week. I'm thinking I'll have chapter 1 up tomorrow, I'm calling it Sinner. ;) So look for it and let me know what you think. 3