Chapter 9-Tortured Thoughts
The sound of the alarm on Inuyasha's watch going off broke the silence. He glanced down at its glowing face and felt his spirits fall. Of course it was all too good to be true.
"Time to go huh?" Kagome said, managing a meek smile.
"Yeah." Was all Inuyasha could manage to say.
The car ride had passed in strange silence, not truly awkward because neither of them regretted what had happened. Just quiet because neither really had anything to say. Actions speak louder than words, Kagome decided when he smiled at her and tenderly tucked a strand of her hair behind her ear at the stop sign.
When they arrived at Kagome's house her mother's car was in the driveway.
Guess she decided to drink at home tonight.
"Maybe I should just take you over to Sango's." Inuyasha suddenly seemed nervous.
"No. It's ok. She just got back from work, she can't be drunk yet."
"I'm still going to wait. Wave out the window of your room. If I don't see you in two minutes I'm coming in, ok?"
"My hero."
"I'm serious." He said putting a hand on her shoulder and searching her face.
"I know. I'll be fine, I swear." She said and quickly slid out of the car.
To prove her courage she walked calmly up the path and stepping confidently into the living room without hesitation. The lights were on, and everything was in order. Just as she had left it. It looked like a normal living room. The kitchen light was on, shining through the doorway on the far side of the room. She could see her mother's purse on the table. She quietly walked across the soft carpet and up the stairs to her room. She shut the door behind her.
Not a single problem. With a satisfied grin she leaned out her window. Somewhere downstairs she heard a soft thud, her mother must have dropped something in the kitchen.
"All clear Prince Charming."
"Ok. Take care of yourself."
"Don't forget to call me."
"Never." And with that she shut the window and started downstairs to get herself some dinner before her mother started to hit the bottle.
At the bottom of the stairs she turned and stepped into the kitchen, outside she heard Inuyasha's car drive off. The kitchen was an uncomfortably small space. It only took a few quick strides to get anywhere in the tiny cube of a room. It was so small that you noticed every eye-level first. That was why she didn't notice the person sprawled out at her feet until she almost tripped over it.
Her mother was lying face down on the ugly green tiles, her hair covering her face, her limbs splayed in strange positions from her fall. She didn't even move when Kagome kicked her side.
"Isn't it a little early to be this trashed?" She asked as she stepped over her to get to the fridge.
Kagome opened a Sobe and took a deep gulp as she scanned the contents of the fridge. She tossed some leftovers onto the counter and shut the door.
"Skipped out early to get wasted huh? Just great mom." She muttered trying to make her way around the crapped kitchen to make her meal; she was even contemplating dragging her mother's unconscious form into the living room to make her work easier.
Then something orange caught her eye. She took a step to her right, her heart suddenly hammering frantically in her chest. What was that clutched in her mother's hand?
Even from where she stood she could see the label. Cleaning fluid. Had she drank cleaning fluid? Christ, would that woman drink anything? Kagome stood deathly still, as still as her mother. There was nothing. She was blank, her mind was empty. She couldn't seam to get herself to move, her body went limp. The bottle slipped from her hand and shattered on the floor and it all hit her like a comet. A million thoughts screamed for attention all at the same time.
She threw herself to the ground next to her mother. Her hand came down hard on a piece of glass. She felt other shards embed themselves in her knees . Kagome screamed. A shrill agony-filled scream. A large razor-sharp shard was imbedded deep in her palm. Crimson blood was beginning to seep out of the wound, filling her hand like a makeshift bowl, a small trickle of the warm, bitter sliding down her arm.
Call 911!
Kagome looked past her hand to her mother laying on the cold floor. She saw the blood oozing from her lip in her bedroom mirror. She saw the pallor of her mother's skin. She saw the gash on her hip from where she'd landed on the glass coffee-table. She saw the blue color of her mother's lips. She saw the bruises that had dotted her flesh for as long as she could remember. She heard the strained and ragged breathing that barely escaped her ravaged body, and heard her hateful words, her own pained screams. Why did this woman deserve to live?
She deserves to die.
The small voice somewhere in the dark corners of her mind cried. Kagome did not move. She deserved to die, like Souta had. She would wait, wait until her heart stopped for sure, then she would call. Then it would be too late.
NO!
"No! I'm not like you! I'm not like you, do you hear me?" She screamed irrationally.
"I'm not a monster…" She whimpered as tears began to spill down her cheeks. Cradling her injured hand to her body she pulled herself off the ground and snatched up the phone.
"I'm home." Inuyasha shouted as he dropped his keys on the table by the door.
Somewhere upstairs his brother's voice drifted down. A faint 'ok.' Inuyasha wondered to the kitchen and grabbed soda. He leaped up the stairs to his room, taking them two at a time.
He pushed the door open and flicked on the lights. Whistling happily as he laid the soda on his bedside table and flopped down. He turned on the TV and grabbed his sketchpad. He wasn't sure how much time passed as he alternated watching and drawing.
The phone rang, startling him his pencil jumped. He looked at the dark line across the picture, dismayed, before he answered.
"Hello?" He could hardly keep the growl out of his voice.
"Inuyasha?" Kagome's voice sounded weak, something in it made him anxious.
"Kagome? What's wrong?" His anxiety growing.
"I'm sorry, I just…I didn't know who else to call."
"It's ok, really. What happened Kagome?"
"It's my mom…I…"
"What did she do to you! Where are you!" Inuyasha was panicking now.
"I'm at the hospital." He could tell she was crying now.
"That bitch! I'll-"
"No! It's not what you think." Her voice cracked and she tried desperately to hold back a sob. "She…she's dead."
Inuyasha couldn't think of anything to say. He couldn't say he was sorry, because that would be a lie. But he had to say something.
"I'm coming." He said after thinking things through. "And I'm calling Sango."
"But-"
"Or you should. It's over Kagome. She loves you and deserves to know. Maybe she can help."
"I'll call." Her voice sounded weaker, if that were possible.
"I'm leaving right now."
Inuyasha threw on a sweatshirt and darted out of his room. He saw the light on in Sesshomaru's office and paused. Inuyasha and his brother didn't exactly agree all of the time, and they certainly didn't share much with each other, but maybe it was time to tell an adult. Kagome was going to need all the help she could get with a future so unclear.
Inuyasha paused at the door, slightly cracked. He knocked quietly knowing that his brother hated to be disturbed when he was working.
"What is it?" He could hear the annoyance in Sesshomaru's voice, even though Inuyasha knew he was trying to hide it.
Inuyasha pushed at the door, slightly cracked. He knocked quietly knowing that his brother hated to be disturbed when he was working.
"What is it?" He could hear the annoyance in Sesshomaru's voice, even though Inuyasha knew he was trying to hide it.
Inuyasha pushed through the door, putting his most serious face on to convey the seriousness of the situation. He wanted his brother to know immediately that this wasn't just about allowance or borrowing the car.
"What's wrong?" All annoyance had disappeared and was now replaced by the rare sound of worry.
"A friend just called. Her mother died, she's at the hospital."
"How awful. Is she alright?" Sesshomaru said, not looking too worried, but it was nice of him to make an effort.
"I don't know." Inuyasha's voice was heavy and Sesshomaru could read the tension in his stiff muscles. "But there's more to it."
Inuyasha somberly explained what he'd learned only days before. His brother's face hardened more and more as Inuyasha went on. The pain that plagued Sesshomaru for what he hadn't been able to do for Inuyasha was revisiting him. Inuyasha knew it.
"You should have told someone when you found out. It could be your friend dead in the hospital." Inuyasha opened his mouth to reply, but Sesshomaru cut him off with a wave of his slender hand. "But it's two late now to worry about that now. I'm glad to came to me."
The drive over to the hospital was tense. Both brothers were silent, thinking. Sesshomaru went to the desk to ask after Kagome and Inuyasha hung back, looking around him. Sesshomuru had barely spoken two words before he heard her.
"Inuyasha!" Kagome was racing towards him.
Without saying a word in response he jogged to meet her. They met halfway, he held out his arms and she threw herself into them. He held her as tight as he could as she cried anew. She clutched him with only one arm, the other she let hang limply at her side. He peered over her shoulder at it and saw that it was heavily bandaged. His mouth set in a grim line. But the way her body wracked with each pained sob drew his attention away. He rocked her gently like he had that night that seemed like another life.
He saw his brother watching, keeping a distance. He looked very solemn, but gave them the time and space they needed.
When Inuyasha felt her slowly start to relax he moved her to sit on a nearby chair, placing himself next to her. Then he asked the question he longed, and dreaded, to know the answer to.
"What happened?" Inuyasha wondered what could have occurred to make Kagome cry so much after the death of such or horrible woman.
"She…she," Kagome took a deep shuddering breath and rubbed the tears, that had all but stopped, from her face before going on. "She drank a bottle of cleaning fluid. Around when you dropped me off. I just went right up the stairs to my room, and I heard a thud in the kitchen, but I didn't go down for a few minutes. Then when I did…I found her and…" Kagome shut her eyes and another tear slid down her cheek.
"And she was already dead?" Inuyasha pushed.
"No." Kagome whispered with her eyes squeezed shut. "I'm a monster. Just like her."
"You're not a monster. You're nothing like her!" Inuyasha took her hand in his.
"Yes I am!" She shouted, tears spilling down her cheeks again and Inuyasha tightened his grip.
"What happened Kagome?"
"I saw her there. I could hear her breathing, it was weak and raspy. I thought…I thought, 'Why does she deserve to live?' I hesitated." Her voice lowered more and more until it came out as a tiny, pained, whisper and she ripped her hand out of his. "I wanted her to die."
"But you did call." He tried to comfort her; not voicing the fact that he didn't blame her for wanted that woman out of her life.
"I was too late!" She hugged herself, clutching her injured hand.
"No. You did all that you could." He said soothingly, and wrapped her in his arms again.
She didn't cry so much this time. But she still needed him there, so he stayed. He could see his brother talking to a man in a white coat, a doctor. Sesshomaru caught his eye and nodded once, just to say he was getting all the information he could.
"Did you call Sango?" He asked the top of her head.
"Yes." Her voice was muffled against the fabric of his sweatshirt; she seemed calmer now, though still extremely subdued.
Sesshomaru motioned to him.
"I'll be right back." Inuyasha held her at arm's length. "You ok?"
"I'm numb. Is that the same thing?" She smiled weakly and leaned back against the wall to stare at the ceiling.
"Are you cold?" Inuyasha asked suspiciously as he eyed her t-shirt and bare arms.
"A little." She muttered.
Inuyasha pulled off his sweatshirt and handed it to her. She looked like she was going to refuse at first, but s he saw his expression and smiled again as she took it in her good hand. He carefully helped her into it, her bound hand impeding her motor skills.
It was big for her, but it had absorbed his body heat and she was appreciative of it warmth. She wrapped her arms around herself again and closed her eyes, as if trying to drift off to sleep, but Inuyusha had a feeling it would be a long time before simply falling asleep would be easy. Despite the morbid situation Inuyasha couldn't help thinking about how much he liked the way she looked in his sweatshirt, the way she looked like his girlfriend.
Inuyasha positioned himself next to Sesshomaru so that he cold still keep an eye on Kagome.
"She has a pretty nasty gash on her hand, stitches. There are some smaller ones on her legs, they're nothing to worry about. Lots of bruising, they know where all that came from." He looked at his brother meaningfully.
"And that bitch?" Inuyasha, your respect for the dead astonishes me." He was calm, as always. "She died in the ambulance. The doctor assures me, as he attempted to assure your friend, that she couldn't be held at fault. By the time she made it to the kitchen it was already too late."
"What is she going to do?" Inuyasha asked, running his hand through his silver hair.
"Inuyasha…how much do you know about Kagome's family?"
"Her brother's dead, Mom too now. I've never heard her say anything about a dad. She said she had nowhere to go, so I'm guessing he is out of the picture."
"Nowhere?"
"Nowhere." Inuyasha confirmed. "She said it enough."
"Then I'm going to have to assume she knows nothing about her aunt."
"What?"
"Only living relative, an aunt in California. A Miss Hitomi Higurashi." Sesshomaru waved his hand languidly. "Dr. Wilcox is on the phone with her right now."
"Who's going to tell her?" Inuyasha felt a new wave of worries break over him.
What if she takes Kagome away? Maybe it would be better for her. Is it unreasonably selfish for me to want her to stay?
"I will." Sesshomaru said with authority.
But there was no time. Sango and Miroku burst through the doors at the end of the hall. Sango was crying. Kagome launched out of her chair, she had obviously found no rest. She ran right into her friends arms and they clutched each other like a life-line, crying onto each others shoulders.
"I told you not to come. You didn't have to come." Kagome said through her tears.
"Don't be stupid." Sango said leaning back to look at her friend with tear-blurred vision. "Why didn't you tell me?"
"I didn't want to tell anyone. What if I had and they took me away? I don't know what I would have done if they had taken me away."
"It's ok. I understand." She whispered.
"I can't believe no one ever suspected." Miroku said as he approached Inuyasha and his older brother. "She hid it well."
"Do you think you could distract your girlfriend for a minute?" Inuyasha said, guilt gnawing at him as he thought about his lack of action. "We have some news for her."
"Sure." Miroku paused and eyed Inuyasha suspiciously. "Are you ok?"
"No. But I think it's for the best if I look it." Inuyasha tried not to let out his frustration on his best friend.
Sango was reluctant to leave her friend but in the end Miroku managed to pull her away, claiming Kagome needed something to eat. Kagome tried to argue but Inuyasha shushed her, taking a seat next to her, and taking her good hand in his again.
"Kagome, this is my brother Sesshomaru." Inuyasha said when his brother came to stand in front of them.
"Nice to meet you." Kagome said meekly and Inuysha gave her hand a quick squeeze.
"Kagome, I don't mean to pry, but do you know much about your father's side of the family?"
"He died when I was still a baby. I don't even remember him."
"Your brother?" Inuyasha asked confused.
"Souta had a different father. He and my mother never got married, and he didn't stick around long after she turned out to be pregnant."
"And your father never told you anything about your father's side of the family?"
"No. Why are you asking?"
"You have an aunt. Hitomi Higurashi. She lives in California."
"California?" The color drained from Kagome's face.
"Dr. Wilcox is on the phone with her now. Nothing is decided, there's no need to panic just yet." Sesshomaru managed a small smile, something he didn't do very often.
"It's going to be ok." Inuyasha reassured.
"Excuse me, sir." A stout man with thinning brown hair approached Seshomaru and pulled him aside.
"An aunt." Kagome said simply, shaking her head. "Wonder what she's like."
"This is a lot for one day, huh?"
"You have no idea." Kagome laughed wryly and put her face into her hands.
"Well, you're tough. I think you'll be ok, kid." He rubbed her back and watched his brother take over the phone.
Before he knew it he felt her right arm wrap around his neck, her face pressed against his neck. His breath caught in his throat.
"Thank you, Inuyasha."
"Don't know that I did much." Inuyasha smoothed her hair soothingly; glad that she couldn't see how red his cheeks were.
"She's on her way." A voice cut through the tender moment.
"On her way?"
"Miss Higurashi is catching the next flight. She discovered only tonight she had a niece. Needless to say she was in quite a state tonight as well."
"And she's coming? Now?"
"She's family, and she wants to meet you very much."
"She wants…I…" Kagome stuttered, her chocolate brown eyes wide. "What is she like?"
"Plenty of time for that when you meet her tomorrow."
"Thank you." Kagome said, looking astounded at Sesshomaru.
"I'm only doing what's right. Do you have somewhere to stay?"
"I'm staying with Sango."
"Good." Sesshomaru nodded his head once. "Inuyasha and I will take you to the airport tomorrow to meet your aunt."
"You'll be there?" Kagome whispered to Inuyasha, and he saw the pleading look in her dark eyes.
"Don't be stupid. Of course I'll be there." Inuyasha stood, he knew by his brother's look and the exchange of details that is was time for them to go. "I'll see you tomorrow morning. Try to get a little sleep, you look terrible."
"Good night Inuyasha." He turned to go but he heard her shout after him. "Wait! Your sweatshirt."
"You keep it. I have plenty."
She smiled and nodded weakly, pushing some loose hair behind her ears with sleeves that were far too long hiding her fingers completely. He couldn't help thinking again about how he liked the way she looked in it, the red fabric enveloping her like his on arms.
Ok so there's that. I'm sorry if the dialogue felt a little forced, I know it did to me, but this section has been giving me problems. I kept stopping right in the middle (outside elements beyond my control). But I do like that ending line...but I'm the writer soooo...tell me what you think. ;) I have two Harry Potter fics that I've been working on, however I think I'll only be putting one up. The one is about Ron and Hermione (my favorite HP pair) the other is about Oliver Wood (inspired by my love for Sean Biggerstaff) but has a made up character or two and I don't know how interested people would be in it, so it might just be for me. I have another Inuyasha fic I started but it's going kind of slow, and I haven't even touched Sinner.