Crystal: We had to re-write the chappie 'cause we wrote it in paper and not on the compie.
Phoenix: Stupid, huh?
Crystal: But we remembered most of the stuff.
Phoenix: So review…..at some point…..
(All of a sudden a chicken flies into the room and settles on Phoenix's head)
Crystal: Isn't that dinner?
Phoenix: I believe it is...I should never have left this (censored) bird with my (censored) sister. I'm going to (censored) kick her ass. (More things that even censors can't cover)
Crystal: I knew being stranded on an island for two years would come in handy.
Chicken: Bawk! Babawk! (Trans: That makes no sense)
Crystal: …..Shut up.
Phoenix: (Takes out ray gun and aims at her own head) Time for the chicken to go bye bye!
Crystal: Nooooooooo!
Phoenix: (Pulls trigger)
Disclaimer: The evil lawyers are making us put this here so here we go. We don't own Inuyasha; we only own…..nothing……that's depressing…..well, now we have to go whip some monkeys. Bye!
Naraku is what?
"Know your stars, Know your stars, Know your stars…."
Naraku looked around. "What matter of place is this?"
"Hmm, well it could be a torturing area or a dungeon….." Phoenix said.
"But we prefer 'Phoenix and Crystal's area of perfectly LEGAL happenings.'" Crystal finished.
"Anyways, Naraku……he has a monkey fetish."
"You can prove nothing." Naraku said calmly.
"Naraku…..he wears a pink tutu."
Naraku giggled. "I loved my tutu!" He brought out a picture of a monkey boy in a tutu.
"But when I was younger some kids would make fun of me all the time" he whimpered.
"Poor you," Crystal said absent-mindedly.
"They threw sticks and stones, which broke my bones and their words…..they hurt me!" Naraku said, sobbing.
"Did you get back at them?" Phoenix said teary-eyed.
"Of course I did! Who do you think I am, Inuyasha? Anyways, this boy was calling me a gay fag...so I shot him." Naraku said, saying the last part with a creepy voice and evil look upon his face. All of a sudden it got freakishly cheerful. "Anyways, aren't I cute!"
"…..Yes…..cute….." Crystal said.
"Oh! Very cute," Phoenix said, happily.
"Naraku... is a gay fag." Crystal said, bored.
Naraku let out a huge gasp. "How dare you call me that!"
"Should I be afraid?"
"Yes you should."
"Well, maybe I should send you back to where you came from!" Crystal said, raising a fist.
"No! Not the zoo!"
Crystal blinked. "The…..zoo?"
"Yes," Naraku sobbed. "The zoo! The penguins were psychotic and the…." He mumbled the rest.
"Yes…..?"
"The hippo's were….mean to me!" Naraku started to sob harder.
Crystal thought for a moment (Phoenix: A moment longer then she's ever thought in her whole life). "But, who put you there?"
Meanwhile Phoenix backed away.
"My mommy did!"
"Who's your mommy?" Crystal asked.
Naraku pointed to Phoenix. "She is!"
"Phoenix? the mother of Naraku!" Crystal gasped.
Phoenix laughed nervously. "Eheheheh….hi, honey." She looked at Crystal and sighed. "Okay, a few years back I was trolling the neighborhood, looking for hobos when I saw Naraku in the orphanage. He just looked so cute, fogging up the windows with his poison gas."
Naraku launched himself at the camera. "I still love you, mommy!"
"AW!" Phoenix hugged the camera.
Crystal sweatdropped, "Well, does anyone else feel sorry for the cameras?"
"I have a present for you Mommy!"
"Really?" Phoenix asked.
"Yes!" Naraku sent something in a box up the chute.
Phoenix tore through the present. "It's Shippo's tail!" She lifted it up. "Wait, no it's not! It's Shippo!"
Crystal poked him. "Did he have any air in there?"
"Damn it! I forgot the air!" Naraku hit himself on the forehead.
"Poor, poor Shippo……oh, well, I'm over it!" Phoenix said cheerfully. She leaned into the microphone. "Security? Call the zoo dudes."
"NOO! Mommy, I thought you loved me!" Naraku cried as he was pulled away.
"Don't worry, honey! I'll visit you!" (Phoenix: Yeah, right...)
Crystal: Hello people! .
Phoenix: Ignore her. She's possessed.
Crystal: (Glares) Anyways, today we will be making Jaken fingers!
Phoenix: But first we need Jaken (Takes out Jaken)
Jaken: What are you going to do to me, you wretched girls!
Phoenix: (Shifty eyes) Nothing...(Gags him)
Crystal: And we need Jaken's finger so...
Phoenix: We chop 'em off! (Chops off his finger)
Crystal: And knock him out before he calls the police! (Knocks him out and locks him in a broom closet)
Phoenix: Now, we fry his fingers (Fries his fingers) for about 20 minutes
20 minutes later
Crystal: They're done! (Takes a bite) Ugh! These taste like shit!
Phoenix: Are you saying you've eaten shit?
Crystal: It's a metaphor!
Phoenix: Suuuuuuuuuuuuure...
Crystal: I don't think we want to know where his fingers have been for the past few days (Shudders)
Phoenix: You're not alone. You're not alone. YAY! PEPTO BISMOL!
Crystal: Nausea, heart burn, indigestion, upset stomach, diarrhea!
Phoenix: YAY! PEPTO BISMOL!
Review time! Review time!
Telling us what you want!
And we might answer!
Not likely but whatever!
It's not like anybody caaaaaaares!
Kagome's Girl: Don't worry….they'll come…hehehehe…..
Lovelykaedeinufan: We plan for it soon. Probably in two chapters!
Alanna-the-tai-youkai: Jaken is actually very soon! You'll LOVE it!