To my dear readers…after construing this chapter I would like you to read the message below. please? anyone who'll review will get credit, I promise you that.

Part 4 up!

…

WHAT WE REALLY FEEL

Part 4 of 5

"Ma'am! Ma'am! We still have to fix the wiring!" repairman Mick called out.

Stacy scowled as she tried to drive out her own Beetle out of the repair section. Mick was following her, and he should be glad that she was at least driving a little slow, or she would have ran him over carelessly.

After that abrupt turn down to Randy a few nights ago, Stacy had a bad week. Her brown eyes were already blotchy and swelling from too much crying, she barely had a good night sleep, and she couldn't even eat properly, without knowing why. Trish immediately found out and Stacy had all up to hear to all from her best friend's put downs. The slumber party and two cartons of chocolate ice cream didn't help either. And now the problem with her stupid Beetle was adding.

"You know every time I come here you always find something broken in my car!" Stacy yelled at him from her car window. "Of all the many times I came here it's always my car you're giving your attention to!"

"But your boyfriend insisted on fixing it until it works!" Mick asserted.

"I TOLD YOU HE ISN'T MY BOYFRIEND!" Stacy finally lashed. And without a word, she exited the gasoline station.

A few seconds later, Randy's car parked on station and walked towards the repair section. He looked around, and knew something was wrong. Stacy's Beetle wasn't in its usual place. He ran up to Mick, who continues to fret obliviously.

"Where's Stacy's car?" he demanded.

"She was here a second ago to get it," the repairman responded.

Randy groaned. "Why did you give it to her? It's still broken!"

Ignoring Mick's rebukes that he wasn't Stacy's boyfriend after all, Randy ran to his car, drove it out of the gasoline station, and settled onto traffic. Cars were honking loudly under the hot afternoon sun. Randy kept tried to look out of the window, but there were too many cars.

"Come on!" Randy yelled, frustrated. "What the hell is this about!"

Caving in, he hopped out of the car and tiptoed to find out what the ruckus was all about. When few cars moved a little to gain way and give a clearer picture, Randy nearly tripped from his own Nikes.

It was Stacy, standing from behind her car, opening the engine and fanning the smoke away, despite the traffic she was already making. Randy quickly ran to her.

"Stacy!" Randy hollered.

Seeing him, Stacy slammed her engine shut. "Leave me alone!" Then she went back inside her car and steered away from him.

"Stacy, wait! Your car is still broken!" Randy insisted, running and pounding on her windows at the same time.

"You get away from me or I'll run you over!" she threatened. She floored the gas pedal hard and sped off.

Randy ran back to his Beetle to follow her. He knew what he did was wrong and he was willing to apologize. He even prepared a speech to explain himself that he didn't mean to hurt her. But Stacy was being stubborn, ignoring his calls and refused to contact him. He couldn't even find a way to make her listen without causing her to become violent. Trish couldn't talk to him either. It was as if the whole world was punishing him.

Now…he didn't even know if he could ever commit to someone he really cared for. And the problem was, the two of them aren't really together yet. This is worse than being dumped.

No, stop it, Randy reminded himself. Things will get better. And Stacy will forgive me.

I hope.

When Randy arrived at East Coast, Stacy's car was already parked in front of the house. Randy walked out of the car, and rung the doorbell several times. No answer. He tried to look at the windows. All curtained.

"Damn it…" Randy muttered. He fished out his phone and dialed Stacy's number.

After a few rings, he heard a beep, then a voice recorded repeated sound.

"The number you dialed is not yet in service."

The cellphone was turned off. Randy put it back on his pocket and stood rigid beside his car.

I'm not leaving until she comes out, and I don't care how long it'll take.

…

9:00 p.m.

The streetlights were already on, and only few people dared to strut down the sidewalk on the late hour.

Stacy, already changed into a white tank top and loose pants, quietly crept on her bedroom floor to the window. Randy's car was still there, parked in front of hers. And the owner was sitting on the outdoor benches, rubbing his eyes sleepily and yawning without covering his mouth.

As if noticing her presence, Randy turned around and saw her looking at him. His blue eyes widened a little, showing a hint of apprehension, excitement, and maybe a little hope. How Stacy loved to look at those eyes, drown in those light blue pools she found attractive.

But she had to end it.

With a shake of her head, Stacy walked away from the window and turned off the bedroom lights.

Randy's eagerness melted away from his face when he saw only darkness from Stacy's bedroom. Giving up, he staggered his way inside his car and drove towards the exit of the subdivision. He was exhausted, he was tired…and more to the point, he was fed up.

Unknown to Randy, Stacy was still looking at the dimming taillights of his car from her bedroom window.

…

"Did Stacy dump you, sweetie?" Mrs. Orton asked.

Randy leaned against the marble balcony, the night dark and windy. But he had too much to worry about other than getting cold.

"No Mom, she didn't dump me," Randy answered. "We're not even together yet. I don't know…"

Mrs. Orton walked to his son beside her. They didn't say anything for a few seconds.

"Mom…didn't you say…if I found the right person, I will love her for keeps?" Randy queried.

His mother nodded.

"Then what happened to you and Dad? Did you think you were right for each other?"

"Of course I did."

Randy suddenly felt so weary. "But why the separation? I…I'm afraid, Mom. How much of me is Dad?"

Mrs. Orton sighed and ruffled Randy's brown hair. "Randall… we don't inherit the ability to love. You learn to love with your heart." Then she pointed a finger to his chest. "It's in there. You'll just feel it right there."

Is that what I'm feeling the whole time? Randy asked himself.

Damnable world, damnable hell, damnable emotions…

First of all, it wasn't really like him to forget his cocky façade. And also, to surrender to things he thought he was so good at. After everything that had happened…that unknown road, the lunch at McDonald's, the night at the gasoline station…was a whole new experience for him. And then Stacy went into his mind.

As she happened, Randy's heart suddenly throbbed. Then the invisible blow to the chest area suddenly came again.

Should I just give up?

Stacy was polishing her car, despite the fact that it was late, silently cursing to the repairmen on the gasoline station for not wiping it. As she polished the grill, she saw a small black dirty spot sticking there.

She frowned. Slathering polish all over the cloth, she wiped the spot.

Still there. Stacy wiped it again.

Her frown deepened. The spot was still there.

Annoyed, she threw the cloth on the grill, crossed her arms and gave the car a good kick, never fearing she might dislodge it. Then the sound of leather clogs clicked on the pavement.

"Oh…if you're finished and you're still in a bad mood…wipe my car, okay?" Trish quipped.

Stacy didn't find the joke funny. Instead she ignored Trish, picked up the forgotten cloth and wiped the front. Trish was still there, leaning against the driver's door.

"You know what? I hate to say this, but I told you so," Trish advised. "I watched this scene too many times."

Stacy was aware of the smirk the petite blonde was giving her. She abruptly stood up, passed by Trish, and took the can of polish with her, then started wiping on the back of her car, still not giving her friend a little eye contact.

"But you know, in fairness to him, he done a lot of things to you than to me," Trish continued. "There's effort, to say the least."

Stacy still wasn't saying anything.

Trish crossed her arms. "Stacy, I think the one who has a problem is not Randy. It's you who has a problem."

Stacy stopped wiping and sighed. "What if I just get myself hurt even more?"

"What if you didn't? You never know. It's just a waste," Trish asserted.

Stacy gave up wiping and finally looked at Trish. "You're right. I'm just… I'm just afraid to take chances."

Trish rolled her eyes. "I don't know why you have so many hang-ups. If you ever got hurt, it'll just pass away. Maybe…maybe Randy's not that bad after all."

The leggy girl swallowed. Her friend was always right. Randy isn't really a bad person. A little cocky, maybe, but not really that overpowering. It was the fear of hurt overpowering her. Physically he was no heartbreaker. But hers was breaking now. And she found these moments worsen if Randy wasn't with her. When she was with her, she felt free. She didn't feel scared, rejected, judged, unhappy, alone. And the fuzzy feeling inside her kept turning into a giant at the mere thought of him. The funny part was, he was the only person in the world that could make her feel this way, no matter how stupid or crazy it sounds.

Could this be love?

To be or not to be?

That remains the question, for now.

(t.b.c.)

As for the question I was asking… can anyone here speak Spanish or French? It's stupid but I kinda need it. We don't study that here in school, damn those nuns… and it's really important, if you want me to continue this fic…as Randy and Stacy's story finally comes into closure! If you'll be able to answer these, just review and don't put it into e-mail because I barely check them. Please and thank you!

SENTENCES TO BE TRANSLATED:

You could have been cute if you weren't so grumpy.

You always think of yourself! You think I like living here! My life's better back in Mexico/France! You're making a fool out of me!

You could have been cute if you weren't so cheap.

You are so cute!

Grumpy boy…good thing you're cute.

You're much cuter!

I know, strange words…but they'll be a significance to his fic soon! Translate it in French or Spanish, it's okay! Just please please please help me!