Well, Adamantoise is still around. And there's all these other jerks walking around too!
"Yes, I'm sure. I would like to retire from Another Quest For Truth. What? Oh, yes. Sandra and Kaylee and Heather all agreed. They want to retire too. Well, it's so we can spend more time on the Deathmatches, ya? Okay. C ya!" Eva says into her cell phone.
"Look! Outside! It's Rikku!" Sandra exclaims.
"HI! Who am I gonna fight?" Rikku asks.
"Wanna fight Adamantoise?" Eva asks.
"SURE!" Rikku shouts.
She grabs her Godhand and enters the Arena.
Battle 1: Rikku VS Adamantoise
"Stupid turtle! I saw Wakka destroy one of you guys!" Rikku taunts.
The fiend just roars.
"You're going down!" Rikku taunts as she attacks.
The turtle causes an earthquake.
"Ow! Y'know, I'm scary when I get mad!" Rikku warns.
Rikku mixes two supreme gems for Sunburst. The Adamantoise dies.
"Too easy!" Rikku exclaims.
Rikku is the victor.
"Yeah! Wait, what was that?" Cid asks.
"Sunburst? Never heard of it!" Barret says.
"Looks like Ultima." Aeris comments.
"What was the prize again?" Eva asks.
"I forget!" Sandra exclaims.
Rikku receives 10000 sugar cookies.
"All right.. that's a good prize. But who offered it?" Kaylee asks.
Homer Simpson is seen sneaking out the back door.
"Ohhh kay... anyway, what? Rinoa's back?" Sandra exclaims.
Indeed, Rinoa has reappeared (respawned?) outside in a dumpster. How the hell did she come back to life?
"Ohh, Squall... how could you?" Rinoa whispers.
Amarant walks by, looks in the dumpster, and pukes.
"What's she been eating in there.. ?" he wonders.
"Well, it seems we're almost outta money... I just heard from Ramza. He says this'll be the last Deathmatches series. Sad, isn't it? We just retired from 'Another Quest' to carry this on.." Eva says sadly.
"Well, we'll go out with a BANG!" Sandra exclaims.
Final Battle: YRP VS Kefka, Sephiroth, Kuja, Seymour, and Shuyin
YRP enter the arena.
"This doesn't look good.." Yuna says.
"I can take 'em!" Rikku says.
"Let's just win.." Paine says.
The villains advance.
"There ain't nothin' I can't steal!" Rikku taunts.
Rikku stole 16273 pounds of lard from Kuja.
"Ewwwwwww! Lard!" Rikku whines as she wipes off the lard.
"I got it!" Yuna declares as he Trigger Happy's Seymour.
"Stop that! We're married!" Seymour yells.
"Not anymore! I got us a divorce!" Yuna says as she holds up a divorce form.
"WHAT? YOU BITCH!" Seymour screams... and gets blown away by Paine's Excalibur attack.
Yuna blasts the hell out of Shuyin. Rikku steals Kefka's boots. There's SAND on them! And IN them... Paine slices Shuyin in half! Yuna pops a cap in Kuja's ass. Kuja kisses Rikku and gets kicked in the ass! Paine slices Kuja in half! Sephiroth does Sin Harvest!
"Oh no... we're done for.." Yuna moans.
"NOT IF I CAN HELP IT!" an unknown voice yells.
"HADOKEN!" the same voice screams.
A big beam of light flies across the arena and blasts Sephiroth to hell! Out of the shadows comes Black Mage.
"What a fuggin' idiot!" he says.
YRP are the victors... (with some help from B.M!)
"Cool! Paine's got the moves!" Cid exclaims.
"Black Mage kicks ass!" Barret comments.
"Sephiroth's gone! Yay!" Aeris shouts cheerfully.
"Well, that's my Hadoken for the day!" B.M says as he makes his way out.
"Well, that was our final battle! I told ya we'd go out with a BANG!" Sandra announces.
"Yay! B.M saved us all!" Eva cheers.
"I wanna get his autograph!" Sandra exclaims as she runs out after Black Mage. "Hey, B.M! Wait up!"
"Well, that's it for the Ultimate Deathmatches! Hope everyone had fun, ya? C ya!" Eva announces.
The End!
"My ass! My f--kin' ass!" Seymour screams as Yuna shoves a firecracker up his ass.
Seymour gets blown to hell where he can marry Sephiroth or something!
And Rinoa? Oh she'll be fine... how DID she come back to life?
"Angelo did it! Isn't he wonderful?" Rinoa says.
THINGS TO DO:
Kill Angelo
Feed Rinoa to a Malboro
Ask Quistis out
Make Zell date Selphie
Kill Cait Sith for the millionth time (bastard keeps coming back)
Yes, THE END!
Cunno.