Final Fantasy VII rights Squaresoft does own; I do not. Please RandR, or may Sephiroth take your soul.
Magic 8-Ball says, "The HELL.?"
The Dance of the Chocobos: Mad Spinnies in the Airness!
So the SimpTag had grabbed the greasy monkey away from the singing quartet. Well, as these singing quartet people represented the highest authority, they simply would not take this kind of treatment. So they each picked up an assortment of harmonicas and...
THE FOLLOWING SCENES HAVE BEEN DELETED DUE TO GORY CONTENT.
Well, Sephiroth was horrified. In all his life, he'd never seen such gore. Only the SimpTag was left standing.
DUE TO LAWSUITS, SimpTag WILL NO LONGER BE USED BY THE AUTHORESS. SHE HAS DECIDED TO SUE HERSELF.
The ticket vendor yells to the group.
Ticket vendor: Hey everyone! If you want to go to the "Gold Saucer", hurry and get on! Ride the Ropeway?
Angael: Okay. A large group of fully-grown people is not going to get on a two ton Ropeway that is supported by only ONE FLIMSY WIRE!
Cloud grabs her by the back of her shirt and drags her inside.
Cloud: You need some sleep, don't you?
Angael: ...maybe.
Aerith: Tee hee! You can use my middy jacket as a pillow!
Angael: N- no! ANYTHING BUT THE ROP-AWK!
Cloud drags her onto the Ropeway.
Barret: Dyne was my best friend. We was close ever since we was kids...
Yuffie: ...huh? We're still talking about that?
Tifa: Yeah. Anyways, so Cloud just won't pick up on the hints...
Yuffie: Fascinating.
Barret: My ear!
After the Ropeway pulls into Gold Saucer station, they all get off and head towards the entrance.
Disembodied chocobo suit: Welcome to Gold Saucer!
Cloud: … :scared:
Ticket lady: Welcome to the Gold Saucer. Are you together? A single pass is 3000 gil, or you can purchase a lifetime pass for 30000 gil…Oh, wait…
She looks at them.
Ticket lady: …a guy with chocobo hair. There was a lady who bought a lifetime pass for all of you earlier.
Angael: GOOD! GIVE IT TO ME NOW::snatch:
Ticket lady: Geez…! Be a little more snatchy, thank you very much! If you have a Gold Ticket, you can come and go freely into the park… as long as you don't lose it.
:singing: I've got a golden ticket…
Ticket lady: Here at the Gold Saucer, there are many places where you must pay with GP. Just think of "GP" as money that you can only use at the Gold Saucer.
Tifa: So it's like one of those dreams where it's so realistic that you ACTUALLY think you're married to Rufus, and have all that money to spend, and then you wake up and are disappointed when you realize you're in the rat-infested slums of sector 7…
She notices everyone staring at her.
Tifa: …what?
Ticket lady: GP can only be redeemed at the games in Wonder Square and at the Chocobo Races. Your GP limit is 10000, so please be careful. Please enjoy yourselves.
Elsewhere…
Sephiroth: So how many GP is that now…?
Crystal::counting: 9999. We've gotta be careful. Only got room for one more…
Back with Cloud and the others…
Aerith: Wow! Let's have fun! Tee hee!
Everyone else: …
Red XIII: Like she hasn't a care in the world…
Angael: LIKE MY EX-BEST FRIEND ISN'T TRYING TO PUT THE MOVES ON MY SEPHERS!
April: Like she doesn't know she's gonna die at the end of this disc…
Cloud: …what?
April: …um… nothing?
Aerith: Oh, I know this isn't the right time to do this. Hey, Barret, cheer up!
Barret: I ain't in no cheery mood. So jes' leave me alone.
Aerith: Really? That's too bad…
She whispers something in his ear.
Barret: … :blushblushblush:
Aerith runs over to Cloud.
Aerith: Let's go!
Tifa runs over and grabs Aerith's shoulder.
Tifa: …whisper… whisper… :whispering: Wasn't that a little harsh, Aerith?
Aerith: …whisper… whisper… :whispering: Just act normal when this happens.
Tifa: …whisper… whisper… :whispering: You think so…?
Aerith: Of course!
Tifa: My ear! Bitch!
Aerith: Slut!
Tifa: Prostitute!
Aerith: Whore!
Tifa: Boobless witch!
Aerith: Cottage cheese factory!
Tifa: Aaaaaarrgh!
Aerith: Tee hee
She skips over towards Barret.
Aerith: We're gonna go play!
Barret::flailing: So PLAY! ...messin' round #$! Don't forget we're after Sephiroth!
Angael: Sephiroth?
Cloud: Sephiroth!
April: Rufus!
Yuffie: Materia!
Red XIII: Wastrels!
April: HUGGLE::huggle:
Red XIII: ... :huggled:
Angael: How could ANYONE forget to chase Sephiroth::drool:
Barret shakes his head and leaves into Wonder Square.
Aerith: ...I think he's mad.
Yuffie: Nooo... ya THINK?
Tifa: You are SUCH a genius, Aerith! NOW look what you've done!
April: It's okay. She's just trying to seem like an innocent ditz so she'll be remembered in the end by the OTHER dumb blond.
Everyone else except Angael and Katie?
Cloud: ...dumb blonde? Whozat?
Katie::swoon: Cloud's so CUTE!
Cloud: o.O; W-wow! Someone... who's over ten... thinks I'm... cute... :sweat:
Aerith and Tifa: Bwa..!
Everyone except Cloud face faults.
Meanwhile, back with Sephiroth and Crystal, Sephiroth has met Dio.
Sephiroth: Hey... have you heard of a think called the "Black Materia"?
Dio: Sure haven't! Ha ha ha!
Sephiroth: ...
Dio: Hey, boy... Why don't you and your girlfriend have a good time? I'm sure you'll find what you're looking for.
Sephiroth: She's not my girlfriend.
Crystal: My standards are too high.
Dio: Ha ha ha! We have a nice romantic suite at Ghost Square!
Sephiroth: ... :not listening: I wonder where I can find a pair of Masamune boxers...
Crystal: ...Wark!
Sephiroth: Chocobo! RUN AWAY!
He runs away like a little Nancy. Remember Chapter 3? Anyways, Barret is wandering around Wonder Square.
Barret: I'm feelin' better now...
Back with Cloud...
Tifa: He'll be fine. He seems to be doing a little better now.
We return, again, to Crystal and Sephiroth.
Crystal: Oh! Dance Dance Revolution! Let's play! If I beat you, you have to help me wake up Vincent!
Sephiroth: The dancing game? Okay.
The put in some coins.
Screen music::happy music: I want to ride my bicycle...!
Sephiroth and Crystal start to dance... exactly the same! The moves are wild and alluring, with mad spinnies in the airness! I'm not actually that good...
Screen music::same as before: Don't believe in Peter Pan, Frankenstein or Super Man...!
DDR: Perfect! Perfect! Perfect!
Crystal: Yeehaw!
Sephiroth: ...must... win...!
They continue their mad-ass cool dancing!
Screen music::happy cheering: Don't wanna be the President of America!
Crystal::singing: I say, "Cheese!"... Please!... I say, "Jesus!"
Screen music and Crystal::more happy music and singing: I don't wanna be a canidate or be another Watergate 'cause all I wanna do is...
Screen music, Sephiroth, and Crystal::music and singing in unison: Bicycle! Bicycle! Bicycle!
Screen music and Crystal::singing and wailing loudly: I want to ride my...!
Screen music, Sephiroth, and Crystal::same as before: Bicycle! Bicycle! Bicycle!
Zechs Merquise::watching: Wow.
After an overly happy tie, Sephiroth and Crystal sit down for some lunch.
Sephiroth: So, I wouldn't know... What's it like having a best friend?
He bites into his reuben.
Crystal: Not easy... Especially with Angael...
She stuffs a large chocolate doughnut into her mouth.
Sephiroth: What's the hardest part of it?
Crystal: Escaping unscathed.
Good news, ladies and germs! I've started on the comic, have a scanner set up, and will cough eventually cough get my comic version up for all to see! As for "Dancing in the Ruins", it may not be up for a while, so don't even bother looking for it at this point. I'll tell you as soon as I put it back on. Please be sure to check out the comic version, though it may not be up for another two or three weeks. It's going to go up in chapter segments. Watch for Chapter 19!