Toxic

Ginny Weasley

I knew this would happen. It's precisely the reason I didn't want to run away. It's also the reason I tried to run away from the first cave alone. It's also the reason I can't handle being out here… why I act so much unlike myself.

I can't believe Ron and Hermione aren't noticing. I'm not being my usual, chatty self… and if I am, I'm talking about the strangest things. I can't control it… and it's killing me.

You see… I'm not nearly as much of a goody-goody as everyone thinks I am. That's right… Ginny Weasley, the Gryffindor good girl smokes cigarettes. Yeah, yeah… surprising, I know. I tried to quit once, but I couldn't.

When did this start? My fourth year, when things with the Order were starting to get serious. I started feeling stressed out, under pressure, unsure of myself and future for the first time.

And I was real careful about not getting caught, too. So for two years, I was a not-quite-a-pack-a-day smoker. They were mostly muggle cigarettes, which were really easy to get since no muggles knew who I was. I would get a large box of them at a time and charm them to look like socks while I was at home and at school. I would perform a simple spell and they would become the cigarettes again.

You might wonder how I got away with this. Well, let me assure you, I wasn't the first student to think of this. I wasn't the only one, either. Most people would sneak outside at night to smoke, but I did it in Moaning Myrtle's bathroom after classes. There were a few occasions where I would go outside, but that wasn't very often. I was too afraid someone would see me.

I'm sure all of this is very surprising, but let me assure you that I harbor a lot of secrets. Little Ginny Weasley is hardly as innocent and sweet as most people want to believe.

But coming to The Blaze presented a problem: no cigarettes. The addiction and withdrawal were so terrible that I was having mood swings and headaches. I knew there was a simple spell that would detoxify my body from all the substances that shouldn't be there, but I couldn't tell them I needed the wand for that. And besides, the spell could take up to a week, depending on how bad your insides were. And it was risky, too… only experienced medi-witches should do it.

"Are you alright, Gin?" Ron asked good-naturedly. I knew he was only trying to show concern, but I snapped at him.

"Yes, Ron, I'm bloody wonderful!" I yelled bitterly.

"Okay, Ginny, calm down!" Hermione said softly.

"You want me to calm down! You have no idea what I'm going through, Hermione!"

This got some raised eyebrows. "Just what are you going through?" Hermione asked suspiciously.

I bit my lip, not wanting to answer.

"I thought you were acting strange lately, Gin," Neville admitted. "What's going on?"

"Nothing!" I insisted. "I'm fine! Why can't you just drop it!"

"You usually aren't this snappy, Gin."

"I'm not snappy, Ron! I'm fine!"

"I think I know what's going on," Malfoy said slowly.

"You don't know anything about me!" I yelled. Taking this out on them felt so good, even though I knew it was wrong. It was exactly like me and the smoking… I knew it wasn't healthy or smart, but I did it anyway.

"Weasley, I saw you once, out by the lake. You were—"

"Shut up!" I interrupted. "Don't make things up!"

"What was she doing?" Ron asked with interest.

"She was smoking," Malfoy said the words I really dreaded.

"Ginny!" Ron yelled. "Is that true?"

"Of course not!" I said, glaring convincingly at Malfoy. They all looked intently at me, so I slouched over and muttered, "Okay, maybe it's true…"

"I can't believe this!" Ron exploded. "What the hell is wrong with you? Don't you know how many people die from that? Where did you even get them? Who the bloody hell sold them to you? I'm going to bloody kill them!"

"Ron, calm down," Hermione pleaded. "You're not helping."

"Sorry," he said after taking a deep breath. "Look, Gin, it doesn't matter. I know you're going through withdrawal, and I know you need help."

"We could do that detoxification spell…" Neville suggested meekly.

"We could," Hermione said. "It's not that hard… I saw Madam Pomfrey perform it on a Hufflepuff when I was in the infirmary once. Hey, Malfoy, you've got the wand, right?"

"Yeah…" he said slowly.

"Alright, then, hand it over."

"Not so fast," Malfoy said, pushing her hand away. "I'm tired of doing people favors. What will I get out of this?"

"You're such a jerk, Malfoy!" Ron said angrily. "My sister is having killer headaches and mood swings and you want to know what you'll get in return for helping her?"

"That's right," he nodded.

Hermione groaned. "Look, just… what do you want?"

Malfoy smirked evilly. "You're going to regret asking that, Granger."

Hermione visibly cringed. "It doesn't matter. Within reason, whatever it is, you'll get it. Ginny needs that spell."

I inwardly smiled at Hermione's selflessness. She was the best friend anyone could ask for.

"Alright," Malfoy said with that same, arrogant smirk gracing his lips. "I think a kiss will do it."

"Excuse me?" I asked, scowling.

"A kiss, from Granger," he said.

"You're sick," Hermione said. "Think of something else."

"I hardly see how that's not within reason. I haven't been with a girl in over a week," Malfoy whined.

"I refuse to be your Pansy Parkinson!" Hermione said.

"I see how it is," Malfoy said quietly. "You'd rather let your friend suffer than give me one, little, meaningless kiss. And you dare to call me selfish, Granger."

Hermione looked at the ground. She was having a mental debate. Should she stick to her morals or help me? I felt like I should say something, but my migraine was killing me.

And then, like the loyal Gryffindor she was, Hermione walked closer to Malfoy and took a deep breath. He grabbed her waist unexpectedly, making her flinch. This only seemed to make him happier—he was fueled by her discomfort and anger. He really was a complete jerk. Then he pressed his lips up against hers and proceeded to kiss her for a very long time. I think they both got caught up in the moment. She could've easily pulled away at any given time, but she didn't.

Ron cleared his throat loudly, making them jump apart. Hermione looked at the ground with embarrassment and Malfoy smirked with satisfaction. Then he handed the wand to Hermione without another word.

Author's Note: I hope that wasn't too unrealistic for you all. I think I backed up her reasons and everything, though. I just wanted to show another side of Ginny that isn't all cotton candy and ice cream… her rebellious side gets important later. And besides, the whole kiss thing had to come about eventually… it's working out better having them do it against their will(s). For those of you who ask when they get to The Blaze… be patient! They said it would take almost a month, remember? I'm trying to speed things up a bit (the really good/big things happen once they arrive), but I don't want you all to just blink and suddenly they're there. To firedarkness, they aren't using wandless magic… she used the wand without saying words out loud. Hermione Charlotte Granger—I'm not sure if they'll find other wands yet. I'm still debating over this one. Sayaku-chan, I hope you work through whatever problems you're having… I really miss reading your story! NEXT CHAPTER SPOILER: Hermione reflects on the kiss, talks about their schedule… it's not the most eventful chapter. Or is it? NOTICE: I wanted to let you all know that I came up with an idea for a new story… DM/HG, of course, and it's going to be posted when this one finishes up. But that won't happen for a while, don't worry. I would give you a brief summary, but I think I'll wait a few chapters for that. REVIEW, please!