The next day, Mom and Dad were waiting at the car for Calvin. They had filled it to capacity with all the stuff.

"Come on, Calvin!" Dad shouted. "We're going to be late!"

"We're on a deadline?" Mom asked.

"CALVIN!" Dad repeated.

Calvin looked out the window at Dad. He turned to Hobbes.

"Remember, Hobbes," he said. "All for one…"

"…and one for all," Hobbes finished.

They grabbed their bags.

"You packed everything we needed, right?" Hobbes asked.

"It's all set," Calvin replied.

They looked outside, pausing.

"Of course, we don't have to go out there right this second," Calvin suggested.

"Right, I mean, I just ate."

"CALVIN, GET OUT HERE!" Dad shouted.

Calvin and Hobbes slowly left the house.

Dad looked down at his son carrying a stuffed tiger.

"Calvin, I said only bring the essentials," he said.

"I did," Calvin said.

"Well, Hobbes isn't an essential."

"Of course he is!" Calvin said. "I need him to fight the boredom of this boring car ride."

"Calvin, as your father, I am ordering you to leave Hobbes here."

Calvin's eyes went wide. Did his dad just say that?

"WHAT!" he shouted. "But Hobbes is my best friend!"

"Well then, you need to pick your friends better. Now put him back in your room."

Calvin couldn't believe this was happening! Mom and Dad had always been a little tolerant about Hobbes, and now here they were trying to get rid of him!

"Calvin, listen to your father," Mom said.

"Why start now?" Calvin asked.

"Look, just leave Hobbes," Dad said. "I'm sure he'll have a good time without you."

Calvin glared at Hobbes. "He sure had better not."

"Take him back to the house," Dad ordered.

Calvin muttered something and carried Hobbes back to the house.

Once there, Hobbes said, "Well, have fun battling aliens and scientists."

He started to leave, but Calvin tossed his hypercube into the air, and it landed on Hobbes' head, open side first, and Hobbes was instantly sucked into it. Calvin quickly picked it up and jammed it into his backpack.

"Sorry, Hobbes, but it's my job to rebel against what Mom and Dad say."

Calvin quickly ran back to the car, pretending to be mad.

"Someday, you're going to thank me for this, Calvin," Dad said with a satisfied grin.

"Or kill you for this, whichever occurs first," Calvin replied, hiding a sly grin.

Once they were out on the road, Calvin was getting more and more bored. This was strange, seeing as how he was heading to an island with lasers, but without Hobbes sitting next to him, he was unable to plan properly.

"This is BOR-ING!" he shouted at last.

"It won't be boring once we get there," Dad said in a too-cheerful-for-his-own-good-voice. "You'll see. We'll hike and fish and refry some beans and swim! There's all sorts of things!"

"Sounds like a load of fun," Calvin said. "Such a shame it'll be ruined when the mad scientists and aliens get us!"

"Calvin, you're only proving us right when we say you have a problem," Mom said.

"Look, let's just go home. Aliens or not, we'll perish on that rock either way."

"You're such a spoil sport," Dad said. "Name all the bad things that possibly happen."

Calvin went to say something, but Dad stopped him.

"There, see? Nothing to worry about."

"Yeah, except for the poison ivy, dry spam, cold waters, lumpy sleeping bags, wild animals, dampness, blistering sun, blistered ankles, cuts and bruises, shortage of real food, endless rain, mosquitoes, malaria, hypothermia, pneumonia, your dumb character speeches, your dumb early-bird thing, gutting the fish, getting stuck on a boat with you yammering, the bad running distance from the tents to the canoe, the intolerable winds that occur at noon, your inability to make a campfire, actually eating what's in the duffel bag, losing half the luggage on the way home, the creepy guy at the canoe rental shack, the idiotic campfire songs, the no TV, and the fact that you can't camp to save your life, there should be no worries." He inhaled deeply.

Dad stomped on the brakes. "How would you like to walk home, pal?"

Calvin turned and hopped out of the car, running for his life.

Dad sighed and ran after him. "GET BACK HERE!"

After another hour of driving, they finally arrived at the campsite.

"Let's go, everyone!" Dad cheered.

No one moved.

"Come on, let's get going!"

Nothing.

"Otherwise we'll sit here all week with some fun discussions about tree frogs."

"Very well," Calvin said. "Why do they live in trees?"

"I think they're afraid to set foot on the ground," said Mom.

"Out now!" Dad hollered.

Mom and Calvin slowly got out of the car, gathering their things.

Dad approached the weird guy at the canoe rental. He basically looked like a freak. I can't make it any clearer than that.

"One canoe, for the full week," he said, handing him the money.

"You want some shovels for a couple bucks?" he asked.

"Why would we want shovels?" Dad asked.

"Well, don't ya know? You should. You're here every year."

"Why, what's out there?"

"Gold."

Calvin instantly was on his counter, his face pressed against the glass.

"GOLD?" he asked loudly. "Where?"

"Somewhere at your campsite."

Calvin cringed. "I can't believe I'm saying this, but let's go camping!"

"Whoa, hold on," Mom said. "There's no treasure."

"Ah, but there is! Some people who were out there last week say they found a gold coin. I've been out there myself, and I found this!"

He held up a gold necklace.

Calvin eyed it closely, and then he had the nerve to bite it.

"Holy smokes, it's real!"

"You bet your spiky hair it's real. So, that'll be two dollars for shovels."

"I'm not paying for shovels," Dad said firmly.

"You don't need to!" said Calvin. He slapped two bucks down on the counter. The guy handed him a shovel.

Calvin jumped down and ran. "Grab the canoe! We're goin' treasure hunting!"

Dad grabbed him by the collar. "Calvin, hold on there. There's no gold on that island."

"How would you know?"

"I know for a fact. If any pirates were to bury a treasure, they wouldn't put it out there. It's a lake. It'd be an island out on the ocean."

"Maybe it was part of a roués! Maybe they did it to trick us all. Or maybe this whole place was underwater during pirate times, and they—"

"Calvin, trust me. There's no gold."

"Trust you? I trusted you to pick a good vacation spot, and look what happened! And I trusted you to accept Hobbes for being a tiger, and you told me to leave him at home!"

Mom bent down beside Calvin. "Calvin, you need to understand something about Hobbes. He's not exactly what you'd call 100tiger."

"Well, DUH!" Calvin said. "He's able to stand on two legs and he has opposable thumbs! Go figure!"

Dad slapped his forehead. "Look, let's not discuss this now. We have a camping trip to go on! Come on! Let's go!"

"Yeah! Let's go!" Calvin cheered.

Mom sighed.

Soon, they had loaded everything into the canoe.

All Calvin thought about the whole way treasure, treasure, treasure. He saw gold coins, necklaces, diamonds, jewels, money, moola, the green stuff, cabbage, and possibly a couple of credit cards.

"Paddle faster!" Calvin shouted. "We need to make it before the scientists find the treasure!"

"There are no scientists or aliens or gold out there," Dad said.

"You said that Mickey Mouse wasn't real, and there he was at DisneyLand."

"That one doesn't count."

Calvin looked down and saw his backpack was moving.

"Okay, okay, you can come out now."

He unzipped it, and he pulled out Hobbes.

"CALVIN!" Dad shouted.

"What?"

"I told you to leave Hobbes at home."

"What, and leave my best friend behind from the treasure hunt." He looked down at Hobbes. "Yes, treasure. The canoe freak said that there's one buried somewhere out on the island." Another pause. "I'll ask." He turned to Dad. "Dad, how much tuna would all that gold buy?"

"There's no gold," Dad said firmly. "Calvin, there are some things that you need to do without Hobbes."

"Why?"

"Well, friends aren't always there when you need them."

Calvin looked at Hobbes suspiciously. Then he eyed Dad.

"Dad, do you have a bad past?"

"Oh, you wouldn't believe it," said Mom.

"Calvin, this is serious. You need to move on beyond this tiger."

"Oh, you mean I should make friends with a lion, too? Well, that could work. Hobbes could use a sparring partner."

"No, I mean you need to make real friends."

"But Hobbes is real."

"No, Hobbes is not real"

Calvin arched an eyebrow. This was getting confusing. If Hobbes wasn't real, what was he? He looked at Hobbes, who apparently wasn't listening. He was reading a comic book.

"Something is seriously wrong with you," Calvin decided. "If Hobbes isn't real, then what is he?"

"He's a—"

"Hello!" a voice interrupted.

Everyone looked up and saw…

"DR. GRIFFIN?" everyone shouted.

Indeed, the man with wet hair stepped forward.

"What are you doing here?" asked Mom.

Calvin immediately jumped from the canoe and ran onto his coat.

"He's with the aliens, I tells ya!" he shouted. "I knew we heard humans in that ship. Fess up, pal, or face dire consequences."

"Calvin, I assure you that I have no idea what you're talking about," he said calmly.

Calvin was about to relent, but something in Dr. Griffin's eyes made him suspicious. Even so, he got down from his chest.

This guy was tough, Calvin thought, but I was ready to boil him hard. That's what we detectives do, you understand.

"What are you doing here then?" Calvin asked in a tough voice.

"I'm thought I'd drop by," he said. "I'd like to speak with your parents."

"I likely story. What would care to talk to them about?"

"Certain, private matters."

Normally, I wouldn't want to get involved in private matters, so I… Wait, what am I talking about? I'm a detective! It's my job to get involved in private matters. But before I could pry any further, I was called away to help with something.

"Calvin, we need your help with these duffel bags," Dad shouted. "They're not going to unload themselves."

"Whatever you say, Mac," Calvin said.

Mac was okay. His priorities aren't very good. He talks to animals, which is okay to an extent, but when he starts to tell them that hibernating builds character, that kind of takes their joy out of the big winter sleep.

Calvin hoisted up the duffel bag, wanting to prod Dr. Griffin some more.

Griffin is a rather shady character. He has his good points, but he isn't exactly who you'd call the most interesting guy in the world, if not most innocent. He's got some weird methods that he puts on his patients. I should know. I'm one of them.

After the duffel bag was ashore, Calvin whirled around and pointed at Griffin.

"He's evil! He's here to—"

"Calvin, shut up," Mom breathed.

"Actually, I would like to talk to you as soon as you get your camp set up," said Dr. Griffin. "I'll be in the woods at my own campsite."

"Sure," said Dad.

After Dr. Griffin left, Dad started to empty the bags.

"Is everyone ready to camp?" he asked.

"I'm ready to leave," Calvin shouted.