The Casting
Modern Day
Laughs and arguing filled the halls of the theatre, as the Dynasty Warriors await their new project. Few sitting within the seat below the stage talking or sleeping, the snores of Zhang Fei could be heard, as he laid across the seats, beer cans on the floor and on his stomach, Xing Cai was standing looking hopelessly at her drunk father.
Xing Cai - and he only started drinking 2 minutes ago...
Upon the stage Huang Gai, Dian Wei, and Lu Bu were playing football with the sandbags. Lu Bu catching the thrown bag, and tosses it at Huang Gai with brute force. Gai saw it coming and dodged it quickly, pelting Yuan Shao in the face sending him flying off the stage into he seats.
Lu Bu: Yes!
Dian Wei: Nice one!
Huang Gai: Shit that could have been me!
Everyone looked to Yuan landing place seeing he wasn't moving, and went back to his or her business. As usual Sima Yi and Zhuge Liang were at it about how to cook the roast right, and Yue only stood back sighing as they continue to fight over the stupidest things.
What seemed like forever, the Director finally came into the auditorium heading to the stage, she noticed the drunken body of Zhang Fei, and what seemed to be Yuan Shao motionless under a sandbag. She only sighed and continued on heading up on the stage.
Director - Ok! Can everyone take a seat please!
The group moved from the stage to sit, pushing Yuan Shao body to the side for now.
Director - Good, you can follow simple commands.
Cao Pi - Hey!
Director - Shut up! Anyway, I had a few calls and what not, and it seems like almighty one want you to perform the play, Phantom of the Opera. I try talking her out of it, but when she stuck on something, she won't let it go...
Zhang He - Beautiful! I want to play Christine!
Director - blinks Right, so I already made the casting, and I'll call them out to you. And if I hear any rejections or complaints...I'll kill you...
With that the Director pulled out a pieces of paper looking it over then reads out.
Director - The role of Christine is...
Jiang Wei - Question!
Director - Sighs What?
Jiang Wei- Why are you such a bitch to us?
Director looks to him, then pulls out a blowpipe and shoots him with a dart, causing him to pass out cold.
Director - Anymore questions?
Dynasty Warriors - No ma'am...
Director - Good. Now, the role of Christine is Yue Ying...
Dynasty Warriors but Yue - What?
Yue Ying - Are you kidding me?
Director - No, you're the lead role.
Yue jumps out of her chair cheering loudly, pointing to Diao Chan and Zhen Ji.
Yue Ying - Booya!
Diao Chan and Zhen Ji look to each other grumbling under their breath.
Director - Yeah...Anyway, Raoul is going to be played by Zhao Yun.
Gan Ning - Go figure!
Zhao Yun - looks to Gan Ning what do you mean by that?
Gan Ning - Such the hero...
Zhao Yun - Damn straight! You go save your lord baby behind enemy lines and find out he ruins your country when he takes over!
Gan Ning - Maybe I will!
Zhao Yun - Fine!
Gan Ning - FINE!
Director - rubs at her temples slowly Ok, I'll save the Phantom for last...Meg will be played by Xing, Cao Cao your playing lord Firmin.
Cao Cao - Whoo! I own you all!
Director - Lord Andre will be played by Liu Bei.
Sima Yi - ...not like your Cao Cao's bitch already.
Liu Bei - Hey! Andre isn't Firmin bitch!...is he?
Director - Carlotta is going to be played by Diao Chan.
Diao Chan - Yes! I'm the Diva!
Yue Ying - That's right, keep telling yourself that...
Director - Dong Zhuo will play Piangi...
Diao Chan -...who is Piangi?
Guan Yu - Carlotta husband...
Diao Chan - NO!
Dong Zhuo - Yes!
Lu Bu - I wanna be Piangi!
Director - No...
Yue Ying - Ha!
Diao Chan - Ewww...
Director - Lady Giry will be played by Zhu Rong.
Zhu Rong - Who the hell is that?
Xing Cai - My characters mommy!
Zhu Rong - Oh great, I'm the drunk's daughters, mother...
Xing Cai - Hey...
Director - Buquet is Gan Ning, Reyer is Zhou Yu, and Lefever is Sun Jian...There, cast is done...
Cao Cao - No, you didn't name the Phantom!
Zhang He - If I can't be Christine I want to be the Phantom!
Director - Oh, I thought I did. Anyway, its Sima Yi, have a good night and pulls out a stack of papers placing them on the floor these are the scripts, read them by opening night!
When the she left, she left the group in silence staring at Sima Yi, while he had a confused look on his face.
Sima Yi - Holy crap...
Guan Yu - leans to Zhang Liao whispering THIS will be a interesting play...
Zhang Liao - Nods with a grin
Zhuge Liang - I refuse to have him touching my wife!
Pang Tong - too late for complaints now Zhuge, seems opening night is only two days away...
Everyone - What?
Pang Tong - holds up the script Says right here...
The chosen actors went to pick up their scripts, looking through it. Until Gan Ning burst out.
Gan Ning - I get killed by Sima! That's not cool!
Sima Yi grins wickedly as he read his roll, Zhao Yun sighed slowly another Heroic roll, for once we wouldn't mind being evil. Yue smiled proudly as she read hers then her proud face turned nervous and looked over the book looking to Yun.
Yue Ying - We have a kissing scene...
Zhao Yun - looks to her, then to the script flipping through until he found it It seems so...
Cao Cao - Aww isn't that cute!
Xing Cai - Awww...Lucky you...
Guan Yu - Ok enough. Now the rest of you not in the play, have to help out to get this play running!
Everyone - Right!
Guan Yu - Lets give them the best Phantom of the Opera they ever seen!
Everyone - YEAH!
Zhuge Liang - Lets make Zhuge Raoul!
Everyone went silent looking to Zhuge, Yue glared at him.
Zhuge Liang - ...What?