Kurama POV

I sense the familiar demon energy outside my window. Again. But as usual, I do nothing about it. I believe that talking with him will unearth some unknown feelings that I don't feel like admitting. I guess that's why I haven't talked alone with him for almost a year. I miss that, but I'm afraid that I may say something unwanted. Though maybe I am worrying over nothing. Yomi told me that I was a master at masking my feelings and true expressions. Sure he's right, but eventually I'll want to tell Hiei something. I don't want to live my life loving him, but never knowing if he feels the same, and never having the guts to tell him either.

There is one thing that I worried over for only a short time: the homosexuality in this. Sure many humans are against it, but demons are not. Hiei probably doesn't even know what that means. Either that or he just thinks it's natural, which isn't completly false. Male-male relationships were just as common as male-female and even female-female in Makai.

I don't care what anyone would think if I told Hiei I loved him. Would I stop eating chocolate ice cream if everyone hated it? No. Would I stop loving Hiei even though everyone that knew was against it? Same difference, and I didn't care.

I am annoyed that I don't have the courage to acknowledge the demon's precense and let him in. Even if I don't let him in, just the energy itself gives me comfort. Whenever I feel depressed I come to my room and pray to God that he'll be outside my window, on that tree branch that he has come to like so much.

It disturbs me how one being can take up so much space and time in my mind. I think about him every day, and I really don't know why or how it started. Maybe several months ago, I just realized I loved him, but I didn't know why I loved him. Why did he attract me? If anything, he should push me away with that stubborn and rude attitude. But maybe it's just that. Maybe that's why I love him, because of his different personality from others. That demon personality that doesn't even match Yoko's.

Speaking of Yoko: He's always loved Hiei. Though I'm glad. It'd be hard to love a guy whom my demon side hated. There would be constant war within my body, fighting over weather Hiei was worthy or not of loving his human counterpart.

A call from my mother snaps me out of my daydreams. They've been getting worse, though I hate to admit it. The daydreams have started in school, and even worse, during exams.

"Yes mother?" I call back.

She replies that I need to get up, and that it's time for breakfast.

Yes, during all of this I was still in bed.

Quickly, I pick out one of my simple fighting tunics. The green one which I still remember is the one I wore to defeat Elder Toguro. With a bit of energy, I was able to repair the small tears, but otherwise it was as good as new.

Ever since I began sensing Hiei's precense outside my window, I began changing in my large, walk-in closet. Sure we were both males, but I did have a sense of desency, and I won't drop it and let Hiei watch me until we are more then just friends.

I'm glad I was able to eat breakfast without the demon entering my mind, though when I got in the car to run some errands for my mother, they instantly returned. I'm so glad today is Saturday.