Chapter 18: Midnight Heart-to-Heart

"Trying to see your destiny?" A quiet voice said from the shadows. Harry could see the figures outline but didn't need light to know who it was.

"Shouldn't you be sleeping?" He asked

"I could say the same to you." The person said calmly

"I don't sleep. Not at night. Not anymore." Harry said solemnly, but he wasn't sad like usual. "Aren't you going to sit?"

The shadow chuckled and slid into the chair. Harry jumped when he saw she was still cloaked in darkness.

"How do you do that?!" he asked, bolting upright in his chair. He shouldn't have trusted so easily.

"Relax, geez." Alana said, still chuckling and a shadowy arm reached to her head and pulled off the darkness. "Neat huh?"

Harry laughed nervously "Yeah, neat. What is it?"

"A spell. Actually lots of them woven together. It's a concealment. A glamour. See?" She flicked her wrist as if to throw the shadow into the fire, but it shattered into thousands of multicoloured shimmering sparks.

"That's incredible." Harry said "Can you teach me how to do that?"

Alana chuckled again. "Maybe. You'd have to learn some of my magic first. And being able to do it without a wand is definitely important."

"Then I'm guessing it won't be anytime soon."

"Depends on how talented you are. Have you ever even tried to do magic without a wand?"

Harry shook his head. "Not on purpose, no."

Alana shrugged and lapsed into thought. She adopted a strange look on her face as she gazed into nothingness. Harry couldn't help but laugh.

"What's so funny Potter?" Alana said, but not cruelly

"Oh, nothing." He said with laughter still in his voice.

"Forget you." She replied and lapsed again, this time without pulling a face. Eventually Harry joined her in thinking. That happens when you have nothing to do.

"So what were you doing down here?" Harry finally asked, breaking the silence.

"Same as you I guess." She said quietly. "You know, sitting, thinking...feeling alone." She paused, but after a little thought added "But I suppose I'm not so alone anymore, not with you sitting right there." Harry had the distinct feeling that's not what she meant.

"Why can't you sleep?" Harry continued

"Dreams." She muttered in disgust "My dreams are strongest around this time of year, the equinoxes usually. Every memory I've tried to block out comes storming back in. Either that or pointless nightmares I can't figure out. Nothing matches up." Her voice was bitter and cold. Nothing like her usually jovial tone.

"I know how you feel." Harry said equally as quietly, his emotions starting to creep up on him. "I've been having nightmares for nearly two years now. Awful stuff, things I could have avoided." He shook his head and slumped back in the chair. "And the worst part is, I made it all happen. Everyone tells me it's not my fault but I know it is. They just don't want me to freak out or anything."

Alana listened silently from the other side of the hearth. She knew better than to interrupt someone when they needed to rant. Never mind the fact that disturbing and emotionally unstable and magical person was not a very bright thing to do, not bright at all. And of course, she had found that out the hard way. And quite a few times, actually.

"Cedric would still be alive if it wasn't for me. I convinced him to take the cup with me. If I had only done what he asked and taken it on my own, that bastard Pettigrew never would have killed him. Then last year, if I had done the damn Occulmency lessons like I was supposed to, I wouldn't have dragged everyone off to the ministry so we could rescue Sirius, who wasn't even in danger mind you. Then there was my mum and dad. I don't remember them or that night but I know they died because of me. I killed all of those people." Harry was on his feet now and pacing the room frantically, grateful to finally get everything off his chest.

"You know," he said, stopping suddenly. His next words were spoken slowly and pensively, like he spend a great deal of time thinking about them. "I think the world would be better off if Voldemort had killed me. That way, everyone would still be alive." His esteem reached an all time low at that very moment. Deciding she'd better intervene before he did something stupid, Alan stood up and grabbed Harry by the shoulders.

"Would you stop already?" she hissed angrily "You sound more deranged than usual." Harry glanced up and half-heartedly stuck out his tongue.

"Do you realize, if this Voldemort character had killed you, he would have had a thirteen year start on his plan? All the horrors from before would be a hundred times worse. I doubt there would be a single person in this school that was half-blood or less because they would all be dead. Hermione would probably be gone, someone would have found out she was a muggle born witch and killed her. Your parents would be dead anyways because they stood up against Voldemort when he tried to kill you. Ron's family would be gone too, Mr. Weasley loves mortals too much for Voldemort to even consider his blood. Dean is Muggle born! Seamus is half and half! Neville is nearly a squib! The caretaker Filch, no magic there! Hagrid, half giant half wizard and expelled as a teenager by Voldemort himself! Even Albus..." Alan knew she hit something in him because as soon as he heard Dumbledore's name, his head snapped up and his eyes bored straight into hers

"Yes Harry, Albus too. Do you really think that after thirteen extra years Voldemort would still be afraid of him? He would be gone too. Dead. With that ghastly dark mark hovering over his home. Do you realize what you are? You're going to hate my saying this but even though you were only a year old, you really were the savoir of the wizarding world, if not the entire world itself? And over the years you've proven that you are the only one who can fight him successfully. You have never left a battle with Voldemort any worse off thana concussion or a busted leg. Harry, even Voldemort himself sees you as a huge threat and that really means something. Without you, I don't think even I would be alive. No doubt Voldemort would have checked up on a legend as bloodthirsty as mine, and when he found out we stopped that sort of thing, he'd kill us. We may be strong, but I doubt we're strong enought to fight his army of Deatheaters, Dark Creatures and Necromancers. You are most likely one of the most powerful wizards in the world, and Voldemort knows it."

Harry couldn't speak. This girl, the one he had known for barely over a week, had just changed his entire outlook on the war. She changed everything, made him realize the truth and knew there was no way around it now. His destiny was set in stone and there were only a few words left to carve.

And the victor of the eternity long battle of Good and Evil, Light and Dark is.....

"I've got to sit down." Were the only words he could manage. His head was spinning, he felt nauseous.

The Truth.....

The room was spinning.

The Reality.....

His eyes were going dark.

Everyone was lining up for the final battle, and he was on the front line.....