It was now the next Thursday, the day before Sara would be moving in. Jesse and Becky were up in the attic, finishing up the last few touches on Sara's new bedroom. They had just finished painting the second coat. They had spent a lot of time trying to decide what color would best suit a 13-year-old girl.
"Do you think pink is too girly?" Becky had asked. Jesse shuddered.
"Yes it is, in my opinion. But from Sara's perspective, she struck me as a tomboy so pink might be too much." He had replied, so the two went to Stephanie for advice. She had recommended baby blue.
"It's a good neutral color you really can't go wrong with." Stephanie explained so they took her advice.
Now Jesse and Becky were staring at the finished blue walls with smiles on their faces.
"I think that looks perfect." Becky said happily.
"So all we have left to do is put in the furniture and all the last minute stuff." Jesse added. Becky nodded and then sighed.
"Do you think we still made the right choice?" She asked. "I mean, there's no going back."
"You're right, no going back, only forward, but I really think this is right. I felt it when I first met her." Jesse replied.
"I did too, and I really think Sara needs us, even though she may not ever admit it." Becky said as she leaned against her husband. He held her close.
"You're right, it may take some time for us to get through to her but we'll manage. We'll get through to her but we'll manage. We'll get through it as a family." Jesse said. Becky smiled.
"You're right. Family's never failed us before." She said. They held each other close as they stayed in Sara's new bedroom for a while, taking it all in. In 24 hours, they would become the new parents of a 13-year-old girl.
Sara woke up early on Friday morning, when the sunlight shone through the window in the dormitory. She had barely slept all night, as she worried about the next day. Sara felt so frightened and confused; she didn't know what to do. She was completely alone. She hadn't spoken to Britney since they argued in the park, and she was avoiding Ms. Morrison as well. She didn't want to see, or talk to anybody. She hadn't been eating either. She had no desire to eat food; she felt too depressed and nervous. She had been excusing herself from all meals, bringing her food up to the dormitory, and then throwing the food away. Her whole life was changing, and she had no say in the matter. Part of her was wishing she and Britney were still speaking, because she was dealing with one of the hardest things she had ever dealt with, and she didn't even have her best friend with her. She just felt so angry, but at the same time, she felt so alone. Sara could no longer make sense of her feelings. She couldn't make sense out of anything. She couldn't make sense of the fact that she wasn't eating at all, and she especially couldn't make sense of the fact that she had cut her wrist the day before. It was something Sara had never done before, but could remember watching her mother doing it. Luckily, she was able to cover the shallow cuts with several bracelets she owned. Sara felt as though she were falling apart, emotionally and physically. She had been feeling so sick for the last few days, and when she woke up that Friday morning, it was worse than ever.
Sara heard the dormitory door open and she knew it would probably be Ms. Morrison, so she closed her eyes tightly, hoping to avoid her. Ms. Morrison sat on the edge of Sara's bed, and shook the young girl gently. Sara opened her eyes and stared at her social worker. Oh gosh, we're not leaving yet are we? Sara thought to herself as she waited for Ms. Morrison to say something.
"Good morning Sara. I just wanted to come and let you know we're going to be leaving here after your classes, around 3:00p.m., so I think that maybe you should pack before breakfast, so we'll be ready to go." Ms. Morrison said, and Sara saw something she hadn't seen in Ms. Morrison before. A sense of sadness. Sara hadn't thought about this before, but was Ms. Morrison sad that Sara was leaving? All at once, Sara had realized she had been thinking about herself so much through the past week, she hadn't thought about how this was affecting Ms. Morrison, or even Britney. It was then that Sara began to feel overwhelmingly depressed. It suddenly hit her; she was leaving today, and she had spent the whole week avoiding the only two people in her life that mattered.
"Okay." Sara said meekly, surprising Ms. Morrison. Ms. Morrison thought she was going to get the usual attitude from Sara, and she knew that something was up.
"Sara, are you okay?" Ms. Morrison asked, knowing very well the young girl was not okay, but had to ask anyway. Sara shrugged.
"You'll…you'll come visit me when I'm there, won't you?" She asked quietly, holding back a tear. Ms. Morrison smiled and pulled the girl into a loving hug.
"Of course I'm going to visit you. I love you very much, and I know you'll be just fine." Ms. Morrison pulled out of the hug and looked over at Britney's bed, where Britney was still sleeping soundly. "But if I were you, I'd try to make things right with Britney before you leave. She misses you, and I know you miss her too." Ms. Morrison tapped Sara on the nose gently as she walked out of the dormitory. Sara sighed, and knew her social worker was right. She did miss her best friend, and she knew very well she couldn't leave today without making amends with Britney.
Sara crawled out of bed and hopped onto Britney's, causing her to stir slightly. Sara had felt so ashamed suddenly for ignoring her all week, and prayed to God that Britney would forgive her.
Britney's eyes opened slowly and she looked up to see Sara sitting on the edge of her bed.
"Hi." Sara whispered shyly as Britney sat up in her bed, rubbing her eyes. Sara didn't really know how Britney would react to her speaking to her for the first time in a week, but she needed to try. By the end of the day, she would be leaving for good, and knew she would not be allowed to see Britney on a daily basis. Things were going to change, and Sara definitely did not want to leave on a bad note with her best friend. Sara felt her eyes stinging as she thought about leaving Britney. She would no longer have the luxury of being able to lie on the front lawn with her, staring at the clouds, or swinging on the swings at the park, or even the little things like waking up in the morning together and going to bed together at night. Sara never realized how special Britney had been to her during the last several months. Britney had been the first to greet Sara and they became friends instantly, and now, as Sara waited for Britney to say something, she wondered if their friendship would survive the adoption. She kept her tears back, as Britney yawned and finally responded.
"Hey Sara, so you're talking to me now?" She asked with a frown. Sara looked down.
"I shouldn't have got angry. I'm sorry Britney. I've just been really…really…"
"I know. It's okay." Britney replied with a small smile. Sara returned it with a sigh.
"You don't look too good Sara, are you feeling alright?" Britney asked, noticing the pale color in Sara's cheeks. Sara shrugged.
"Nerves, I guess." She replied. She began to wonder if it was just nerves though. She felt weak, lightheaded and she felt nauseated, but she didn't tell anybody.
"Do you know when you're leaving?" Britney asked.
"After class, so I'm supposed to pack now. Ms. Morrison wants to leave right away." Sara replied. Britney sighed and Sara was sure she saw a single tear roll down her cheek.
"I'm gonna miss you too Britney." Sara struggled to say, and the two girls embraced. Britney cried, but Sara couldn't. She knew if she allowed herself to cry, she wouldn't be able to stop.
"Well, uh, can I help you pack?" Britney asked as she wiped away her last tear. Sara nodded as she pulled out the large suitcase Ms. Morrison had left for her. For the rest of the morning, while the other girls were waking up, Britney and Sara packed. When they had finished, Britney asked if she wanted to go get some breakfast.
"No that's okay. I already had some before you woke up." Sara lied, and she watched as Britney shrugged and left the dormitory with the other girls.
Sara didn't bother taking any notebooks or pencils to class with her since it was her last day. She went to her first class and sat at her desk alone, waiting for her classmates to finish breakfast. So many thoughts were racing through her mind as she stared out the window. She tried to think of a way to get out of it, but knew it was impossible. She knew how the system worked. Once the papers were signed, it was permanent. She tried to imagine what it would be like when she walked into that large house on Gerrard Street for the second time. Ms. Morrison wouldn't stay with her like she did for the interview. Sara would be alone with these strangers. Sara began to feel sick again and she laid her head on her desk as her classmates began to enter. Sara sighed. She wouldn't even be able to spend her last six hours with Britney because she was stuck in her eighth grade class while Britney was in her ninth grade class. Sara just wanted to cry but just before her teacher, Ms. Alfonzo began the English lesson, Ms. Morrison knocked on the door and she quietly spoke to Ms. Alfonzo by the door. Oh gosh, I hope I'm not leaving early. Sara felt her stomach turn as Ms. Morrison stared at her and beckoned her to the door. Sara swallowed hard and could feel her classmates' eyes on her as she got up and followed her social worker out of the classroom. Ms. Morrison shut the door behind them and could immediately read Sara's facial expression.
"No! We're not leaving yet, don't worry honey. I have a surprise for you." She watched as Sara's face changed from fear to confusion. Ms. Morrison smiled and pointed at the front doors. Sara turned and saw Britney standing, holding a basketball, with a smile. Sara puckered her brow and looked back at her social worker.
"What's going on, Ms. Morrison?" Sara asked with confusion in her eyes.
"It's your last day. I want you to spend it with your best friend. You guys have permission to go to the park. I've excused you both from your classes." Ms. Morrison smiled as she saw Sara's face light up.
"Are you serious?" Sara asked with the smallest hint of a smile. Ms. Morrison nodded.
"Today is your day Sara. It's the least I can do." She replied. Sara smiled, thanked her, and ran toward the door but stopped herself halfway. It's your day. She thought about all the people who she would be leaving behind, and two of them stood out in her mind. Britney, her best friend, who had been so great to her, and her social worker, Ms. Morrison. Sara realized just then how much her social worker meant to her. Ms. Morrison had always done everything she could to take care of Sara, and had always been there for her, even though Sara would never let her in. Ms. Morrison never gave up on her, and as Sara looked back at Ms. Morrison, with Britney waiting by the front doors, Sara knew that Ms. Morrison truly loved her, and Sara would greatly miss her.
She walked back to Ms. Morrison, who looked at her curiously.
"Sara, what are you doing? Don't you want to go?" She asked. Sara nodded.
"Yes, I do. But you said this is my day, so…I want you to come too." She replied quietly. Ms. Morrison's heart sank. She was very surprised, especially since Sara had never opened up to her before today, and now she wanted to spend time with her. Ms. Morrison smiled.
"You want me to come? Are you sure?" She asked. Sara nodded.
"Yes, I'm sure. I want to spend my last day with Britney, and with you." She replied. Ms. Morrison nodded with a big smile.
"Alright then, let's go." She said and she followed the girls out the door and to the park.
For the rest of the day, Sara, Britney and Ms. Morrison played basketball at the park, swung on the swings, played a game of hide and seek and had a picnic. Sara had felt so happy in those hours spent with the two most important people in her life. Her stomach ache was forgotten, as were all of her concerns and fears about being adopted, and for those hours, she didn't even think about any of it.
Until 2:30p.m.