Author's Note: Wow been a while since I have written something that
actually has meaning like this does. This chapter has been haunting me
for a while and I needed to write it before it drove me crazy.
This chapter isn't really witty. It is more like service announcement.
All the facts mentioned are true. I would like to thank RAINN (Rape,
Abuse, and Incest National Network) for being a very informative
website. If you wish to know more about this subject I suggest their
website. love Allie
Chapter 8
Julie's POV
I felt like I had been stabbed in the stomach. Why the hell had I let Connie talk me into making me here? I hated the hospital. Always had. So I tried to go there as little as possible.
Connie kept insisting that this wasn't a hospital. It was a Rape/Pregnancy crisis center, Athena.
Whatever it was, I was sitting in its stuffy waiting room; Connie and Guy flanking either side of me to make sure I didn't run away.
"Julie Gaffney?" a lady dressed all in pink poked her head into the room I stood and she motioned me to follow her. My hands shook. Connie rose to go with me but I shook my head, knowing this is something that I would have to do on my own. She nodded and let me go.
I followed the woman down the white hall simply decorated with pictures of flowers. "Going for a homey touch," I thought miserably. I was just trying to prepare my self for what would come.
She led me into a small examining room and gave me one of the retched paper gowns that left you exposed. That was the last thing I wanted. It would make me vulnerable again. Something I never wanted to be again. When the woman left me to change I threw the damn thing away and sat on the table.
A woman in a white coat came in. In her mid-thirties she had soft blonde hair and stark green eyes. She looked up from a chart at me.
"Julie? Hello I'm Doctor Jacqueline Gupta." She stuck out her hand, I shook it gently. "Would you like to tell me why you are here?" My eyes drifted to the purple carpet. I struggled to take deep breaths. My legs started to shake again. "Julie? I can't help you if you don't tell me." She said gently, as if coaxing a cat out of a tree.
"I- I- I," I closed my eyes pretending that I was just telling Connie again. "I was raped." I opened my eyes to find her looking at me expectantly, finding I wouldn't tell her any more she nodded and made a note on her chart.
"Well now we can get some where. Julie, one thing you must realize that you must be honest with me if you aren't we can't get anywhere. And you must trust me; everything you say here will be kept in strict confidence. Do you trust me?" I nodded and looked up at her, her green eyes echoing something I couldn't see. "Do you know the person that raped you?" I nodded again.
"My boyfriend, Scooter. That's why it's not rape! We are going out! That's why it's not r—." she cut me off.
"Julie, did you say no?"
"Well, I couldn't say anything..."
"Did you say no?" she said cutting me off again.
I closed my eyes. "I didn't want it if that's what you mean."
"Then it is rape. No matter how old he is if you said 'no' it's rape. We are going to have to do a couple tests to make sure that you really were and see if we can get any concrete evidence on him."
"That mean's I have to put on the gown, don't I?" I said gloomily looking at the wadded up piece of paper that I had tossed in the corner. She nodded. I got off the table and retrieved it, she left and I changed into it. I sat on the table, it was uncomfortable and cold. I shivered slightly when there was a knock on the door, Doctor Gupta walked in.
And the examination began. I kept my eyes screwed shut. When she asked me questions I answered in one or two words. After about 10 minutes of her trying to make small talk and me not obliging she just asked what she needed to ask. After what seemed like forever of her examining me, she took off her gloves and made a final note on the chart and collected the several samples she had taken.
"Okay, I'm done. You may change. But stay here, I still have several things to talk to you about." She said exiting. I changed back in to my clothes, loving the protection and comfort I found in my jeans and hooded sweatshirt. I sat in one of the chairs that were also crammed into the already cramped room.
Dr. Gupta walked in with several pieces of paper in her arms. She put them on the small end table in the room.
"Julie, while examining you, I found bruises around your thighs and torn tissue. I sent some of the fluid to the lab and they are going to be checking for traces of semen in it. I can also tell them to do a DNA scan. That mean they would find out whom the semen belonged to. I didn't order one because you were certain that your boyfriend raped you. Am I correct?" I nodded and she continued. "I would suggest a counselor, you can get one or we can provide you with one through clinic. Or you can come and talk to me." She shrugged.
I lifted my gaze to her. Her green eyes were shining with the same pain that I had felt when I looked in the mirror the morning after. I nodded. "So I can come and just talk to you here?" I asked skittishly.
"Of course, that's what I'm here for." She smiled at me; though I wanted to smile back I couldn't bring myself to. She nodded and handed me the pamphlets she had put on the table. "That is just some basic information about what you are going through and other's that have gone through what you are going through right now."
I opened the purple tri-folded paper and looked at the list of statistics. "The fact that you came here, Julie, is brave. Only 16 percent of rapes are ever reported. You are one in 6 that that reported that you have been raped." Dr. Gupta explained pointing to the statistics. I kept reading apparently 60 percent of the women that were raped were under the age of 18. And if only one in 6 were reported. That was math I couldn't stand to do. But it was a lot of felonies that were never reported. The most disturbing was over 80 percent of people that were raped knew their attacker.
I didn't realize that I was crying until Dr. Gupta handed me a tissue. I stood. "I better go." I picked up the papers and put them in my bag. As I reached for the doorknob I turned to her, "I'll see you soon" I said leaving.
I walked out of the office clutching my bag as if it had a check for a million dollars in it. Connie and Guy were waiting out side. I nodded to them and we headed back to the campus. Neither of them made me talk so they talked about something that had happened that morning. When we got back I got out of the car and headed up to the dorm. I dumped the pamphlets on my bed and began to read them. Wondering what I would find.
Shout-outs:
due to the fact that Allie wants to get this up a soon as possible and doesn't want to wait for Emmy to get on she is going to post this now. As for the WONDERFUL reviewers...you know who you are and we appreciate each and every one of you! So keep reviewing! And thank you!
Chapter 8
Julie's POV
I felt like I had been stabbed in the stomach. Why the hell had I let Connie talk me into making me here? I hated the hospital. Always had. So I tried to go there as little as possible.
Connie kept insisting that this wasn't a hospital. It was a Rape/Pregnancy crisis center, Athena.
Whatever it was, I was sitting in its stuffy waiting room; Connie and Guy flanking either side of me to make sure I didn't run away.
"Julie Gaffney?" a lady dressed all in pink poked her head into the room I stood and she motioned me to follow her. My hands shook. Connie rose to go with me but I shook my head, knowing this is something that I would have to do on my own. She nodded and let me go.
I followed the woman down the white hall simply decorated with pictures of flowers. "Going for a homey touch," I thought miserably. I was just trying to prepare my self for what would come.
She led me into a small examining room and gave me one of the retched paper gowns that left you exposed. That was the last thing I wanted. It would make me vulnerable again. Something I never wanted to be again. When the woman left me to change I threw the damn thing away and sat on the table.
A woman in a white coat came in. In her mid-thirties she had soft blonde hair and stark green eyes. She looked up from a chart at me.
"Julie? Hello I'm Doctor Jacqueline Gupta." She stuck out her hand, I shook it gently. "Would you like to tell me why you are here?" My eyes drifted to the purple carpet. I struggled to take deep breaths. My legs started to shake again. "Julie? I can't help you if you don't tell me." She said gently, as if coaxing a cat out of a tree.
"I- I- I," I closed my eyes pretending that I was just telling Connie again. "I was raped." I opened my eyes to find her looking at me expectantly, finding I wouldn't tell her any more she nodded and made a note on her chart.
"Well now we can get some where. Julie, one thing you must realize that you must be honest with me if you aren't we can't get anywhere. And you must trust me; everything you say here will be kept in strict confidence. Do you trust me?" I nodded and looked up at her, her green eyes echoing something I couldn't see. "Do you know the person that raped you?" I nodded again.
"My boyfriend, Scooter. That's why it's not rape! We are going out! That's why it's not r—." she cut me off.
"Julie, did you say no?"
"Well, I couldn't say anything..."
"Did you say no?" she said cutting me off again.
I closed my eyes. "I didn't want it if that's what you mean."
"Then it is rape. No matter how old he is if you said 'no' it's rape. We are going to have to do a couple tests to make sure that you really were and see if we can get any concrete evidence on him."
"That mean's I have to put on the gown, don't I?" I said gloomily looking at the wadded up piece of paper that I had tossed in the corner. She nodded. I got off the table and retrieved it, she left and I changed into it. I sat on the table, it was uncomfortable and cold. I shivered slightly when there was a knock on the door, Doctor Gupta walked in.
And the examination began. I kept my eyes screwed shut. When she asked me questions I answered in one or two words. After about 10 minutes of her trying to make small talk and me not obliging she just asked what she needed to ask. After what seemed like forever of her examining me, she took off her gloves and made a final note on the chart and collected the several samples she had taken.
"Okay, I'm done. You may change. But stay here, I still have several things to talk to you about." She said exiting. I changed back in to my clothes, loving the protection and comfort I found in my jeans and hooded sweatshirt. I sat in one of the chairs that were also crammed into the already cramped room.
Dr. Gupta walked in with several pieces of paper in her arms. She put them on the small end table in the room.
"Julie, while examining you, I found bruises around your thighs and torn tissue. I sent some of the fluid to the lab and they are going to be checking for traces of semen in it. I can also tell them to do a DNA scan. That mean they would find out whom the semen belonged to. I didn't order one because you were certain that your boyfriend raped you. Am I correct?" I nodded and she continued. "I would suggest a counselor, you can get one or we can provide you with one through clinic. Or you can come and talk to me." She shrugged.
I lifted my gaze to her. Her green eyes were shining with the same pain that I had felt when I looked in the mirror the morning after. I nodded. "So I can come and just talk to you here?" I asked skittishly.
"Of course, that's what I'm here for." She smiled at me; though I wanted to smile back I couldn't bring myself to. She nodded and handed me the pamphlets she had put on the table. "That is just some basic information about what you are going through and other's that have gone through what you are going through right now."
I opened the purple tri-folded paper and looked at the list of statistics. "The fact that you came here, Julie, is brave. Only 16 percent of rapes are ever reported. You are one in 6 that that reported that you have been raped." Dr. Gupta explained pointing to the statistics. I kept reading apparently 60 percent of the women that were raped were under the age of 18. And if only one in 6 were reported. That was math I couldn't stand to do. But it was a lot of felonies that were never reported. The most disturbing was over 80 percent of people that were raped knew their attacker.
I didn't realize that I was crying until Dr. Gupta handed me a tissue. I stood. "I better go." I picked up the papers and put them in my bag. As I reached for the doorknob I turned to her, "I'll see you soon" I said leaving.
I walked out of the office clutching my bag as if it had a check for a million dollars in it. Connie and Guy were waiting out side. I nodded to them and we headed back to the campus. Neither of them made me talk so they talked about something that had happened that morning. When we got back I got out of the car and headed up to the dorm. I dumped the pamphlets on my bed and began to read them. Wondering what I would find.
Shout-outs:
due to the fact that Allie wants to get this up a soon as possible and doesn't want to wait for Emmy to get on she is going to post this now. As for the WONDERFUL reviewers...you know who you are and we appreciate each and every one of you! So keep reviewing! And thank you!