A/N: Don't kill me! I didn't mean to take so long to update! You can blame it all on my muse. I knew exactly what I was going to put in the chapter, but didn't know how! And also, all thank you's are now at the end. Enjoy the chapter!

Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter, but I do own my plot.

Chapter 7

"You prat!"

"Idiot!"

"Prick!"

"Bitch!"

"Arrogant jerk!"

Lily, Remus, James, and Arabella had been sitting in the common room watching Sapphire and Sirius try to kill each other for the past hour. The reason for the argument was lost long ago.

"Ugh! I'm going to kill you Black!" Sapphire screamed lunging at a smirking Sirius.

"I didn't know you wanted me so much."

Their end position was Sapphire straddling Sirius and him holding her wrists to stop her from strangling him.

James stared. Lily quickly covered his eyes. "Guys! Not in front of the kid!"

Both Sapphire and Sirius turned to look at Lily. James removed Lily's hand from his eyes. He looked at the two teenagers on the floor calculatingly.

"Are you two in love?"

Remus choked at the seemingly innocent question. Arabella started laughing. Lily stared at James for a moment. "You know, you might be right."

"Lily!" Sapphire screamed scandalized, turning red. Sirius looked horrified. "Are you all insane!"

"Then why are you still sitting on Sirius?" James said innocently.

They looked at each other, turned bright red, and tried to move away from each other but only managed to end up sprawled on the floor with their legs tangled up.

"Ooh" Arabella teased. "Look at the two lovebirds on the floor."

Sapphire glared at her. "Traitor."

Sirius snorted. "Like I would date an ugly tomboy like you!"

"Ugly tomboy! Who would want to date a stupid ape like you!"

"Try um, this is so hard. Half the female population!"

"You are so full of yourself you pig! And those girls are all air-headed bimbos!"

"At least…"

James turned to Lily. "They definitely like each other."

"We don't like each other!" Sirius and Sapphire both screamed in unison.

Remus smirked. "If a five year old can see it, it must be true."

They both glared at each other and stormed up their respective dormitories.

"We have to get them together." James said.

Lily looked at him surprised. "Why aren't you the little matchmaker?"

James ignored her. He grabbed a spare piece of parchment lying on the table and began to draw. Lily, Arabella, and Remus all craned their necks to look at what he was doing.

"Done!" James announced, sitting back so that his masterpiece was in full view.

They stared at the scribbles for a moment, trying to make sense of them. "Uh, that's great James." Remus started. "But what exactly is it?"

James looked at him annoyed. "And you say your smart" James said rapping Remus on the head with a quill sharply. "It's pictures for a plan."

"You mean a diagram." Arabella said warily.

"Yeah!" James said brightly.

"So, what is your brilliant plan?" Lily asked, still trying to decipher the lines on the parchment.

James puffed out his chest importantly. "First we tie food to Sapphire's leg" he started using the quill as a pointer. "And then we push her into the lake!"

They all sweatdropped. "But won't the giant squid try to eat her of she has food?" Remus asked.

"That's the point."

"But we don't want to kill her!" Arabella shrieked horrified.

James looked up at the ceiling exasperated. "Sirius has to go save her! And then they'll kiss and make up like in mommy's books."

"Why don't we try a safer plan?" Lily suggested.

James looked at her with challenging eyes. "Like what? Everyone says that I'm the best planner in the whole wide world!"

"A little full of himself isn't he?" Arabella muttered. Remus nodded in agreement.

Lily thought for a moment. "How about something like locking them in a room together?"

"Make it a closet so they have to stay in close proximity to each other." Arabella advised.

James pondered the idea thoughtfully. "Okay!" he said happily. "When do we start?"

"Okay, first we have to…"

Sapphire was pacing in the dormitory angrily. How dare they think that I love that-that smug, conniving little bastard! Some friends they are. Are they completely blind and insane! Could they not have seen me just try to strangle him! And the arguments! I really don't think those are going to lead to wedding bells! Come on, Sapphire Black? Actually, it king of has a nice ring to it. No! The whole point is that I DO NOT LIKE SIRIUS BLACK!

Unknowingly, Sapphire had screamed the last part aloud. From the common room, the four occupants smirked.

"Sound's like someone's in denial."

Things weren't much different in the boy's dormitory. Sirius Black was lying on the bed, flat on his back, glaring daggers at the ceiling. How could they even think that I'd go out with that sorry excuse of a girl! She has practically no curves (which wasn't true), a loud annoying voice, beautiful black shiny hair, sparkling blue eyes- hey wait! No! Have I gone insane! Oh no! I'm possessed! Help! I AM NOT IN LOVE WITH SAPPHIRE HARTFORD!

The four plotters looked up when they heard Sirius' voice.

"They both think so much alike it's scary." Remus commented. The other three nodded in agreement.

"Ouch! You're stepping on me!" Arabella hissed.

"Sorry". Remus whispered.

"Shhhh! They're coming this way!" Lily said quietly.

James was watching the unsuspecting arguing future couple with interest. He quite liked the idea of locking them in a closet. Lily had even been able to put a wizarding camera inside so that they could see what was happening. After all, they didn't want them both to kill each other.

"Can't you just leave me alone you stupid prick!" Sapphire yelled, whacking Sirius on the head with her potions text; the thickest and heaviest of them all.

"Ow! That hurt!"

"It was supposed to id- oh, hi guys!" Sapphire said spotting the group as she rounded the corner. "Whatcha doing?"

"Oh Sapphire!" James said pretending to be relieved. "Could you help me? I think I dropped my teddy in there" James pointed to the open closet with an expression like he was going to burst into tears. "He'll be lonely all by himself."

"Of course I will!" Sapphire said warmly. She got her wand to provide some light in the dark closet and began looking.

Sirius looked at James suspiciously. James never had a teddy bear at this age. In fact, he hated them with a passion; always thought they were 'too girly' or something like that. So why the sudden change? I was possible that Lily might have given him one; Merlin knows that that boy would treasure anything from her no matter what age. However Sirius was almost positive that James hadn't been carrying around a teddy anytime during the week.

"I think I found it!" Came Sapphire's exclamation from the closet. Sirius moved closer to get a better look. He was curious to see what it looked like. It must have either been from Lily or extremely interesting.

Remus, Arabella, Lily, and James all exchanged looks. It was time. Remus tackled Sirius and held him in place while Arabella, Lily, and James shoved him in the closet with Sapphire. Then they shut the door and turned the key.

"Hey!" Came two muffled voices from inside.

"Sorry Sapphire, Sirius" James spoke up cheerfully. "You two need to learn to sur-ser"

"Sort?" Lily provided.

"Yeah that. Sort out your differations." James finished a-matter-of-factly.

"You little sneak! You were behind this whole thing weren't you?" Sirius accused.

"Now now Sirius, how could you accuse such an innocent child of doing such a thing?" Arabella said holding back a smile.

Furious pounding on the door answered her question.

Smirking, Remus called out "Have fun you two! And don't kill each other!"

Sapphire glared at the door, thinking that if it was intense enough, a hole would appear. But alas, nothing happened. Giving up, she leaned back against the wall still fuming.

"Look on the bright side. At least you're stuck in here with me."

"And how, pray tell, is that a good thing Black?"

"Because I'm smart, funny, sexy, in short, every girls dream." Sapphire could almost feel the arrogant smirk radiating off of him.

"In your dreams." Came the muttered reply.

"Hey, if anyone should be complaining, it should be me. I'm stuck in here with a curveless tomboy who's too much of a stuck-up-bitch."

Sapphire kept silent. Was that really what he thought of her? Surprisingly, those words cut deep. Maybe if it was anyone else but Sirius…Against her will, she felt her bright blue eyes fill up with tears.

James was frowning at the screen. "Sirius is mean."

"I agree." Arabella said, taking some buttered popcorn and stuffing it in her mouth.

Lily was fuming. "How dare he say those things to her! Sapphire is a gorgeous girl who is very friendly and is in no way a bitch!"

The other three ignored her.

"I wonder how Sirius is going to deal with this problem." Remus said smirking.

"What problem?" Arabella asked confused.

"Sapphire looks like she's about to cry."

The others looked at the screen and saw that Remus was right- like he always is.

"Sirius is hilarious around crying girls. The poor bloke just doesn't know how to deal with them."

James looked at the screen with interest. "Then this should be fun."

Sirius was a little scared. Sapphire hadn't said a word for the past five minutes. Usually she would be smacking him over the head with a broom by now.

"Hartford?"

There was no response.

"What's wrong?"

Then he heard a sniff. Sirius froze. Oh no, oh no, oh no! Please don't tell me she's crying! What am I supposed to do?

Sirius moved a bit so that his back was facing a corner. From this position, he could see Sapphire's face clearly. Sure enough, silent tears were streaming down from sad looking eyes.

A panicked look crossed Sirius' face. He was horrible with crying girls! Peter could do better than him! Sirius turned his face up to the ceiling, unknowingly looking right at the camera, and prayed to Merlin to help him.

Lily panicked when she saw Sirius look at the camera and mouth the words 'help me'. "Does he know? How could he know! Oh my god he's going to kill me! Oh why did the camera have to be my idea?"

The attention was turned away from the screen for a moment as the other three occupants of the common room tried to calm down a hysterical Lily.

"Calm down Lily!" Remus finally yelled. "He was probably praying to Merlin or something and unknowingly looked at the camera!"

"You think so?" Lily asked calming down.

Remus nodded.

"Ok then!" Lily said happily and grabbed the popcorn bowl.

"Hartford- Sapphire, you aren't hurt about what I said earlier are you?" Sirius started nervously. Then he mentally smacked himself in the head. Of course she was! Geez, he was starting to sound like an idiot already!

Sapphire was thinking the same thing. Of course I am! What do you think I'm upset about, breaking a nail! However, she didn't voice the thought aloud.

"Well, if it makes you feel better, I didn't mean it. Well I did but I don't now. Wait, I mean I don't mean it at all, but I meant it when I said it. But that would have meant that I meant it but saying that won't make you feel better. Ok, so I used to mean it but I don't now. Dang it! I'm repeating myself!"

Sirius tugged on his hair furiously. How was he supposed to say this! Deciding to take the easiest way out, he knelt down on two knees and begged. "Please stop crying! I'll do anything! Just please stop!"

He cut off abruptly when he saw what Sapphire was doing. She was doubled over with tears still streaming down he face, shoulders shaking, wait, she was LAUGHING! He was trying to make her feel better and she was laughing! That's just cruel.

"You – are – so – funny – when – you're – trying – to – apologize!" Sapphire said between laughs. Then she gave up trying to stand and just collapsed on the floor.

Sirius scowled. This was not funny. Of course he achieved his goal of making stop crying, but of course, it was at his own expense.

"I'm glad you think I'm hilarious." He said dryly. "But what was I supposed to say?"

Sapphire dried her eyes and said "All you had to say was that you regret making fun of me."

Sirius looked at her incredulously. "That's it!"

Sapphire nodded. "But I don't mind the way you did it. After all, now you have to do something for me."

Sirius looked confused for a second. I'll do anything. Just stop crying! He paled. Him and his big mouth.

Four occupants of the common room were laughing insanely. Other people were backing away slowly, slightly afraid.

"It looks like Sirius dug himself into one big hole!" Remus howled.

James looked at him confused. "A hole? But he doesn't have a shovel! And it looks like he's standing on the ground."

"It's an expression James." Lily said ruffling his messy hair fondly.

"I wonder what Saffy is going to make him do!" Arabella said; her eyes lit with anticipation. "The possibilities are endless!"

Their attention was turned towards the screen once more. Who knew locking two enemies in a closet in an attempt of matchmaking could be so entertaining?

A/N: I'm evil, I think I left a cliffy. I was originally going to make the whole closet scene into one chapter, but it was getting to be too long and I felt horrible for making all you people wait so long for an update. But you could all forgive me right? I also apologize for any mistakes in this chapter. My beta redpillow is still on vacation and is coming back in a week. I think you all would rather gat a chapter a week early with mistakes rather than wait. It's so sad; school is starting in around two weeks! I will definitely try to update before then, but no promises.

Thank you:

a thousand pieces: you're question was appreciated…but um, can we stick to ones that relate to the story? And sure, I'll read your story.

Sunshine Stacy: Chibi is mini, small…that kind of thing. In this case, it means kid.

singdownthemoon: If I could have a marauder, I would most definitely pick Sirius.

Trapped Rabbit: Silver Mayflower: Miss Kay-chan: KicKstand: chunky-01: Hazel-Hiss: Kristin: Miss Myrtle360: Tmidge: cylobaby: Remus'Fiance: emerald eyes of flame: demonic angel23: Procrastinator-starting2moro: victorprimis: Hikariz: CrimsonReality: juniesfishies: cest.steffie: strwbrrydaquiri: Maylin-Chan: Haruko Higurashi: DLster: Miss.Green Hat: JeNnIfEr88: the-power-of-love: luna: Emily: PsychoLeopard: JillZee: Selene Romanov: remmyluver13: EmeraldhAzel: a thousand pieces: Sunshine Stacy: Chrissy8887779999: J.E.A.R.K.Potter: Amandinka: purtyinpink71121: PotterFan92: Prongsie4028: singdownthemoon: click here: chikichiki

To all new readers: Glad to have you!

I love you guys. Seriously, 44 REVIEWS! I'm getting spoilt :).

Questions:

Chibi Lily or Chibi James? (Thank you Maylin-Chan for this question!)

If you could have one Marauder (not chibi I think), who would you have? (Thank you singdownthemoon for this question!)

All questions encouraged and welcomed!