Red vs. Blue: Vampires abound

Chapter 4:Evil Zombies, and a French Merc

ZR: Sorry for the long update folks, been working on Live and such. Anyway, here it is, Chapter four, full of walking corpses and the flag religious people.

Disclaimer: I do not own anything of Hellsing or of RVB.


"Dibs on this bed!" called Tucker as he leaped onto the closest bed.

Church ran to the one closest to the TV, "Dibs on that bed!"

Caboose ran to the last bed, which happened to be the pull out bed in the living room, "I have the best one!"

"Caboose, what make that bed the best?" asked tucker

"Its big!"

"And hard," added Church

"And it's collapsible!"

"As long as he doesn't collapse it on himself, he'll be fine," whispered Tucker.

"I give him a day to crush himself," said Church.

"Six hours," replied Tucker.

The door to the room opened, Church and Tucker turned their heads to see who it was, and it was Walter.

"Sorry to interrupt, but how are you fairing so far gentlemen?"

"Just one question Walter. Just how big is this place?" asked Church.

"Big enough to accommodate to vampires, the Director, the staff, including me, and fifty soldiers, with room to spare of course."

"Whoa whoa whoa, I thought there was only one vampire here, you mean there is two?"

"Yes, you saw them both at Sir Integra's office."

"Oh oh! Is it that girl in the blue dress?" called Caboose.

"Yes, quite right. Now if you excuse me, I have to get dinner ready," he said as he closed the door. Tucker was still staring at the door, dumbstruck at the fact that the only cute chick here was a vampire.

Alarms began to blare. Tucker snapped back from his world of a broken heart, "What's going on?"

"How should I know, we've been here for almost an hour."

"Maybe, maybe it's the balloon time alarm!" exclaimed Caboose.

Tucker and Church stared at Caboose, "Caboose, I don't even want to know what balloon time is," said Tucker.

The door opened once again and Walter was standing there once again, "Integra wants you along with the reds down on the ground immediately, she think that there may be a use to you lot until we can get you back to your world."

Tucker groaned, "Damnit, I was hoping we were going to actually relax for once."

"Just be quiet Tucker," replied Church.

Down on the grounds, a relatively tall man, wearing an eye patch over his left eye and his long blonde hair braided in a pony tail down his back was pacing back and forth in front of three APCs.

"Integra said zat zere would be some new recruits for zis mission. I just hope zey aren't to bad," he though to himself

Just as he stopped pacing, the RVB crew walked up to him, along with Seras, and twenty soldiers. The soldiers, including Seras stopped in a line and saluted him. The soldiers were carrying the usual assault rifles, while Seras on the other hand, was carrying a huge wooden suitcase. The blonde haired man returned the salute, and turned to face the nine newcomers.

"Alright zen, tell me your names, starting from you, the pink one, ending at you, the black one."

"Private Donut."

"Donut? What kind of name is zat?"

"We asked him that, he never told us," answered Griff, "And I'm Private Griff."

"Private Simmons."

"Sergeant Sarge."

"Sergeant Sarge, zats a name I'll never forget."

"Private Michael J. Caboose."

"At least one of you has a decent name."

"Private Tucker."

"Private Church."

"Freelancer Tex."

"A Freelancer eh? Tell me, what weapons are you good at."

"Assault rifle, Sniper rifle, all types of weapons."

"No need for a sniper here, Seras has zat covered quite well," he winked to Seras who blushed slightly. Tex just hmphed quietly, "Alright zen, you lot go get some weapons, if you don't already have any, but don't use your usual ammo."

"And why not," asked Sarge pointing his shotgun at him.

"The creeps were hunting aren't human. Zey are undead, so, you are going to need special bullets for this job.

"What are the special bullets made of?" asked Simmons

"Bullets alloyed with silver, and mercury ignitions."

"Why do we need bullets that have silver in them?" asked Griff.

"Its ze only zing zat kills Vampires, and when you shoot them, aim for the heart or ze head. Zose are ze only places where it will really count."

"Why is that?" asked Tucker.

"If you shoot zem in ze heart or ze head, xey won't regenerate back."

"They regenerate!"

"Yes, zey do," he sighed.

"Captain Pip Bernadette, I thought you would have you men all ready by now," said Alucard.

"Ahh, yes well, zese folks have asked many questions, apparently xey aren't accustomed to vampires."

"Well of course, they're from another world."

"Zat explains ze fancy armor and weapons," he gestured toward them.

"Well get moving, we don't want to waste any more time."

"Alright zen, you lot, get your ammo and weapons, we're moving out."

"I don't have to take orders from you Captain," said Sarge.

Pip pulled out a small cigarette, and stuck it in his mouth, "You're not following orders from me, zey are from Integra, and you will follow zem."

"Fine," he took his finger off the trigger.

"Now, go get your ammo and load up in ze APC. Ze rest of you, get in the vehicles now!"

"Yes sir!"


Back in Cambridge, the Freaks held up in the office building were having a bite to drink. The building's security team tried to take them out, unfortunately, the Freaks were to powerful for their guns. The religious Red and Blues were huddled in another room, trying to block out the grotesque noises from the Freaks enjoying their meal.

One of the three Freaks lifted his head up from the now lifeless corpse, licking the crimson blood from his lips, "Nothing like a fresh kill, eh guys?"

Another Freak lifted his head up from another security guard's neck, "Yeah, not as good as virgin blood, but good anyway," he rummaged around in the guard's pocket, and took out his wallet. He opened it up, and a string of pictures fell out, " Heh, looky here, this guy has a family. Shit man, his wife is a babe. Here take a look." He handed a picture of his wife to another Freak.

He took the picture in his hands and studied it, "She looks to be about 35. But check the rack on her dude! What is that, 38DD?"

The first Freak snatched the picture away from him, "Nah, too small, probably a 30E."

One of the bodies moaned slightly, and stood up, the face of the guard gray and expressionless.

"Well well, looks like we've got ourselves some slaves now, huh boys?"

"Yeah, let them take care of the police, then we get the bodies."

"Save some for the ghouls man, they need the meat."

"Oh yeah, I forgot they can turn them into ghouls as well."

The trio started to laugh insanely, thinking about the screams of terror from the police as they fell to the ghouls.


On route to Cambridge, the Hellsing APCs, escorted by three Hummers, were traveling as fast as they could to get to Cambridge, before more innocent people were either killed, or turned into ghouls.

Pip's voice came over the vehicle radios, "Alright zen boys and girls, our objective is Cambridge. A small office building has been taken by at least zree Freaks. The police have already secured the area around the building, but once we arrive, ze entire situation is under our control. Second squad is to clear out ze building of enemy ghouls zat includes our nine newcomers. Mr. Redcoat is going after ze Freaks. If you happen to see ze Freaks, retreat immediately. Zey are reportedly to be class A vampires, so stay as far away from zem as possible"

In the middle APC, the RVB crew, and the rest of second squad, was thinking of how the situation could turn out. Except for Caboose, he was thinking of Sheila…or something about naptime. Who could really tell?

Tucker on the other hand, was still staring at Seras, and think about her as well. We don't want to know what he was thinking, as usual.

Sarge was still scowling at the fact that he had to take orders from a captain. Even in this world, the military cast system showed that captains took orders from Sergeants.

In short, the only ones in the RVB crew that were thinking about the situation, was Tex, Church, Griff and Simmons. Donut was…well…sleeping.


ZR: Poor poor ReligiousReds and Blues. Held hostage in a Freak situation with no food, water, and scared shitless. How will they hold out? And will the RVB crew even make it out alive? I don't know at this point! Just review please!