I have more than enough reviews for an update. So…
When we left the Smashers, Zelda had discovered Luigi's experiment, thanks to Ness. Stupid little kid...he was good in the first one, now he's just a little bit- oh! Um...what will Zelda do now? What will happen to Luigi? When am I getting my pizza? Read on, my demons!
...I'll stop now.
"What do you mean he doesn't love me anymore?" Zelda said angrily, advancing on Luigi.
"Well...princess...you see, the thing is-" A very nervous Luigi was cut off.
"He forced him to drink the potion!" Ness yelled from the basement.
"Why did you force him to drink the potion?" Zelda said angrily, still advancing on Luigi.
Luigi was sweating. "Um, heh...well..."
"We wanted him to!" Ness yelled.
"And you pleasured them?" Zelda said angrily, almost right in front of Luigi.
Luigi was sweating bullets. "Listen...uh...I..."
"It was funny!" Ness yelled.
"NESS, SHUT THE (beep) UP!"
"I'll take care of this." Peach took out a billiard stick and stomped downstairs. "Hey!"
Ness screamed like a girl.
"Didn't I say to shut up? Huh?"
"I didn't mean it! I'm a kid! Kids do that! SPARE ME!"
The sound of wood impacting flesh could be heard. All of the Smashers groan...except Link, who is now speaking dirty things to the table, and asking questions like "Where do I put it at, baby?". Sad...yet amusing.
"...I hope you have a way of making my Link love me again! You're a dead man if you don't!" Zelda said. Duh.
"Making...I got it!" Luigi exclaimed.
"What?" every sane person said.
"If I can't make an antidote that cures him, why not override the effect and give him the same potion again?"
"Is that really a good idea?" asked Samus.
"...It sounded nice..."
"What if he ends up loving both? That could happen...and that'll really screw up his brain. He might die."
"You have crushed my self-esteem, oh, so deeply..." Luigi looked at the floor.
"That's what I do."
"Linky-pie, don't you remember me at all?" asked Zelda sweetly.
"...Linky-pie?" everyone said.
"Excuse me. I'm sorry, but I'm conversing with my wife-to-be. We'll be so happy together, I know it!"
"WIFE-TO-BE? He really dropped the ball there...I know," Zelda thought. She held her bosoms and said with the sweetest possible voice…which wasn't all that sweet because she was totally pissed…
"You mean you don't remember these at all? All the times we made sweet love to each other?"
"Oh, really?" every sane person said.
"Too much info…" said Marth.
"Yeah…" Roy agreed with a sigh. "They did it more than once?"
"They did it?"
"He doesn't remember those beautiful bosoms?"
"Small, but so, so sweet!" the two said together.
"Shut up..." Zelda said with her fist trembling.
"I've found a new love! My old life was a mistake, but my gorgeous table has made it so much better!" Link said, hugging the table.
"He never called me gorgeous..."
Roy approached Zelda. "That's why I'm here."
"Get back…" Zelda responded angrily.
Enter Ganondorf! This'll be good...
"I feel like I'm missing something I can use to my advantage. What's going on?"
Ness yelled weakly. "Luigi made-"
Peach was still downstairs. "SHUT UP YOU STUPID BRAT!"
More hitting, more groaning…
"What's going on with elf-boy over there?" asked Ganondorf.
"He's in love with that table..." Zelda said disappointingly.
Ganondorf waited a little while before busting out in laughter. Jigglypuff did the same.
"Not this shit again…" DK said.
"Wait! I can take advantage of this! Duh!" Ganondorf snatched the table with a "Yoink!".
"No! Give her back! Return my love!" Link whined.
"Shut up...slave." Ganondorf laughed sinisterly. Everyone gasped. Shortly after that, Luigi started to laugh, and was slapped by Zelda…with a little touch of electricity.
Ouch...
Well, the evil bastard Ganondorf has finally taken advantage of the situation at hand. Link is now his slave. (stifled laughter) What evils will Link have to carry out? Find out in Chapter 4!
Of course, 5 reviews equals an update within a day…normally. I won't be at my house most of the weekend, so I don't know when my next update will be. Sorry, readers…